LOGINShare
1. Phoebe (Continued)
Last Updated:
2024-10-29 19:42:56Naomi jumps out, grinning at me, and I can’t help running even harder towards her. Does she even know how badass she makes black look? It’s just sportswear, but the way she carries it, how do you ever have that much self-belief?
“Naomi! I didn't think you'd come back! I’m dodging Sawyer, Mama is always sending him to fetch me back to Cragstone.” “Why are you always getting away? Is there something wrong?” she asks, and I don’t even know where to begin. It's shameful not to get along with your wolf. To admit you're lonely and the only person you talk to regularly is hired to bother finding you. I need her to stay around long enough. Maybe I could even ask her for advice about Huli. her wolf might be a handful, too, for all I know. I open my mouth to try and string something together except for my other sister. “Hey! What are you doing this far out!” Leona interrupts, shouting out of the truck window. She can piss off, always treating me like a baby. Naomi is the one staring at me with concern in her eyes. So I flip her off, hand raised high, smirking like a child as Leona rolled her eyes. Then I felt pain. Sharp, searing agony. Only after smashing into the ground did i feel the heat and the brightness. I put a hand to my face only to feel the heat of my own blood gushing from my cheekbone. Where Leona and the truck once stood there existed only flames. Naomi was in a ball, moving, screaming, and wailing. I tried to edge myself towards her only to realise my leg and shoulder were cut up, blood seeping into my white gown. “LEONA NO!” my heartbroken sister screamed, her face completely savage with pain, staring straight at the fireball. For a few seconds, I held her, completely dumbstruck as burning paper flew about, carried by the wind. What the hell were they fetching back? /Get help!/ Huli shouted at me, snapping me out of my shock. Sawyer. Sawyer linked me a few minutes ago. /Sawyer, are you there?/ /Phoebe? Phoebe there’s been an explosion, I can see the smoke. You’ve got to come back now-/ /That's where I am. I’m hurt, so is Naomi-/ /I’m on my way, don’t move./ I somehow manage to tell Naomi I’ve linked Sawyer and hold her as she screams the darkest, most desperate roar I’ve ever heard in my life. /Are you in danger? Talk to me for fucks sake!/ Sawyer snaps, his voice as harsh as the heat that slams into Naomi and I in waves. The smell of charred flesh hits my nose and I fight back the urge to vomit. I'm bleeding. Naomi is bleeding. My big sister. A sister I had nothing nice to say about has gone. /We could have saved her. If we still had our gift/ Huli remarks and it is my wolf’s extra layer of guilt that sees me retching into the tall grass, the sound of vehicles rumbling closer over the roar of the flames.
Related chapters
Resisting the Beta 2. Sawyer
Climbing on top of the truck cabin, I got a view of a thick rising column of smoke over a mile away. /Anyone close?/ I link out to my fellow Beta Warriors. /Half an hour south of Cragstone?/ Beta Riley answers separately /Is it that black smoke in the distance?/ /We should check it out. Meet you there?/ Then Phoebe’s voice bounced into my head. Deceptively sweet and gentle for someone who hurled a rock at me the last time I tried to get her to come home. /Sawyer, are you there?/ Goddess help me. Of course she’s finally found herself in some real trouble. No doubt the cause of that fire, I bet. I didn’t panic until the link went quiet. The trembling fear in her voice hit me hard. Almost like the air had been sucked out of my lungs. No mocking. Just a plea. For me. That’s a first. She’s called me every curse word under the sun over the past few months. Mostly amusing, sometimes seriously fucking annoying. More annoying is the blue-eyed, fussing Penelope. Like a vul
Resisting the Beta 2. Sawyer (Continued)
“I don’t need babysitting Sawyer,” Phoebe complains. Of course. As always. “It’s not babysitting. It’s guarding. It’s also not an option. Now go inside,” I bark. She slams the door in my face, muttering expletives before gentle, sobbing noises eke out from under the wooden door. Half an hour later, Eleanor reopens it and whispers, “Thank you Sawyer. You’re a good friend to us.” “Just following orders,” I lie again. It’s just responsibility to the pack. I’d do the same for anyone else. We’re not even friends. I’m fairly certain I’m her nemesis. Well in a few weeks she’ll be chasing full moon dances like the rest of them. Probably mated to someone easily bossed around like Dash or Theo. Phoebe Kharkov coming of age. Bizarre, considering she sometimes has the temperament of a five year old. I imagine when she isn’t scowling, cursing or running away, she could be considered a beauty. She's clever too when doesn’t shrink in on herself or resort to childish insults. Comi
Resisting the Beta 3. Phoebe
The orange dress Mama picked out was only one of the reasons I had to get out of the house. The sobbing takes me straight back to losing my father. I head over to Finn’s cottage for the first time in my life and find Naomi slumped on the floor bawling, the same position as I left my Mama. We don’t talk about that. We don’t talk about Finn either. Finn was exasperated when we crossed paths. Maybe that’s why he gave me the crap advice to suggest Rami is trying to fight like Naomi. He isn’t. Rami is just a whirling lump of chubby fists. So I received yet another withering look from Naomi. It’s like Leona is still here. Identical ire and exasperation. Nothing I want to say comes up during my brief time at the cottage. Like, what were all the books? Why were they coming back so soon? What were they rowing about before Naomi jumped out? Naomi refuses to wear the dress. I hate my orange, itchy monstrosity, so why did I agree? /Because you’re the baby Kharkov/ Huli sneers. Wh
Resisting the Beta 4. Sawyer
By the time Easton and I got back from the bombsite, I was fit for nothing more than crashing into the bunkhouse. “Looks like we missed a party, wasn’t it meant to be a pyre?” Easton grimaced, stepping over abandoned bottles of whisky and tequila outside Riley’s room. He’s got some newbies he’s meant to be mentoring. Doesn’t seem like much of that is going on. I’ll raise it to Cillian, making a mental note for the morning. I glare at Rileys closed door. “Bet it was that fucking card game again. Want some food?” gesturing to the two wrapped plates waiting on the counter. “Yes please, I’m starved. Did you know stress, fear makes you hungrier? You send your body into fight or flight it fucks with your blood sugar.” I don’t know what he’s trying to say. He’s chunky because he’s greedy. Not because he’s battling untold levels of mortal danger on a daily basis. He notices my amusement and laughs. “You know what I mean. I bet you ate less during the war. Anyways, you know I much
Resisting the Beta 5. Phoebe
Whoever said shifters don’t get hangovers are dirty, lying scumbags. They are painfully real. The instant dawn breaks, I flop out of bed, grab a towel, stick a dark blue, baggy dress over some exercise wear and vanish out of our house. Still, I was spied on the way by Dash and Kian. “Fun times Kharkov!” they called out, miming drinking actions. But they were smiling, a smattering of brown freckles dotting Dash’s nose and cheeks. Kian blushing as normal. Normally, they would pretend they hadn’t seen me and glanced the other way. I mimed a gun to the head, rolling my eyes and getting another laugh. /Well done!/ Huli chimed. “Nah, think of us, Phoebe. Shaw was sick on our feet on the run home!” “No way!” I joke. The happiness at having someone new to talk to other than Huli almost made me forget Riley. I head to the riverbank. The tyre swing I have spent endless hours mulling things over at. However, today, I have a different purpose. Untying my plaited hair, wondering wha
Resisting the Beta 6. Phoebe
Naomi’s pep talk was the kick I needed. Probably nothing noticeable, but I can feel it. Even Naomi losing her cool and having a swipe at Riley didn’t derail me. It felt good hurling a fruit basket at her, though. Finally, I have plans. One I can soon talk about and the one I must take to the grave. I found Jane straight after leaving my Naomi’s, loitering skittishly around the Beta Warrior’s bunkhouse. “Hey, can we talk?” Her blonde ringlets jumped into the air, her entire body jerking in surprise. “Phoebe! Of course, sorry, I was just checking…no matter!” a forced smile stretching across her face. “Can we talk in private?” I add, aware that the longer we stand here, the more chance there was of Riley appearing. Looking down at my red-stained hands, I made a show of innocence, raising them in the air, “Hair dye, I swear!” Until she chuckled, and we made our way together. “If you want, let’s head out of town,” Jane offered calmly as together, arm in arm we strolled. Cr
Resisting the Beta 7. Sawyer
It’s been a long six weeks. White Forest was of course a fucking bust. Nikolai was in no mood for house guests. Dressed in black with dark, sweeping locks to his shoulders. I received one reluctant night's bed and board before he suggested I try the inns of Silver City. His attempt at politely telling me to go away. “Nikolai,” Luna Genevieve whispers, her hand entwined in his. Her delicate peach gown floating to the ground in waves of soft tulle, disguising the power she wields. “Stay for dinner please?” “The Alpha is correct. I should go-” “Please. Do stay for dinner.” Nikolai stated, with all the temptation of a live embalming, a ruby glint in his dark eyes. Genevieve rolled her eyes, clearly mindlinking a reprimand. “I should go. But thank you.” They should be a riotous storm. A marriage of unhappiness. But somehow, they shine together. I think that is why he doesn’t want me lingering. He has found his perfection. She adores him exactly as he is. Readying my bike, I
Resisting the Beta 8. Sawyer
Stopping halfway back on the bike ride back to Rising Star I wrench my hands into my bright white locks. I have to get my shit together. Why can’t she see how foolish she’s being! “FUCKING HELL!” cursing the sky above. I’ve not put a foot wrong since joining the Beta Warriors, leaving my shitty non-life in the south behind. Now I’m holding secrets. I bet she hasn’t considered the wrong person finding her notes. Or if she could control herself in the heat of an argument from striking someone down. The chaos she could awaken. I don’t mind admitting that anyone else, even men I’ve fought alongside, would have been arrested instantly. We have those two idiots locked up in Rising Star with their legs broken for lesser crimes. How could she think she would get away with this? Nash, my so-called wolf, is silent. Shifters are meant to be superior because we have these guardian angel advisors. Well I’m flying blind. Again. I should have talked it over with her. Suggested some groun
Latest chapter
Resisting the Beta Epilogue Four
Naomi (Continued) “I meant to ask you something,” Finn murmurs sleepily as we watch yet another shooting star go by. “Did it bother you that we never had a ceremony?” “No…no it just never felt the right time, then we had been together so long it almost didn’t matter?” “It’s a shame. Your sisters had all promised to walk together.” “We did it for Matilda. If things had gone differently, we would have walked for Eleanor and Rhett, but it all broke apart. I'm just glad we all found happiness, even if it wasn't in the same town square.” “Did Sia give you an address for Eleanor?” “Yes but I left it alone in the end. She knows where we are. She’s made a choice a long time ago,” I whisper sadly, clutching my King’s hand tightly. I know every wrinkle and line in his muscular frame. I could make his replica out of clay in every pose. The feel of his body is a memory I constantly revisit. “I found my memory box the other day when we were packing,” I add. “I didn’t know you had o
Resisting the Beta Epilogue Three
Naomi It’s been fifty years since we took over as Alpha and Luna this full moon. Fifty years. Time has the cruellest ability to just vanish from underneath your feet. I swear I was a feisty, opinionated, quad-bike obsessed woman in her twenties just the other day. Now, creeping upon me like a riptide, I'm a content, slow-moving little fossil. I’m his girl, his Queen. He is my King. Now and forever. The quad-bike-revving beast of a man who only ever cares for us. I love the fact I’m still his girl even as time eats away at our vitality. My hair is no longer fiery red. I’ve conceded to grey. He insists it only makes my brown eyes all the prettier. I’d blush, except I love every word he says. I still find any opportunity to stand above him and bring my face to his, marvelling at the lack of wrinkles on his relaxed, still-boyish features. We’re currently down on the very south of the Shadowlands coast, in Finn’s old family home, left to him by his parents. I wonder if all o
Resisting the Beta Epilogue Two
*** SEVEN MONTHS LATER*** PHOEBE It is strange when the life you thought you always wanted lands in your lap. Except they don’t feed your soul. I lecture students on human and shifter history. An expert in my bitterly-learned field. The contrasting versions of events. The dangers of automatically believing the only side of the story you have access to. The fact history is always told from the side of the winner. I stride the corridors, my wedding band and bumblebee pendant permanently part of me. But it’s not enough. Jane and Wren are so incredibly kind. The hours I've spent talking through Huli and those momths with them have been cathartic. Even so, they know Rising Star isn’t what I want. Not without Sawyer. Of course, it would have been ungrateful to protest at Alpha Finn’s decision. Two people voted for me to die. Including my own sister. Alpha Finn saved me whilst yanking Sawyer away. It’s been seven months, yet every night, I lie awake. I think of the same mom
Resisting the Beta Epilogue One
*** 7 MONTHS LATER *** ALPHA FINN “Alpha!” That fake-serious, minx of a voice forces me to pause. Not ideal when halfway across the Jackson’s roof, retrieving Rami’s misplaced arrow. Again. Considering he is meant to be an archery prodigy, he seems to fire it up into that thatched cottage’s eaves with annoying regularity. “This is your fault, Luna!” I shout back, fully aware of her laughing from the packhouse. When she sends a bolt of seriously dirty thoughts across our bond, I almost put my foot into the chimney. Thankfully, Diane is with Beta Tucker again, straightening out his boredom-driven drinking via pure seduction. "IT WAS ME!” Rami adds with glee. Naomi innocently claims the practice targets Rami uses simply must face the Jackson’s cottage. I don’t argue. Not when my girl slinks around in dark bodysuits that leave my hands twitching to wrap around her waist. I have no arguments, only desires. Any argument she has formulating just vanishes away at the soun
Resisting the Beta 45. Phoebe
My mouth drops open, but there is nothing to say. Nikolai doesn’t suffer the same issue. “Now just fuck off a minute-” but Cillian doesn’t even flinch. Zeke and Freya step forward, their eyes wide with surprise. "You haven't discussed this with us?" “Look, my father was never born an Alpha. He rose. He proved himself. Calm in danger, braver than any of his peers. Any Shadowlands Alpha should follow the same route. I haven't. I've made it this far by the skin of my teeth. So I want you all to endorse and support and give your backing to Finn. Alpha Finn Penkov and his Luna, Naomi Kharkov of the Shadowlands.” The only person to make a sound is Rami, who starts clapping wildly and shouting “KING FINN! King Finn and Prince Rami! Haha, I'm in charge!!” He doesn’t seem to realise everyone else is in complete shock. He’s just thrilled his favourite person in the world is getting a promotion. And by default, in his eyes anyway, himself. “Do you accept?” Cillian says, not really givin
Resisting the Beta 44. Phoebe
The truck ride certainly gave me time to think. For one, I am eternally grateful Huli was no longer with me. I don’t miss having a wolf. The agony she would have been putting me through had she still held residence in my consciousness made me instinctively reach for my wrist. The only sign of that former life, one that could be years ago instead of just a few months, is a faint, grey scar on my wrist. It used to be so red and angry. Now, it has settled down to almost nothing. Genevieve picked up on it whilst she came to say goodbye. “I know you’re scared.” “I am. But only because it’s what I deserve.” “Well, if it helps, Nikolai and I are attending this meeting too. Cillian has asked for Rising Star as well.” "Oh." That absolutely does not help in any way. It only means Matilda will have even less influence. It makes me think Cillian is preparing to make an example of me. Genevieve has been kind enough to lend me a cornflower blue and white gown. Its swirling blue remi
Resisting the Beta 43. Sawyer
Nikolai explained, in a much more brutal and dickish way than was necessary, that we only got one night's stay at White Forest Castle. After all, he has sworn to help Alpha Cillian and Zeke, the pair of them bound in a trio of voting and veto. I don't care. We have each other right now. Every day seems to be swinging us to the extremes, and now we are just waiting for the biggest and hopefully final one to go our way. “I think we need to switch our brains off for a while,” Phoebe sighed, our brown dust-covered bodies flopping onto the bed of our small little room. “I can’t keep thinking about next week. It will drive me insane.” “Cillian could just exile us. Or maybe be so taken up in making Heath pay that we are nothing to him. Matilda will have an influence.” “I killed my mother and put him, Naomi and Finn into a trance. I stole a child…” “Not you. Your fucking wolf. You were just the vessel,” I sigh, too weary to go round the grisly roulette wheel. Phoebe rolls herself
Resisting the Beta 42. Phoebe
Clutching his silver goblet, our nameless, very-well rested hostage was almost chirpy, insisting he had a brother in law in the next town he could call on for a ride. But Sawyer shook his head when the time came to abandon him in the dark. “No…no it’s not right to take this. Can you drop us at the border? Keep the truck.” “From here, your nearest pack is Rising Star?” “That works just fine,” Sawyer replied. Walking through the night, keeping away from the towns and villages, Sawyer found us fresh water to drink, before killing and cooking a fish over a small fire. I’m probably endlessly naive, but to me, it was a perfect night. Because finally, there was not a single obstruction to just being with Sawyer. The man who patiently explained how you can catch a fish bare-handed. Explaining why he purposely ignored one section of the river, walking another mile upstream. I said nothing when he stripped to his underwear to stand in the shallows. I whooped and laughed instead when
Resisting the Beta 41. Sawyer
I felt Phoebe’s fear rise at the sight of Cillian. I saw a chance. Our opportunity to finally put things right. I just need him to listen to me instead of immediately heading to decapitation. His wolf's eyes were entirely golden, burning anger at the forefront of his intent. Cillian didn't even attempt diplomacy. No Shadowland envoys to King Heath, not even a personal visit to Bridgend to ask if there was truth in any rumours. He’s ended up straight here, shifted into wolf form, and shredded his way through at least twenty human men. What if this isn't the first prison he's tried? What will be the fallout from the Alpha's desperation? I couldn’t get Matilda’s cell unlocked in time. The heavy collection of black and silver keys was impossible to gauge. With the gag still in her mouth, Matilda wasn’t coming to our aid anytime soon. Plus, I know how it feels to be obliterated by wolfsbane. Sluggish, dopey. She might not even believe this is even real if they’ve really pum
