2

After changing into my jeans and sweater, I walked to the bleachers, watching the football team’s practice. Jake was in his element whenever he’s in the field. His love for football is the same way I love cheering, and I know the news of me leaving the team for a while will break his heart. The same way it did mine. He gave me a toothy grin and waived like a kid when he saw me. I blew him a kiss and his teammates teased him like they’re children.

Jake is showy of his affection when it comes to me, unlike his previous relationships. Girls were practically falling at his feet. I saw him make out with girls in the hallway, cafeteria, gym, field, and even at classrooms and janitors’ closets. He is practically everywhere with a girl clinging on his neck like a snake. Different girls every week and sometimes, every day.

I don’t approve of what he did, but I also don’t approve of girls allowing themselves to be played by guys knowingly.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not as if we didn’t know each other before we dated. We have the same circle of friends, went to the same party every weekend, the same outing, same table in the cafeteria, same everything. When his friend Chuck asked me out freshman year, Jake practically shoved the guy and went into a WWE SmackDown when he kissed me on the cheeks. I didn’t understand what went on with those two, why they punched each other in the hallway, but when Chuck started chuckling and said, ‘don’t be a pussy, West. Just ask her out already.’ Those were Chuck’s exact words.

Right there and then in the hallway where the wrestling happened, Jake strode towards me with a bloody lip and knuckles. ‘Bobbie’ his teammates were hooting and whistling as he started to speak. ‘Go out with me. I have had eyes on you since first grade and I hate seeing you with anyone.’

He practically told everyone that he liked me ever since, and it was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me, except for my grandparent’s love. He courted me from that day until I agreed to be his girlfriend six months later, the beginning of sophomore year.

“Hey, Bee.” Jake walked to the bleacher where I sat comfortably. His hair was slightly dripping with water from the shower, and he smelled like my Sakura shampoo. He kissed my cheek and guided me to his bike, holding my hands.

Chuck will drive my car to my house while Jake and I have dinner over at his parent’s place. Our families are close. Dating Jake was like tying the perfect bond. My Grandad was the mayor and Jake’s father is the vice.

Esther pulled me in her motherly arms as soon as she saw me walking up their porch. I took too many hugs for the day and I feel like I’m squeezed lemon now.

“How have you been, Bobbie?” now the Mayor, Austin West, gave me a fatherly hug while Esther wiped her tears away.

This is the first time they’re seeing me after the funeral and I can feel my heart clenching. I miss my family and seeing both of them brings back memories of my once happy, complete family. I never had a good relationship with my mother and I came to live with that. She is not part of my family, and the family I know of is gone.

Esther is the best cook next to Nonna. She cooked all my favorite food and I’m so full after dinner, but I have a special place in my tummy for her cupcakes. The three of them were laughing at me while I took my fifth cupcake for the night. My cheeks were heating up, and I lowered my head while Jake’s fingers tilted my chin to look at him.

“Don’t be shy, Bee, I enjoy seeing you eat like me.” That only made his parents laugh sweetly, and I laughed with them this time.

Esther held my hand in hers while the guys watched football, with a bottle of beer on their hands. We just finished cleaning the kitchen and Esther handed me a glass of wine. She was telling me about the year of the wine and how it aged. I knew little about wine because to me; they are all the same. But I listened to her, anyway.

“Bobbie, you can stay with us for a while if you want. Jake will be ecstatic if you do,” she wiggled her perfectly lined brows teasingly.

It was a very enticing offer, and I learned today that having people around me helps me forget grief… for nanoseconds.

“Thank you, but can I think about it?”

“Of course… Of course, take all the time that you need.”

~~

Jake and I were now in my room after he drove me home. I was catching up on my lessons and he was helping me study. I envied Jake for having an excellent memory. He doesn’t have a hard time studying since we were younger while I work my ass off to get straight A’s.

We studied until ten and we’re now having hot chocolate with marshmallows while watching the starry skies. Jake has always loved stargazing, and he knows almost every name of the star there is. He is passionate about the things that he loved just like me. He focuses his one hundred percent on everything, and his tawny eyes are so sexy every time he speaks of the things that he loves.

“Bee?”

“Hmm.”

“I love you,” he whispered into my ears while I shiver.

We’ve been going out for two years, but this is the first time he confessed with the L-word. I lift my head from resting on his shoulders, looking straight into his eyes. He held my hand in his and the blanket that was covering our bodies pool on the plush outdoor couch on my balcony. “I’ve been meaning to say that since your birthday, but after everything, I can’t find the right moment.”

I bit my bottom lip to stop it from trembling, but Jake pulled it down gently with his thumb, caressing it. “You are the most beautiful person I have ever met, Bee, on the outside and the inside. The kindest and the strongest, too. I love you since you were in your pigtails and pink tutu in preschool.”

His words made me giggle, my heart was bursting with happiness. He continued to speak. “I know what you’re going through is hard, but I want to be with you in every step, Baby. I love you with all my egoistic heart.’’

He pulled something from his jeans pocket and handed it to me. It was a velvet box, and he opened it in my hands. A ring with a rose gold band sat proudly on the box’s cushion. Small diamonds flushed around the band, sparkling under the light while Jake took it out of its confines.

Placing the box down, Jake grabbed my hand and looked deep into my eyes.

“I’m not asking you to marry me now, Bee, but I want to, someday. This is my promise to you.” He slid the ring on my right ring finger. “I will always love you, be there for you and make you happy in every way I can.”

My voice was caught in my throat. I can’t utter a word against his sweet confession. I placed my hand on the back of his neck, pulling him for a loving kiss. He responded with equal fervor, if not more. His hands pulled me by my waist, lifting me to straddle him as our kiss deepened.

I was pulling his ash-blond locks while his hand traveled down my spine to cup my bottoms, giving it a gentle squeeze. His hands leaving wildfires in its wake. We have done nothing more than make out, and I’m glad that Jake is so willing to wait for me. I can feel that his patience is wearing off as he groaned in my mouth when I forced my tongue inside his. Tasting every nook of his sweet mouth, but he quickly took control of our kiss.

My hips were grinding on his. I can feel his erection against my core through the thick clothing of our jeans. The sounds coming out of Jake’s mouth were so sweet and made a pool of fiery liquid on my panties.

“Babe,” Jake and I were gasping for air as I rested my forehead against his. His hands rest under my sweater now. “I can wait. We don’t need to rush things between us.”

I pecked his lips “I know, but I’m ready, Jake.” I kissed him again, but his kisses were not as hungry as before.

“I don’t have a condom with me.”

“Oh,” the disappointment is obvious in my voice, but Jake’s chuckle sends a tingly sensation to my entire body.

“I haven’t bought one since we dated, Bee.”

“Why?” I was giggling with him, but I still asked a stupid question.

“Because...” he poked my nose. “You are special to me, Bee. I want our first time to be as special as you are.”

“Special...” I whispered, and Jake’s light laughter only erupted even more.

“Was I too cheesy?” I nod in response, but him saying those words were filling my heart with love. “For you, Baby. Only for you.”

We slept in my room that night cuddling. It was the first night after my birthday where I slept without a nightmare, waking me up in the middle of the night.

It was always the same scenario, Nonna sat on the passenger side of Nonno’s car, and a truck hit them while coming home with my birthday cake on Nonna’s lap. Every year, it has always been their routine that they’d buy birthday cake and favorite food. The three of us celebrate my birthday at home. At midnight, I would open my presents like it was Christmas Eve.

Because of the accident, I might never find a reason to celebrate my birthday anymore.

~~