All Chapters of Darkness: Chapter 1 - Chapter 10

VOLUME ONE: GUILTPrologueHave you ever had a moment of complete irony? I once looked up what the definition was. According to Siri irony was, and I quote,"a state of affairs or an event that seems deliberately contrary to what one expects and is often amusing as a result". Irony is amusing? I don't think so. Irony can be cruel and hurtful and completely damaging. For me anyways. You see six months ago I would have thought Irony was just a word in the English Dictionary that everyone knew, but couldn't exactly put words to explain. Now I know what Irony truly means, I'm living it.LayniePain slices through the back of my head at an alarming rate. I can hear a voice in the background, but am unsure of what it is saying. My back lands hard on the kitchen floor. God, I hate our hardwood flooring. Of course, Jared had to have the most expensive hardwood floor that cost sixteen hundred dollars a square foot. I'm not sure why, but when we moved in, he was very specific about what

JaredMy head throbs, my back is on fire, and I have no idea what's going on. It feels worse than the time I woke up hungover after my twenty first birthday party. My best friend Alan threw me a surprise party. Laynie and Anna weren't old enough to drink yet, so we celebrated with a few college buddies. We all woke up feeling like death and were in the middle of grocery store parking lot with homeless signs stapled to our stomachs. We never did remember what the hell happened the night before.I try to open my eyes but they are so heavy I just keep falling back asleep. Around the third try, I finally get enough strength to open them just slightly. What I see around me surprises, and put me at ease at the same time. I'm in a damn hospital. No one around to ask why, but I can finally pin point the smell. When my mother died of breast cancer I was in the hospital with her every day until her last. Being only seventeen, I ended up skipping school quite a bit. I had to. I was the only one

JaredMy eyes slowly drift open. The pain is still intense, but I no longer feel like I am going to pass out after each breathe. The room is quiet and I wonder how long I've been out this time. I drifted in and out all day yesterday and if it weren't for nurse Candice coming in before her shift ended this morning I would have never known we have officially been here one day. I also asked nurse Candice how Laynie was and when I would get to see her. She smiled and told me to turn to my right. I did so, slowly, by her request, and never have my eyes seen a more beautiful sight. She lied there, in her own bed, which was not there the before, with her hands holding the pillow very tightly. She always did like sleeping like that. When I told Nurse Candice that, she smiled and told me to take care and left. She seems to have a story, but I'm not one to pry."Your awake."My thoughts of this morning are cut off by the voice I've been yearning to hear for the past 24 hours. I look to my right

LaynieOnce we got home and Jared settled on the couch, I walk over to the kitchen to start dinner. Partly because Jared and Alan should be hungry, and partly because I really need to keep busy. Being back here where this whole thing transpired, has enraged me with mixed emotions. When we first walked in the door I noticed all the blood was cleaned up and the furniture arranged back to where it belonged. It feels good to be here and not be belittled or beaten for any little thing but at the same time I'm walking on eggshells. What if the real him comes back in the middle of the night? What if he just turns into him mechanically again? What if he is just being truly genuine to me? I burry myself in making curry and rice.One thing I wanted more than anything in the world was to one day have my own restaurant. I have my culinary arts certificate and was a sous chef when we were back in Minneapolis. Jared had his contracting license and a job working with a buddy's father. we were doing w

LaynieI take my time in the shower feeling hesitant about my upcoming talk with my husband. Jared scared me earlier to the point where I went into my safe space. Whenever Jared got drunk and wanted to fight with me, that was where I went. The first time was an accident. He had shoved me in the kitchen when I refused to remake a dish that was completely fine. I fell into the little space between the refrigerator and the pantry doors. The space couldn't have been more than a foot wide but when Jared saw that I was trapped in there he left me alone. From that point on whenever he would get violent in a drunken state I would hide in there. It killed my back each time and I usually got scratches when trying to come out but it was better than the alternative. Way better. Once the water gets too cold for my body, I leave the bathroom and go back into the bedroom. I put on my comfy pajamas of gray flannel sweats and a black tank. I stopped wearing night gowns when Jared told me that I was