I could feel my head hurting as I sat up in my bed. My throat felt painful and really dry. For some reason, my eyes felt puffy, as if I was crying. I lifted the covers that were covering me off and put my feet to the ground. As soon as I did that I collapsed onto the floor.
My body felt so weak and my stomach was hurting so much like I haven’t eaten in a while. I was so confused about what was happening. From the corner of my eye, I saw a mirror showing a small figure.
I turned around to face the mirror fully and felt even more confused. The mirror showed a girl in a nightgown, who looked to be ten years old and skinny to the point her cheeks were sunken in. I realize that I had long curly brown hair that reached my lower back. My skin was dark but seemed rather pale as if I haven’t seen the sun in a while.
What drew me in was my dark and seemingly empty brown eyes. It reminds me of my own eyes. The eyes that stop believing in people and everything. That the type of eyes I was looking at. I slowly reach a hand up to my face and feel my breathing quicken once I realize the reflection in the mirror copy me.
‘This isn’t right... This isn’t right! THIS ISN’T RIGHT!’ I tried to stand up quickly but could only fall back onto the ground. My legs felt so weak but I was trying so hard to get up. I tried to say something but my voice couldn’t make a sound. All I could do was curl onto the floor and tried to get my breathing back to normal.
Once my breathing was under control, I thought everything would get better but I was wrong. My head started to hurt so much that I felt like I was going to die. I could hear someone screaming in pain. It was so loud and sounded so hurt. After a few seconds, I realized it was me screaming.
I could hear footsteps coming quickly towards me but I was too distracted by the pain I was feeling. I could feel myself get picked up by someone and hear a voice trying to speak to me but I just held my head that wouldn’t stop hurting.
I could feel myself being carried quickly toward somewhere and other countless voices. I couldn’t take the pain anymore so I decided to just close my eyes. I could see countless images flashing through my eyes.
I could see a female who felt familiar to me appeared in countless images. She always had a frown on her face. I realize that person was me. The real me. The me who had no parents. The me who was always getting in fights. The me who had no one on my side except me.
I could see myself playing a game in some of the images. I remember that game. It was the only thing I enjoyed. ‘Wait... That girl in the game looked familiar to the girl in the mirror.. ‘ I realize in the images the girl from the mirror was also from the game.
Aurelia Giliam... That is her name. She was the villainess of the game. She hated the heroine so much. She did countless things just to mess up her chances. Even though she was always causing trouble for me in the game. I could only feel a sense of kinship with her.
She was like me. Even though she had a family, they didn’t want anything to do with her. Her father hated her for taking the life of the only woman he loved and her older brother didn’t want anything to do with her. She was simply something everyone didn’t care for.
I remember feeling guilty with one of the routes where I went after the only person she felt could care for her... In the end, she killed herself after being harshly rejected by the only person she loved. I remember feeling bad for a few weeks after that route.
Now it seems like I am this tragic character... Fuck.
After a while of getting back memories from my past life and Aurelia's life, I finally woke up. I was in a hospital bed. My head no longer felt like it was getting split open and my stomach didn’t feel hungry anymore. I was looking around the room not expecting to see anyone.
‘I doubt the old man will be here. Seeing how he got her a house to live in by herself with only servants to keep her company... He may not even come to check on her. Probably will send someone to give her a message.’ I closed my eyes and tried to remember the things from the otome game I played. The game was called “A Highschool Royal Romance”.
The game was about how an orphan who found out she was the missing daughter of a noble family. She was taken back into the family with open arms. Since she was back with her family she had to go to a school where only the most important and richest people could go.
I felt a bit more relaxed knowing that the game took place during the modern-day so I wouldn’t have to worry about dealing with a different era. I know that there are a total of five love interests, one of them being a hidden character. I was just getting to the hidden character route before... I can’t remember what happened to me. Did I die?
‘I remember I came home from my job and I was soaked in water from a sudden downpour. I remember taking a bath that lasted for an hour before finally getting out. I decided to play the game for a while so I could get closer to figuring out who the hidden character was. Then I remembered...’ I could feel my head start to hurt when I tried to remember beyond that.
I was grabbing at my head as another painful headache came up and couldn’t focus on anything. I felt myself snap back to focus once I felt someone touch my arm. I quickly looked at what touched me and saw a worried expression on an older woman. I didn’t let my guard down right away until I realized it was a caretaker of Aurelia, Mae.
She raised Aurelia ever since she was born after her father wanted nothing to do with her. She was in her forties, but she still had a youthful look to her. She always had her blonde hair up in a neat bun. Her skin was covered in freckles that were able to be seen rather clearly with her fair skin.
She looked like she hadn't slept well in a while and I couldn’t help but feel bad for her. I opened my mouth to say something to her but all that accomplished was me coughing violently. Mae quickly was at my side with a bottle of water in her hand. “Please drink some water. You must be so thirsty.”
I took the water with shaky hands and drank from it. My dry throat was feeling better already and I handed the water back to a worried Mae. “...I’m sorry for causing you trouble, Mae.” From what I receive from Aurelia's memories she wasn’t eating anything until her father came to visit her.
No matter how much everyone begged her, she wouldn’t change her mind. She just wanted to see her father. ‘...Yet, he ignored her pleas for attention and let her starve.’ I had a feeling that Aurelia had died from nothing eating in such a long time. She wasn’t here anymore, only me.
“I was so worried about you, Aurelia! You wouldn’t wake up for four days and I was worried that you-!” Mae stopped herself from finishing that sentence by covering her mouth with her hands with a fearful expression on her face. She looked unsteady as she stood there and I was worried she would collapse onto the floor.
I raised a hand to place it on her hands and tried not to react to how thin my hand looked. I slowly pulled it off her mouth and held it in my thin hands. I rub her shaking hands slowly, hoping to calm her down.
After a while, she stopped shaking and I stopped holding her hands. “Can I go home?” I felt uneasy being in this hospital room. Even if it wasn’t my home I was returning to, I would rather be there than here.
“The doctor has to check on you, just to make sure everything is alright.” Mae went out of the room to find a doctor and I was left there by myself again. I felt a different range of emotions going through me at the moment, trying to handle this new situation I was in.
‘Aurelia is the villainess of the otome game I enjoyed playing. She never had a good ending even if the heroine got a bad ending. She is a character not allowed to have happiness. I am here now but I won’t let my fate in the game happen to me.’ I was squeezing the covers on top of me tightly to the point my knuckles whiten. I wouldn’t allow myself to die just because I was the villainess. I will survive and find a happy ending.
I was laying back onto the hospital bed, looking up at the ceiling, with a dull expression on my face. Mae was still gone and I was growing bored of just waiting. I was going to try to get up from the bed when I heard footsteps coming towards my room.I looked at the door, expecting Mae to come through the door, but was proven wrong when I realized it was “my father” and “my older brother”. They didn’t have any expression on their face as they stared at me. I just gave them an empty stare back, not caring enough to speak to them.“My older brother”, Erik Giliam, was a serious-looking, glasses-wearing boy. He was two years older than me. Even though he hasn't grown completely yet, he is still a pretty-looking boy. His light green eyes stood out on his tan skin. His brown hair was neatly combed and style adding onto his serious-looking nature.“My father”, M
“Aurelia! I was so worried when I heard you were sent to the hospital! Are you okay? Are you still in pain?” Eli was getting too close to me with that snot covered face so I, not hiding it, move away from him with a disgusted and annoyed expression. Even though his face was so gross looking to me right now I could see how he was “attractive” to Aurelia in the first place.With a face that still had baby fat, I could see deep blue eyes that I am surprised someone so young has. His light caramel skin went well with his light blonde hair. As I keep on looking at him I notice that his feet were off the ground as he fully lay on my bed. I could see he was currently wearing a white floral dress with white ribbons holding his hair up into pigtails.He gave off an expression of an innocent child who could never hurt anyone. I narrow my eyes at the thought, feeling my heart tighten as I continue to look at Eli. I c
I spent the last few days at my house relaxing and waiting for my body to be at one hundred percent. While I was relaxing I was, unfortunately, visited by my “precious” childhood friend. He would bring me different types of gifts to help me get better.The servants in my house found it cute how considerate he was being but I could only see him in a negative light. I will never fully trust him. I won’t trust anyone who is involved in a way with my death in the game. I have to be careful around them.After a few days of me not doing anything, my 'father' sent me my usual tutor to make sure I was being kept up to pace with everything. From Aurelia's memories, she didn’t enjoy studying at all. She could never be good enough in her 'father's' eyes. Only her 'brother' was the perfect child so she always hid away from her tutor and never did her work.Seeing as I
It was in the middle of the night and my only light source was a candle that I found in the house. I was sitting in the middle of my bedroom with my black book in front of me. I tried to once again open it but stopped once I realized it wasn’t going to budge.“Okay... From the books I read on magic and dark magic if I want to get started with it I have to give up something of myself… It must be talking about blood since I don’t know what else I could give up from myself.” I lift a needle that I stole from Mae sewing kit and stab myself in the finger with it.I held the finger dripping with blood over my black blood and let my blood fall onto it. My blood landed on the book and I looked at it with focused eyes, waiting for something to happen. I was getting irritated when nothing happened after a few minutes and was going to get off the ground when the candle in front of me went out.
I was standing in front of my huge closet that was in my bedroom. I had a frown on my face when I saw all the bright-looking dresses. I went further into this closet hoping I could at least find something that was dark. I was going to give up hope and grab a random dress from the closet when I saw something that stuck out from the colorful dresses.Getting the dark clothing from the line of clothes I held it in front of me. It was a black dress with white lines near the end of the dress. I felt satisfied with what I was holding and took it out of the closet with me so I could wear it for dinner.After I was done picking out my outfit I decided to go back to the black book that my teacher gave me and try to see if I could teach myself a spell. I held the book in my hand for a few seconds before finally opening it. I could feel a small smile on my face when the book opened easily.When I looke
I spent two months in my house slowly expanding my knowledge of the world. My magic was getting better but it wasn’t perfect. I could still hear that voice appear in my head often but I always manage to push them back down.I was currently having a lesson with my tutor who was impressed with how much I improve over the two months since I got into this body. He was currently teaching me stuff that was more suited for children who were older than me.“I am impressed with how you are progressing in your studies. Your magic is above average as well. I wonder if you were able to do this before, why didn’t you?” My tutor was currently looking through assignments he gave me with pleased eyes. I felt satisfied that he was impressed with how I was doing. But it wasn’t enough. Everything had to be better than everyone.“I was too focused on getting atten
Eli became even clinger after my ‘birthday party’. It is weird to have him always hugging my arm, hugging my waist, and just hugging all over. Is he trying to do something? Also, I am not liking that intense look in his eyes whenever he thinks I am not looking at him.He would always invite me over to his home so that I could watch him dress up in his clothing. He would even make me choose what he should wear telling me, “I want to dress in a way that you enjoy. Your opinion matters to me after all.”It didn’t help that he blushed when he said that to me. I don’t know what is happening to him at all. I mean as long as he isn’t trying to mess with me I will, unfortunately, allow this to continue but I am going to figure out a way for him not to always be in my personal space. It gets uncomfortable if he is always close to me.After my &lsq
I was in my house library studying and taking notes of things I didn’t understand so I could ask my tutor to explain it to me when we came at the usual time. I increased my studying time after I met that prick, Colton.I had to take a deep breath as I remembered him and made sure to get my emotions under control. I don’t want to lose to that dick. I have to keep my studying up so he will not catch up with me. I would rather bite my tongue off than lose to that stuck up dick.As I was reading through a book on the history of how magic came to be I heard the door to the library open. I didn’t bother looking up, assuming it was one of my servants here to leave me a little snack. After a few minutes of silence, I realized that the person who came into the room didn’t leave and I could feel them looking at me with intense eyes.Looking up from my book with a little b
Do you know how it feels to wake up from a deep sleep? Like a sleep that seems like it wasn’t that long but your body is stiff and you are thirsty. And you just need to brush your teeth because it is not a good feeling at the moment.I was currently dealing with that and it was strange. My body felt well rested but at the same time, it felt super sore. I was having a hard time understanding what time it was, where I am, or the meaning of everything in the world. I could feel something wet on my face and I just knew it was drool, gross.Before I could even handle that, I felt myself getting tackled. I was not expecting it and I could feel all the air leaving my lungs. I was confused and still half asleep. Someone was talking but all I could hear was just a bunch of mumbles. I could hear them but the words didn’t make sen
I didn’t know how I was going to get back to where my body was. I was in a space I didn’t know how I got into so it was hard leaving this space. Even though it was bright and covered in daisies, I couldn’t stay here any longer.I am pretty sure this was a place that was supposed to consume me in all my negative emotions but I managed to kind of handle them. There is still some stuff I need to deal with but not right now.‘The creature that is made up of the souls of all the dead dark magic users probably have my body close to them. It would make sense since they are trying to make me join the other souls as well…’ I was struggling to figure out how I could get out of this place I was in when I felt something hit the
I am Aurelia Giliam, I am hated by my family and I crave to feel any type of love. I am stuck in an endless cycle of trying to get the love of people who I know will never give me it. I am bitter, I am angry. I hate this. I am Alina. I don’t have a last name. My mommy family doesn’t want me to have their surname and I hate saying my father's last name as well. I felt love from my mommy, that love of her was so warm and so pure. I wanted to experience that love again so I kept my heart open… Until I reached a point where my heart was broken to a point I couldn’t fix it anymore. I met a boy with a kind smile and love for me but… I pushed him away. I lost him. I lost my mommy. It hurts so much. I am so lonely. My role in this world was the villainess, I was made to suffer so other people could fall in love. Even if I try to change my fate it wouldn’t e
‘Please don’t! Give me back my child! Kill me instead! I am begging you!’ I could hear a voice of a woman calling out all around me. She was crying and it just made me feel so uncomfortable, I didn’t like hearing that at all. Crying reminded me of my mommy… ‘I don’t want to die! Please don’t kill me! Why are you doing this?!’ I am hearing a different voice this time, it sounds like a man who seems very fearful. I wonder who he is calling out to? ‘I hate you! I hate all of you! I will make everyone pay for this! Do you think I am a monster? I will show you a REAL MONSTER!’ I can’t tell if the per
I am humming to myself as I stand on a stepping stool. My hands are so sticky but I am almost done with the sandwich for my mommy. It took me forever but I finally managed to cut them into heart shapes! There were a few close calls with the knife but I didn’t get hurt at all! Mommy will be so proud of me.I placed my heart-shaped sandwiches on the plate alongside the heart-shaped pancakes! I thought for a second before deciding to put my weirdly shaped waffle on the plate as well. It took me so long to make it and I am proud it came out so well unlike the other ones that weren’t cooked all the way.To finish it off I decided to add the rolled omelet that I added a smiley face to. I couldn’t keep the smile off my face when I was done with everything for my mommy. I couldn’t help but picture he
I felt like Merrill became even strange after our time in the forest together. We had to leave early since he was bitten by a snake, but he became clingy. It was like he was another Eli and for some reason, that seemed to upset Eli a lot.But I was too focus on other stuff to really try to understand why he was upset with that. It feels like my past life keeps merging with my current life. I would see things from my past life but they would quickly disappear once I look at them again. It feels like I am in a nightmare that is slowly becoming a part of my reality. I feel like I am going crazy but I don’t know what to do.I am scared… What if I can’t tell the difference between my past life and this life. I know I have to remember my past fully to get over it but I don’t want to feel the pain again. It feels like I
It has been a while since the moment happened between me and Erik. We are at a standstill with each other, it's was not hate and it is was not love either. He doesn’t look at me with scared eyes anymore but I can’t understand the look in his eyes anymore when I catch him looking at me.I don’t want to understand it, I don’t care about how he thinks about me anymore. That a lie, you care. Why do you care still? So pathetic, you make me feel sick. Fucking useless piece of shit…I am also dealing with the angry voice more often. The other two often show up but for some reason, the angry voice keeps showing up more often. It is often hard to tell the difference between my thoughts and their voice. What if one day I am no longer able to tell the difference anymore… I don’t want to t
I was pretty irritated for a few days since the pain from my cramps just wanted to screw me over. Drucilla gave me something for my period so it wouldn’t get in my way as I was training. It did help me not notice I was bleeding from below but it didn’t help me ignore that pain that would appear out of nowhere.This didn’t really help me out when I was cutting my bangs with shaky hands since I didn’t trust myself with the scissors I was using. When I went to cut both of my long bangs a painful cramp appeared out of nowhere and it caused me to cut bangs a bit awkwardly. When I went to fix it another cramp appeared out of nowhere and my bangs became rather short. I decided it was time for me to stop before I stop having bangs.I mean my hair won’t get in the way of training but it feels so weird to have short h
I was breathing heavily as I hid away in a hole in a tree and I could hear the scream of Eli as he was caught. I was covered in sweat and I felt so dirty. My hair wasn’t doing perfect either seeing as I am pretty sure there were leaves and twigs currently in it.“Let see… My precious babies manage to catch one of you. I wonder who they will catch next~?” Drucilla sounded way too cheerful as her voice echoed in the forest we were currently in. I really didn’t understand why the first day of training was us basically running and hiding away from her pack of wolves, it didn’t make sense!How did I go from reading books in the library about my mom's home country with Colton to hiding away from a bunch of wolves and my weird aunt? This doesn’t make sense at all! Shouldn’t we just slowly d