Sumabog ang malakas na musika sa buong lugar. The blinding strobe lights, bottles of liquor, gyrating bodies, people dancing wildly and drunk people seated on the couches welcomed me. Hindi na kami mag-aalala dahil lahat kaming magkaibigan ay nasa legal na edad na at responsable naman sa mga kilos.
I spotted my friends at the right corner, malapit sa dancefloor. Kumaway si Shane sa akin, doon ko napansin ang dalawa pang lalaking hindi pamilyar sa sa akin na nakikipag-usap sa mga kaibigan ko.
"There she is!" Macy beamed. "Ang hot naman talaga! Nagliliyab ang kagandahan sa malamig na gabi!" She teased. Natawa ako roon at inikutan siya ng mata. Shane whistled playfully.
"Sana all may dede," Giana laughed.
I sat beside Jayle whose busy texting someone. Nakangiti pa at animo'y kinikilig. Siniko ko siya ng bahagya. Lumingon siya sa akin, nangingiti pa sa kausap.
"Oh, hi! Sexy naman!" She beamed. I smiled at her and put my purse at the table. I poured the Jack Daniels on a glass while listening to the girl's conversation.
I glanced at the two guys who's now gawking at me. Malagkit ang tingin ng isa samantalang ang isa naman ay nakatingin lang na parang inoobserbahan ako. I almost roll my eyes at the former whose smirking arrogantly.
"Ay, by the way," Macy spoke. "This is Marcus," tukoy niya sa lalaking seryosong nakatitig sa akin. The man nodded and smiled a bit. I smiled back too, na naging ngiwi na yata nang lumipat ang tingin ko sa isa. "And this is Brent. They are my classmates."
The annoying man grinned at me. "Nice to meet you, beautiful," he said in a rasp voice. I almost scoffed at Shane's little giggles when he spoke. Mukhang type niya pa yata. The man looks fine, though. Pero kagaya lang pala ng kampon ni Del Rosario. Perv and arrogant.
I just nodded coldly and averted my gaze. Giana simply pinched the side of my waist. I flinched a bit and looked at her confusedly.
"Mukhang type ka," nguso niya roon sa mukhang manyak na lalaki. I lazily leaned on the headrest, pinaglalaruan ang ngayo'y hawak na baso ng alak.
"Walang may pake," I said.
She laughed a bit. "Napaka- harsh mo talaga." Napailing siya at sumimsim sa baso.
"Anong balak niyo ngayong bakasiyon? Two months na lang end na ng school year," Jayle said at ibinaba ang shot glass na may lamang vodka, bahagya pang nakangiwi. I never really liked its taste, mabuti siya at nakakaya niya.
"Ako, we're going to US to visit our grandparents." Shane said.
"As usual, pupunta kaming La Vida," tukoy ni Giana sa probinsiya nila. "Annual family reunion," she added.
"Buti pa kayo, may plano. Ako, sa bahay lang. Well, my parents don't want to risk it." Macy shrugged.
Her father is a congressman and her mom is a criminal lawyer, parehong nasa field kung saan uso ang marurumi at madudugong laro. Delikado nga para sa kaniya iyon kaya mas mabuting mag-ingat. Lalo pa at kalat na sa lahat ang balak na pagkandidato ni Tito Sebastian, ang kaniyang ama sa pagka- senador, at si Tita Merrigan na kaniyang ina naman ay may malaking kasong hinahawakan at balita ko'y sindikato ang kalaban niya. Lalong mapipika ang mga kaaway ng kaniyang mga magulang dahil pareho silang kilalang mahusay sa larangan ng politika at abogasya, baka madamay pa silang magkakapatid.
"Ang boring niyan, babe," Jayle commented. "But its for your safety naman. Balita ko mas lalong nagiging aggressive ang mga kaaway niyo. You need to be extra alert and careful."
Macy nodded at that. "Well, I understand naman. I'll just try to be productive everyday siguro, para hindi ako maburyo." She turned to me. "How 'bout you? Anong plano?"
Nagkibit- balikat ako. "Wala akong plano. I'll probably just stay inside the house or...do some things to ease my boredom." I said.
"Things like what?" The annoying guy suddenly interrupted. I almost rolled my eyes but I don't wanna be that harsh so I kept my poker face.
I raised a brow. "Things that should be out of your business," I lazily said. Sinaway ako ni Shane habang ang iba kong kaibigan ay nagpipigil ng tawa. Si Giana ay nakisegunda pa sa pagsaway pero natatawa naman.
Ang isang lalaki ay nangingiti pero nanatiling tahimik. He's kind of fine than this cocky creature. Pormal at mukhang marespeto kaysa sa kasama.
Jayle laughed a bit. "Sorry sa kaibigan namin. She's just like that," she added. The man smirked.
"No, it's fine." He said.
Hindi ko na lang siya pinansin at inabala ang sarili sa pagsi-cellphone.
Umalis ang dalawang lalaki kalaunan. Anila ay maaga ang lakad sa kung ano. The annoying man even had the guts to wink at me before leaving. Napangiwi na lang ako roon.
My friends became louder as the time passes by. Lumalalim na ang gabi, ganoon di ang pagdagsa ng mga tao sa lugar. The party is at its peak. Sobrang lakas na ng tugtugin at lalong nagkakagulo sa pagsasayaw at katuwaan.
Meanwhile, I am feeling nauseous. Aminado akong hindi malakas uminom. My friends have high alcohol tolerance samantalang ako ay hindi pa yata nakakalimang shot ay nahihilo at lupaypay na.
"Guys! Tara dali!" Si Shane na mukhang kagagaling lang kung saan. She looks wasted now, halatang marami na ang nainom pero kaya pa ring tumayo ng maayos.
"Why?" The sleepy Giana asked. Namumungay ang mga matang bumaling sa kaibigan. I looked at her with my blurred vision. Jayle yawned and rested her head on my shoulder.
"I think I saw someone," her eyes darted at Macy na ngayo'y nasa ere na ang inumin, natigilan nang makita ang mapanuyang tingin ni Giana.
"What?" Macy asked. Giana grinned and put her palm on her cheeks, umaaktong kinikilig.
"The bartender!" She giggled. The sleepy Jayle shifted on her stance snappily.
"Eh? Saan?" She asked curiously.
"Omg! Kaya naman pala binabalikan ni Maxima! Super hot!" Pinapaypayan pa ni Shane ang sarili, mukhang interesado talaga roon sa sinasabing bartender.
"Weh? Tara nga, tignan natin," ani Giana.
"Stop it!" Impit niyang saway. The four stood, ready to confirm the news. Sumunod ang bahagya pang gumigewang na si Macy sa kanila. "Don't do anything stupid! Nakakahiya sa tao!" I heard her yell.
It took me a little while to realize that I am all alone and very dizzy. My eyes are almost dropping, umaalon ang pakiramdam at nasusuka. I want to go home and sleep.
Sa mga ganitong sitwasiyon, hindi ako umiinom ng mahigit sa dalawang baso ng alak dahil alam kong mahina ako sa bagay na iyon. Ngayon lang ako nakainom ng marami. I stood up and walked sluggishly. I am a bit slurry but I managed to walk my way to the restroom. Walang katao-tao sa loob noon nang makarating ako. I leaned my head against the cold wall. Mainit ang aking pakiramdam at nahihilo pa. It took me minutes to compose myself and freshen up. Medyo umayos na ang aking pakiramdam matapos makapagsuka at maghilamos. Bahagyang nabawasan ang pagkahilo ko bagama't namimigat na ang mga mata. On my way to our table, my phone rang. Dad's name flashed on it. It's already 1 am so its very unusual for him to call this late, I think it's important. Pahirapan man ay mabilis akong nakalabas sa bar at sinagot ang tawag. Namuo ang pawis sa aking noo at leeg dahil sa pakikipagsiksikan sa mga tao. "Dad," I called. "It's late. Something wrong?" He sighed tiredly. "Nothing, hija. Nasaan ka?" "I'm
Ilang sandali pa ay kumalma na ako ngunit nanatili kami sa ganoong posisyon. No one dared to move nor speak. I find the moment calming and peaceful, na para bang matagal na kaming ganito sa isa't isa kahit na ang totoo, mula noong high school ay ngayon lang kami naging ganito kalapit sa isa't isa. His heartbeat is calm but his breathing is heavy. I felt the urge to bury my face in his chest but I stopped myself. I don't think it's right, given our past encounters at school. We're not even friends. He sighed and hugged me more. "Feeling better now?" He asked. I nodded. Bahagya akong kumalas sa kaniyang yakap, hinayaan niya akong makawala. Inayos ko ang aking suot na dress. Pinulot niya ang nahulog kong purse at inabot sa akin. Hinanap ko rito ang aking scrunchies para masikop ang magulong buhok. Nanonood lang si Forth sa aking ginagawa. Nahirapan akong sikupin ang buhok dahil sa hawak na purse. I tried but I fail eventually. Itinigil ko na lang iyon. Hinayaan ko na lang na ganoon an
He drove away from our house at 3 am. Halos nahuhulog na ang aking mga mata sa antok at pagod, at ganoon din siya. He looked tired and sleepy. I texted my friends the next day. I said sorry for leaving without a word. Nag alala ang mga ito dahil bigla na lang akong nawala. Nagdahilan na lang ako na nagpasundo dahil inaantok na, pinili kong ilihim ang nangyari. The next days passed like a whirlwind. Simula noong nangyari sa bar, medyo umayos ang pakiramdam ko sa presensiya ni Forth. Tuwing nagkakasalubong kami sa school, nagagawa ko na siyang ngitian bilang pagbati. Hindi tulad ng dati na iwas na iwas akong mapadapo ang tingin ko sa kaniya. "I'll be leaving next month," Jayle pouted sadly. Nandito kami sa cafeteria para sa lunchbreak. Kaming dalawa lang dahil may klase pa ang iba. Giana is a stem student, si Shane ay may cooking class at si Macy ay humms. Kaming dalawa ni Jayle ay abm, kaya minsan lang talaga na makumpleto kami dahil abala rin ang ibang kaibigan sa ginagawa. I sigh
The lightness I am feeling from the scene earlier was shortlived as I settled on my seat during dinner, feeling the uncomfortable silence with my parents. I can sense that something is going on between them and I can't help but observe them. I looked at my Mom who looks stressed and tired. She is focused on her food. Then my gaze turned to my dad who looks worn out. I can really sense that something is off between my parents. Dati naman nang tahimik ang hapag namin pero hindi ganito kabigat ang atmospera. "Mommy," I called softly. She looked at me and raised a brow, her gaze softened a bit while looking at me. "Are you both alright po? You both look tired," I asked. I know it is not good to talk about this in front of the food but I can't help it. Maybe...they're too stressed about work? She smiled a bit. "I'm fine, Selene. We're just tired from...work," she said and focused on her food again. Meanwhile, I am not convinced. It seems like there is something else but I don't want t
Nakalipas ang ilang sandali at hindi na siya nagreply. Sampung minuto na at wala pa rin siyang tugon. Gusto kong batukan ang sarili dahil para akong tangang nakaabang sa reply niya. Napaismid ako at sumandal sa headboard ng kama at tumitig sa kisame. Napapitlag ako ng tumunog ang phone ko para sa isang tawag. Thinking it was one of my friends or some unknown people, I answered it. "What?" I asked coldly. I am not really in the mood to entertain someone. I can't believe I am being like this just because I didn't get a reply! The other line remained silent. I looked at my phone. The line is still connected. My forehead creased because the number is unregistered. "Who's this? Don't waste my time please." I was about to hang up when I heard a husky chuckle on the other line. My lips thinned. I know who it is. "Hi. Sorry, are you busy?" "Yes," I breathed. "I am busy. Don't call or text me. I'm doing something." malamig kong sabi. He sighed. "I'm...actually outside your house,"
Bagsak ang katawan ko pagkapasok at nakatulog kaagad. Nabasa ko lang ang mga mensahe niya nang magising ako, informing me that he got home. Nakita kong may bago siyang mensahe kaninang alas otso lang ng umaga and it is already ten in the morning. Forth: Good morning. Forth: I guess you're still sleeping. Don't forget to eat breakfast when you wake up. Napangiti ako roon. Bumangon ako sa pagkakahiga at sinuklay ang buhok gamit ang daliri. Me: Good morning. Kakagising ko lang. Naligo muna ako at nagbihis bago bumaba para kumain. Natigilan pa ako ng makita ang mga pinsan ko na nasa living room. They are my cousins from Daddy's side. Anila ay pupunta kami sa bahay ng aming lolo at lola sa Batangas. Kanina pa pala naghihintay ang mga iyon sa akin at kanina pa ako kinakatok sa kuwarto. Biglaan lang daw at tumawag si lolo at nakiusap na bisitahin sila. Sumama ang mga babae kong pinsan sa pag-akyat ko. Halos magdugo na lang ang tenga ko sa ingay nila. Si Shanaiah lang ang hindi masy
Ilang saglit akong naghintay ng tawag niya. Malapit ko nang hambalusin si Mon ng hawak kong unan dahil napapakapit pa ito ng parang tuko pero buti na lang ay nag-ring ang cellphone ko. Kinuha ko ang unan sa tabi ni Desmond saka dire-diretsong pumanhik sa taas. Mukhang hindi naman ako napansin ng mga pinsan dahil abala sila sa panonood. For some reason, I felt excited about something like a kid that was brought in an amusement park for the first time. I went inside our room and slumped on the bed. "Hello," panimula ko at tumitig sa kisame. "Hi, Ma'am. Are you going to sleep now?" "Not yet. Nagmomovie marathon kami." I replied. "With your cousins?" Tumango ako kahit hindi niya nakikita. "Yeah." Ilang sandali kaming natahimik. Tanging mabigat niyang paghinga ang naririnig ko sa kabilang linya. The silence is not awkward, though. It's comforting and peaceful, even. "You still there? Bakit ang tahimik riyan? Where are you?" he suddenly asked. May narinig akong kaluskos sa kabi
Napapansin ko ang madalang na pag-uwi ni Dad. Madalas ay parehas silang wala, minsan pa kapag umuuwi ay nagtatalo sila ni Mommy. Thinking it was just some business matters, I didn't let it get through me. Sa mga araw na lumipas ay mas lalo kaming nagkalapit ni Forth. There were times that we'll go out to eat, have road trips at midnight, shop for things, and watch movies. Those memories are all just simple but happy. "Aren't you sleepy yet? Pwede namang next time na lang tayo pumunta roon," Forth said while his eyes are on the road. From gazing outside his car's window, I turned to him and I was welcomed by his breath-taking side profile. The city lights illuminated his beautiful eyes and his aristocratic nose and prominent jaw are kissed by the darkness, giving it a manly shadow. "Hindi pa naman ako inaantok. Sanay akong hindi matulog mg maaga dahil nanonood ako ng series sa n*****x," I said and stared at him more, adoring one of the Creator's masterpiece. "How about your pa
Trigger Warning: ViolenceWakas"So...are you coming home tonight?" my brother, Frand, asked and sat on the couch in front of me with a glass of liquor on his hand.I leaned on my swivel chair. Ibinaba ko ang dokumentong binabasa at sinulyapan ang nakakatandang kapatid. Ilang beses na itong pabalik-balik sa aking opisina ngayong araw para kulitin akong umuwi ngayon. It's lola's 85th birthday and we are having a family dinner. Ayos lang naman na hindi ako pumunta dahil binisita ko na si lola kahapon. We had an early celebration on her favorite restaurant yesterday so I think she'll understand if I won't come.Kaso ang mga kapatid ko, ayaw tumigil. Palagi na lang, tuwing may okasyon ay pinagtutulungan nila akong pauwiin. They've been teaming up against me for the past years just to make me come home. Hindi na rin kasi ako umuwi simula no'ng naging abala na sa mga hawak na negosyo."I'm busy," sagot ko.Matalim niya akong tiningnan ngunit sa huli ay bumuntong-hininga. "Kinukulit ako ni M
Naalimpungatan ako sa pagtama ng nakakasilaw na liwanag mula sa bintana. I opened my eyes slowly. Mula sa puting kurtinang hinihipan ng hangin ay inilipat ko ang paningin sa aking tabi.No one was there. Siguro'y nasa labas na ang mag-ama ko. Ngumuso ako at dahan-dahang bumangon. Forth slept here with us last night. It was a long day for us kaya't agad kaming nakatulog. Ngunit himalang nauna pa siyang magising sa akin.Inayos ko ang sarili saka bumaba. Naabutan ko si Carson na nakatungtong sa monoblock chair habang abala sa pagbabati ng itlog. While Forth is topless while cooking something.Saglit akong napatulala. His hair is messy but he still look hot as hell. His thin stubble made him look rough and more intimidating. Ang mga labi'y pula at medyo nakaawang habang nakikinig sa sinasabi ng anak. He laughed a bit at what our son said, revealing his set of perfect whites.Even with the way he laughs, hindi ka mapapanatag. Akala mo'y isang guwapong diablong natutuwa sa kung ano. His sm
"How did you know?" kinakabahan kong tanong habang siya'y nagmamaneho papunta sa aming bahay. "I had you investigated before I come here," tipid niyang sagot.I almost forgot that he's damn rich now. Kaya marami na rin siyang koneksyon at hindi malabong napaimbestigahan na ako nito!"God knows how I wanted to drag you both with me the moment I found out we have a son," aniya. "Ang nagpipigil lang sa akin ay ang kaalamang galit ka sa akin. That's why I gave you time first."I looked at him guiltily. No traces of anger can be seen on his face. In fact, he looked...peaceful. But then, hindi ba siya galit na itinago ko ang totoo?"Hindi ka...uhm, galit?" nag-aalangan kong tanong."Why would I be? You struggled to raise him alone when I should've been there for you both. Dapat kayo ang galit sa akin, Selene."Parang may humawak sa aking puso sa sinabi niya. I smiled weakly at him."Stop blaming yourself on things you have no control of," I said. "At hindi kami galit sayo. Ang totoo, gusto
I was very devasted when everything I have fell apart back then. I used to think that nothing hurts more than what I went through in the past.It was nightmare. But knowing that someone laid his life on the line just to save me from a bigger and more miserable nightmare is a different kind of pain. He didn't have to do it. Hindi niya kailangang makialam. I refuse to accept how his love for me lead him to do stupid things.His father is a leader of a syndicate. It was given that he is dangerous. But he played his father's dirty game and betrayed him just so he can save me. Ganoon niya ba ako kamahal...para isugal ang buhay niya maprotektahan lamang ako? I couldn't accept it. It was too painful. Paano kung hindi siya nakaligtas sa pagkaka-coma? Paniguradong habang-buhay akong lulubog sa pagsisisi at sakit!Tulala ako habang nakaupo sa gutter sa labas ng restaurant. Nasa loob pa ng restaurant ang tatlo at ako lamang ang lumabas para magpahangin. At sa totoo lang, wala akong mukhang mai
Siya rin ang naghatid sa akin pauwi noong gabing iyon. Hindi ko na mahanap sina Kelmer sa bar kaya nauna na ako. I just texted them that I already went home, and that I couldn't find them anywhere."Blooming, ah!" salubong sa akin ni Daisy nang makapasok ako ng restaurant kinabukasan. "Baka naman nakahanap ka ng lalaki do'n sa bar kaya ganyan ha," ngumisi siya. Napairap ako. "Hindi ba pwedeng maganda lang ang gising?" balik ko. "Sus!" dinunggol niya ang balikat ko. "Sige, kunwari hindi ko alam na nagkakamabutihan kayo ni Sir pogi. Ang sweet at may paghatid-sundo pa plus bantay na bantay all day! Nabawasan na nga ang customer nating mga babae simula nong nagkalapit kayo niyan. Baka siya ang kasama mo kagabi. Naku ha!"Ngumiwi ako. Hindi na lamang ako nagsalita at dumiretso na sa staff room para magbihis ng uniform. Paglabas ko'y natanaw ko si Forth sa palagi niyang pwesto. He is looking on his laptop while he is holding a phone on his ear, seryosong nakikipag-usap sa kung sino. Lum
"When is your graduation?" Forth asked while he's still driving. Mula sa bintana ay inilipat ko ang tingin sa kaniya.His side profile welcomed my sight. Saglit akong napatulala roon. I already knew that he's handsome when we were still young but I never thought he could be this hot now. "Next week. Why?"His jaw moved slightly. "I was thinking if I could attend. If that's fine with you, of course."Natigilan ako roon.Hindi ko alam ang isasagot ko. Hindi ko masabing hindi pwede dahil siguradong magkikita sila ni Carson roon. "Uh... I'll see," nag-aalangan kong sagot.Tumango siya. We stayed silent until we reached the restaurant. Tahimik siyang bumaba at umikot para pagbuksan ako. I bit my lower lip and got out of the car. Hindi pa rin siya nagsasalita.I held his arm to stop him from walking. His lips parted as he stared at me."Uhm, galit k-ka?" nag-aalangan kong tanong.Kumunot ang noo niya, nagtataka. "Why would I be mad?""Kasi...uh...hindi ako pumayag agad na sumama ka sa gr
It was as if I was dreaming. Sobrang gaan ng pakiramdam ko matapos kong umiyak. It's like all the burden was lifted out of my chest.I sighed and leaned on Forth's chest more. Nasa loob na kami ng kotse niya, parehong tahimik na pinapakiramdaman ang isa't isa habang nakaupo ako sa kaniyang kandungan at nakahilig sa kaniyang dibdib. He was caressing my hair.Everything is still fresh to me. Masyadong mabilis ang mga pangyayari. Marami rin akong tanong na ilang taon nang hindi nabibigyan ng kasagutan kaya nag-uunahan sa aking utak ngayon."Forth," I called softly."Hmm?""Nung gabing lasing na lasing ka," panimula ko. "Kent called me and asked for help para pauwiin ka. Kaso noong nasa bar na ako, sinabi niyang nakauwi ka na kaya dumiretso ako sa condo mo..." I stopped for a while. I still remember what I felt that day. I was so broken when I saw him being kissed by a random girl on his bedroom. That was one of the most painful memories of the past. Until now, I am still bothered.Ramda
Umihip ang malamig na hangin ng makalabas ako sa restaurant. Kakatapos lang ng shift ko at pauwi na sa bahay. Dala ko pa ang paperbag ng pagkain na binili ni Forth para sa akin kanina. I rolled my eyes. Kahit bitter ako, hindi ako magsasayang ng pagkain. I'm tired giving it to my workmates, too. Kaya tinatanggap ko na lang at pinapakain kay Carson. I stopped on my tracks when I saw Forth's familiar car again. He was leaning on it as if he's waiting for someone. Nang makita ako ay umayos siya ng tayo. Nagpatuloy ako sa paglalakad, halos tumakbo na. Ramdam kong nakasunod siya sa likuran ko kaya mas lalo kong binilisan ang lakad ko. "Cary," he called. I didn't stop walking. Hindi ko rin siya nilingon. Tuloy tuloy ang lakad ko. "Cary, please. Slow down. I want to talk to you--" "I don't. Stop following me," I cut him off. I don't even know why I'm acting this way. Hindi ko maintindihan ang sarili sa biglang pagbuso ng galit sa sistema ko. It's like something is triggering me, push
Inilapag ko ang tray ng order ni Forth sa kaniyang mesa. I can feel his eyes on me but I refused to give him a single glance. Patuloy lamang ako tahimik na paglagay ng mga order niya. Ilalapag ko na sana ang paper bag na naglalaman ng kaniyang take out nang magsalita siya. "That's yours." Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay. "I said I already ate." "Then eat it on your break, or when you're hungry again," he shrugged like it was not a big deal and started eating his food. "Masasayang lang 'to. Hindi naman ako gutom." "Then bring it at home." Napairap ako at padabog na kinuha ang tray at paperbag saka umalis roon. Nakasalubong ko pa si Lorie na mukhang kakatapos lang mag-serve sa kabilang mesa. She smiled when she saw me. An idea lit on my mind. I glanced at the paperbag I'm holding. "Naglunch ka na?" tanong ko. "Magla-lunch pa lang. Busy eh. Bakit?" "Sa'yo na lang, oh," inabot ko ang supot sa kaniya. "May customer na nakalimutan iyong take out niya. Sayang naman." "Sure ka?" Tumango