Kabanata 4

NASALO ko ang noo ko, napapikit ako at walang tunog na napatili. Tinakpan ko ang mga mata ko at inangat ang ulo saka sumilip sa pagitan ng daliri ko nang makasiguro kung siya nga ba ito. Para akong nakuryente nang nadatnan kong nasa akin ang mga mata niya, yumuko ulit ako at tinakpan na ang buong mukha.

Shit! Shit! Siya nga!

Agad ako na nagsisi na tinali ko ang buhok ko, wala akong matataguan. Hindi ko alam kung nakilala niya ba ako o hindi, sa sandaling iyon ay gusto kong kainin na lang ako ng sahig dahil sa sitwasyong kinaroroonan ko.

I wanted to see him, I tried to find him through social media but I didn't know what his name was. Why did we have to see each other again in this kind of situation? He was wearing a formal attire and holding an attache case and another one which seemed like a laptop case. I only took a glimpse of him but I was so sure it was him, I couldn't be mistaken.

Who knew your one night stand would turn out to be your teacher to the school you transferred in.

"Uh, excuse me?" I remembered his voice all too well. It was really him, no doubt. I remembered the same strict and authoritative tone. "Are you the transfer student, miss?"

I panicked, I had no idea what to do, my heart was racing too damn fast. I was scared to see his reaction if ever he recognized me.

But what if I acted like I didn't recognize him? I was drunk that night so that could be my excuse. Was I already too late? Because I did already embarrass myself there and I already caught his attention.

Huminga ako ng malalim, dahan-dahan kong tinaas ang katawan ko at inalis ang kamay sa mukha. Umayos ako ng upo, tumitingin-tingin sa paligid bago iangat ang ulo at mabigat ang loob na kinita ang mga mata niya. Halata ang pagkagulat sa mga mata niya subalit nanatili ang normal na ekspresyon ng mukha niya.

He shuffled on his feet, he cleared his throat and it echoed against the four corners of the room. His hand went to his hair, brushing his fingers through it like he was frustrated. In my eyes, I felt like he was panicking as well like I was.

Napahawak ako sa leeg ko at agad na nag-iwas ng tingin, hindi ko kayang magpanggap. Ang daming tumatakbo sa isip ko, at unang-una na duon kung may nakapansin ba sa pagkataranta naming dalawa. Baka may nakahalata sa amin lalo na't nasa akin ang tingin ng lahat dahil sa kahihiyan ko.

Just a moment ago I was the center of attention because I'm a pretty transfer student, now they were whispering and giggling about the loud thud of my forehead hitting the desk.

"What's... what's your name?" God, everything about this was awkward!

"U-uhm, S-samantha Clarkson." My voice was shaking grievously, I felt like crying.

He didn't ask any further question and proceeded to greet his students good morning. Everyone stoop up and greeted him back while I stayed seated because my legs were too weak and shaking. I was still in shock and in disbelief.

Bakit kaylangan ko pa siyang maging guro? Anong mangyayari kapag may nakaalam na nakipagtalik ako sa kaniya isang Linggo pa lang ang nakalipas. At kung tama ang pagkakaalala ko ay may fiancé na siya 'diba?

Nagsimula siyang mag-discuss sa klase, hindi ko alam kung saan siya nakakuha ng lakas loob na makapagturo nang maayos dahil ako ay walang maintindihan na tinuro niya nang kahit isa man lang. Tanging Conceptual Framework lang ang narinig ko at wala ng iba pa.

He was teaching Practical Research, the subject I hated the most, and he even presented us an assignment for tommorow. But I didn't understand anything he taught us.

He dismissed us early, saying goodbye and reminding us about our homework. I wiped the sweats on my forehead by the back of my hand, I quickly rose from my seat with my backpack.

"Transfer student?"

I halted, swallowed and slowly looked at his direction. Everyone was already leaving the room politely, Stephanie stopped at the door and waited for me.

He walked to his main table on the upper right corner of the room, his fingers brushing against the hardwood of his table.

"I need you to stay for a bit, Miss Clarkson. I just need you fill something up." He was talking to me telepathically, I understood his intention but I wasn't mentally ready to talk about our situation.

Bahagya kong pinilig ang ulo sa kaniya.

"Mabilis lang 'to."

Bumaling ako kay Stephanie na naghihintay sa pinto, nagpalipat-lipat ang tingin ko sa kanilang dalawa.

"Uh, Steph, mauna ka nalang muna. Susunod lang ako, may kaylangan lang akong fill-up-an." Sa huli ay pinili kong manatili, sa tingin ko ay mabuti na pag-usapan ito kahit na hindi pa ako handa. Mas maaga itong masosolusyunan kung maaga ring mapag-uusapan.

"Ah, okay, okay. Hihintayin kita sa next class, ha?" Kumaway siya at umalis na.

At last, the room was empty and the only person inside was my teacher and I.

I walked towards him, folding my arms over my chest as my eyes caught the name tag on his right chest.

Elliot Villamore.

That was his name.

"Samantha."

I licked my lower lip and bit it unconsciously, forcing myself to meet his gaze. I raised my eyebrows, he motioned his hand to the seat near him. Catching what he was conveying, I pulled a chair and placed it infront of his table and took a seat.

"You're... studying here?" He was the first one to open up about the subject.

I nodded. "Yeah, w-we moved here. D-dito ka pala nakatira?"

He just hummed. "About what happened last week-"

"You have a fiancé." Binukas ko sa kaniya ang mas dapat naming pag-usapan. "You weren't drunk that night, ikaw pa ang nag-aya na makipagsex even though my fiancé ka na."

Nagsalubong ang kilay niya, naupo siya sa upuan niya at may kinuha na papel sa isang folder. It was his attendance list, he listed my name in the last with a clean, smooth and cursive penmanship.

"I don't think you have any business about my relationship with my fiancé. It was just a one-night stand, let's leave it at that."

Napatango ako sa kaniyang bilang pagsang-ayon. "Yes, it was just a one night stand. Kalimutan nalang natin 'yon, let's pretend like nothing happened. Wala kang pagsasabihan, 'diba?"

"Nakasalalay rin trabaho, reputasyon at relasyon ko rito, wala akong pagsasabihan." Inabot niya sa akin ang papel, nagtataka kong tinanggap ito.

Natigilan ako nang aksidenteng nagkahawak ang kamay naming dalawa. Parehas kami ng naging sunod na akson, mabilis naming binawi ang kamay nantila napaso ng nagbabagang apoy at sabay ring napatikhim.

"Put your age along with your contact number and guardian's beside your name."

Ako na ang kumuha ng ballpen dahil baka maulit pa ang nangyari kapag inabot niya pa ulit ito sa akin. Sinulat ko ang edad ko, contact number at kinaylangan ko pang ilabas ang phone ko para kopyahin ang number ni Papa.

Iniwan ko sa table ang papel at ballpen, binawi niya ito at saka binasa. His brow suddenly raised, the right side of his lips tugged upwards. My heart's beat fasten, I became flustered just for that reason.

"You're nineteen years old," he stated.

"Yeah... and?" I asked, confused.

"You said you're twenty."

My eyes widened in realization. I did lie about my age, but that didn't matter now. "I was drunk, hindi ko alam mga pinagsasabi ko non. And I will be turning twenty this year, so?"

He held his chin, his finger tapping his jaw lightly while staring at me. He bit his lower lip and I unknowingly followed the movement of it.

I wouldn't deny the fact that his looks were mesmerizing. He was really handsome and hot, too. At that moment, everything that happened between us that night flashbacked in my head. How his lips tasted, the how he kissed me fiercely and touched sensually. He was my first sex and if I going be honest with myself, I don't even regret that I did it with him.

He was so good, I could still remember the pleasure and ecastasy I felt while he was licking and sucking my skin while we were doing it in the backseat of his car at the parking lot. My legs were shaking after we tried every position, I even lost track of how many times I climaxed. Even though I was under the influence of alcohol, I still remembered every detail of that unforgettable night.

I uncomfortably pressed my thigh together, that part of my body was starting to get wet from all that recalling and thinking. I unconsciously bit my lower lip again, I just realized it when I caught him staring at my lips. His eyes immediately went back to my eyes, he gave me the same look he'd given me that night.

The experience made me crazy, sex was so good and addicting, I couldn't believe I kept turning down my past boyfriends when they asked for it. But maybe that's the problem. After experiencing sex with him, I tried to do it with a random guy at the bar the next day. He was also handsome, hot and a good kisser. But he didn't felt right to me so I stopped. I only kept thinking about Sir Villamore.

He'd been stuck in my head for quite awhile now, I even tried to find him in social media because I liked him, because I thought he's single. But he wasn't, he had a fiancé and he basically just cheated on her with me.

Wala na akong kinalaman duon 'diba? Hindi ko alam na may fiancé siya at wala ring relasyon na namamagitan sa amin ni Sir Villamore. One-night stand lang iyon, nothing more and nothing less. I liked him only because of sex.

Naistorbo kami nang biglang may nagsidatingan na estudyante sa labas ng silid. Second class niya ito kaya tumayo na ako, nagbibitaw ng buntong hininga habang inaayos ang tindig.

"You may take your leave, Miss Clarkson," he said.

"T-thanks." I excused myself and quickly jogged out of the classroom.

The hallways were already starting to get flooded by students who were going to their second period classes. I leaned sideways on the wall, catching my heart and feeling the loud drumming of my heart from nervousness.

I wasn't ready for that, I'm glad I survived in there. I'm just glad that was all settled now and we agreed to foget everything about what happened between us.

But how do I suppose to do that when I'm always thinking of him and sex?

Bakit inakala ko na mas magiging payapa at tahimik ang buhay ko sa eskwelahan? May galit ba sa akin si Lord at kung ano-ano nalang ang mga nangyayari sa buhay ko? Arranging a fucking big coincidence in my life.

"OY, TOTOO? Isasama mo talaga ako mag-mall?" Ikalawang beses nang nagtanong si Stephanie habang nakasunod siya na likod ko, papalabas na kami ng school gate. "Teka, wala ka bang dalang kotse ngayon?"

"That was my Papa's car, hiniram ko lang kahapon." Walang ganang sagot ko, humihinto sa pavement kasama ng ibang estudyante para maghintay ng jeep.

"Hay, mabuti nalang! Nakakatakot ka kasing mag-drive, teh."

Napatingin ako sa kaniya, masama ang tingin dahil inakala kong binibiro niya lang ako pero mukha siyang seyoso sa sinabi. Napabuntong hininga ako at bumagsak ang balikat sa pagkadismaya.

"What do you mean nakakatakot akong magdrive?"

"Bigla ka nalang bumibilis at bumabagal, minsan paggewang-gewang ka pang magmaneho." She said with one hand poised on her hip. "Ano bang gagawin natin sa mall?"

"Syempre kakain at magsha-shopping. Ano pa bang ginagawa sa mall bukod duon?" Napailing ako sa kaniya.

Maaga kaming dinis-miss ng teacher namin sa last period kaya halos aming section lang ang nasa labas. May iba rin namang mga klase na maagang pinalabas bukod sa amin pero malawak pa rin ang espasyo sa paligid.

Kaylangan ko nga talagang magshopping ngayon, kaylangan ko rin ng kasamang makakausap nang sa gayon ah makalimutan ko kahit panandalian man lang ang aking pinoproblema tungkol kay Mr. Villamore. Kaylangan ko ng pagkakaabalahan.

May fiancé siya, hindi iyon mawala sa isipan ko dahil pakiramdam ko ay nanloko rin ako ng tao. Naki-curious akong malaman kung paano nagawa ni Mr. Villamore iyon sa babaeng pakakasalan niya. Lahat ba talaga ng mga lalaki ay manloloko at mahilig sa sex?

Habang tumatagal ay mas nakukumbinsi lang ako na pare-parehas lang ang mga lalaki sa mundong ibabaw.

"Stephanie?" Bahagya ko siyang siniko sa tabi ko.

"Oh?" Binigay niya sa akin ang buong atensyon niya.

"Anong pangalan ng fiancé ni Mr. Villamore?" I asked it casually, like I was just making a normal conversation at naisipan ko lang magtsismis.

"Oh, ang pangalan niya lang ba? Juliett Smith ang pangalan ng fiancé ni Sir."