Never What It Was
My wife and I had agreed to spend the holiday at my parents' house.
Right before we walked out the door, she said, "I forgot to change my address again. The package was delivered to Grant's place!"
I went still.
Three years of marriage, and yet she had never once updated her default shipping address.
A microwave she ordered online was delivered to her ex-boyfriend. She said it worked out, since his microwave was broken anyway.
The anniversary gift she had picked out for me was signed for by her ex-boyfriend. She said it would be too awkward to ask for it back.
The Valentine's Day gift she ordered for me online ended up in her ex-boyfriend's hands. She said she could not give me something secondhand, so she let him keep it.
This time, she was ordering a holiday gift basket, and I had reminded her two weeks in advance. It still went to her ex-boyfriend.
I kept my voice as steady as I could. "Go get it back. Drive over there right now."
Her expression darkened. "He already signed for it. How am I supposed to get it back? We'll just pick something up on the way."
"Get it back," I said.
"Do you have to be so petty?" she snapped. "You're a grown man. You always have to make such a big deal out of everything."
Every time something ended up at her ex-boyfriend's place and I asked her to get it back, that was the answer I got.
My hands clenched until the knuckles went white as I watched her slam the door on her way out.
I ignored the dull ache in my chest and sent a message to my lawyer.
"Happy holidays. Could you please draft a divorce agreement for me? Thank you."