CHAPTER 3

Pagkatapos nila maglaro ni Coleen maghapon ay mabilis itong nakatulog kinagabihan dahil sa sobrang pagod. Kahit papaano ay napanatag na ang loob ni Safirah dahil sa wakas ay hindi na siya mahihirapan sa trabaho niya. Bukod kasi sa hindi na siya sinusungitan ni Coleen ay mabilis rin itong matuto katulad na lamang kanina sa tutor session nila. Matalinong bata si Coleen kaya hindi nahirapan si Safirah na turuan ito ng mga basic lesson para sa isang toddler.

Alas nuwebe na ng gabi natapos kumain ng hapunan si Safirah dahil inayos niya pa lahat ng kalat sa kwarto ni Coleen habang natutulog ito. Pagkatapos niyang hugasan ang ginamit niyang plato ay naisipan niya na rin maligo at magpahinga. Paakyat na sana siya ng hagdan nang marinig niya ang tila tunog ng kotse na pumarada sa harap ng bahay. Lumingon sya at nakita niya si Terence na pumasok sa main door. Natigil si Safirah sa pag akyat sa hagdan.

Gusto niya makausap si Terence tungkol kay Coleen pero nagbago ang isip niya nang makita niyang medyo susuray-suray itong naglalakad patungo sa kusina. Hindi nito napansin ang presensya niya. Sinundan niya ito.

"Terence.."

Lumingon si Terence sa direksyon niya at medyo kumunot ang noo nito nang makita siya.

"Ah yes. Safirah...Coleen's tutor, right?"

"Uhm yes. That's right."

Binuksan nito ang refrigerator at uminom ng malamig na tubig at muling lumingon sa kanya. "I'm sorry if Coleen gave you a headache today."

"No, not at all. She was great today. She's not that difficult to handle."

Gumuhit ang pagtataka sa mukha ni Terence. "Indeed? How? I mean she didn't-"

"Coleen and I had a great day. She's amazing and very nice actually. She behaved well. I just thought you needed to hear this now. But the rest, I guess we should discuss by tomorrow when you are in a better state. I will take a rest now. You should as well."

Hindi na niya ito hinintay na magsalita pa. Tipid lamang siyang ngumiti at tumalikod na para pumunta sa kwarto at magpahinga.

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Maagang gumising si Safirah para ihanda ang breakfast ni Coleen at ang ilang activities nito ngayong araw. Pagkatapos magluto ay pumunta siya sa kwarto nito. 7:00 na ng umaga kaya naman ginising na niya ito.

"Good morning, Coleen. Time to get up. Marami tayong gagawin na exciting today," nakangiting saad ni Safirah.

Kahit antok pa ay pinilit bumangon ni Coleen. Nagkusot ito ng mata at ngumiti kay Safirah. "Good morning too, Safirah," anito sa inaantok na boses. Naghikab pa ito at nag-unat ng katawan.

"C'mon, time to brush your teeth. I made you some delicious breakfast."

"You did?" masayang tanong nito.

Inayos ni Safirah ang magulo nitong buhok. "Of course. I'm not just your tutor, I'm also your nanny, remember?"

Ngumiti ito at tumango tsaka dumiretso na ng banyo habang si Safirah naman ay pumunta sa closet ni Coleen para ihanda ang isusuot nito.

Matapos niyang bihisan si Coleen at ayusin ang buhok nito ay lumabas na sila ng kwarto.

"Good morning, Uncle Terence!"

Lumingon si Safirah sa kanyang likuran at nakita niyang palapit sa kanila si Terence. Bagong gising lamang ito dahil nakasuot pa rin ito ng pantulog. Nakahawak ito sa sintido habang naglalakad.

"Good morning, Coleen," ngumiti ito sa bata at dumako ang tingin nito kay Safirah. "...and to you too Safirah."

Tumango si Safirah bilang ganti sa bati nito. "Good morning, Sir. I mean, Terence."

Gusto niyang sapakin ang sarili dahil natataranta na naman ang puso niya kaya naman inakay na niya si Coleen pababa ng hagdan nang tawagin siya ni Terence. Muli siyang humarap rito pinilit umakto ng kaswal.

"We need to talk. I need to discuss with you about something. Go to my library after eating breakfast. Manang Ofelia will tend to Coleen while we discuss about something."

Marahang tumango si Safirah. "Okay."

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"First of all, thank you Safirah. I am amazed you changed my niece's behavior. I can't believe you did such a great job on your first day." Kahit ganoon ang sinabi nito ay seryoso pa rin ang mukha nito.

Marunong ba siyang ngumiti?

Ngumisi si Safirah ng bahagya. Medyo nailang at nahiya siya sa sinabi nito pero nanatili siyang kalmado.

"You're welcome. I just did what I had to do. Besides, Coleen and I had a similar experience. You know, parents are gone. But different in some ways. That's why I understand her feelings, and that's why I took that chance to talk to her, a heart-to-heart talk. This job is not just taking care of a child, feeding them, or putting them to sleep. It's also about having a deep conversation that will touch her inner emotions so she can understand what's happening around her. Especially, she had experienced the trauma of losing a loved one at an early age."

Nakatitig ito sa kanya habang nagsasalita siya hanggang sa makita niyang bahagyang umangat ang isang gilid ng labi nito.

Ngiti na ba yun?

"That's great. Perhaps those previous people that I hired didn't know that. It was my mistake that I did not review their application and background, since I don't have much time for that. I'm glad you applied for this job."

Tipid na ngiti lang ang sinagot ni Safirah.

"Anyway, I would like to know more about you, Safirah. Just for background reference, as I was saying."

Umayos ng upo si Safirah. "Okay. Where should I begin?"

"Well, aside from what's in your resume. I want to know your family background. Not so detailed."

Tumikhim muna si Safirah bago nagsalita. "I'm an only child. My mother took her own life when I was a teenager. My biological father left us when I was little. I finished college with the help of my teacher in high school but then before I graduated, she died due to severe illness. So now here I am, trying to survive on my own."

Sandaling katahimikan ang namagitan sa kanila bago ito tumango ng bahagya sa sinabi niya bilang pangsang-ayon.

"I'm sorry to hear that. That must be traumatic for you, especially when your mother, as you said, took her own life."

Huminga siya ng malalim. "It's okay. Oo, naging traumatic ang buhay ko noon. Pero kailangan ko bumangon dahil wala naman akong ibang masasandalan kundi ang sarili ko. I got used to the pain and emptiness."

"Such a strong and brave woman," anito at nakataas ang isa nitong kilay.

"Not at all. I'm still experiencing breakdowns sometimes."

Tumango-tango na lamang si Terence sa sinabi niya. "Okay. You, indeed, have had a similarity with Coleen. But my sister, Anna, didn't commit su*cide. She got sick. She wished me to adopt her daughter and told me to never allow the father to see their daughter. So, I promised her that. But since I was busy with my empire of business, I couldn't take care of Coleen full time, that's why I hired people to do so for me, but all of them failed because of how difficult Coleen was to handle. All her tantrums and violent behavior really troubled me. I had already taken her to specialists for the best solution. She had undergone therapies and medication because there was a point when she tried to hurt physically, not just other people but also herself. I was so hopeless since I have never experienced taking care of a child."

"I understand."

llang sandali itong tumitig sa kanya na ikinailang ni Safirah kaya naman tumikhim siya.

"I'm sorry. I was just confused and amazed by how you handled these things and lived a life as if no traumatic experience had happened to you. I know some people became unfortunate and hopeless in life when it comes to trying to achieve something due to their pasts but you-"

"It's because of the teacher who took care of me. She was the reason I became the better me despite my pasts."

Tumango-tango si Terence at nagkibit-balikat. "So nice of her."

Ngumiti ng tipid si Safirah. "I think I should go now. Coleen must be looking for me. I told her we have a lot of exciting activities today."

"Yes, yes of course," anito sa malamig na tono.

Tumayo na si Safirah at tinungo ang pinto. Paglabas niya ay isang malaking buntong-hininga ang pinakawalan niya. Sa hindi niya maipaliwanag na rason ay hindi niya alam bakit ang lakas ng kabog ng dibdib niya habang kaharap niya si Terence kanina lamang.

Sa katunayan hindi siya mapakali sa upuan niya kanina. Parang gusto na niyang matapos ang usapan dahil pakiramdam niya ay mauubusan na siya ng hininga. Pinipilit niya lamang umakto ng normal dahil baka maging katawa-tawa siya sa harap nito kapag nahalata nitong naaapektuhan siya sa presensiya nito.

Naging palaisipan kay Safirah ang naramdaman niya kanina. Nangako siya sa kanyang sarili na kahit anong mangyari ay hindi siya magpapaapekto sa mga lalaki, na mas gugustuhin niyang tumandang dalaga kaysa ang magkagusto sa isang lalaki. Pero bakit ibang-iba ang epekto sa kanya ni Terence? Eh wala naman itong ginagawa o pinapahiwatig na motibo sa kanya?

Sa maghapong iyon ay inabala niya ang kanyang sarili sa pagtuturo at pakikipaglaro kay Coleen para mawala sa isip niya ang bumabagabag sa kanya.

"Safirah, are you okay?" tanong ni Coleen nang mapansin nitong tulala siya sa kawalan.

"H-ha?"

"I said are you okay?" ulit nito sa nag aalalang anyo.

"Y-yah. Okay lang ako. May sumagi lang sa isip ko," aniya at hinaplos ito sa buhok.

"Let me guess. Your boyfriend?"

Natawa siya sa sinabi nito. "Ikaw ha. Syempre hindi. Wala naman akong boyfriend eh. At lalong ayaw ko magka boyfriend."

"Why? You're so pretty. You look like a Disney princess."

Kinurot niya ito sa pisngi. "Marunong ka na mambola ha. Parang gusto ko na ata maniwala."

"Mambola? What's that?"

Tumawa siya. "It's mean, you say something too many nice things that they sound like it's too much. An exaggerating way of complimenting a person than how they were actually looked like."

"But I'm telling the truth."

Kinurot niya ang baba nito. "Is that so? Very well, thank you, Coleen. You look like a Disney princess too."

Ngumiti ito ng matamis sa kanya at ipinagpatuloy ang ginagawa.

"Safirah?"

"Mmmm?"

"Can I ask you a question?" Binaba nito ang hawak na krayola at humarap sa kanya. Seryoso ang mukha nito.

Hinarap niya rin ito. "Sure, why not? What is it?"

"Are you going to live here forever?"

Inayos niya ang nakatabing hibla ng buhok sa maamo nitong mukha. Akma na sana siyang magsasalita.

"Coleen?"

Sabay silang napalingon ng bata. Pasimpleng suminghap si Safirah.

"Yes, Uncle Terence?"

"Sorry to disturb whatever you guys are doing. Do you wanna go out with me and have dinner with Patricia?"

Gumuhit sa mukha ni Coleen ang pagkayamot at dismaya bago ito lumingon kay Safirah. "No, thanks Uncle Terence. I just wanna stay with Safirah. Please?"

Nagkatinginan si Safirah at Terence pero agad bumawi ng tingin si Safirah.

"But it's Patricia's birthday today, are you sure you don't want to go? I'd thought you liked her?"

Natahimik ang bata at nakanguso habang nakayuko. Bumuntong-hininga naman si Terence at tumikhim.

"Okay. I'll just tell Patty you're not feeling well today. But next time, I don't want to hear any more excuses. Look, she's going to be my wife, so it means we're all gonna live together, and we will spend more time with her. Is that clear?"

Marahang tumango lamang ang bata pero nasa mukha nito na tila napipilitan lamang ito. Bumuntong-hininga si Terence at ginulo ang buhok ng bata tsaka tumalikod at umalis.

"Okay ka lang ba Coleen?"

Umayos ito ng upo at humarap sa kanya. "No."

"Bakit?" tanong niya sa bata.

"If Uncle Terence marries Patricia, he will love her more than me. And if they will have children in the future, she will be even more mean to me."

"Mean to you? Your Uncle said you like her."

Umiling ito. "No, I don't. I'm just pretending so Uncle Terence wouldn't scold me. She's mean and ugly."

"Why? What did she do to you?"

"She said mean things to me like, I'm a pest and a little witch, whenever uncle was not around."

Tumaas ang kilay ni Safirah sa narinig. "Why didn't you tell your uncle?"

Huminga ito ng malalim. "He wouldn't believe me, anyway. Besides, he thinks I'm the one being mean to others, and since he's very busy taking care of his businesses, we spent little time together."

"Did she always do this to you?"

"Mmmm, no. I met her a few times though she always comes here but I always lock myself in my room because I don't want to see her. She pretends to like me only when uncle is present."

Nakaramdam ng awa si Safirah kay Coleen dahil sa murang edad nito ay nararanasan na nito ang ganoong pagtrato na kung saan ay hindi naman dapat at hindi nito deserve. Sa kabila niyon ay nakaramdam din siya ng galit sa girlfriend ni Terence kahit hindi niya pa ito nakikilala sa personal. Hindi niya gusto ang pagtrato nito sa bata. Alam niya na wala siya sa lugar para makialam at kausapin si Terence tungkol doon, dahil isa lamang siyang stay-in nanny at tutor ni Coleen. Pero kahit ganoon ay gusto niya pa rin itong kausapin.

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Matapos maghapunan ay inayos muna niya ang mga kalat ni Coleen at hinanda ang susuotin nitong damit na pantulog. Binuksan niya ang closet ngunit may napansin siyang tila litrato na nakaipit sa ilalim ng magkapatong-patong na mga damit. Ayaw sana niyang pakialaman iyon kaso na-curious siya kaya kinuha niya pa rin. Napangitti siya nang makita niya ang litrato ng isang babae na may kargang sanggol. Napakaganda ng babae at hawig na hawig iyon ni Coleen.

"That's my mom."

Napalingon si Safirah sa kanyang likuran. Nakita niya si Coleen at nilapitan niya ito habang hawak pa rin ang litrato.

"She's so pretty just like you," nakangiti niyang sabi rito. Lumuhod siya sa harap nito.

"I missed her. If only she were here, I wouldn't have to deal with Tita Patricia. I don't want to see her, and I don't want her to be part of my family.

Hinaplos niya ang buhok nito. Bumuga siya ng hangin at marahan niyang pinisil ang pisngi nito. "Do you want me to talk with your uncle about Patricia?"

Napamulagat ito. "Yes! But..." bigla rin nagbago ang reaksyon nito. "... but what if she also-"

"Don't worry about that. It might the best way, so that Patricia would stop being mean to you."

Bumagsak ang balikat nito. "Uncle Terence might get mad not just to me but also to you."

Napaisip siya. May punto ito dahil pangalawang araw pa lang niya sa trabaho, ayaw niya na matanggal agad. Mahirap na.

Hay nako.

"Okay. But promise me you will tell me everything in case she does or say something that isn't good. It's not appropriate for an adult to say bad things to kids, especially to you."

Yumuko lamang si Coleen at marahang tumango.

"Don't worry now. Everything will be fine. Go to bed." Ngumiti si Safirah at hinaplos sa pisngi ang bata. Inakay na niya ito sa higaan at inayos ang kumot nito. Akma na siyang tatalikod nang tawagin siya nito.

"Safirah?"

"Yes?" Lumapit siyang muli sa higaan.

"Can you read me first a bedtime story?"

Ngumiti siya at umupo sa gilid ng kama nito. "Of course."

Lumapit siya sa bookshelves at naghanap ng libro na pwede niyang basahin.

"How about this Brave like a Bee by Emma Scott?"

Masayang tumango si Coleen.