The evening breeze blew through the curtains of the window and I looked at the chandelier on the top. The moonlight crept in all the corners of the room and I felt so alone this evening. I don’t want to get out of this bed, nor leave this room but I have to. As a Luna and the wife of Alpha Alder of the Shadow Pack, I need to fulfill my duties that were given to me.
I married Alder three years back; this marriage and relationship is nothing but a prison for me. I feel like a prisoner, I can’t do or express anything that’s on my mind.
I can’t blame Alder; he never wanted me and I entered his life as an unwelcoming guest. It will always be that way. Even though we are mates, our marriage didn’t happen out of love, it occurred because of the compulsion, at least for him. I married him believing he got some interest in me, and thought we were going to be like the rest of the wolves who got married but in reality, we aren’t.
Alder is the meaning of perfection, he’s like a dream for every she-wolf. I married him and everyone thought I was lucky, but they don’t know how wrong they are. He and I were together for the past three years, this marriage is nothing but mundane. For namesake he’s with me and keeps me as his wife to shut others questions.
He hasn't marked me and we have never lived as loving mates. He always kept me in a distance that’s hard for me to reach out to him and he won’t let me be by his side either in the pack meetings or in the other social gatherings.
During these past three years, I gave up a lot of things, including my passion to become a fashion designer. But Alder treated me coldly and always ignored my existence. I can understand that I am not the one he wanted in his life, he had someone who he thought was perfect for him. Grace is her name. She was his first love. Maybe she’s the one and only woman who took a place in his mind and soul.
She’s the alpha’s daughter of the blue moon pack. She has gone abroad after our marriage, just like Alder, she’s heartbroken as I took her place. I never intended to do that, if Alder has said that he has someone else in his life, I would have never married him, his silence and my stupidity is the reason why I am here.
The problem is Grace has returned yesterday; she even sent a message to me saying that she was the one Alder really loved. I don’t know how to take that, I just cried thinking my relationship with Alder is going to end soon. If she comes here, Alder will prefer to be with her than with me.
He has no interest in me. That's what I feel whenever he gets close to me. Most of the time, I don’t know what he feels. He has this enigmatic aura which is difficult for me to understand. But his wolf, Benau, is loyal to Lulu. They both were yearning to get mated with each other.
He hates me, I can understand that in all of his actions but whatever it is, I have to act as his wife. It might sound unfair and humiliating. I sometimes feel as if I have no self-esteem but I can’t change the way I am living right now. Everyone around me expects me to live this way and I can’t disappoint the people around me.
Today I will get the answer for everything. If he chose me or her.
I took my phone to ask Alder if he’s coming to have dinner with me. The other pack members have noticed what’s going on between us. They asked me if he was absent and I hated to stand there without an answer. It’s not that I am frustrated over this, I hate the fact that everyone knows what’s going on between us.
When I was about to press the call, I thought of what Alder said to me before. I shouldn’t call him if nothing is serious, especially asking if he can eat with me. I shouldn’t ask him where he is and what he is doing, which is something a friend would do. I am his wife and I am not allowed to do that.
Sometimes I think I am the unluckiest person. If I take a moment and look at my life, I think that’s indeed the truth.
I sighed and as usual, I decided to have dinner alone.
“He’s doing this again,” Lulu, my wolf, snarled in anger. She’s the one greatly affected by all these hardships that have been happening for the past three years. She isn’t happy even though I tell her that everything is going to be fine one day.
She knows the situation better than me, so nothing can convince her. She thinks, even I think the moon goddess has punished us by giving a cruel mate. She wanted us to be happy, instead of living like this.
“Let’s just have dinner and go to sleep. I am tired,” I answered.
“You’re doing this every time, Sirena. This isn’t right,” Lulu complained.
“What do you want me to do?” I asked in frustration.
“Will you listen to me?”
“Of course, I will listen to you,” I said.
“If you get a chance to restart your life in the future, promise me that you will live for yourself, not for anyone else. Don’t think someone will get hurt because of your decision,” Lulu advised.
I couldn't help but smile when I heard that.
“I will, Lulu. I promise you that,” I said, “And thank you for always being there for me,”
“You don’t have to thank me,” she said. She’s the only person who supported me in all the worst times of our life.
“Okay fine,” I said.
I had dinner alone in the big dining hall and went back to my room as I had no interest in going out. I have no one to ask me what I am doing, nor what’s going on in my life.
I laid on the bed after changing into my pajamas and closed my eyes to sleep.
A few minutes passed and I heard footsteps. I know it must be Alder, he will go to his room so I didn’t pay any attention to him.
When the footsteps approached closer to me, I got nervous, and I didn’t open my eyes. All of a sudden, Alder grabbed my hand and yanked me.
I opened my eyes in complete shock.
“What are you doing?” I questioned.
He didn’t answer. His dark brown eyes glow in the moonlight and he’s drunk. Fear crept in my mind and I tried to come out of his grip.
“What do you want? Leave my hand,”
He didn’t answer me and yanked me to stand on my feet. It’s been so long since I got so close to him and my heart raced in excitement.
Even though he acts so rude and mean all the time, I couldn’t hate him. In fact, I love him. Yes, my stupid heart loves him ever since I met him for the first time. It’s not love at first sight; I just liked him and then I slowly started to love him. I didn’t know why this happened to me. He never did anything special to get such a place in my heart. This happened slowly and gradually.
Now, instead of getting scared I am excited to see him close to me.
"Don't say a word,” he placed his hand on my neck and pulled my face close to him. My cheeks instantly blushed and I had a hard time resisting my urge to touch him.
His lips came dangerously close to me and I can’t believe this moment. I thought we were never going to kiss but this moment seemed remarkable. His eyes were on mine, his breath on my skin, his lips were just an inch away from me and his hands were on my hip.
I tried not to look at his eyes, and I couldn’t stand still with all these feelings. My heart raced as soon as his lips touched mine, I let go of my shyness, and held him close to me. The kiss became intense.
I know I am going to regret what I am doing but I don’t have the desire to stop this. I like his touch; his affection and I love him. One thing led to another. Lulu thought Alder is going to mark me as his mate tonight.
I wonder how he suddenly changed? He left Grace for me. Maybe he must have realized how much I love him. I never failed to show how much I care about him whenever the situation comes. He’s intoxicated, Lulu reminded me but I don’t care. I know Alder, he won’t do anything if he doesn’t like it, except our marriage. Tonight is the day I have been waiting for all these years. This could bring the change that I wanted in my life.
Alder pushed me onto the bed and he came on top of me after taking off his shirt. We kissed so passionately. We made love and I thought Alder would mark me in the process but he never did which kind of made me nervous.
“I love you, Alder,” I confessed when he’s hugging me firmly against his hard torso. I thought maybe now he will do that.
“I love you, Grace,” he answered, which has totally destroyed everything I ever felt for him. My face lost all the happiness which I had moments before. At that moment, I got deeply offended and thought I will never be that person he wanted in his life. My heart is broken beyond repair. I should have realized this before sleeping with him. I will forever regret this.
Alder slept after telling that, but I lost my sleep that night. I looked at what's really wrong with me and I decided something which I never thought I would do.
The next day, I got ready and sat on the chair, watching Alder who’s still asleep on my bed. He woke up and gazed at me.
I don’t see him attractive anymore, I just hate him. I don’t know how long this feeling will last but I want to hold on to it for a really long time.
He looked around and realized that he’s in my room.
“Why am I here? What the hell is going on?” he frowned.
“You came here last night and…” I paused.
“And what?” he asked and he must have realized what we have done.
“Don’t tell me that isn’t a dream,”
I chuckled.
“Yes, that isn't a dream,” I say.
“How can you let that happen?”
I feel ashamed to hear that and I don’t know what to say other than looking at him and this situation helplessly. I am a fool and I let this happen.
“You always do this, you get what you want and you don’t have any shame,” Alder said and my snarled to hear such disrespectful words.
I tried not to get angry because that will not resolve anything.
“Always?”
“Yes, you were the one who deceived my father into this marriage and Grace left me because of you,” he accused me of the things that I never did.
“No, you misunderstood,” I say.
“I am not going to believe you,” Alder said.
“No, you must believe me,”
“Never,” he nodded, he got down from the bed and came to me. I didn’t flinch and stared at him, tears in my eyes.
“What I need to do so that you will believe me,”
I feel so humiliated yet I couldn’t stop begging.
He laughed, “You’re so pathetic, Sirena,”
“Yes, I am. In this situation, I want you to believe me more than anything,”
“I feel sorry for you but I am not going to listen to any of your reasons or pleas,” he said and looked away as if I am not at all a person.
“You took away all my happiness, Sirena,” he said.
I glared at him. “Your happiness isn’t mine to take. If you have loved Grace, then you should have married her. You made the wrong choice and now you are blaming me?”
Alder gritted his teeth in frustration.
“I know, this all happened against your wish but you never once loved me? I have been so good to you even when you treated me badly,” I asked.
“You shouldn’t ask this question Sirena, I hate you,” he retorted. That word has hurt me more than anything. Everything seemed pointless after I heard that from him. But still my heart craved not to break this relationship. His ignorance and hate is something I clearly see today. I can no longer convince myself that he will love me after this or I can love him the same way I used to do. It’s extremely painful, I need to accept this in no time.
"How can you say this to me?"
"Because this is how I feel,"
"You…” I looked at him, and what Lulu said came to my mind at that moment.
“Then let’s divorce, I don’t want this anymore,”
Sirena’s POV “Then let’s divorce, I don’t want this anymore,” I said to Alder. He didn’t expect such a reply from me and I could see how surprised he was. Why did he never anticipate such a moment, don’t he know if love isn’t there, no relationship can survive. How can he think that I will be with him even after all this? He's so selfish that I can understand. It hurts to think that he’s going to be happy by this decision but I am heartbroken. I know what I have decided isn’t something simple, I can’t regret this later on because that would hurt me more than anything. Instead of living with my mate who didn’t love me, it’s better to leave, I think. Nothing is worse if you love someone so deeply and you’re not loved back in the same way, at least treated in the proper way. Right now, holding onto him is so hard and I wanted to run away from this suffering. Lulu was right and it’s time to change my life. “A-are you sure?” Alder asked.“Yes, I am sure,” I don’t know why, I felt like t
Sirena’s POV“Your father said you might refuse to come back and it’s okay,”“Really?” I asked. “Yes, but you have to accept being the general manager of our pack’s business,” Delus said. Now I see that my father won’t leave me that easily. He has plans for me and I am not going to fulfill any of that.The Red moon pack owns the Imperial group and it’s one of the richest and powerful packs. My father has clearly made things easy for me, he must have known that one day I would be in this situation. I felt bad to accept such an offer.“Not only that, your father wanted your complete perseverance and bring the expected profit,” he said.“What?”“If you don’t accept for this then he said his army will attack the Shadow pack,”“What? Are you joking?”“No, not at all. Your father waited patiently for three years for you. If you weren’t a part of the Shadow pack he would have attacked it long before,”“Why?”“Because he doesn’t like Alder. He has broken your heart and often ruin the peace a
Sirena’s POV “What the hell are you doing?” Alder hurriedly took Grace in his arms. Seeing that made me furious. I knew without his invite she won’t be here and they are back together. Not even a day has passed since we got divorced. I can’t believe how desperate Alder is. He’s been waiting for the perfect time for all these days. He must know that she’s back and they must have seen each other in private yesterday. Now she’s back, that’s why he easily agreed for the divorce, he doesn’t want me anymore. I feel disgusted by all of this. He said I am shameless but the truth is, he’s shameless in all levels. I can’t believe how I lived with him for the past three years. He’s not the man I wanted in my life. I hate him so much and I saw the same revulsion in his eyes. “He again misunderstood us,” Lulu said seeing the look on Alder’s face. “I don’t care, Lulu. It’s not the first time he misunderstood us. He can touch anyone, love anyone and do anything he wants. I am no longer going to m
Alder’s POVI am stunned to hear everything that Sirena said, still I am confused what to believe. I looked at Grace. Her eyes didn’t reflect the honesty that Sirena’s eyes did. I never thought Grace would lie to me. “You have once again failed to see the truth,” Benau mocked me. I felt guilty and wanted to chase after Sirena to apologize for what I have said this morning.As I stepped to leave, Grace stopped me and held my hand. “Don’t go after her,” she said. Now I see what’s Grace’s actual feelings are. As a friendly gesture I met her yesterday as she’s been away for the past three years. But Grace’s intention is appalling. “Why I shouldn’t go after Sirena?” I ask. She blinked and I can see that she’s embarrassed. “Looks like what Sirena said was true,” Grace stared at me, she couldn’t say anything for quite some time.She couldn’t hide the truth anymore and I demanded the truth from her.“I am sorry for what I did,” she said. “So, you drugged me last night,” he shouted in an
Sirena’s POVI frowned as I made my way out of the Shadow pack. I regret coming here and I couldn’t get my things.“It’s better that you didn’t take anything from there,” Lulu said, “You will be reminded of the past,”I chuckled, “I will remember all the days I have spent here. It’s not something that I can easily forget or take it out of my memories,” I said to her.As I am walking aimlessly on the streets, a car stopped in front of me again. I thought it must be someone from the shadow pack as I haven’t crossed the border yet. But it’s someone else, and I have never seen this type of car in the shadow pack. There’s I realized it must be my father’s men.“Ms. Sirena, your father wants me to take you to the pack’s hotel. Please get in the car,” the driver said.I just got in without any second thoughts. I have nowhere else to go and I want to get out of here.The car moved through the busy roads, I got lost in my thoughts and I didn’t cry after such a heartbreak. I thought I am a se
Sirena’s POVThe next morning, I woke up when the sun rays dangled over my eyelids. I squinted and then slowly looked at the window. The mountains and the forest looked vivacious. I wish to run aimlessly in the damp mud and sleep on the prickling grass. I smiled and thought this feels heavenly. I slept well last night as there’s no stressful thoughts kept me awake or the feeling that I am unloved wasn’t there. Even though Alder is in my mind, I don’t feel the same way I used to be.I feel new, I feel fresh and I feel free.I walked into the bathroom, took off my clothes and had a nice relaxing bath. It feels heavenly as I stayed in the hot water.I got ready in the clothes that were in the wardrobe, I am surprised that how perfectly it fits me. Raven must know everything. As I was looking at myself in the mirror, someone knocked on the door. I opened it to see my father and step-mother Allison. My father hugged me as soon as he saw me. It's strange that Alder got his name as his middl
Alder’s POV Frank returned to the pack house, I was eagerly waiting to know where’s Sirena and has she spent the night safely. I couldn’t sleep last night thinking about her. I felt remorseful, upset and all sorts of guilty feeling. She needs a place and I let her be alone. Though we are divorced, I promised to protect her and I’ll do it no matter what happens between us. “What happened? Where is she?” I questioned as soon as he came inside. “I couldn’t find here anywhere,” “What?” I frowned. “Have you asked Louisiana?”“Yes, I did. She doesn’t know,” “Someone must have seen her, ask them,” “Yes, you’re right. She left in an unidentified car. I don’t know who took her,” “Are you telling me that she was kidnapped?” “I don’t know,” he calmly answered. “Frank, you don’t have to take this matter seriously,” I said. “Okay,” Frank nodded which instantly frustrated me. He isn’t acting up efficiently in this matter. “Frank, do you realize this situation? My mate is missing, no one
Chapter- 9 Alder’s POV “Mother,” “Alder,” she came and hugged me. I know my mother is the happiest person now. She wanted me to divorce Sirena, she had been telling that whenever we meet. I got so frustrated to hear all those bashings and avoided to meet her. She waited for all these years to hear this news. “I am glad that you’re free now,” she said. “Mother, please,” “Don’t feel bad, Alder. You can marry Grace now. I always tell you that she’s the perfect match for you,” I rolled my eyes, “You’re wrong.,” I said. “What do you mean?”“I am not going to marry Grace or anyone,” “Why?”“Because I can’t forget Sirena,” “Have you lost your mind? You rejected her,” “Yes, I did because she asked for it but I don’t have any desire to divorce her,” She’s so surprised to hear that from me, she thought I hated Sirena. It’s not only her, everyone, including Sirena perceived that was the truth. I am a jerk, I couldn’t be truthful to anyone in my life, even to myself. I liked Sirena bu
The day passed, and Sirena was cleaning and dusting the house. She realized that going back to the pack was a stupid idea. She shouldn’t go back; it would jeopardize all her plans, and take away her peace, or even her life. So, there’s no other choice but to stay in this place for some months. Alder said he’ll leave in one or two days because he doesn’t want to fall under any suspicion. She had to stay here alone.That’s great because she can be free and she can do anything.“What do you want to eat for dinner?”“Anything, I’m exhausted,” she said.“Okay, I’ll cook,”“You’ve all the supplies in the fridge and freezer. If you want anything you can call me, there’s a phone,” he pointed to the shelf.“Sure,” she nodded and lay on the couch.Alder prepared a steak and some veggies. She watched him with a tint of surprise in her eyes. He’d never cooked or acted this nice to her when she was with him. This is really surprising that Alder has a side like this.He’s so considerate. How can a
Xander lost his mind when he got to know that Sirena was missing. He thought she just went to see Priscilla or just roaming around the pack. But when he tried to contact her and she was unreachable, he panicked. He went to Priscilla’s place, broke into the house, and saw no sign of them. He understood that they both were gone.He alerted his pack and they searched for her everywhere. He called Grace, and asked if Alder is in the pack. She told him that he’d left for a business trip, two days earlier.He couldn’t trust that so he asked Grace to check into it. Either she escaped with Priscilla, or ran away alone or Alder must’ve taken her. He doesn’t know what to do. He didn’t let her father know about this but the next day he couldn’t hide it anymore, informed her father that she’d left the pack.He was pissed off, at least in front of him. He asked Xander to leave her alone if he couldn’t find her reasoning that she didn’t deserve a life like this.Xander can’t do that, that would be
That night, she slept on the couch after eating what Alder cooked. It filled her hunger, he’s a great cook. She doesn’t have a deep sleep at all. She thought about so many things staring at the ceiling.Sirena is mentally preparing for the moment when she meets Xander. She has to lash out or else act as all good with a knife behind and just cut his throat when he starts talking lies again. With all these negative feelings, she took off her meaningless wedding ring and stuffed it inside her pocket.She’s not going to forgive him at all. She can even forgive Alder but not Xander. Last night, Alder insisted that their mate bond was cursed and that's the reason he treated them in that way. Maybe that’s true but she couldn’t accept him. The anger in her wants him to be gone and she doesn’t know what she will do if he’s gone.In her life, the men who come into her life always make her uncomfortable and confused. Either they were too sweet for her taste or too unattainable. It doesn’t feel p
Alder sat next to her after putting the things in place.“I want to go back to my pack,” she said.“You can’t,”“It’s not something that you have to decide. I want to go,”“No, that’s too dangerous,”“I don’t understand, why are you so worried? This is my problem and I know what happened. I’ll take care of it,” she said.“How can you take care of it alone? You’re being ridiculous. Xander is way ahead of us and you don’t know what he will do,”Sirena looked at him squinting her eyes. “Why did you bring me here? Who gave you that permission?”“What’s wrong with this?”“You should’ve asked me,”“You wouldn’t have agreed to come with me,”“That’s right. If only you’d asked me in a good way. I would’ve agreed. But you will never do it because you don’t respect me as a wolf. When I was with you, you treated me like your slave just like what you’re doing now,” she said.“So, what? We both have the same intention,” he replied.She stared at him, he’s not understanding the problem. He’s never
Sirena woke up when she felt like she was being shaken and moving. She opened her eyes and saw she was in the car’s back seat. She couldn’t move her limbs for a moment and felt like this was a dream. The last thing she remembers is being in Priscilla’s house. Now she’s here in this car.Gritting her teeth, she got up from the seat and looked at the driver. To her surprise, it was Alder. Priscilla is on Alder’s side, and she helps him abduct her. Sirena gritted because she thought Priscilla was genuine and, on her side, but all this time, she’d worked for Alder. This is too much. How can she do this to me? She questions with anger and resentment.She stared at Alder. He looked excited and happy. Even though they had broken their mate’s bond, she could feel his emotions. She’d admired him a lot in the past, so it’s easy to study his face.“You woke up,” he said sensing her breath closer to him.“What the hell are you doing?” she questions in her hoarse voice.“Can’t you see, I'm taking
After shifting, Lulu made her way to Priscilla's house, and it was the only way Sirena was going to feel alright. The place is quiet as usual. To her surprise, Priscilla wasn’t there at home. She didn’t answer the door. It’s empty. Her garden is untouched and the herbs weren’t watered.She stayed there for some time and she felt there was no sign of her. She decided to leave feeling something wasn’t right. Suddenly she heard a click in the ground, she turned and looked at the house. It came from the inside and she peered inside the window.She can make out a frame in the dark, that’s lying on the ground. She can’t help but think that’s Priscilla and she must be lying there dead or unconscious. That’s a wild assumption yet she doesn’t want to leave without checking on her.She went to the door, and using all her strength, she hit it with her shoulders. She did that several times, but only her shoulders hurt.“Even if you try all day, it won’t open,” Priscilla’s voice came from behind.
As he entered the house, he saw Sirena in the kitchen, cooking dinner for him, unaware that he had been with Grace all this time.“Why are you so late?” she asks.He gave the flowers and kissed her lips. She looked surprised and he thought she loved him too much but in reality, she was surprised to see his perfect ac.“Thanks,” she got that in her hands and kept that aside.“Go and fresh up. I’ll finish this up,” she said and he nods.After he left, Lulu asked, “Did you smell that?”“Smell what?”“He smells like Grace. Her perfume smell coming mildly from her,” Lulu said.Sirena sighs. It makes her heart heavy. She can’t help but have tears to think that she’s too unlucky.“Are you okay?”“Yes, I’m fine,” she nodded and wiped the tears that slid down to her cheeks.“Do you have to do this?”“Yes,”“You don’t have to go through this. Just leave all this behind,”“Where else can I go?”“Anywhere, you got some cash in your hand. You can go far away and start anew,”“They will find me,” s
The truth is always bitter, no matter how much you try to change, it comes out at unexpected times, making it hard to digest. Xander carefully constructed all the lies unaware that it’s falling apart on the other side. He tried not to get caught and did everything carefully but fate had other plans for him.After meeting Grace, Xander made his way to his house. Years back, he was so afraid to go and meet Grace. He doesn’t want anyone to find out about his secret relationship with Grace and he had told everyone that he’d rejected her.On his way, he brought flowers for Sirena so that she didn’t complain that he cared less about her. He believed the flowers would make her forget why he was so late today. He learned this trick from Sirena’s father. He kept his affair a secret from everyone until his wife’s death but Xander had found out in the early stages itself. One time, he followed the Alpha and got to know his affair. He didn’t say that to anyone and he felt sorry for Melody who was
"Alder's mother? Do you know her?""Yes, I have met her a couple of times. Do you that she's related to you,""How?""She's your father's half-sister,""Really?""Yes,""She hates you for no reason because of that. Your family drama is something I can't wrap my head around,""For what she came here for?""Her son and her pack. She's worried about it more than anything,""What did you say to her? What's your prediction?""I told her that her son won’t marry anyone else if he’s not with his mate. He can’t love anyone else and her pack would be better if she didn’t include Grace,”“Did she ask anything about Grace?”“Yes, she did. I told her that she wasn’t trustworthy and her son wouldn’t marry her. Their feelings were all temporary,”“I’ sorry for being too intrusive, but how she reacted when you said that?”“She wasn’t glad and looked like she accepted her son’s fate. I asked her to maintain a healthy relationship with her step-brother or else it will lead to unnecessary problems,”“I