you re so old jokes one liners

Who would show up? When are they going to appear? What do they desire? Maya Asher has just turned twenty three in the year 2023... Thomas Roman was reborn in the year 1919. He become a watchful vampire guardian. He had been Maya Asher 's guardian since the moment of her birth, watching from between realities. Trying to remain unnoticed but bound by a blood oath. Their love wil be tested from the moment of that electrifying touch...that magical kiss...

ASTRID YU, a washed-up, burnt-out former child actress, starts a YouTube vlog in an attempt to stay relevant in PH mainstream media. She collaborates with a local coffee shop, Brew Blends, so she could make her content for one of her vlog's many series (“Be a Barista with Me!"). However, she gains a following for all the wrong reasons—her viewers ship her with the coffee shop's owner, ENRIQUE LEE. Which would've been fine… if he hadn't been the infamous high school sweetheart she left behind for the sake of her acting career. Not to mention that after all this time, Astrid is still deeply in love with him. And Lee? Well, Lee hates her guts.

It is a one night mistake, a mistake that she will never regret. Nagbunga ang isang gabing pagkakamali na nagawa ni Mikaya kasama ang estrangherong nakilala niya sa bar. Nang matuklasan niyang siya'y buntis ay agad siyang nakipaghiwalay sa kanyang kasintahan at piniling umuwi ng probinsya dahil na rin sa kagustuhan ng kanyang mga magulang. Naging masaya ang buhay niya kasama ng kanyang anak. Ngunit sadyang mapaglaro ang tadhana, dahil walang sikretong hindi nabubunyag. Nalaman ng kanyang dating kasintahan na mayroon siyang anak at handa nitong panagutan ang bata sa pag-aakalang siya ang ama nito. Handa na ba siyang sabihin ang katotohanan? O hayayaan niyang kilalanin ng kanyang anak ang taong hanggang ngayon ay mahal pa rin niya. But love cannot make two person stays with secrets and lies. Would a woman like her ready to reveal the whole truth?

Her twin gets missing on her eighteenth birthday. The Fae court seems to be hiding something about her sister disappearance and her recluse father acts like he doesn't care. Left with no option, A powerless Fae journeys to find her sister. Discovering secrets and even secrets admirers on the way.

" I don't care if your name sounds like hell, I'm willing to enter hell just to bring you to heaven. Because you are my Hella." ONE HELLA NIGHT Hella Alexandrea Mondeñego, just graduated and pass the bar exam on becoming a lawyer. For the last time, before she will be serious and say goodbye to her spoiled and party goer self, she goes to the club with her friends. Having the best night, saying goodbye to her social life and to fulfill her promise to her parents. She had a blast party, not knowing that she will have a one hella night, just like her name. And that night, her life changes. She knew being a lawyer is already dangerous. But being held and protected by a secret man that she doesn't know, that he is a Mafia boss. This man, who was always by her side. Who's always protecting her secretly without her knowing, she got curious and that curiosity got her more in danger. A danger of falling in love, with the man she thought her ideal man.A man who has secrets.

What inspired you to write One Promise? You see, when I was young, life was tough. I grew up with a broken family. I never felt the love I wanted all my life. I've always love reading. That's when I found my new comfort through writing. Then I held on to it because it gave me hope. It gave me another way to ease my broken self cause I needed to. Just when I thought I already hit rock bottom with all these pain I felt ever since I was a kid, God must've still felt the need to push me more by leaving me with a monstrous dad but I saw how God changes him. So I wrote this story for my dad.

"I'm a jerk, but you stole my heart"---->Derek"I'm a better person when i'm around you"---->Halsey"I fell in love with you because you loved me when I couldn't love myself"---->NicholasBut what shocked me the most were Alec's words..."I want you. All of you. Your flaws. Your mistakes. Your imperfections. I want you and only you."---->Alec Brad.It all started when i agreed to move in with them. The four bad ass of Greenville. Currently, i had been forced to attend a party with them and we were all playing truth and dare at the moment with other high schoolers.The bottle was spun around and it landed between me and Alec. I was to ask the question."Truth or dare?" I say slightly slurring on my words due to the little drinks i had taken."Truth" he replies with a lot of confidence, smirking at me, his green eyes holding my gaze.This was the perfect time to ask him what has always been bothering me. And then my question rolls out of my tongue."When was your last kiss?"He seemed shocked with the question but covers it up quickly with an evil smile, as he searches around for something, or maybe someone. Having found it, he turned around to face me and answered my question."Now"And with that, he pulls me up in a swift movement, grabs my waist, draws me closer to him,and then you can imagine what happens next. My asshole is kissing me.

Sa araw na nakipag divorce si Calista Everhart, ang divorce papers niya ay kumalas sa internet, at naging headline agad ito. Ang rason ng divorce ay nakahighlight ng pula. “Baog ang asawa, kaya hindi mabigay ang pangangailangan ng asawa.” Sa gabing yun, ang asawa niya, si Lucian Northwood, ay hinuli siya sa stairwell. Ang boses nito ay mababa habang sinabi sa kanya, “Papatunayan ko sayo na hindi ako baog…”

I'm only sixteen ng makilala ko si Franz Zorego, ang hot business man na mas matanda sakin ng s'yam na taon. Unang kita ko pa lang sa kanya nasabi ko agad sa sarili ko na itong ang lalaking mamahalin ko. Kaya naman ginawa ko ang lahat para akalain nito na nasa tamang edad na ako. Pero hindi naitatago ang sikreto ng matagal na panahon. Dahil natuklasan nito na isa lang akong highschool student sa paaralang mismong pag aari ng kanilang pamilya. Mula noon ay umiwas na ito sa akin at 'di na ako pinapansin. Aaminin ko nasasaktan ako sa pag iwas nito pero anong magagawa ng isang gaya ko? Sabi nga nila isa lang akong hamak na bata na pagdating ng panahon mawawala at mababago rin ang nararamdaman. Totoo ba ang gano'n? Paano kung hindi?

In the darkness of the night, a 26-year-old fashion designer counters the murder of an innocent woman in the city of love. She is confronted with the most horrific scenario by the biggest mafia in France, which gets her in trouble. Daniel Richman, 28, is MI6 agent assigned to find the head of French mafia gang leader Tiago Pablo. However, he is backstabbed by someone he must investigate, he meets a mysterious woman named Rania. She doubts him yet at the same time is attracted to the English man and cannot stop thinking about him. Daniel is drawn to the lady and he finds himself drawn to her within these short hours, and before he knows it, he's in love with her. What will happen when the night is over? Will they stay together or will they part ways like strangers do?