Thirty

The ride back home was more than awkward, because the three words spoken out loud in the forest lingered between us, and it made both of us so uneasy and unsure of ourselves. I didn't know what to say or what to make of the situation.

Our day away from school had finally come to an end. Neither one of us spoke anything on the car ride back home. 

What do you say to your boyfriend of one day, who had told you that he loves you, while the both of you were in a compromising position? The compromising position was him completely naked and me being completely wrapped in his arms, after sharing one of the most amazing kisses one could ever experience in one's lifetime.

My heart had stopped for a minute when I heard those words and I was panicking inside. It was way too early to say those words, mate bond be damned. 

I didn't know what to say after that, because I couldn't bring myself to say the same three words back to him. I couldn't say those words to him, because I didn't love him. At least, not yet. And I was damn sure about it.

I immediately got out of his grip, all the while reminding myself again and again, to not look down and see Harper's nakedness in full force. I nervously tucked my brown hair behind my ear and turned around, so I was facing the forest and not Harper. I just couldn't bear to look him in his green eyes just yet. 

He had hastily dressed up and we made our way back to his car without speaking a word to each other, our hands hanging limply by our side.

I wonder if I could have handled the situation in a better way because the silence in the car was now unbearable, opposite to how we were an hour ago.

I was dying to know what was going on in Harper's mind. Did he regret saying those three words to me after the way I reacted? I could see his posture was tense and his body had a sort of aloofness to it. 

"Um, Harper?" I said meekly.

Harper instantly glanced my way, his eyes flitting back to the road in front of him in a matter of seconds. "Hm?" 

"Do you regret telling me you love me?" I asked him. My voice came out small and I realized I was unsure of myself. I had no idea what answer I expected of him. Heck, I had no idea what kind of answer I wanted from him.

Harper's eyebrows furrowed in confusion, as if he didn't expect my question and I was wondering if I had spoken totally out of context. He glanced my way steered the car and took a left turn on the road.

"Why would I regret saying it?" Harper asked me.

"I don't know." I shrugged my shoulders in a nervous gesture.

Harper smiled genially at me. "I don't regret telling you that I love you, because it's the truth. I do, I think I realized it even before I said those words out loud." His eyebrows furrowed again. He seemed to do that a lot and I resisted the urge to lean closer to him and smooth it out. "But I can see the words have shaken you up." Harper chuckled; he was trying to defuse the tension between us. "I should have, maybe, told you that after a few days or weeks, after you would have gotten used to me and our, um, relationship."

I nodded, silently agreeing with him and thankful that he didn't regret loving me or expressing his feelings.

I mustered up some dormant courage within me and gingerly put my hand over his, the one which was casually resting on his thigh. Sparks shot up my arm and I heard Harper suck in a deep breath when our skin came in contact. I could see his shoulders immediately relax from the corner of my eyes. I felt peace settle in my gut and I smiled at the sensation.

Harper looked at me for a moment, his green eyes staring intently into my blue ones. Harper's lips broke into a wide grin and I couldn't help but smile at him. He brought our joined hands to his lips and planted an open-mouthed kiss on my knuckles. A shudder of pleasure ran down my spine and my eyes closed on their own. I could feel Harper's lips morph into a smirk at my reaction. 

My cheeks flamed and I tugged at my hand in a vain attempt to rid my hand of the stronghold of Harper's hand. His grip tightened and he gently put both our hands in my lap, all the while stroking my knuckles with his thumb.

I always thought that this simple action was so overrated in movies and novels when the hero draws some lazy circles on the girl's palm or knuckles, but after experiencing it, I could say that it's underrated. The touch, though innocent, was enough to bind us together in a way and I felt happiness blossom within me.

"So, we’re, ok?" I asked him, now sure of myself and happy with the way things turned out.

"Definitely". Harper nodded and gave me a breathtaking smile.

I turned to look out the window and immediately realized where we were. I had thought Harper would drop me at home, as we had planned, but we were in a different part of the town. The car stopped in front of a house and my head snapped to look at Harper's sheepish face.

"Oh my god, you didn't," I said, but I knew, he did. He did.

The street seemed so familiar to me because I have had countless sleepovers in the same house standing before me. Natalie's house loomed in front of me and my heart clenched involuntarily at the remainder of the betrayal I had gone through.

"Why are we here?" I asked Harper. I just hoped my voice came out strong and not how I felt at the moment.

Harper's expression softened. "You need to talk to them, you know. They had no choice. No wolf is supposed to confide in a human about our true nature if they are not mates. It's one of our strongest laws."

It must have been so easy for Harper to say all that. I wanted to ask him if he ever had suffered through such a big betrayal by his best friend or anyone else close to him. Probably not. He could have just used his alpha power and forced the person to tell him the truth.

I just couldn't bring myself to forgive my best friends. Best friends don't lie to each other, but mine hid such a big fact from me. A fact that surrounded their whole existence. Did they not trust me enough that I would keep their secret to myself? Or did they not find it important to tell me? Were they ever going to tell me that they werewolves if I hadn't been Harper's mate or any other werewolf's mate? Probably not. And that hurts me more.

The fact that they would have never told me such an important fact about them, where I struggle to keep every little thing from them. I would die of guilt if I hid something from Natalie and Samantha.

Harper would never understand what I had been going through these past few days, ever since I had come to know about werewolves and that my best friends were wolves too. These three days felt like an eternity to me because my life had suddenly taken a supernatural change and I had no one to share my troubles with. At the time I needed my best friends, I didn't want them to be near me.

We got out of the car and I took a good look at the building standing in front of me. Natalie's house had never looked so threatening to me before. It was probably the second time that I didn't want to go inside that mansion, the first time being, when Nat had picked me up from the bakery and Harper was here, waiting for me and I had told him all about my dreams.

I felt Harper's hand slip into mine and immediately I felt warmth flood into my gut. I looked up to see him already looking at me with a smile on my face.

"I don't want to do it." My voice came out small and hesitant but I didn't care about it one bit. I was hurt so much by both of my best friends and I was in no position to face them right now. 

Harper squeezed my hand softly and gave me a small smile. "Don't you miss them?"

I do miss them, I do. What I don't know is if my knowing their secret, somehow changed things. Were the moments we shared before going to change now that I knew much more than a normal human should know?!

I nodded in response to Harper's question. 

"You have to do this, Zara. Or you will kill one of the best things you have going on in your life right now."

"Was it your idea or was it theirs?" I asked.

"It was mine. I mind-linked both of them to come here as soon as possible." Harper looked at me nervously and hastily added. "Not that they didn't want to talk to you and apologize." 

I chuckled. I knew that they wanted to talk to me. They kept sending me so many messages and voicemails that I often had to keep my phone turned off. I didn't have enough willpower to listen to any one of their messages so I just deleted them.

Being at school was worse. I didn't want to hide from them and neither did I want to talk. The classes went by smoothly and I just changed my usual seat in every class I had shared with them.

The lunch hour was the worst. Harper and Aiden desperately tried to get me to talk to them but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I didn't even have it in me to see their hurtful and disappointing faces so I just finished my lunch early and spent the rest of the time in the library or an empty classroom.

It was weird that now, just because of Harper, just because of my boyfriend's support I was going to do the very thing I had been running from. How things change!

I squeezed Harper's hand; it was more for my comfort than his. I just needed to remind myself that everything was going to be alright.

Both of us walked to Nat's front door and knocked on the lavish wooden door. The door immediately opened and two pairs of arms instantly grabbed me. 

My grip on Harper's loosened and amid all the commotion, I stumbled backward and had to let go of his hand. I instantly missed the warm cocoon his hand had provided my entire body.

Natalie and Samantha had me gripped so tight that I found it hard to breathe. I heard a deep growl come from somewhere and the grip on my body immediately loosened and both of them stood back as if I had shocked them.

Harper stood protectively before me, his body in an attacking stance, warning both of my friends to be careful. I sighed. 

I wasn't going to die of asphyxiation anytime soon. Harper and his overprotective tendencies.

It felt like I was seeing both of them after so much time. Like, seeing them. They both looked so gaunt and there was a sense of loneliness around them both. Call me weird, but I will call it like I see it.

I could see that they hadn't slept in days and they were nervously fidgeting in front of me. Natalie had never fidgeted in her life and Samantha had never looked so lifeless.

I think I was more afraid of the fact that they wouldn't want to be my friends than now I knew about them. I wondered if our friendship was even real because they never told me such an important secret about them. And I was scared that I would lose them. 

But seeing them like this now, without their guards down and my heart open, I knew that they were scared too. Scared of losing me and my friendship. A proof that whatever we had was real. 

That realization brought a smile to my face and I guess both of them noticed it because their faces lit up after seeing my smile. 

The three of us knew that everything between us was alright.

I was immediately engulfed in a group once again and I reveled in the fact that these two amazing girls in front of me were my best friends and although they hid something from me, it wasn't in their power to do so. They were just caught up in the rules and regulations of their world.

As soon as we disentangled ourselves from each other, Harper came to stand by my side and took my hand in his own.  

Both Nat's and Sam's eyes zeroed in on the action and they looked up to me to confirm their theory. I nodded while giving a wide toothy grin at them.

"Well, it's about time." Natalie mockingly rolled her eyes and smiled at me.

"Oh, guys you look so good together." Samantha gushed and looked at the both of us. 

"You're going to be our future Luna." She squealed again and I felt my body stiffen at the realization and the huge burden the title carried.

Harper squeezed my hand in reassurance, silently telling me that he was going to be there for me, every step of the way.

I looked up to meet his eyes and blushed profusely when I noticed how dark they had gone.

All was right in my world.

"That reminds me, I would like you to meet with my parents tomorrow." My head whipped up to meet Harper's gaze, just to make sure that I heard him correctly.

"What, no!" I furiously shook my head at him. No way, I wasn't going to meet his parents. I had just started dating them, it was way too soon.

"You aren't going to meet the parents of your boyfriend," Samantha spoke.

"You're going to meet with the alpha and Luna of the pack you are going to lead in the future," Natalie said.

"They want to meet my mate as soon as possible," Harper said, trying to convince me. He gulped nervously. "They're pretty excited."

I just nodded my head. Will there ever be any peaceful moment from now on? 

Probably not.