you re so old jokes one liners

On her birthday, Vicky Shaw's beloved husband, Tyler Hart, was found to be having a candle light dinner with his childhood sweetheart. The birthday present he gave her was a text message requesting a divorce.During their three years of marriage, she did everything she could to keep him with her, throwing all the beds in the other rooms when he was not in the house so he had nowhere else to sleep other than with her.After a fateful car crash, however, she had amnesia and was no longer the woman who loved him deeply. When Tyler finally visited her in the hospital, the first thing he asked was to get her to agree to the divorce. The new Vicky agreed immediately.Everyone knew how much the old Vicky loved Tyler. Only Tyler knew he had loved her dearly.

Allie, is a young girl trying to take care of her small family. she is caught in a fix when her clumsiness leads her into breaking expensive chinas she was meant to transport. Ahmad is a young ruthless man starting up his second empire. He is also the heir to Tilespree, although he doesn't want to have anything to do with his father's wealth. He's trapped when his father gives him two options, an arranged marriage or a quick one with the woman he loves or he faces being cut off of his source of income. Threatened, Ahmad looks for other solutions. He comes up with one and it involves Allie. Will she succumb to his force? will his plans fail? you'd have to find out!

Alva has been arranged to get married to Lucas, the young heir to the Rossi Empire. On the day that has been arranged for her engagement, Lucas changes his mind, choosing to marry her timid, less attractive servant and throwing the family into chaos. Lucas Rossi is the, strikingly handsome, yet intimidating heir to the Rossi Empire. A man barely seen, completely avoidant of the paparazzi and with rumours spreading here and there about how he is only half human, yet no one can tell what the other half of him is. When he agrees to marry the politician's daughter in paper alone for the sake of business bonds, he is astounded by his sudden pull to the Hazel, whose life is turned upside down when she catches his attention instead. Why has he left the ethereal looking heiress to settle for a mere maid?

Bradley is faced with a difficult decision: let go of the past, give up on the present, and give the future a chance. However, no decision becomes easy when it comes to sex, love and fears. This is when Bradley questions everything. Is it possible to help others to the point of sacrificing your own happiness? He has no idea what to do: Claire or Chelsea? Which of the two will he really get to know, to the point that his heart chooses the right woman?

Patrice Kwon is a struggling student who just came out of the orphanage. She juggled jobs just to suffice and thrive in her lowly life. But one day, she was given a once in a lifetime opportunity to earn more than what she’s currently earning and at the same time, to study at a prestigious school. She only had to be one of the tutors of some rich but dumb high school boys. And there he met his nemesis, Lance Kim, who is also the student that she was going to tutor.

On the morning of her wedding day, Chelsea saw her sister moan under her fiancé's embraces. Later that night after she canceled her wedding, she got drunk and called a night escort service for revenge sex. So she spends the night together under the influence of alcohol. Little did she know that the man she thought was a night escort, turns out to be Liam Shax, the narcissistic CEO! As she feels guilty thinking that she had raped someone, Chelsea is about to jump into the river. "I'll give you a purpose to live! So come down first,” as Liam's voices reach her ears, she turned around. "What purpose?" "To bear my child." ".... euw." -splash!- "Did she just say 'euw' before jumping?" "Yes ... sir. SIR?!" Liam jumps to the river.

Jane Duncan is able to secure a job at the best publishing company in the country, France Publishing, where she does her best to achieve her dream of becoming the best writer in the country. But what happens when Jane falls in love with her Superior? A love so strong that she's unable to set herself free from that, felt like she has been chained to him. That she would love him for the rest of her life as if she was bound to him. And what if a very determined ex-boyfriend comes into the picture? Will she be able to get the love she so yearns for or not? Will she be able to achieve her dreams? Have you ever fallen for someone so bad that it hurts? You get this burning sensation in your chest like someone is ripping your chest out, or maybe it's just your heart that's shattering into pieces bit by bit? Have you ever fallen for someone you knew it would be impossible to have, but you couldn't stop yourself from falling deeper? I know it sounds cliché and all, but that's how I feel right now. And the surprising part is that I don't know when it happened or how it happened, but it just did. ----Jane Duncan

In my sixth year with Nathan Bennett. "Nathan, I'm getting married," I said. He jolted, suddenly snapping back to reality, looking somewhat troubled. "Hannah, you know the company is at a crucial point with our financing. I'm not in the mood to..." “It’s okay,” I replied, my smile calm and composed. Nathan misunderstood. I was getting married, but not to him.

"Mama, is Uncle our Daddy?" Finn asked with a pout. Zora bent down so she was face to face with her son. She ran her fingers through his hair with a strained smile. "Then who is Papa? Which of them is our Daddy, Mama?" The little boy probed. "Uncle, Finn," Tears pooled in the woman's eyes. How was she to tell them? Just how was she to tell her kids who their Dad really was? "Papa is not Freya and your Daddy. Uncle is your Daddy," "But uncle made you cry, Mama. I don't want Uncle to be my new Papa," The boy replied and ran off. *** Four years later, Zora Walter was now a well known model with two kids and her boyfriend. She had to return to New York City because one of her children had cancer and she was referred to a hospital in NYC. What she didn't expect was to meet him, the father of her children again and what happens when the buried desires threaten to come alive again? Would Zora be able to handle being with Elliot especially now that she was in a serious relationship with Derek? How will Elliot react after realizing he has two beautiful kids? Would he leave his golden wife for his ex girlfriend and kids? Or would they decide to bury whatever they had and leave it that way?

This is the age of exotics and technology! Due to the discovery of the miracle metal resource- exotics, humanity was plunged into an era of war. Kalen Drake was born into this cruel era where the ones with the biggest fist speak. As a knight who lost both his parents to the tentacles of war and its cruelty, he sought to stop all the carnage. To do this, he must step up to the daunting task of overthrowing the rule of the big 5 organizations. In a world dominated by high-grade warriors, technology that can only be dreamed of in the 21st century, and dangerous mutated exobeasts, Kalen gradually fought his way to the peak of power as a divine warrior. Referred to as the chosen one, the Divine Commanders of humanity led by the legendary Hercules looked up to him as the one to lead them in battle. Join me as we witness Kalen's meteoric rise to power and how he'll conspire against and overthrow the rule of the big 5 to stabilize the world again.