BeccaWaking up the next morning, I couldn't stop thinking about how the tension between Neal and I was so high. Last night, he made me feel in a way I hadn't felt in a long time. I felt wanted and desired, and even though I was with James, I couldn't help but contemplate what a relationship with Neal would be like.It was wrong of me, and I was so terribly wrong for even considering things like that.The guilt weighed heavy on me, and I knew for a fact last night when I dressed my door was cracked, and I heard Neal's door shut, so I knew he had seen me, yet he said nothing.Did that make me a whore for being in that kind of situation?Did that make me a worse person because I allowed something like that to happen, knowing full well I wasn't single? God, everything happening to me was turning me more and more into somebody like Tally, somebody who couldn't be trusted, and it was horrible.Standing in the kitchen in front of the coffee pot, I waited for the dark brew to f
Two days later, I fell back into a normal routine. The last thing I wanted was to sit around and preoccupy my mind with things I couldn't change. Instead, I had to focus on school and all the different exams coming up soon.Like a paper I had to write for one of my classes that was literally almost a mile long.To say I had a complicated situation would be an understatement. However, the coffee was finer at the cafe down the street from my home, and what better way to study for the long exam than to surround myself with a comforting atmosphere?I embraced the coziness with coffee, a muffin, and warm inviting aromas of the local cafe.For someone in my situation—alone–this was the perfect place for me to be. I was glad for the atmosphere, and tapping on my keyboard, I searched for the answer I needed.At least that was what I was trying to tell myself.Part of me wished it was a glass of whiskey I was drinking right now, considering how stressed I was. While the other part o
At a loss for words, I stared down at Tally, who sat on the floor with a black eye, a busted lip, and a cut to her head. She literally looked like she went ten rounds with Mike Tyson and came out on the very bottom end of the pole."Oh, my god." I ran to her, quickly unlocking my door and helping her to her feet. As soon as the door opened, I helped her inside and realized by the look of her, she was far more pregnant than she initially had thought she was."Tally, we have to call the hospital. You need an ambulance."Shaking her head, though, she took a seat on the sofa. "No, I can't go to the hospital. I'll be okay. This isn't the first time I've gone through this, and he never hurts the baby, so it's just me, my face."Stepping back, I stared at her in complete shock, not understanding how she had found me and how she had even gotten up here, considering you needed a key card to get in. "How did you find me?"Staring at me, her mouth opened and closed before a heavy sigh l
JamesAnger coursed through my veins as I stared at Tally sitting on Becca's living room sofa. I hadn't expected to see her in Becca's living room, but fate had other plans. Instead of me coming here to search for her—she found her way towards me."Thank you for not going out there," Tally whispered, staring at her feet.I wanted to wring her neck and tell her how stupid she was being. Before I could, the front door opened, and Becca walked into the apartment slowly, her eyes not meeting mine.Casting her eyes towards the floor, she passed by me, making her way towards the stairs. Guilt rolled through me at how I had spoken to her. I realized now I was wrong for speaking to her as I did. She wasn't the reason I was angry, but she was the only outlet I had when I unraveled.That was no excuse. I had been a complete asshole. "Becca—" I said, grabbing her arm gently, stopping her in her tracks. I didn't get a chance to continue as she held up her hand, stopping me from con
Becca.After everything that had happened with James, I let myself succumb to the lust that took over on very often occasions. I loved him, but loving him wasn't good for me. At least, I wasn't sure if it was. I wanted him to stay, but I was so far past having the effort in this anymore.I just wanted to sleep. Curl up in my bed, and hide away from the world.There was no point in exhausting myself mentally, emotionally, and physically by fighting for a relationship that just could not work. At least, not right now. Perhaps when everything was said and done with my schoolwork and Tally had the baby, and James had figured out whatever else he had going on… then he could work towards something more.Maybe anyway… who knew what the future would hold?Laying In bed naked, I stared at the ceiling, trying to move around all the vivid thoughts I had. James and I had once again done what we usually did, and with as many questions as I had, I wanted to know what the truth was. I ne
BeccaTwo weeks went by before I was actually able to find myself in some kind of contentment. The moment I broke it off with James, I went upstairs and cried my eyes out, unable to focus on anything, and even when Monday came around, and my classes fell back into session, I just couldn't get myself together.Everything, instead, went by in a blur. I felt trapped within my mind, trying to pay attention but doing so numbly because I had ended things with the man I loved. I couldn't deal with the complications. I couldn't keep dealing with the unassured way my life was going, the chaos constantly consuming me.That was no way for any woman or man to live.And though he wanted to keep a hold of me, I couldn't do that.Looking at my phone, I stared at my missed calls from the day. Every day he called me, he would call twice or three times, trying to get me to pick up. Sending me text messages telling me not to do this, and I at first replied. But now?Every time my phone ran
BeccaThe weekend came quicker than I imagined and before I knew it, I was in my car driving to New York City. Even though Neal had absolutely refused for me to do so. He said he would have me flown down here, but I enjoyed driving. It gave me time to clear my mind and relax in the scenery.That is, of course, until I actually got into New York City and then reminded myself why I did not enjoy living in a city, nor driving in one. It was nothing but utter chaos.The bumper to bumper traffic was crazy, and nobody knew how to drive. Nobody used turn signals. People just walked right out in front of you in the middle of the road like they owned the damn place. I don't know how many times I had to slam on my brakes because I almost hit somebody.But as I pulled into the parking garage of Neal's building and found the lovely parking space he had reserved for me, I couldn't be happier.This was going to be an absolutely amazing vacation.Regardless of how the past few month
JamesIt had been two weeks since I had spoken to Becca. I still couldn't believe the moment I was leaving, she found comfort being able to just call it off with me.Maybe I should have tried to force her to stay with me or something. I didn't know what the f*ck I was doing or thinking. At the end of the day, I'd just let her go. I let her say goodbye to me. Even though it killed me, it was happening. I had done so much for her, and she didn't seem to want to make it work. She just wanted a way out, and as hurt as I was—I was angry.No matter how many times I'd called, no matter how many times I texted her—nothing.Only twice did she respond, and those were vaguely a conversation. Her response was just like the other times we'd aruged. She told me I had priorities I needed to situate, and she wasn't one of them. That perhaps in the future, things would change.I was angry, on edge, unable to focus on a goddamn thing because she clouded every single moment of my waking m
Becca.I didn't need to push much longer until the baby was born. I let out a sigh of relief as a lot of pressure was released as the doctor announced the head was out. I was almost done pushing. Out came the shoulders, and then the doctor was able to pull the baby out. She lifted the baby up and smiled, studying the baby for a moment. "It's a boy!" she said, causing the room to erupt into cheers. I gave a very quiet cheer of my own, my body completely exhausted. I closed my eyes, tears still spilling down my cheeks. I was still worried about how healthy he was, though, since he had come so early. "The baby is healthy, even if a bit underweight. He'll get meat on his bones in no time," the doctor assured me, reaching over to hand the baby to me. Putting a few clips into place, the doctor handed James a pair of scissors, and he cut the umbilical cord. Then, she began the process of helping me pass the afterbirth while the nurses prepared to clean our son up while
Becca.Several months had passed since our honeymoon, and things had been going wonderfully. The baby was developing very healthily, and they were going to be on the way soon. I was tired as I sat on the couch, reading up on some news. The progress with Guatemala went very well. I had made contact with locals who were going to make sure everything ran smoothly and children would be getting what they needed. The thought made me smile. Children deserved wonderful lives. The kids were just put to bed about an hour ago. 8:00 PM was too early for me to go to bed quite yet, but I was feeling tired. Still, I needed a snack, as my cravings were intensifying lately by quite a bit. I walked up to the fridge and rummaged through it, pulling out a jar of pickles and giving a satisfied sigh. I grabbed a plate, taking out several to munch on while I watched television. Maybe this would help me wake up a little bit. I wanted to wait until James got home. He was busy worki
Allegra."I have made a list of reputable centers that we can look into," I said to Layla, leaning on her as we stared at a laptop on the table. At the moment, we were looking into adopting, though not right this instant. We wanted to do a lot of research first. Not to mention, Layla wanted to get another cat so Onyx had a playmate, and they'd need to adapt to our apartment first. The idea of adoption was a prospect both of us adored. Giving a child a loving home would be a wonderful thing. Layla pointed to the screen, saying softly, "I've heard about that one. Good things, thankfully. I think we should be open-minded about teens." She frowned sadly, closing her eyes. "They are often overlooked.""I agree," I said. "They may be a large responsibility, as teenagers can be rowdy, but I'm confident we can handle it. Can't be worse than being captured by the Russian mob," I said with a chuckle. Layla winced but gave a half-smile. "You still think about that, huh
Becca."This place is beautiful," I said, looking around the fancy restaurant in Florence and letting out a happy sigh. Vines practically dripped from the ceiling, making it feel as though we were in a romantic movie. My life was similar enough to one, at this point! Mariano and Neal sat together across the table from James and I, all smiles and warm energy as well. They sipped wine and nodded, agreeing with my observation about the atmosphere. I took a sip of water myself, always mindful of the baby."This is the place where we met!" Mariano exclaimed with excitement. "When I first laid my eyes on Neal, I knew a prince had entered the establishment. A handsome one that made me swoon in my seat," he said. He winked at Neal, and the other man blushed. I giggled, gushing, "You two are so cute! I'm so happy for you. It really does look like you connected, which is wonderful. Just like a storybook!" Mariano nodded, his grin only widening at the idea. This place had a
James. "Look at how wonderful and huge they are, James!" Becca exclaimed, causing me to smile. It was the day after our first engagement on the beach, and I was happy to relax. At the moment, we were looking at some giant tortoises with a deep sense of awe.She was right; they were the size of side tables. A guide handed Becca some lettuce, which she held out to the tortoise. She squealed with delight as the animal took a leaf from her and began munching, causing my smile to widen even further. I was so happy to be able to relax. Security had reported nothing odd happening, and they seemed to be having a ball as well. I was relieved, though I shouldn't have expected anything bad to happen. Not like the Cartwrights tracked our every move. At least, I hoped not. I shook that thought out of my mind as Becca continued to give a ton of attention to the tortoises. One of the security men walked over with a camera in his hand, beaming at us. "Let's get some pictures of
Becca.This was it. The perfect honeymoon, the one where James and I would have the time of our lives. I was thrilled, my heart singing even as I looked out the window of the airplane we were taking. With the money I had, we were able to charter a private jet. Even after all these months, I'd never completely gotten used to always being able to afford the best of everything. The staff was very kind, including the flight attendants who catered to our every need. Our money came with a lot of advantages. I tried not to think about that too much, though. It made me feel guilty.Rather, when my worries became too heavy, I reminded myself of the charity that I was starting off. I realized I couldn't physically go to Guatemala, but with my wealth, I reached out to locals for the best ways to run a charity for kids there. The representative I spoke with had been wonderfully helpful, and it made me beyond happy that I could still help while not being there. I had decided I
James."This is going to be such a wonderful trip, James!" Becca exclaimed, wrapping her arms around me. I smiled, returning the hug and holding her close. When she pulled away, I gave her a tender kiss.At the moment, we were sitting in the living room of the compound with a laptop open on the table showing all the activities we could do in Seychelles. The pictures of beautiful, pristine beaches with shining sand and deep blue water got me excited, too."I think we should see the tortoises and dolphins," Becca said, giving a smile. "The kids are going to love those pictures. Someday, we need to take them with us, to a kid-friendly area." No doubt she would be paying attention to that during our honeymoon. "That is an excellent idea, my love," I said to her, giving her another squeeze. We exchanged another kiss as she continued to scroll through the pictures and destinations. Thankfully, the trip was taken care of flight-wise and hotel-wise. Having money was
Neal.A few weeks had passed since I met Mariano, and the strong sense of attraction I had to both his looks and personality had not faded. In fact, we were hitting it off even harder now, and I couldn't be happier. Thankfully, I was brave enough to call Becca and say I wanted to visit as a friend. I meant it this time. There was no ulterior motive, not that there had been one, to begin with. She may have been stuck in my head a little, but that wasn't an issue anymore. After some hesitation, she agreed to see me. Likely because I wanted to introduce her to Mariano, which put her at ease for me not actually being after her anymore. I accepted that she was with James. Mariano and I were sharing lunch before heading out. I gazed into his eyes, my own full of adoration for the man. "We're really hitting it off, aren't we?" I chuckled, breaking the silence that had formed between us as we ate sandwiches. Mariano winked, saying, "I think we are, yes. I am thrill
James.Still feeling beyond happy about the news of the baby still being healthy, I walked over to the fridge to get myself a quick snack before meeting with Giovani. Becca was dripping with joy, which made me relieved, to say the least. She had no idea what was going on in the background, and I didn't want her to, either. She shouldn't suffer the stress of anything anymore. My wife was looking forward to a wonderful life with our expanding family, and I wouldn't let worry settle in her mind. At least, despite the stress on my end, we were going to have our honeymoon soon. The kids were happy, and that's all I could ask for. Speaking of which, I stopped into the nursery for a visit before heading off to discuss things with my cousin. Alessandro was playing around with a few cars and stuffed animals. Dahlia sat in front of him, doing the same, making happy cooing noises threaded in with a few words. When they saw me, they let out squeals of happiness and hobbled o