His little fairy

Jiang Longwei dreamed of his life; his parents had an arranged marriage. They only married each other for their business alliance.

They never held any special feelings towards each other. He was born because of their drunken mistake, because of which they never wanted to get close to this mistake.

At first, he wanted their affection and attention very much, he tried to do every thing to get them to like him.

He was very smart since he was a child, he studied diligently and behaved like a obedient child.

But it was all for naught, he was still left alone at the big mansion in the care of the servants.

He always felt cold and extremely alone, whenever he fell ill there was no one to care for him.

Whenever he fell of the stairs there was no one to sooth his pain, he would always get up and walk again like nothing happened.

When he would go out and watch the children of his age being held by their parents and laughing like they had whole world he felt envious of them.

Gradually his world began to become dark and cold like how he felt from inside.

He thought if they don’t love him, he also doesn’t want them either. He was already isolated from the world, alone and emotionless.

He lost all the hope of ever being loved by anyone, or ever feeling the warmth and care like other children his age.

When he was seven years old his mother got pregnant again and after nine months, she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl.

But she died at the time of giving birth, he was the only one who was present at the hospital.

His father was accompanying his little lover and their daughter. He thought his mother was very pitiful, even when she died her husband was not with her.

            For the first time he felt that the world was very cruel, very harsh.

            He was crying on her deathbed when he heard a child crying, he looked around and saw that it was his newly born little sister that was making such loud noise.

            He felt irritated for some reason, he walked towards her baby cot. He didn’t know how he should stop her, but when he finally saw her little face, he felt like flowers were blooming in front of him.

            He awkwardly tried to pick her up, she was very light he thought he needed to fatten her so that she will gain some weight.

            For the first time he felt hope for the future, he felt that there was some warmth in his cold and empty life.

            He held his mother’s funeral with his baby sister, there were only servants accompanying him but that day he didn’t feel lonely cause she was there with him.

            He was very smart he learned how to take care of babies, and took care of his sunshine himself.

             He bathed her, fed her milk changed her clothes. Whenever she would cry, he will sing a lullaby for her.

            Whenever she would laugh looking at him, he felt like he had the whole world. He would do anything for this little sister for her to smile.

            He never felt that he was envious of others afterwards because, he also had someone who accompanied him, and made his life worth living.

            Time went by slowly, she started to grow up and became more and more beautiful. He loved her more and more.

            Of course, she was the most beautiful little lady for him, she also clung to him like a tail.

She would only eat when he fed her, wear the clothes he personally chose for her. She would make little mischiefs and then laugh when her stupid Gege would get caught in her play.

He knew all her plays but he still played along with her only to see her smile like blooming roses.

They were really happy together till that day, when she had her first period.

She came crying to him telling him how much her stomach hurt’s, he felt distressed for her.

After that day she began to change, from a lovely little lady to charming beautiful woman.

And that was how he began to notice her not as a sister but as a woman, he began to fantasize her as a lover.

He realized it when it was too late, the seeds of love had already sprouted and became a big tree.

A tree that destroyed their happy little family, because he knew his love for her was against the rules of this world.

He was never a kind of person who cared about world, but he cared for her.

He couldn’t become a devil and shatter her angel like innocence, how could he possibly destroy that little fairy who was his whole world?

So, he started to alienate himself from her, it hurt him to be apart from her. But he had to maintain their distance so as the beast inside him will not pounce on her and eat her.

He didn’t want to make her regret ever loving him as a brother, and he didn’t want to destroy her innocence.

She was such an innocent and pure child he couldn’t taint her with his dirty thoughts, what if she hates him? What if she feels disgusted by his love for her?

So, he hid his love for her, made a mask of himself as the world’s best gentle and caring brother. But only he knew what he was inside, he coveted the body of his own little sister every night.

He wanted to held her, kiss those pink petals and make her moan beneath him till she was exhausted. He was such a devil hell and she was the fairy of heaven.

Finally, when she was twenty-one, he personally chose a successful handsome man as her husband, he made sure that man would love her enough for the lifetime.

Only he knew how much hatred he felt towards that man who was going to get what he himself wanted the most. He felt like he must be the most unfortunate man on earth to personally wed his beloved to someone else.

She was happy when she married him, or so I thought. I thought that I was the only one who had those feelings, but he was wrong.

Marrying her to him was the biggest mistake of his life and his worst nightmare. He only wanted for her to be happy and be the most fortunate women on earth.