A

As a feminist, marrying someone you were forced to or being an exchange for money or power was something I swore never to do.

I had set my standards to be one woman that men will crave but never get.

But today,I was going to break them all.

I was going to change everything I had ever built and suffered for years.

I took a deep breath in and released it as I stared at myself on the mirror.

I didn't have a choice.

I had to do this for my father.

My dad was into dirty businesses and they started backfiring at him and it's not only affecting him but he says he feels like his enemies are going to come for me too .

I tried to convince him that nothing would happen to me and that I'm a strong woman and that I don't need protection, but he insists.

Few weeks after my convocation from college he calls me to come home for an emergency and he says that I must get married immediately.

I laughed and told him that it is not in my list of things to do presently to get married and he pleads with me, he tells me his enemies are coming for me and the only way to protect me is for them is for me to get married.

Now things would have been better if he had asked me to find myself a husband, maybe I would have found some guys that use to hit on me back then in college and strike a deal to pretend to be my husband, because I seriously do not understand how he thinks a man would save me from My enemies.

But then he dropped the bombshell.

He wants me to get married to one of his notorious gangster friend -Amber Matthew.

Amber Mattew was the most dangerous and feared gangsters in the country and even in the continent. He's known as the "Don" and he's as brutal as hell and everyone fears him.

I haven't actually seen him before, but the rumors have it that he could kill even without breathing and he controls even the government.

He was bastard rich and people fear him even more than the president.

And somehow, my father has been able to successfully make this man think of marrying me just so he could protect me from my enemies.

Now that alone will make him feel like I'm dependent on him and I don't like it because he'll make it look like I can't live without him.

Disgusting.

Every Gangster...every Don...every Mafian... they all disgust me.

Sometimes I hate my father for getting involved in all this because this was the same way my mother died, she was poisoned by my father's enemies.

And he begged me to please accept to marry Amber because he doesn't want to loose me too.

And he said he wished he had chosen the right path...but now it's too late.

And that is how I found myself standing in front of this mirror in my wedding dress.

I never spoke to or met Amber even after accepting the proposal.

But my father assured me that he wasn't looking like a troll and he was 3 years older than me.

I felt reassuring hands on my shoulder.

"You look so beautiful", My best friend Samantha said standing beside me.

I forced a smile.

"Not actually how I expected my wedding day to be but yeah...I can manage", I said.

She chuckled.

"You should be happy, you're marrying the most influential man in the continent", she said.

I scrunched my face disgusted.

"And who told you I wanted to live by the honor of another man's name or achievements? ", I said not so excited.

She patted my shoulder.

"Just be careful okay? he's a very dangerous man", She said giving me a sad smile.

"I'm not afraid of a mortal like me, he can't do nothing to me, and if it gets too bad, I'll just leave and allow myself get killed by my father's enemies than be that woman that died in her "Husband's" house", I said unafraid.

She chuckled.

"Okay her Majesty ", she said laughing as she finished up with my makeup.

Then, there was a knock on the door.

Seconds after, my father walked in.

I rolled my eyes at him.

He looked sad, really really sad.

"Sam can I uhh, have a moment with my daughter", he said nervously.

Sam looked at me and then him and then patted my shoulder and left.

I still didn't turn to look at him, I continued with my makeup.

"I'm so sorry..... for bringing you into this -", he started.

"Sorry changes nothing actually", I said sternly.

"I know...but-"

"Please can you not make this thing any more difficult before I change my mind? my whole life I've been trapped from one door to another and just 4 years of being free you decide to trap me into a marriage with someone I have never seen for the rest of my life and you come here and tell me sorry!", I yelled.

He swallowed.

"I know... I'm a horrible father, I know I've made a lot of mistakes in the past and now it's affecting you but I would rather die than watch anyone kill you, and they know you're my weakness... they know very well that if they get to you they'll get to me. And I don't want you dying because of my mistake, you're all I have and I don't want to loose you too.

They fear Amber, the whole nation does, and and when I explained things to him, he understood and he accepted.

Please, don't throw this away, he's the only one that can save you at the moment.... please just stay with him until at least my enemies are all dead... please ", he was crying now.

I should have been crying now too, but I was too strong for this.

I walked up to him slowly with a frown on my face and hugged him.

No matter what... he's my dad and he's doing all he can to protect me.

"I'm sorry my angel, I'm really sorry, I'm make it up to you I promise", He said.

I pulled away and cleaned his tears.

"It's okay father, clean your tears", I said.

"I'm so sorry", he said.

I nodded.

"Let's go", I said and he interlocked my fingers with mine.

We walked side by side till we reached the hall.

I looked around, there weren't many people there because apparently my "Fiance" said he doesn't want too many people present.

Just few friends from college and then few of my Dad's friends.

I looked at the altar and I saw a man dressed In a black suit with deep brown hair and a pair of green eyes.

He looked handsome to be honest, very cute.

Is this Amber?

He looks nothing like how people describe him.

I was expecting to see a demon that fell from the sky,but this looked like an angel.

Daddy walked me to the alter and handed me over to him.

He smiled at me, that's weird because rumors had it that he never smiled.

"Hi, I'm James, it's nice to meet you", he said.

ohhhh so this isn't Amber.

"Nice to meet you", I said returning the smile.

"Sorry, Amber hasn't come yet, I'm his Best friend, he's probably stuck in Traffic or something, let's just wait for a little while or something ", he said and I nodded and stood at the podium and waited.

We waited....

And waited....

And waited....

Minutes rolled into hours and we all stayed in the hall waiting for this "Amber" guy for 4 solid hours.

I could tell even James was upset.

"What's keeping us till now?", Someone asked from the congregation.

"I'm sorry, he probably had an emergency to take care of, let me give him a call right away ", he said bringing out his phone to call Amber.

Such a gentle man.

He had freckles on his face too, and it was cute.

After dialing Amber's line,he put it on speaker and Amber pick.

"James ", I heard a deep husky British access at the end of the line.

"Dude where are you? we've been waiting for you for hours", James said slightly pissed.

"Waiting for me for what exactly? today's my day off, we talked about this last week", The British voice said.

"Obviously it's your day off, because today's your wedding day!", James said visibly pissed.

"Oh really? is that today? how come you didn't remind me?"

My heart sank into my chest.

You're supposed to be reminded about your wedding day?!!!

"Dude.... we'll talk about this later, just come over to the hotel, everyone is waiting for you", James said rubbing his temples.

"Uhhh, I can't", he replied.

"What the -?", I started but James beat me to it.

"What do you mean you can't, everyone has been waiting for you for hours now", James said.

"Well I'm not in Italy at the moment, I took a trip to Miami so.... yeah pretty sad", but in all honesty, it didn't look like he sounded sad.

"Well we'll still have to carry on with the wedding whether you're here or not, you'll exchange your vows through the phone ", James said.

The British voice groaned.

Like he had planned all this.. like he deliberately flew to Miami to avoid the wedding.

And fuck me for not thinking the same way he did and doing the same thing too.

"Fine .... let's get this over with. 10 minutes and we're done here ", he said and James sighed and rolled his eyes.

I swear that my legs feel numb all over.

The priest then started off with a short sermon on love and commitment and I zoned out.

How could I ever love someone like him?

Let's leave the rumors of how he's dangerous and brutal and heatless aside, a first impression would have been nice but no, he chose not to come!

I feel like this is going to be the biggest mistake of my life,but I have to do this....at least for my father.

And if I can't cope with things like this, I'll just leave.

".... Take Mr Amber to be your lovely wedded husband whom you would cherish till death do you apart?", the priest asked.

I almost scoffed, but I held myself from doing so.

Rest of my life?

I doubt we'll barely survive a day.

"Yes....I do", I said.

"And Mr Amber, do you...."

I spaced out again thinking of what I had gotten myself into, I swore I'll never pledge my loyalty to someone I do not like, but this is worse, this is someone I have never even seen.

"....Wedded wife, whom you will cherish all the days of your life till death do you both apart?",

There was silence in the room as no word came from the other side of the call.

My heart started racing as thoughts of him rejecting me clouded my thoughts.

No one has ever rejected me before, I was too beautiful, hot and attractive to be rejected, but then again he has never seen me before.

But why bring me here just to humiliate me when you could have done that a long time ago?

"Yeah sure whatever ", he said and cut the call.

There was silence for almost a minute.

My jaw hung in shock.

He just cut the freaking call!!

"Uhhh...I hereby pronounce you husband and uh...wife", The priest finished up nervously.

* * * * * *

Guess who slipped the ring into my finger in the end?

James!!!

James tried calling him back and it went into voice mail and so we had to carry on with the ceremony without him.

We were at the reception and I sat down there with a bottle of alcohol in my hands lost in thoughts.

What have I gotten myself into??

A gangster?

A Mafian?

A Don?

Whatever he calls himself...I just married him!

This wasn't part of my plan; Marrying someone like my father so that my kids my live to enjoy a happy life, but now I just married Someone who's worse than my father.

Sam came to seat next to me.

"You're nervous?," she asked.

I took a full sip of the bottle of wine in front of me forgetting my lady like manners.

"I just made the biggest mistake in the Universe Sam, what the hell did I just do?!!", I said holding my head.

"Hey calm down pumpkin, you need to breathe, you're getting too hard on yourself, I believe everything will work out for you", she said and I sank into her shoulder.

I just want to live a normal life.

After about an hour of wining , James announced it was time for me to leave and that they've packed my things in the car already.

"I'm gonna miss you", Sam said hugging me so tight.

"Me too", I replied.

"Make sure you text me everyday and feed me on juicy stories, okay? and please reach out to me if things get tough, you know I love you", she said and I nodded.

Soon as I broke out of the hug, my father was standing behind her with a sad face.

"I just don't know what to say other than sorry", he said.

I swallowed not in the mood for anything to get me emotional..

"It's fine father", he said and pulled me into a hug.

"I'll miss you", he whispered.

"Me too", I replied.

We pulled away from each other and I got into the Limo with James.

I sighed and laid my head on the window.

My life is about to get ten times more complicated than it has been.

I can feel it.

James was on his phone, really engrossed in whatever it is he was doing.

"Soooo...tell me about your friend... Amber", I said Trying to bring up a Convo.

He smiled.

"I really don't have anything to say at the moment, you'll just have to see for yourself", he said.

"Oh c'mon, don't I at least get a headstart on what I'm supposed to be expecting?", I asked.

He chuckled.

"Amber has fifty shades, it just depends on the one you're lucky to meet him in, that's the biggest hint I can say", he said and I nodded and relaxed back on the window.

Now I'm going to be married to someone like Amber, someone heatless and cruel.

Honestly I'm not even scared of him, I'm not even scared of what he may or may not do.... I'm just scared of how all this is going to end .

Once again...I hate my life.