TristanI could feel her eyes penetrating me without looking at her. I knew what she was thinking even without her emotions seeping through the bond.Shock. Confusion. I kept my face completely neutral, grasping into her hands more firmly and offering a tight squeeze.‘Trust me,’ I tried to convey through the simple gesture, hoping it seeped in through the bond. She didn't say a word or return the gesture, but she didn't pull away either. Her silent assent was clear.A knot formed in my throat as I grazed my eyes over the headstone. For years on end, I'd constantly visited their graves throughout every anniversary, whether it was their birthdays, their death and on my birthdays. All four occasions were still months incoming. This was the first time within the year that I'd had visited them and it felt like a far cry from the last time. I wasn't the man I was a year ago or even months ago. I was different now.An amalgamation of the past mistakes and present decisions. I was blind ba
ValerieAs soon as I reached my room I slammed the door shut, trying to not break down. My breaths came out shaky. I didn't know how I was able to keep myself composed for the rest of the day, but as we reached the pack house I was already nearing the brink. Guilt. Pure guilt gnawed at my conscience.‘No more secrets or things from the past.’ The weight of my secret bore down on me like a physical force, making it hard to breathe.I had agreed so damn easily when I knew it wasn't true. I'd made a promise I'd already broken.Because our child was still here, tying us together but I hadn't said a damn thing in the last two weeks.Since the confession it constantly came to mind. Every single day felt like a dream. I spent time with him and helped with his duties. We were working towards healing, towards a future together. Everything felt like this was how it was supposed to be.I'd never been happier, and it was especially in those streaks of pure joy that the thought came to mind th
Valerie ‘So, this is how it ends’I felt faint despite the noises surrounding me. The only sensations I had was blinding pain, the warm wetness on my hand and the knowledge that I was shot.Colors filled my vision before everything became clearer. I was on the ground, hands surrounding me that I recognized as Mina, my maid's.“Luna Valerie,” she cried. The memory of what happened moments before filtered in my mind.A simple meeting regarding the pack when a maid suddenly aimed a gun at him. Nobody else noticed.“Alpha Alistair sends his regards,” I heard the assassin say,Before I knew it, I ran to block him and now…I was here.I shifted to the side to find him.My husband, mate and only love, Tristan was dragging Alyn, my sister away from the scene, pulling her back as she tried to reach me. Not once had his eyes crossed here.I sacrificed myself for him, yet he couldn't even look at me or pay attention to me. His eyes, just like his heart and attention, had solely been on my sister
Valerie “Why aren't you downstairs? Don't you know your parents and Alys are waiting for you?” He barked, glaring at me. As tradition stated breakfast within the pack house couldn't start without my presence. It was why I strained myself to wake up so early despite not being a morning person.Were I not in shock, I would have realized.“I…I'm sorry,” I stuttered, “I was just-”“Don’t make any excuses,” he cut me off,“Alyn just recovered from a cold and you're letting her wait for food? Come and let everyone eat.”I pursed my lips shut as he turned away, not even letting me speak. The shock drained away to a familiar ache and I smiled mirthlessly.Of course, the only thing that mattered to him was Alyn.I thought I was used to this, but somehow reliving this hurt worse, especially now.“There you are!” My mother huffed as I arrived, “The food is getting cold. Are you trying to make Alyn fall sick again?”I clenched my jaw. Alyn could eat anytime wished, just like my parents could i
Valerie Silence filled the hall. Nobody said a word as they looked at me. “What are you saying! Are you stupid?” My father suddenly snapped, making me turn back,“I've already thought over my decision father, mother.” I said before turning towards Tristan.“Alpha Tristan, I reject you as my mate. The Moon Goddess bears witness,” I said,Instantly, the bond snapped painfully, but I managed to remain still. The burning sensation lasted as I looked at him completely winded as he stumbled back.“What the-” he breathed out, looking utterly shocked. “I know it wasn't your intention to ever be with me. Not when your true love was by your side. I'd been a barrier to that, but not anymore.” I said.“The rumors were right. Our bond was a mistake from the Moon Goddess and I have to rectify that. Now you can be with the sister you wanted all along.”He looked dazed, like he couldn't understand my words, but I knew he would agree. ‘You never loved me anyways,’ I thought. I was a fool to keep o
Valerie I hesitated. If I refused, I didn't know what he'd do. But joining his pack… After minutes of thinking, it finally came to me. “No,” I finally spoke, making him frown before I rushed out “I won't join your pack, but I have an alternative deal.” He raised a single eyebrow, scrutinizing me but I persisted, speaking while hiding my nerves. Once I finished, he chuckled but I stayed firm. Even though I could tell it wasn't what he wanted, he finally nodded. “You make a fine bargain. Fine then,” he agreed, raising his hand to shake “Pleasure to work with you…Valerie.” he purred, I didn't reply, shaking his hands. The moment I touched him a sharp zing courses my senses. I couldn't barely process it as I let go, meeting his icy blue eyes. “Likewise,” I only managed to muster. As I left the hall my mind circled the sensation. Had I done the right thing? …. ONE MONTH LATER That day, I had set up an alternative deal, one that was enough of a compromise b
Valerie “Enough,” I spoke, using a tone that quieted them. I felt like I was a Luna again. Fighting the penetrating stare by my side looked away before continuing. “Lets resolve this issue.” As a mediator I was meant to listen before making my judgment. Both of them stated their case, the latter being one of the Beta's daughter getting injured by Alyn before a break was proposed. I was free to walk around as I thought over my judgment but stopped when I overheard murmurs from a corner. It was my former pack members talking. “This is so annoying. Alpha Tristan barely said a word.” one of them hissed which I frowned at. I noticed it and was equally confused. How did the man who supported Alys suddenly fall silent? “Is he still sick? The pack doctor didn't say there was something wrong with him though…” Someone whispered, making my ears perk up. “Alpha Tristan hasn't been the same since he suddenly fainted.” the other hummed, “It's been two weeks since that happened and suddenl
‘Impossible’ I wanted to say if my breath hadn't been caught. But it wouldn't feel true even if I wanted it to be.How else then, would he know that I died?I wanted to shove him away, but his hold was firm.“Valerie,” he called out his eyes in the same emotions.“Answer me. Why did you come here? Is Alistair holding you?” he asked, the same strange sad desperation written all over his face. This couldn't be happening.“No,” I breathed out instinctively. I wasn't answering his question, but the effect was still the same as he reared back. He looked hurt.But I couldn't care less about him. Not when I couldn't understand.Why? How did he know? Was this some sick joke from the Goddess?“You have to go. Leave me alone!” I finally bursted, pushing him away with all my strength. I stumbled in shock but quickly recovered. He still looked like he was in a daze.“Valerie.” he called out.“How do you know?” I snapped, frightened.“I don't…” he said, shaking his head, “I don't know how, but I
ValerieAs soon as I reached my room I slammed the door shut, trying to not break down. My breaths came out shaky. I didn't know how I was able to keep myself composed for the rest of the day, but as we reached the pack house I was already nearing the brink. Guilt. Pure guilt gnawed at my conscience.‘No more secrets or things from the past.’ The weight of my secret bore down on me like a physical force, making it hard to breathe.I had agreed so damn easily when I knew it wasn't true. I'd made a promise I'd already broken.Because our child was still here, tying us together but I hadn't said a damn thing in the last two weeks.Since the confession it constantly came to mind. Every single day felt like a dream. I spent time with him and helped with his duties. We were working towards healing, towards a future together. Everything felt like this was how it was supposed to be.I'd never been happier, and it was especially in those streaks of pure joy that the thought came to mind th
TristanI could feel her eyes penetrating me without looking at her. I knew what she was thinking even without her emotions seeping through the bond.Shock. Confusion. I kept my face completely neutral, grasping into her hands more firmly and offering a tight squeeze.‘Trust me,’ I tried to convey through the simple gesture, hoping it seeped in through the bond. She didn't say a word or return the gesture, but she didn't pull away either. Her silent assent was clear.A knot formed in my throat as I grazed my eyes over the headstone. For years on end, I'd constantly visited their graves throughout every anniversary, whether it was their birthdays, their death and on my birthdays. All four occasions were still months incoming. This was the first time within the year that I'd had visited them and it felt like a far cry from the last time. I wasn't the man I was a year ago or even months ago. I was different now.An amalgamation of the past mistakes and present decisions. I was blind ba
2 Weeks LaterTristanIt was said that dying or having a near death experience was life changing. It was no doubt the same for having twice the amount.Life had become good to say the least. Nothing could probably compare to the high I was in now. It seemed to make all the weeks of limbo worth it Valerie was with me. We were together.Now, I was waiting for her to arrive.It was a date.This one however was going to be important, because I had a surprise.“Tristan?” The sound of her voice brought me out of my thoughts. I looked up and my world stopped.Valerie was at the head of the stairs. Her silvery blonde hair was let down, letting it rest in its soft waves. The blue dress she wore flattered her frame perfectly, sending a twist of desire through me. She was…“Beautiful.” The words left my lips before I could think it through, but it was worth it to see the flush rise on her face.“Shut up,” she muttered, loud enough to hear, yet whatever snarky she was holding muddled underneath
ValerieThe pack hall had cleared itself in no time. My final glance at Alyn was a final hollow look she gave. As the guards dragged her out, she looked indifferent, completely unresponsive to everything around her. Like she was catatonic.Perhaps some things…some people weren't capable of change.I pushed the thought aside. After talking to the servants to help clear the hall. I turned away, ready to leave-“Valerie,”I froze at the voice behind me. The urge to run away pricked at my skin but this time I turned around. For the first time in days I met the gazes of my parents. It seemed like they had aged nearly ten years with the way they looked at me. Their faces held more wrinkles, their expressions weary and stricken. It felt like deja vu. Once in this same hall I'd escaped before they could see me. Now as they walked towards me this time I wasn't going to try to escape.They moved closer, stopping a few steps away from me. A weight formed my chest as I saw their expressions, a
Valerie The remaining two days flowed by like water. I hadn't realised how exhausted I was until I'd practically fallen dead asleep after returning from the hospital. Immediately I woke up that day I made all the provisions for his return in the meantime. Sophia and the other maids helped attend to me during that time and the rest of the servants deferred to me for orders. For the past few days I had been making any arrangements I could. I was no longer Luna yet it felt like it while I gave orders, organising things. I hadn't realised how much I missed it until now. I felt more at peace, the weight of the responsibility lighter, more welcoming. I constantly moved between the pack house and back to the hospital whenever I was done, staying with Tristan throughout. Whether it was talking, joking or staying in complete silence, I remained with him as long as possible. Throughout those two days, we never talked about Alyn, my parents or the trial that was looming. Perhaps th
Valerie 'What?’ A sharp prickle rose up my skin in shock. Of all the things he would say this was the most unexpected. “Tristan, You can't…” “It's fair and lawful.” He said, his voice neutral, “The consequences for the attempted murder of a Luna is death.” “I'm no longer Luna,” I countered, heart racing. He frowned for a moment, looking at me “Former Luna then. And no matter Alpha,” Something in me clenched. His words were correct, but still. He, who had protected her for most of her life. Even now that he'd cut all ties with her and didn't regard her anymore than as a pack member, Tristan wasn't cruel. But to easily decide this? ‘To kill her?’ “Tristan…” “Valerie,” he responded, turning to me. My breath hitched at the ashen look in his eyes. The shadows of memories I knew nothing of were reflected in them in a way that made my heart clench. “I know everything now.” He breathed out, “The maliciousness in her heart is too deep.There's no way I can let her stay in this pac
Valerie Sitting at the far corner of the room, I watched as Dr Gerard gave light orders to Tristan, checking on him. Despite the high from moments ago I'd still called on the pack doctor to check on him. I had to look at the floor to keep myself composed. I'd been staring too long, and there was only a limit when minutes of tracing the lines of his face, would seem too much. I couldn't help it though. It was proof. Proof that he was alive, with me. That the past few minutes were real. He LOVED me. The feeling settled inside me. After weeks of the strange limbo we were in, it felt like it had finally rested. I thought I could have time to think things over. Seeing him bloodied and pale, sacrificing his life for me, it all became clear. The thought had stated with me for the entirety of the wait. Sitting alone as his sole visitor and tracing his features over and over again, I'd prayed countless times with that one thing in mind. He couldn't die. I couldn't lose him witho
TristanI vaguely heard myself groan as blinding light pierced my eyes. A faint pain dulled my senses, yet as I adjusted to the brightness I could recognize where I was.The hospital.The blur of Alyn's threats, Valerie and the gunshot remained in my mind. And what happened after I lost consciousness…I shifted, attempting to sit up only to halt at a heavy sensation. Turning to my bedside I realised I wasn't alone. I would recognise that hair anywhere.'Valerie...'She was asleep, her arms intertwined on the empty space on the bed to pillow her face. Her platinum blonde waves swam across the blue matress. Her eyes were flushed, and I quickly understood why as I noticed the dried sheen tracking her cheeks. Tear stains. “Tristan! No! Stay with me!” the echo of her frantic voice remained in my mind. A knot formed in my throat. I remembered everything now. The remaining memories of my past life following her death. The burden in my chest felt even heavier.Just like now, I had realised
Tristan After that day, everything changed. Alyn had returned to her parents home and I barely saw her. The few times I did, I couldn't find it in myself to look at her, the memory of what she'd tried to do- attempting to take advantage of me- was still fresh in my mind. She grew more erratic over the next few days after, often making up an act. Unlike the past however, I could see it clearly now. The clear victimhood. The image I had of her was cracked, and now I couldn't help but wonder; why? I ignored her, simply distancing myself. I was too piled up in waves of guilt and self loathing to fully entertain her actions anyways. Perhaps it was naive, but I forced it aside. Surely that was a sole incident that would eventually be forgotten. That was what I thought until one day, I woke up in the middle of the night to find her naked atop me. I'd opened my eyes with an uneasy feeling. It wasn't until I saw her frame in the darkness that I realised what was happening. What Alyn w