Ditinggal nikah oleh kekasihnya membuat Agatha sangat terpuruk, bagaimana tidak, pernikahan yang telah dirancang dengan baik kini hancur karena sebuah pengkhianatan. Zio sang mantan kekasih tega menduakannya dan menikahi gadis kaya. Terpuruk dalam luka terdalam membuat Agatha hampir melakukan bunuh diri dan diselamatkan oleh seorang pria tampan yang bernama Dirga. Tak pernah terbayangkan bila pria yang pernah menggagalkan aksi bunuh dirinya adalah pemilik perusahaan tempat Agatha bekerja dan memiliki hubungan dengan Zio. Siapakah Dirga sebenarnya? Akankah Dirga menikahi asisten pribadinya setelah melewati malam tragis itu? Mungkinkah Agatha mengungkapkan perasaannya pada Dirga ketika mengetahui pria itu akan menikah dengan wanita yang telah dijodohkan oleh ibunya?
View MoreBeing trapped in your dreams, unable to leave the rooms in your mind because you're still asleep. This is my nightmare... Veronica
Running as fast as my legs could go, I ran towards the old abandoned building ahead, knowing it was the only place for me to hide.
In the light of day, that building looked forlorn and sad, but at night it looked like it housed a lot of horrors. Still I ran towards it, my mind seeing it as the refuge it wasn't. Having explored all other options, it was the only way out.
Not looking back, I entered the abandoned factory through a hole in the wall, small enough to let my small body squirm through without getting stuck. Once inside, I proceeded to look for a place I could hide. It was not lost on me that my only source of light, the moon, was also my source of discovery; the building had no roof.
After a quick search, I finally found a spot that was deep in the dark, away from the shining moon, that would allow me to hide without the fear of getting caught, and I ran towards it as fast I could as soon as I heard his heavy footsteps.
After successfully hiding, it was the sound of my heart, beating frantically that made me fear I could get caught. I knew from experience that the brute chasing me could hear the tiniest of sounds, so I tried to calm my racing heart.
I closed my eyes, and prayed as I waited. I heard nothing for some time, and I began to relax a bit because he never took this long to find me and take me away to his torture chamber. Maybe, just maybe, I would be saved this time.
I whispered a pray of thanks, but it seemed my relief and gratitude were premature because I heard the voice that I had come to know like the back of my hand.
"Do you think you can hide from me, Veronica?" He said, his voice echoing.
I could tell he was around, so I huddled closer into the dark, behind the board.
"You're mine, Veronica. I will get you. Save me all that trouble and come out, and I promise you'll enjoy what I want to do to you tonight. I bought you a beautiful, red night dress that I want you to wear lying on my bed tonight"
I clamped my hand immediately over my mouth, when a rat decided to jump on my head. I didn't run all this time only, to be caught because of a rat, even one as big as the one now walking boldly on my body. I didn't even bother to shake it off because I feared it might give away my location.
"You're getting me angry, Veronica!!!" He shouted, and I heard something being smashed against the wall.
God please! God please! God please! I kept on chanting in my mind.
Just then, something happened and I knew it was over for me. Another rat had fallen on me and I released a sound; it was neither loud or quiet, but it was loud enough.
Fear wrapped its icy hands around my heart, squeezing me for all I was worth. When I heard no sound at all, I began to wonder what was happening. I needed to know where he was so I could prepare myself to bolt or fight, but that choice was taken away, when I heard a psychotic voice laugh directly behind me.
"I found you."
I screamed, and didn't stop screaming till I felt someone violently shake me, begging me to wake up.
"For God's sake Veronica open your eyes! It's a dream!" The voice kept saying, but I struggled to open my eyes because it felt like it was glued shut.
When I finally opened my eyes, I looked around trying to find something familiar to chase away the remnants of that horrible dream. I was in my room and my room mate was on my bed. Even with the AC on, my bed was totally covered in my sweat. Knowing I needed to calm down, Cynthia didn't speak.
I kept my eyes closed, trying my best to ignore my friend, I didn't want to see the pity I knew I would see in her eyes.
This nightmare made it the seventeenth one I would have this year alone, since I stopped going for therapy; and it was just June. The therapy had not been helping, so I decided not to waste money that I could have used for better things, like going on a vacation, or saving up to get Cynthia and Paul a wedding gift.
Cynthia disagreed with my decision, but I already made my decision and there was nothing she could do about it.
As certified as Dr Anthony was, all he did for me was not helping me get better. If anything, my nightmares grew worse and more vivid.
After the unfortunate incident that left me damaged and scared, I haven't lived the best life relationship wise. Even though it had been years since I was raped, ten years to be exact, it was safe to say I had been damaged for other men; I couldn't stand intimacy.
And we didn't need rocket science to conclude that no relationship could survive without intimacy, especially when the tiniest of touch tends to make me panic. If I couldn't stand touches, I definitely couldn't allow kisses, hugs, and the mother of all intimacy, sex. I knew my friends were worried, Cynthia and Diana had set me up with different men because of it.
I stopped therapy my second year of college, after I accepted that I was probably going to remain single and decided to love it. What made me decide to start again was when Paul, Cynthia's boyfriend, asked her to marry him. The whole scene, coupled with the words he used, struck a chord in my already made up mind.
If Cynthia, with her domestic violence experience, could move past it to the point of getting married after she swore she wouldn't, I definitely could get past my past too, right?
Most of my friends had either gotten married, or they had significant others, or they were just sleeping around and here I was, doing nothing. Mum and Dad couldn't help but worry that I might become a nun, and not give them a grandchild. That's why it's advisable to have more than one child, not that they had a say in the matter. Before me, mum had suffered eight miscarriages. I was the lucky one given to them in their late thirties.
"You do know I am right when I say you should continue with therapy." Cynthia said slowly as if trying to gauge if I was ready for a discussion.
"I am not..." I began to argue but she cut me off with a wave of her hand.
"Not with Dr Anthony. Someone else, Diana happens to know someone that had a similar problem too and is now in a committed relationship for about six months now." She said, her voice taking on that advocacy tone she wasn't aware she used out of work.
"Cynthia, I don't have money to waste on therapy anymore. Besides, what if I haven't just met the right guy? Have you guys never thought of that." I asked even though I knew the answer to that question.
Over the years, I've met nice, handsome and responsible men that I had wanted to, at least, try something with. But after the first three dates- if it ever gets to three that is, they begin to expect more and I honestly couldn't give them that. If I couldn't have sex, there was no relationship to be had. Okay, that was a bit extreme, but I knew we'd at least had to get intimate. I couldn't seem to get pass handholding, and I even had to mentally count numbers backwards to keep from bolting during the whole thing.
She gave a loud unladylike snort that made me want to smile, "Babe, you have met some pretty awesome guys."
"Well they didn't make my pulse race with anything but replusion anytime they wanted to kiss me, so maybe they weren't that awesome." I countered.
"So, my brother wasn't awesome?" She asked, and I could hear she was slightly offended.
Someone was obviously still hurt I broke her brother's heart when things didn't progress into a relationship, and I couldn't blame her. Because of it, Tom kept avoiding me, which also meant he stopped visiting her in our apartment, when he practically used to live here before.
"I didn't say that. It was a general assumption and you concluded I also meant that." I was sorry about it, but I was still so frazzled by my dream I couldn't bring myself to be more apologetic.
"That's why I told you I wasn't interested in the first place." I continued. She tried to speak but I didn't let her by speaking over her in a slightly louder voice.
"Remember I told you that it might not work out but you begged me, telling me he loved me, and I argued that I might break his heart because I don't feel the same, and you said that I won't because I would fall in love with him. You were so eager to pair us up that I decided to humor you not to break your heart, especially after I lost that trivia bet." I said without taking a pause.
"I know...I know. And I agree I pushed and pushed, so I'll drop it. But on the therapist issue, why not give it a try. Unlike the old geezers you've been seeing, this doctor is young, so I heard. Try him out." She tried to persuade me. I really would have tried, but I had repeated the process so much I couldn't see myself sitting on a couch everytime, answering questions I already answered. I declined, gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before getting out of my bed to go use the bathroom so I could go to work.
"I'll pay for it!" She blurted out. And that got my attention, making me turn to look at her. "I need all my money for the wedding but I am willing to pay."
"What's the catch?" I asked, not trusting her at all as I moved slowly to take my towel from its position on my wardrobe.
"No catch at all." She replied too sweetly and I snorted.
"I have lived with you for what now- seven years, I know you well enough to know that there is a catch." I said. We started a staring match, her eyes denying there's an ulterior motive and mine telling her to spill. I saw the moment I won the match and she did exactly what I wanted.
"Okay!" She raised both hands in surrender, "the catch is......" She drawled, trying to stall, making me give her a blank stare to let her know I wasn't amused by her antics.
"I hate those eyes of yours when you stare at me like that." She said
"I'm listening."
"Okay fine. The catch is you try to give my brother an honest chance." She said sounding unsure of herself.
I gave her an exaggerated roll of my eyes to let her know how ridiculous that catch was. With my back to her, I began to take off my soft yellow tee-shirt. When I was done, I took my towel and wrapped it around my body.
"News flash! I already gave him a chance." I announced, moving towards the bathroom in my room. As expected, she followed me.
"Listen to me. I know I am being stubborn on this matter of you and brother.." She began
"Atleast you know what you are" I said dryly.
She ignored that and continued like I didn't say a thing.
"Tom told me that you really didn't give him a chance."
"I gave him a chance. Knowing I have a regular of three dates, I gave him four dates. That, to me, is more than a chance!" I was beginning to get angry.
"No. I believe you expected the relationship to fail and you came in with that mindset and nothing he did could convince you. That led me to assume that maybe it's not the touchy- feely part alone that is hindering you from having a relationship but the fact that you've already made up your mind nothing would come out of it, based on past experiences. And you do that to avoid getting hurt. That is a turn off on its own."
I just stared at her, totally speechless as I watched her talk like a seasoned psychologist.
"I say you missed your calling as a psychologist or counsellor and you are wasting away being a firefighter." I replied humorlessly
"What do you have to lose? I said I'll pay for the first two therapy sessions as long as you agree to see the doctor I told you about." She said.
"And if after everything, I don't fall in love with your brother?" I waited for her response.
"As long as you get better and move forward, I don't mind if you fall in love with someone else."
I mulled over what she said in my mind and I agreed with her. I had nothing to lose if I agreed to see this doctor but I stood gain a lot.
A quick glance at her showed me she knew I was thinking about it. I would have laughed at the way she was worrying her lower lip if I didn't have to make such an important decision.
Therapy with this person could mean I could get better, which could mean I could finally get into a relationship and then have crazy monkey sex like the ones I've seen on tv. And who knows, maybe my nightmares would finally end.
You lose nothing from trying...
"Set up an appointment. I'll see the doctor."
If happiness was a person, it would be Cynthia. She leaped into the air, her excitement, palpable on her face.
"You won't regret it, I promise." She said as she hugged me, still jumping.
"Let's wait and see."
Peluru itu hampir saja mengenai Agatha, beruntungnya Dirga menarik tangan istriinya dan mereka jatuh hingga tidak ada yang tertembak, "Anda berani sekali mengambil pistol pihak kepolisian, Anda akan dihukum berat," gumam pria berseragam seraya menggertak. Jujur apa yang didengar oleh Agatha tadi benar-benar berita yang sangat mengejutkan, dia tidak pernah menyangka jika Saras dan Selena membuat rencana yang membuat Agatha mempertaruhkan janinnya hingga membuat Dirga marah besar dan memenjarakan ibu dan adik tirinya. "Maafkan aku, Tha! Kau harus mengalami hal seperti ini karena aku," desah Dirga merasa bersalah. Sebagai putera dar Saras, Dirga merasa malu memiliki seorang ibu yang tega mencelakai menantunya sendiri, bahkan Saras tega membunuh calon cucunya sendiri karena tidak menyukai Agatha."Aku hanya tidak pernah berpikir bila Ibumu akan sejahat ini, Ga." Agatha meneteskan air matanya. Ia tidak berhenti menangis karena benar-benar sedih dengan apa yang terjadi pada dirinya
Boy tak bisa lagi berbohong apalagi menutupinya hingga akhirnya dia mulai mengungkapkan kebenaran yang sebenarnya terjadi pada Dirga dan tak pernah dia menduga bila selama tinggal di rumahnya, Selena selalu saja bersikap seolah tuan rumah dan mengintimidasi Agatha lagi. Untuk memastikan hal itu benar atau tidak. Dirga menemui bik Siti dan memastikannya. Betapa hancurnya hati Dirga ketika mendengar kabar tersebut. Pria itu tak bisa lagi menahan emosinya hingga membuat Dirga marah."Maafkan saya, Pak. Saya terpaksa menutupi kebenaran ini karena Mbka Agatha terus saja melarang saya," ucap bik Siti menunduk seraya duduk bersimpuh. Tak pernah terpikirkan oleh Dirga bila hal seperti ini terjadi, "Sejak kapan Agatha diperlakukan seperti itu, Bik?" tanya Dirga ingin tahu."Setelah Pak Dirga mengetahui kebenaran tentang kecelakaan itu, Nyonya dan Nona Selena berubah sikap kepada saya dan mbak Agatha.""Pantas saja bila Agatha terlihat kelelahan saat malam tiba, ternyata dua perempu
Dirga segera naik ke atas dan melihat Agatha yang begitu serius melihat ponselnya, "Tidak, Ga.Ini tidak benar? Bik Siti bukan buronan dan dia bukanlah orang yang telah mendorongku." Agatha mendekati Dirga seraya mencengkeram tangannya dan meminta pria itu untuk mencabut tuntutan itu, "Ayo, Ga. Cabut saja tuntutanmu itu, Bik Siti tidak bersalah," pintanya dnegan mata yang berlinang."Apa kau yakin?" tanya dirga ingin tahu kejadian yang sebenarnya, sejujurnya Dirga ingin menanyakan hal itu padda Agatha namun mengingat dia masih berkabung maka sang suami sengaja untuk menunda pertanyaan itu, apa yang menyebabkan Agatha bisa keguguran karena selama ini Agatha selalu berhati-hati."Aku jatuh sendiri dan tidak ada oranga yang mendorongku hanya sa-ja saat itu aku seperti menginjak sesuatu yang licin." Agatha mengingat itu dengan jelas dan dia mulai menceritakan kejadian yang sebenarnya pada Dirga. Dirga langsung berkomentar, "Mungkin saat itu Bik Siti habis mengepel dan kau meng
"Jika kau sudah tahu jawabannya, kenapa kau masih bertanya?" ucap Dirga meliriknya tajam. Dirga meminta dua perempuan itu untuk meninggalkan ruangan di mana Agatha dirawat. Pria itu bahkan menutup pintu dengan kasar. Dirga langsung memutar tubuhnya dan menghampiri Agatha. "Kenapa kau terlihat takut Agatha? Apakah kau telah meragukan cintaku padamu?" tanya pria itu dengan tatapannya dingin."Bukan begitu, Ga. Aku hanya takut karena kondisiku yang seperti ini kau ingin meninggalkanku jadi ak--" Belum sempat melanjutkan kalimatnya Dirga langsung memotong ucapan Agatha. "Apa kau pikir aku hanya bermain-main saja dengan hubungan kita ini? Tidak, Ga. Aku serius padamu meskipun kau tidak bisa hamil sekalipun aku akan tetap bersamamu. Bukankah itu janji yang aku ucapkan sewaktu kita menikah dulu." Di situ Agatha mengungkapkan bahwa dia merasa benar-benar sedih dan kecewa pada dirinya sendiri karena telah gagal menjaga janinnya dengan baik sehingga dia harus mengalami hal yang begitu
"Apa yang sedang kau pikirkan, Tha? Jangan terllau banyak berpikir, lebih baik kau istirahat saja," titah Dirga memberi perintah. Pria itu menyelimuti tubuh Agatha dan menyuruhnya untuk tidur karena hari masih gelap, ditambah lagi suasana yang begitu dingin membuat Dirga pun ikut tidur di samping Agatha. Alankah terkejutnya Agatha ketika mnggerjapkan matanya dan cahaya sinaran matahari hari sungguh sangat menyilaukan matanya. "Kau harus bangun, Agatha," ucap seorang perempuan yang sangat dikenalnya."Ibu," ucap Agatha membukanya dengan lebar."Iya, aku rasa kau sudah cukup istirahatnya dan bangunlah karena aku punya kabar untukmu," jawab perempuan paruh baya itu."Kabar apa, Bu?" tanya Agatha sangat penasaran. Saras tersenyum tipis dan menunjukkan sebuah amplopberwarrna putih kepada Agatha, "sebaiknya kau baca saja isi di dalam amplop ini." Perempuan itu memberi perintah. Agatha yang sangat penasaran pun langsung duduk dan membuka amplop tersebut. Membaca isi surat ter
Dirga diperkenankan masuk oleh dokter, tak lupa juga pria itu meminta dokter untuk memeriksa Agatha lagi. Mengikuti langkah dokter, Dirga menghentikan laju langkahnya ketika mendapati wajah sang istri nampak pucat sekali pasca keguguran itu. Dirga menyentuh jemari sang istri begitu kuat seraya memandangi wajah Agatha. Entah bagaimana perasaan Agatha bila dia thau bahwa bayinya kini sudah tidak ada lagi. "Kuharap kedepannya kau mau menerima kenyataan ini, Tha," ucap Dirga berurai air mata. Sehari semalam Agatha dirawat namun perempuan tiu belum juga sadar, dokter juga merasa heran deengan knidisi Agatha. Namun, melihat hasil dari pemeriksaan dokter semuanya nampak baik-baik saja."Mungkin ada sesuatu hal yang membuat pasien enggan untuk bangun!" seru dokter itu menatap Dirga."Apa itu, Dok? Tolong, bantu istri saya," ucapnya sambil menyentuh lengan pria berjas putih itu. Pria itu mengeaskan, jalann satu-satunya adalah Dirga sendiri. Kemampuann Dirga bisa membangunkan is
"Tidak, Nyonya. Aku bersumpah bukan aku pelakunya." Mendengar suara sirine ambulan, bik Siti langsung memanggil anggota medis dan ikut ke dalam mobil ambulan. Sedangkan Saras dan Selena berpura-pura menangis karena dia ingin membersihkan sesuatu sebelum menuju ke rumah sakit dan juga ingin menelepon Dirga. Ketika sampai di sebuah rumah sakit, bik Siti nampak sangat panik sekali disebabkan Agatha terkulai lemas dengan tetesan darah segar di tubuhnya. Pikiran bik Siti mulai kalut, dia yakin sekali bahwa perempuan itu pasti mengalami pendarahan karena telah jatuh dari tangga namun dia tetap berdoa semoga bayi dalam kandungan Agatha baik-baik saja. Mendengar derap langkah sepatu pantopel yang sangat khas, bik Siti menoleh ke arah sumber suara, matanya berlinang saat itu. "Mbak Agatha jatuh dari tangga, Pak," ucapnya menguraikan air mata."Ini ulah perempuan tua ini, Ga," sambung seorang pria dengan menunjuk ke arah bik Siti. Bukan itu saja Selena yang ikut hadir di rumah s
Saras tak bisa lagi menahan amarahnya hingga perempuan tua itu melemparkan seua alat kosmetik yang ada di atas laci. "Kenapa Dirga selalu saja percaya orang lain dari apda ibu kandungnya sendiri!" Saras benar-benar tidak bisa terima hal itu. Bukankah selam ini Saras yang mengurus Dirga, sejak dalam kandungan hingga dia sedewasa ini. "Tuhan, kenapa Dirga bisa bersikap seperti ini padaku?" gumamnya serya terus memadangi langit dari jendela kamarnya. Buliran bening jatuh membasahi pipinya, jauh di dalam lubuk hatinya Saras sangat menyayangi Dirga namun mengingat pria itu sangat membela istrinya membuatnya mulai membenci Dirga. Dia menggertakkan giginya karena geram dengan tingkah putera kandungnya itu. Hingga kedatangan Selena pun tak disadari oleh Saras, melihat ibunya menangis peremouann itu mendekatinya dan bertanya, "Apakah kau sesayang itu pada Dirga? Kenapa kau tidak mendekatinya? Ingatlah Bu, ikatan antara anak dan Ibu itu kuat jadi aku yakin, perlahan Dirga akan mema
Sejak hari itu, Saras dan Selena terus berusaha mengintimidasi Agatha. Mereka bahkan menyuruh Agatha yang melayani kebutuhan mereka, layaknya seorang pemabntu. Seoerti itulah Saras dan Selena memperlakukan Agatha sewaktu Dirga tidak ada. Melihat bik Siti yang selalu saja membantu Agatha membuat Selena mulai menemukan sebuah ide bahwa dia bisa mengusir bik Siti dengan sebuah cara yang sangat manjur, cara yang ada di dalam otaknya pun langsung dia katakan kepada Saras membuat perempuan paruh baya itu tersenyum dan mengatakan bahwa rencana Selena sungguh merupakan ide brilian. Dia rasa cara itu adakah sebuah cara yang tepat agar bisa menyelamatkan keturunannya dari si perempuan miskin itu. "Tidak ada salahnya kita mencoba dan pastikan bahwa pelakunya adalah pembantu tua itu.""Ibu tenang saja, aku pasti akan menyusun rencana ini dengan baik," jawab Selena tersenyum menyeringai. Tidak ingin sampai seseorang mengetahui rencananya maka Saras mencari cara yang paling efektif agar
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