you re so old jokes one liners

“I know him Shera, I saw him in my dreams!” After all the years she had been dreaming of that man, she finally saw that he was a real person—not just her subconscious imaginative phases. “The man in my dreams is real”. Andrea waited for four long years to prove that her future man was real but he was different from what she was thinking. The way she saw it made her feel that they have different worlds, to begin with. Andrea is a simple college girl, living in the countryside, claiming her man to be someone in her dreams. Is it possible for your dreams to come true? A question that no one can answer. Can you love a person in your dreams? An unusual question for Andrea but only she knows the answer. Looking at the man on the other side of the road made her feel something unusual—something special. Constantine Dimiscus was the man on the other side of the road, heir of Dimiscus family, a very serious person who doesn’t believe in love, faith, and destiny. Can life make him believe that destiny is real?

~If Love is a drug, then I want to be high on you forever. If Love is a crime then I wanna be your victim but if Love is an Addiction then I wanna get insanely Addicted To You. . Brianna Anderson hasn't met anyone that caught her interest. Well, all that is about to change in the course of one sexy night.

"Sophie Patterson. Don't you dare walk away from me." Logan's menacing stare bore at me. I suddenly didn't feel drunk anymore. I sobered up quickly. "What, Logan? You're gonna tell me that you suddenly love me again? That you're here to sweep me off my feet? Please! I didn't need you all this time, and I don't need you now." He clenched his jaw, fisting his hands. "Enough. Stop being so damn stubborn. You know I do. I love you. I never stopped loving you, Sophie. It was always you." I left my hometown hoping to never see him again. I left with his baby still inside of me. Seven years after, and here I am again. Standing before him and a six-year-old wanting to know who his dad is, and asking me to marry him because everyone in his class but him and his best friend don't have a daddy.What am I supposed to do with all these feelings that are resurfacing? I'm realizing every day that I never got over him. I merely suppressed my feelings, and him telling me this now- in my face, just made things more complicated.

It was just a one night mistake but turned into a lifetime imprisonment. Allanna and Giel’s agreement is to be married for convenience with a written contract and their signatures on it. Will Allanna be able to act along with Giel for the sake of the contract, or will her feelings grow for him?

She’s texting him her heart. But she’s got the wrong number… When Isabel “El” Watson applied for a sales job with her company, she had no idea a jelly donut would explode on her blouse, or that her grumpy boss would practically laugh her out of the interview. Accountants could be salespeople, she was sure of it, even if that jerkface didn’t think so. So when a lady at the local wine festival offers her a sales job on the spot at a new boutique winery, El jumps at the chance. She also jumps at the chance to text with the guy who danced with her at the festival. Life was finally looking up. Boston’s friend, Chad, never should have given Boston’s number to the girl at the wine festival as a joke, but the damage was done. When El sends Boston a text later that night, believing he is Chad, he’s too nice to hurt her feelings by telling her the truth. But there are a few other truths Boston might have thought about: Truth #1: He’s her boss Truth #2: She just accepted a job at his mother’s new winery Truth #3: He’s always had a crush on her Even though Boston is no longer El’s grumpy boss, they still work together at his mom’s winery. And while sparks are flying as they get to know each other for real, El’s kind of sweet on the guy who always seems to know just what to say via text too. Obviously, things will come to a head. Will Boston come clean about the flirty texts being from him? Or will El figure out on her own that she’s been Texting With the Enemy?

"Strip naked." He commands with an authoritative seductive voice. "Huh! Why?" I asked because his outburst is surprising. "Just..." His voice trailed, as he made his way closer to me. "I want to see you naked." He whispers. I swallowed my saliva hard, as I made my way further inside the suite. Summoning up the courage, I unzip my red gown, while allowing the gown to freely flow down until it touches the floor. He smirks devilishly at me "Touch yourself." He commands. **** Cornelia Jamarreon is a young lady who is diagnosed with stage three cancer. All she ever wanted was to get married before her time on Earth came to an end. Her boyfriend dumped her on her birthday, leaving her so devastated that she ended up having a one-night stand with a stranger she knew nothing about. She awoke the next morning to discover that he had stolen her most valuable jewelry. 'Did I give my virginity to a thief?' She asked herself. "What would happen when Cornelia finally finds her Mister handsome? Will his family members accept her and her son?" "Will Cornelia live happily ever after, or will her cancer take her life?" Find out.....

BE WARNED! 18+ ADULT CONTENT WITHIN!! The smile on her face, the smoothness of her lips, the freshness of her breath and the sweetness between her legs were all he began to think of. Oh, how he longed for that moment of lustful passion he'd be satisfying when he finds his way between her thighs. "I'll have you all night and share you with no one else. I want to make love to you till the break of day!" "Just shut up, lay down on that bed and spread your legs wide open for me. I'd be right back." Meet Justin Smith, the son of Central City's wealthiest man, who owns a slew of businesses including Smith Technology and Enterprise. Justin, a young 26-year-old Billionaire who is well-mannered and well-connected, must marry the daughter of his father's best friend to fulfill his dying mother's wish. He's a cold-blooded man who doesn't express emotion. Valerie Houston is a 24-year-old daughter of the wealthy Houston family who owns a car company. She's determined, diligent, and has a strong spirit. Her parents plan for her to marry one of the wealthy smiths. They have no choice but to follow their parents' instructions. What happens if Valerie and Justin start to fall in love? Will their romance blossom as a result of their love? What happens if Valerie's ex-boyfriend Scott, a well-known burglar, comes after her to reclaim her? Will the cold-hearted Justin be able to save Valerie? Will she play the role of Juliet, and he will play the role of Romeo? In this exciting, mind-blowing, love-filled, and romantic narrative, you'll find out!

Savannah Abad, daughter of a well-respected attorney, is dubbed by the public as the perfect daughter. Classy, beautiful, responsible, and sharp. Everyone adored her. All along they've thought that life was easy for her but it's the total opposite. She was tailored to be that perfect daughter image in order to protect her father's reputation. Things were rough for her but she manages to survive throughout the year. When she thought she's already sailing the safe waters, a magnificent wave hit her. Her world was turned upside-down. It made her question herself. All those years she've been through polishing her image and so as her father will be wasted with just one temptation.

Si Crisanta ay may matagal ng pangarap na maging isang sikat na news writer kaya naman madalas siyang tumambay sa opisina ng kanyang ninong na hepe ng pulisya sa kanilang bayan upang makasagap ng scoop or balita. Dito niya unang nakita ang gwapo at makisig na pulis na si Sergeant Alexander Ricarfort, pangalan pa lang ang kisig na. Tinamaan ka agad siya ng palaso ni kupido lalo na ng masalat niya kung gaano "katambok" at "katigas" ang abs nito. Gumawa siya ng paraan para mapalapit sa binata at ng makakuha na rin siya ng magandang article para sa kanilang newspaper. ayun nga lang mukhang lagi siyang inaalat, dahil sa tuwing mag lalapit sila ni Alex ay kung ano-ano namang kapalpakan ang nagagawa niya na lalong ikinainis ng binata sa kanya. Paano pa kaya siya magugustuhan ni Alex kung lahat ng gusto nito sa isang babae ay wala sa kanya? idagdag pa na meron na pala itong "babe". Wala na nga kayang pag-asa ang mapagmahal na puso ni Cris para sa makisig nating pulis?

Evelyn Ithaca, a single mother, moves with her son back to her hometown in the hope of things getting better for them. She, being a powerful witch, has ‘supposedly' been saving her son's life as he seems to have a terrible sickness only her magic can keep at bay. Things got a little weird for Evelyn when she began to develop feelings for Damon, a young handsome werewolf whom she has eight years on. Their relationship starts up swiftly and is repeatedly interrupted by no one else but her ex, who happens to be the Principal at her son's school...and apparently more. Lucas, her son, manages to get himself into a relationship with Tilda and it is even weirder than his mother's own as the love triangle which he finds himself in happens to have his newly found buddy in it.