Feeling like a burden!

“Do you want me to go away?” she asked as he carried her to bed ready for her to sleep.

“Of course not, I want you to be here, stay with me and make me be able to help you out in ways your healing comes fast” he said as he looked at her his eyes filled with warmth.

She had remembered just when Jacqueline had told her to make sure that she told him everything if she felt comfortable that way or not.

And well it felt like she had finally decided she was going to have the conversation with him till the point where he indeed did not want to listen and when she didn’t want to talk anymore.

Alright it was time to get over the fear that is if she could get over the fear without thinking the ground was going to open and swallow her as she spoke of the things that worried her.

She had to accept him, he didn’t have a bad spirit that she felt and knew quite well she knew for a fact that he was ready to listen and he also was ready to help her heal and he was her mate. 

The moon goddess was good she had made sure she gave her a good mate who was ready to be by her side for a very long time and making an entire two weeks in his abode she was certain he won’t hurt her and if he hurt her well as per what Jacqueline had said the pain was going to hit both of them hard because she would have connected to him through the bond they share.

She closed her eyes as she remembered that first night when she was kidnapped she could still decide not to tell him these things but then again she should tell him because from the way he related with his people he gave them love and it seemed they trusted him so she should just give him the benefit of doubt.

“One hundred and forty-four months ago” she began as she signed and he was quite attentive he didn’t want to miss a single sign of what she had to say to him everything was supposed to be said and he was supposed to get her point for point.

“Some rogues broke into our home when I was asleep, six years old and I heard my mum mind link me trying her utmost best to get to me she was captured and my sister had been hidden somewhere but before she or my dad could do their best to get to my room they were captured ‘tied and beaten she could only tell me to get out of bed and head to the neighboring pack so as to ask for help, I did wake up used my tiny hands I took my hearing aids and before I could use the hidden tunnel they had built for stuff like this I was faced by two ugly looking men” 

“I was deprived off my hearing aids as they didn’t want me hearing what they were saying and they made sure I was ridiculed, I was denied food, I was beaten for no reason at all, like when they decided to have fun for the evening after their day of work I was the target, the other girls would be beaten but mine was extreme, I was tortured on a daily and the only thing that could safe me was my mind, when I was beaten I always ran away from myself like literally ran away from myself” she continued as he continued looking at her hands as they moved and how she tired her possible to make sure she didn’t cry but her mate would cry but he was an alpha he could only hold in the pain and cry in there.

 “The day I turned eighteen I am certain that was the day my wolf came out and I transformed in the room that was barely a room as they saw me do everything inside no privacy at all I was beaten because my wolf was white and it stated I was pure and held some other power they hated they made sure they brought one of the girls who was kidnapped with me so I could bite and kill her but I didn’t even after I was given some kind of strong drink to cause me into harming her I held back and rather attacked them as I fought and this was determined a rebellion hence I was beaten for the entire evening whilst they had sexual turns on the girls who had been defiled already”

“I on ly had my wolf again the day the pack was attacked and I decided to run away I guess my wolf had been waiting as she sprung out and took me on a speed I had never known, she ran for close to three hours before I decided we could rest and after that we ran again for another two hours before I found myself in your land” she explained.

Xavier’s mouth opened and closed as he wanted to say something but he decided to listen to her, it was her moment and not his hence he had to listen to her and everything she said without trying to justify anything, as a matter of fact there was nothing there to justify because they had dealt with her in ways he had never punished a woman, for men yes he could punish them that way but for a woman that was something which was far-fetched and they had dealt with her and looking at her he knew she still had a lot of more things to tell him because her hands were shaking but she had made up her mind to tell him everything it was better this way.

His eyes had gotten darker than they were and somehow her instincts began to make her think she was going to be beaten by him for talking too much except he was having a deep thought as to how he was going mess Derrick up for doing this to his mate and his almighty Luna.

“I miss my family and I know Derrick and his men are probably looking for me because somehow they said I was somehow special never understood them to begin with because I always felt pains when hit.

He touched her to which she whimpered and he pulled away knowing he was surely pushing more that he was suppose to and here he just wanted to be sure she knew that she was save in his arms and in his house too. It was her house too that is if she didn’t reject him in total after telling him the story he was listening to.

“I am sorry, please continue dear” he said as he signed back waiting for her to speak and not distract her at all.

“What did they do to you?” he asked as he looked her intently still she could swear she had become used to the stares he gave her and even though it smelled seriousness she somehow believed it meant he was serious about the situation at hand.

That’s when she somehow saw herself back at Derrick’s rogue pack.

The beating, torture, the almost sexual assault situation, she looked at him to see if he was still looking at her and with that she took off her blouse showing him the lines a knife had done to her skin, the silver ware which was use beat her till it drench her in blood and her screams could no longer be heard but painful moans.

The scars still fresh but healing as she had been in his pack, she had bruises; the cuts had been deep because of how daily she had received the whipping from them.

Tears dripping down her eyes and seeing this made him even more angry as he didn’t know what to do but listen, he couldn’t scream, it would scare her, his expression couldn’t change from what it was because it just might make her feel bad she had told him at all.

But how long could this man hold the pain he was feeling inside as he watched his mate fight her scars without reacting?

Without thinking he got up from the chair he had struggled not to awake from as Mathias was hurt his mate had been this hurt he couldn’t hold it in and just like that Nathalia thought she had done something bad as she used her hand to cove her face thinking he wanted to slap her or something just he wanted to hurt her.

She whimpered as she began to shake uncontrollably, he began to growl although not too loud but she could tell it was the same howling she had heard when he had ran up to the mountain which had almost uprooted the house because he felt she wasn’t accepting him.

She crumbled to the ground shaking and Jacqueline ran into the room as she held her, she hugged her, she knew she couldn’t judge any of them because Xavier was okay to behave that way he had not been able to safe his mate from the hurt she had been feeling and it was okay for Nathalia she was going through her demons and she was sharing it with the man she was soon to accept as her mate.

Xavier left the room he knew he was hurting her as he saw her in that state, “What happened?” Jacqueline asked as she sat her down on the chair.

“I explained everything to him just as you had said I should and I guess he didn’t take it so well” she said as she had stopped crying but was still trembling so hard.

“You both are trying and I want you to for sure know that everything that has happened today is how it should be he is trying his best to be there for you” she said as she hugged her even more.

“Why is he trying he should give up” she said as she knew she should have been dead by now so him trying she knew she was hurting him.

“He is trying his best Nathalia; he wants what you both have to work hence his stance on trying , please try giving him that stance okay?” 

“He would come around and you both would make this work” 

“What if he doesn’t come around and what if he wants me away from her because of how I have been and what I have explained to him?” she asked of course she was scared that now that she had decided to accept him into her life he just wanted to be off and away.

She didn’t want to take the heat of it all as Jacqueline had told her she now wanted him and she wouldn’t want to die because she somehow must have found that healing she was or might have been looking for.

Jacqueline decided it was okay for her to take her to somewhere else aside from this bed and this room she could see new faces and maybe make friend if she wanted to make them.

“Thank You Jacqueline I really appreciate the love and dedication you have for me and I hope someday I am able to repay you back” she signed.

She grinned as Jacqueline took out a wheel chair taking her out for a stroll she hoped people were not there meanwhile Jacqueline wished people where there so she could see and know that the Silent Moon had people who loved her and wanted her to stay with tem with no fear and no stress. They all wanted her to heal and she sure was going to heal as she had started telling Xavier her story it meant she was already getting there.