you re so old jokes one liners

"Mama, is Uncle our Daddy?" Finn asked with a pout. Zora bent down so she was face to face with her son. She ran her fingers through his hair with a strained smile. "Then who is Papa? Which of them is our Daddy, Mama?" The little boy probed. "Uncle, Finn," Tears pooled in the woman's eyes. How was she to tell them? Just how was she to tell her kids who their Dad really was? "Papa is not Freya and your Daddy. Uncle is your Daddy," "But uncle made you cry, Mama. I don't want Uncle to be my new Papa," The boy replied and ran off. *** Four years later, Zora Walter was now a well known model with two kids and her boyfriend. She had to return to New York City because one of her children had cancer and she was referred to a hospital in NYC. What she didn't expect was to meet him, the father of her children again and what happens when the buried desires threaten to come alive again? Would Zora be able to handle being with Elliot especially now that she was in a serious relationship with Derek? How will Elliot react after realizing he has two beautiful kids? Would he leave his golden wife for his ex girlfriend and kids? Or would they decide to bury whatever they had and leave it that way?

Julian Ziegler betrays his and Willow Harper's four-year marriage. He pursues his true love like mad, wanting to make up for the regrets he experienced in his youth. Willow loves him deeply and tries her best to win him back. However, he wraps an arm around his true love and mocks her. "You're the furthest thing from a woman I've ever seen, Willow! I can't even get it up when I look at your icy face!" Willow's heart dies at his words. She no longer clings to him and leaves, not wanting to embarrass herself further. … Julian doesn't recognize Willow when they meet again. She sheds her strong, domineering façade, revealing a softer, more affectionate side. Countless big shots pursue her—even the most powerful man in the city smiles only for her. Julian loses his mind! He loiters outside her door every night, giving her checks and expensive jewelry. If possible, he would dig out his heart for her. When others are curious about their relationship, Willow merely smiles indifferently. "Mr. Ziegler is just a passing chapter in the book of my life."

This is the age of exotics and technology! Due to the discovery of the miracle metal resource- exotics, humanity was plunged into an era of war. Kalen Drake was born into this cruel era where the ones with the biggest fist speak. As a knight who lost both his parents to the tentacles of war and its cruelty, he sought to stop all the carnage. To do this, he must step up to the daunting task of overthrowing the rule of the big 5 organizations. In a world dominated by high-grade warriors, technology that can only be dreamed of in the 21st century, and dangerous mutated exobeasts, Kalen gradually fought his way to the peak of power as a divine warrior. Referred to as the chosen one, the Divine Commanders of humanity led by the legendary Hercules looked up to him as the one to lead them in battle. Join me as we witness Kalen's meteoric rise to power and how he'll conspire against and overthrow the rule of the big 5 to stabilize the world again.

Bradley is faced with a difficult decision: let go of the past, give up on the present, and give the future a chance. However, no decision becomes easy when it comes to sex, love and fears. This is when Bradley questions everything. Is it possible to help others to the point of sacrificing your own happiness? He has no idea what to do: Claire or Chelsea? Which of the two will he really get to know, to the point that his heart chooses the right woman?

Love, Happy Endings, Soulmates, these are the things we want and need in life, we want to get them, but it's easier said than done. Certain factors need to be considered. Relationships and Love need few unmaterialistic things, but sadly, Caden Ian Manchester and Fiona Guinevere Kings do not know these. Weighed with traumas and scars, they hid their true self from each other, but the past never stays hidden, and it gets revealed in the worst way possible. Fiona Kings looks like a real life Barbie, but she sure as hell doesn't live in a fairytale, if it's a fairytale, it's a twisted one, a very twisted fairytale. Her life has being chaotic, from a family that don't care about her, to an abusive and psychotic boyfriend. She met him, Caden Manchester, it seem like she's drawn to the bad boys, Aren't we all?. Caden Manchester is a walking trauma, a breathing disaster, a living catastrophe, an addictive poison. She knows she should run, everyone tells her to run, but once Love gets into the equation, leaving seems unlikely. Caden Manchester is an orphan, a drug addict, a result of a broken home. An Artist who has definitely lost his muse. He meets her, Fiona Kings. She seems like his saving grace, his last and final shot at redemption, all he has to do is let her get tangled in his web of pain, death and painful secrets. He's no good for her, he's aware of this,  She's too angelic, but like a moth drawn to flame, he's drawn to her, to light. She's his Vanilla, His butterfly whose wings he breaks, rendering her broken. He breaks her, shatters her, destroys her, but she didn't leave. He tries to push her away, but, she stuck with him.

Callista Rose, a 20-year-old girl who is so beautiful and innocent. Every man who sees her will surely fall in love with her and want to have her. But her fate is not as beautiful as her face. Her parents have died since she was little. She lives with her step-aunt and with a cousin who continues to torture her. Her fate becomes worse when two cruel vampire princes fell in love with her.

An unsual story of a doctor and a mafia boss who meet each other by accident one night. Was it an accident or was it their fate that brought them together? What are the odds of them falling in love? But love happens when you least expect it. A story of love,loss and hope. Hope that maybe one day two people with completely different worlds would fall in love and fill the void in each others life.

Umaasa si Pauleen na kahit isang beses lang. Makakasalamuha siya ng isang kalahi ni Adan after being tore down by her bastard college boyfriend na ipinalit siya sa babaeng Donsol sa Architectural Department. Humahanga na siya sa mga Blue Warrior pero mas lalong nadagdagan ang paghanga niya sa FVC members. Kaya nang makilala niya si Beverly Hernandez-ang babaeng nagdala sa kanya sa naturang lugar. Tuluyang nakamit ang isang pangarap niya sa buhay. Doon niya nakilala ang antipatiko at hambog na si Bruce Bergman. Naglaho ang fascination niya dito lalo na ng palagi siya nitong binabara dahilan kung bakit tumubo ang iritasyon niya sa binatilyo. Ano kaya ang mangyayari kapag itong dalawa ang palaging nasasangkot sa walang humpay na bangayan?

Sceptical Lou Riley desires love, however what will she do once she gets an opportunity to own her fairytale romance? Will she freak out and push him away, afraid he is getting to break her heart or go along with it and hope it is the real thing?

A million reasons why we can’t be together, but a billion more why we desire to be. Hikari Yi is a girl of a grim, fatalistic world, the love of a family was never one of her assets. Away from the fallen realm of her father’s menacing territory, she leads an independent life. Little did she know the world she was running away from, was advancing towards her at a pace faster than she was travelling at. Hikari admires a world famous boy band, the ORIONS, consisting of seven members. She somehow receives an offer to look after them as a manager or a caretaker. As unexpected as it looks, it isn't. The more time she spends around them, she grows infatuated with one of the seven. Are the feelings mutual? Is he the one to fill the void of solicitude in her life? Overtime, mysteries unfold, what was Hikari's past? What other plans does she have for the boyband she adore? What secrets has she locked? As it is, it isn’t just her. The Orions, too, have got their own darkness to unravel. ____________________________________ -"Tell me once you again that you love me" -"Reassure me once more that you'll stay forever, that you won't leave me alone." -"Who are you.. No... What are you exactly?" -"I want you Hikari. Now." -"Is that how you talk to your boss?" -"Your clothes are see-through" -"Yakuzas are the most feared mob group" -“This world won’t let us be.” ____________________________________ It's an enthralling, mystery, romance, action thriller. It has everything you've been looking for. High school romance? Office heated relations? Eternal love? Mafia? demons? Vampires? Boys? Best friends? Family? Action? Suspense? It's all there, read to indulge in the roller-coaster adventure!