THIRTEEN

I pushed back and faced him, arranging my thighs and legs on the mat as I looked at him.

“Can I ask some more questions about you?”

“Ask away,” he replied casually, but his eyes were curious about my questions. “What else do you want to know?”

“These just occurred to me. So, before Brooke, how many girlfriends have you had?”

A smile slipped over his lips. He was clearly remembering happy memories. “I can’t say they were girlfriends, but I dated a lot during college and later, before I got serious about building up my companies. I had a lot of… casual… encounters. I can’t say anything about serious ones.”

“Ooohhh… I feel jealous. I barely have time to date… or notice guys that I might like. But you’ve never felt any inclinations to turn your arrangement with Brooke around?”

He shook his head. “Don’t get me wrong. She’s a beautiful woman. She’s not bad as a brat. She’s spoiled, but she’s that good kind of spoiled. She can be unselfish and she treats people she’s really close to very well. I didn’t like that she had that affair with her partner now when he was still married… but he’s been divorced since then and they’re still together and I didn’t feel like I was in a position to judge. But I never see Brooke that way. Even if I did, I am not into committed women.”

“So if I happened to be in a relationship right now, I’ll not be qualified?”

He looked at me, and his eyes seemed startled. Like he hadn’t really thought about it.

“Or is that an inappropriate question?” I asked. “You don’t have to answer if it was.”

“You know what… I haven’t even thought about it because it’s been obvious from the very beginning you’re not with anyone. And to be honest… I’m not sure I’d say you'd not be qualified if you happened to be with someone because the moment I saw you… it’s like I already knew you were the one I’d want to do this with me. But… yes…” he admitted reluctantly. “If you happen to be committed to someone, you’ll not be qualified. That’s a complication I don’t need or want.”

“Fair enough. I wouldn't want that, either.” I was watching him closely, and I knew we were both thinking about what happened in my house yesterday, and then in his hotel room later in the morning. That would never have happened, we’d never even get near it if I was with someone else.

“We’ve agreed on honesty in this arrangement.”

“I know,” I said softly.

“We both know we wouldn’t have sex with each other if you are with someone. And I know you are the kind of person who will feel awkward acting out as a girlfriend to someone even if you’re paid to do it when you’re with someone else. You’re not an actress. You’re… specifically what I need for this. It meant the boyfriend would not understand and would get jealous. I’d feel the same if I was him.”

I nodded. “You’re right. I will, too... vice versa.”

“And I’m grateful you’re not with anyone, because I don’t think you’d agree to this if—”

“I would.”

He stared at me. “Explain.”

“My mother’s life is my top priority, Bain. But the first consideration was you. If you hadn’t gained my trust… I don’t think there would be an arrangement.”

“The boyfriend…?”

“I'll break up with him. My mother’s life first. But… I don’t think I can… just…”

“Sex with me," he supplied. "Just public displays of affection.”

So business-like. I felt much better. I nodded.

There was a moment’s silence. “I guess that’s fair,” he said after that.

I was nodding. “You get me?”

“Very well.”

We both took a deep breath, then I returned to leaning next to him again, and his arm was quick to hold me to him as we both reached for our cold pizza. We didn’t need to tell each other that the sex was really mutual consent, because we didn’t want to voice questions that could spread out of that.

“So… what’s your favorite TV show? Books… like you really enjoy reading and not business books, okay?” I asked.

We spent the next hour asking random questions to each other past the box of pizza and exploring the park further until it was past lunch, and then it was mid-afternoon, and I was getting tired. We took a cab to get back to my place.

He didn’t come through the door.

“I need to take care of a few things. Take a rest and I’ll come back for you before dinner.”

I nodded. “Okay. I mean… am I supposed to dress up or go casual?” I asked.

He smiled. “I’ll bring you a dress and some other things. I know your size.”

My eyebrows rose up in surprise. “Oh. Okay then,” I said, even though I worried that whatever he brought wouldn’t look good on me.

But he looked too sure, and he had proven himself right in so many things. It was because he studied everything first before arriving at any decision or option. I have this feeling that in the last two days, he's been studying me, trying to even the most personal or intimate parts of myself, to arrive at a 'model' he knew would be most comfortable for me, and would serve him well, too.

"I trust you with whatever dress you bring. If it fails, I have several dresses upstairs. Not expensive but passable."

“It’ll be fine.” He kissed me on the cheek, then he left.

It was a green dress.

A light-green dress, made of lace, fitted on top with a high neck and delicate-looking cap sleeves, and an A-line skirt with a tulle overskirt. The hem reached down to my knees.

And I fell in love with it before I could even put it on.

Looking at myself in the full-length mirror after I had put on everything and the high-heeled shoes, I had a foreboding about how I was supposed to act and dress when I flew to Texas.

I had never worn anything so elegant and expensive-looking.

He asked me to let my hair down. I obeyed, but I slid in some pins to make sure no strands obscured my face.

I had my make-up on already when he arrived, and I was glad I chose gray eye-shadows for my eyes because it complimented the color of the gown so well.

I looked so beautiful, I couldn’t even believe I was looking at my own reflection.

I knew I was pretty. When you look good, you know it because not only can you see yourself in the mirror, but people comment on it as you grow up. It was like that.

But I never thought I could look this lovely.

I gulped as I thought of the expectations I was going to face being Bain’s ‘girlfriend’ by people who’d known him all his life.

And I knew it wouldn’t just be about how well we treat each other and connect to each other, but also because of my looks.

I was suddenly curious about Brooke because I was sure she was a template and I would be compared to her from the moment I was introduced.

Knowing what I knew now about the woman, I wondered how Bain could believe I could survive the comparison!

Well, I went down the stairs and the first time he saw me in the dress, his eyes glazed over.

That gave me such tremendous relief because I knew there was no way I could convince myself I could do what he needed me to do if he wasn’t himself convinced I could do it.

The look in his eyes right then told me I at least could compete with Brooke’s physical looks in his eyes.

Whatever other people thought was irrelevant.

He’s the one who was supposedly in love with me. His approval was the most important thing in the world.

If I knew he didn't approve, I couldn't act otherwise because people would know.

And I still didn't know how to get around that if Bain changed when we're both in Texas. 

That was why I had several clauses I would need to ask of him tonight, before we parted after dinner.