CHAPTER 5: Internship

***

HANNAH FELICIANO

“Yeah, it was him.” I validated.

When my friend, Lexy, saw the man standing in a huge building where I presumed that he was waiting for someone, I felt a bit uncomfortable. There was like a tiny dagger which stabbed my heart and broke into pieces. It was the first time I saw him after our break-up, and seeing him there made me feel indisposed and vulnerable. I felt sudden sadness, an emotion which I can turned into something if I could wield my power over me. But, unfortunately, I could not. How I wish I could turn my situation or feeling around, but it was really impossible. I had to undergo with this feeling until I eventually forget him and totally dispel this feeling out, but if you were asking me when, I didn’t know when will I get over Jordan.

I felt an instant sorrow and I felt pity looking at how I could not do anything to myself but was ready to help people with their emotions and situation. I didn’t know if the power within was really helpful, knowing that all emotions were thoroughly fundamental for the well-being of humanity. Nonetheless, irrespective of that fact, for sure, no one wanted to be suffered or to be slaved by them, and this ability helped people a lot, though I was not sure enough because I could not really ask them after telling what I did.

“Shall we go?”

So, Roz asked if we could still carry on despite of the fact that Jordan was on our way, though another detour was suggested but it was too far. I sighed and I talked to myself inwardly, channelling my inner strength down to my volition to go on and continue to where were going through regardless if Jordan was there or not. When the two asked me if I was sure about it, and convincing me about the detour, I mentioned that I had to do it because sooner or later, that moment would arrive whether I like it or not.

“Yeah, I am sure. Let’s go. “

So, I walked ahead of them, and even though, I could sense doubt to both of my friends, I ignored it. I forget to tell you apart from healing someone’s emotions; I could also sense their feelings. It was an additional ability I just learned when Jordan courted me. And until now, I didn’t know into what extent this power could go. So, let’s go back from the situation. I was still preparing myself just in case, Jordan would say something or would literally ask how I was.

My friends walked a little faster to jive on my pace until Jordan saw us from afar. He looked totally fine, and he was a bit shy, that’s something I felt while moving towards him. He gave us smile and we stopped because he asked me and my friends where we will go. At first, I just froze and I even couldn’t move my hands or my tongue or even my feet as they were mounted on the ground. When I was about to open my mouth, I already heard my friend, Roz, answering the question.

“We have an interview for our internship.”

To make everything fair, Roz gave the question back and asked, “What are you doing here.”

I was right when he said that he was waiting for his classmates because they also had an interview for their internship. My gaze was fastened to his face and to his entire being. He looked so stunningly good looking with his coat and tie as if he were already working with his suit and grooming. His face looked so soft, and his captivating eyes which tell a story, and his lips. I missed kissing him so much. I even wanted to hug him and tell him how I want him back. Well, even I didn’t want to, my mind brought me back to the past where I reminisced all the good memories together. And then, when I came back from the reality, Roz was holding my hand, and pushing me to leave the place until he uttered last one question, I presumed.

“How are you Hannah?”

I just wanted to turn my back to his but again; I felt a sudden chill down to my spine. It reminded me about how painful it was, freeing the man you love because he said that you were using your ability unto him. But since, everyone was waiting for my response, I immediately said, “I am fine.” Of course, it was just an automatic response but I didn’t mean it. I was not fine. I was not okay. I didn’t feel fine at all. So, I ran off, real quick.

I went to the nearest wash room just to release the burden inside me. I could not lie to myself, I still love him. I still love Jordan, and I want him back. But the way I saw his face, It felt like he already moved on. My own emotion obstructed my ability to sense his feeling when we were nearer. Maybe it was not really a good time for me to see him, my decision to carry on a while ago was really a bad idea.

“Are you okay?” Roz and Lexy rushed themselves towards me and like loyal friends would do, they consoled me. I saw to their faces how worried they were and eager to help me. Roz even mentioned that if she had the ability I possessed, she would wield it over me for sure. I knew that it was not the moment to feel that way because we’re on our way to the interview and I could not afford to look crone during the interview that’s why I managed to compose myself and told them that we were late to the interview.

****

“So, this is the Heal Your Emotion Psychological Clinic and Services.” Lexy mumbled.

We entered in even if our hearts would like to come out from our chest due to nervousness and anxiety. Though, we had interview simulation at school, and we even practice a lot, the pressure of the real-life experience being interviewed was totally nerve-wracking. I sensed tension, fear and discomfort. Well, at least, I was not alone because we had the same feeling. Well, psychologically speaking, that situation may help us to be alert and active, but if that stress would rise even higher, I could not imagine if we will pass the interview.

“Hannah Feliciano, please follow me.” The secretary instructed.

So, my friends were done and my agony was prolonging. I had some few tips from them, and I thought it could help me during the interview. When I followed the secretary, I heard the beat of my heart and perspiration fell so fast. I was really nervous indeed. When she said that, “Okay, you have to come in and someone was waiting for you”, I even felt more a bit agitated and edgy. I smiled. I sighed. And I went inside.

After a while, the interview was done. And luckily, we’re all hired. We were now officially interns. We thanked the secretary and left the clinic at once.

When we were still in front of the clinic, Roz asked us if we could celebrate that victory as if we won a lottery or we won an international competition. Roxy offered her house to be the venue of our celebration since her parents were out of town due to business purposes. So, that venue was settled but the food was not. So, I believed we would all agree to my suggestion because we were all K-pop fans.

“How about Samgyeopsal Party?”

“Well, that the best idea ever.” Roz said.

“And Soju, of course!” Lexy added.

****

  So, after getting all the things we need for our party at that night. We passed through a bookstore. I told them that there was a book I wanted to buy. So, I asked them to stop by and look for some psychology books or any book that could help us to our internship. While roaming around the store, there was a book which caught my attention and that was “Overcoming Extreme Introversion”. I didn’t know if there were such words as extreme introversion but when I opened the book, it was not really the book I thought it would be. It was like a real story of someone who suffered from extreme introversion. When I spent almost few minutes reading the first few pages, I heard footsteps coming, so I assumed it was my Roz or Lexy, so I said, “this book is really amazing, I didn’t know that there was someone was really suffered from extreme extroversion. It says here that this man had no social interaction and had no social life. Oh, I could not imagine his life.”

When I turned my gaze unto them, I was shocked because I was literally talking not to my friends but to stranger.