The house overlooks the sea, its floor-to-ceiling windows making it seem even bigger than it is.
"Where is everyone?" Raisa asks as we follow Vinnie through a hallway just off the main entrance.
"By the pool." He answers before he opens a door that leads us back outside.
This is a pool party??
"I don't have my bathing suit." Raisa whispers to me as we walk down the steps leading to the pool area.
The pool has a perfect view of the sea below and if I didn't have a fear of heights, I would try to climb on top of the rock wall, which is the closest point overlooking the cliffs in this whole estate. Also, the closest you can get to falling off and plunging to your death.
Raisa looks at me, still waiting for me to react to what she just said.
"Me neither." I tell her.
There's a bar by the pool where some people are huddled together, taking shots. I recognize some girls in the pool, as well as some other people chilling on the canopy beds.
"I smell weed." I say to Raisa as soon as we come to a halt by the pool bar. Pia disappeared a few minutes ago and Eddie wandered off to greet some of his friends, so it's just the three of us now, and I feel much more comfortable.
"What do you want to drink?" Vinnie asks me, going behind the bar to the bottles.
"Gin Tonic." Raisa and I both answer at the same time, taking a seat on the highchairs.
Vinnie starts mixing the drinks while Raisa and I take a moment to analyze everyone here. I recognize Marco Giudice, another one of the Italian boys in our year, talking to his little sister Aurora while smoking a joint.
I smile. Of course he is.
Marco Giudice was a year below me in high school and I got along with him since he used to play ice hockey with Adrik. I don't know much about Aurora, except for the fact that she used to come to their games.
Marco catches my eye while talking to his sister, and smiles, nodding in acknowledgement.
"He's kind of cute." Raisa says, leaning over to me so Vinnie wouldn't hear our conversation.
"Who?"
She nods at Marco. "Marco."
It's hard for me to think of him as attractive, because I still picture him as one of my brother's best friends coming over to play video games. But, nevertheless, she's got a point. Athletic guys always have muscles in just the right places, and when it's not too much to be obvious but rather creeps on you silently then it's just-
"Yeah, he is."
Yes, he fucking is. He's wearing a pair of orange swimming trunks that go down to his knees, showing off his tattoo of a pair of scales in balance. Not to mention, he has no shirt on, which is just-
"Are they dating?" Raisa proceeds to ask.
"What? Those two? No, they're siblings. That's his younger sister Aurora."
"Oh."
"She's still in high school, I think. She's like...sixteen."
We both look back at them, and before I can even think about how we might look like stalkers, Vinnie tells us our drinks are ready.
"Let's get into the pool. Makes drinking more fun." he says, gesturing with his glass towards the pool.
"We didn't bring our bathing suits with us." I let him know, crossing my legs on the chair as I lean down to take a sip of my gin.
"It's not the end of the world." Someone interjects, and a guy I've seen around before appears in my line of vision.
I'm not sure whether he wants to make a sexual joke or if he just thinks he's funny, but before I can figure him out he's already looking away. He pats Vinnie on the back before shaking his hand and pulling him into a side-hug.
"Vincenzo, how are things? I haven't seen you in weeks, you son of a bitch!"
His Italian accent is almost nonexistent, but I can tell he's Italian from the way he accentuates his sentences. He looks really familiar, but I can't place him. He looks at Raisa, then at me, before raising his glass to us. "Cheers."
Right. I've seen him at parties around Manhattan before, and I know he's a year above me.
His phone starts ringing so he takes it to his ear, winks at Vinnie, then walks away.
"Who was that?" I ask Raisa, who followed him with her eyes.
She laughs and rolls her eyes. "Like you don't know him."
"He looks familiar."
"That's Matteo." Vinnie smiles, like he knows something I don't. "I'm gonna go see what's up with him. See you girls around."
Raisa and I watch him walk away, and as soon as she makes sure he can't hear us, she leans over to me. "That's Matteo Giudice."
I frown, looking at her shocked. "Giudice as in, related to Marco and Aurora?"
She nods. "He's the oldest, in Vinnie's year. They're best friends."
"How do you know him?"
She shrugs. "We hooked up before summer started."
My jaw drops. "What? How did I not know!?"
"You were too busy with James to actually notice that I had a sneaky link sometimes."
I look in the direction she's looking, over to the stairs leading back to the house, where Marco and Vinnie are talking to Matteo.
Now that I think about it, I kind of know him. I've seen him at parties, in America and in Italy, everywhere, really, but just because it was the place to be for people at our school. The reason I noticed him was because he's always shouting something or pouring people drinks.
Also, he's got tattoos. There's a scale on his calf, something on the side of his neck and on his arms. And even though he's wearing a t-shirt now, I can tell he works out by the way his biceps bulge as he crosses his arms.
"He looks good." I say, deciding to look away.
"He fucks good, too."
I throw her a look. "Good to know."
She smiles and then holds her glass up. "Fuck it, let's have fun."
I nod, knocking my glass against hers. "Agreed."
Then, I spot someone sitting down on a lounge chair talking to a blonde girl I've also seen around.
"Isabella." I say, before I'm out of my chair and already making my way towards my roommate. "I'll be right back." I tell Raisa, who waves me off.
She can take care of herself at a party, for sure.
Isabella sees me approaching and gets up from the lounge chair, excitedly opening her arms. I like her. She's one of the few people I decided not to cut off after high school. She's the type of friend who you don't have to talk to everyday for the friendship to still be intact when you come back. It's based on mutual love and unspoken loyalty because we've been through a lot together. I know that what we talk about stays between us, and she knows it too. I can tell by her eyes. You can always tell based on the eyes.
"Valentinaa!" she exclaims, hugging me when we're close enough. I hug her back, squeezing her a little to let her know that I've missed her.
The blonde looks up and extends her hand without standing up. "I'm Ariana."
"Valentina."
She smiles at me, but I can't tell if it's fake.
"What are you doing here? I thought you were in Spain!" I tell Isabella as she takes a sip from my gin.
"I just came back tonight." She smiles. "What have you been up to these past few weeks?"
I think about how I've literally done nothing but pretending to read, scroll on my phone, and watch the occasional movie on N*****x.
"Some self-care." I sum up, wiggling my eyebrows to laugh it off. "You?"
"Same thing. I just laid in the sun all day and watched hot surfers showing off."
"Well, you've had a better summer than mine then." I tell her, just as Ariana chimes in.
"We should go see the boys." She tells Isabella and cocks her head with a look that lets me know it's code for something. Then she looks in my direction, and back at Isabella.
"Do you want to come with?" Isabella asks, motioning with her head towards the villa.
I think about it for a moment, because I have no idea what they're talking about or if I'd like to see these 'boys', but I know it can't be that bad.
"Sure."
Ariana replies to a text on her phone and steps out in front of us, leading the way.
I look around for Raisa but can't find her, so I decide to text her that I'm going inside for a bit. I can't help but feel responsible for her, even though she's the one who suggested we come here.
We climb up the same flight of circular stairs, but we go one level higher, onto a large balcony overlooking the east side of the cliffs.
Ariana slides a door open and we enter a large hallway with doors on each side. I follow them to the door on the left, which opens into a suite.
I stop by the door and watch as Ariana opens yet another door on the left of the hallway, to reveal a bathroom. There are two people in there, and I recognize both. One of them is Marco Giudice holding up a plate and the other one is Eddie Barone, bending over to snort white lines off it.
"Where's Matty?" Ariana asks and I make eye contact with Marco. He looks at me weirdly, like he's ashamed that I just caught him trying to snort coke off a plate in a bathroom.
"Bedroom." Marco answers after looking away from me.
Ariana closes the door and walks further along the hallway before finally reaching the bedroom.
"We're here." Isabella announces and plops herself down on the bed next to the guy from before, Matteo, then kisses his cheek. Vinnie is sitting on the couch next to the bed, looking surprised to see me. I look down at Matteo, who is in the process of separating a small pile of cocaine into not-so-small lines.
I should be alarmed by the amount on the plate for legal reasons, but I don't know why I'm not even slightly surprised by the situation. Private schools, private jets, private villas, everything that's private means people have the means to pay to protect their secrets.
My father does it too, even though I'm pretty sure he thinks no one has picked up on it. Private planes, bigger houses, better cars, more money, more business trips, which he never talks about. Cameras outside and high stone fences. And my mother is either oblivious or plays like she's oblivious. The first option is the scarier one.
"You want one?"
I snap back to reality and look at Matteo. He's holding up the plate in one hand, a rolled-up bill in the other.
"Sure." I say and take the bill from his hand.
I push my hair back. "Can you stand up and hold it so I don't have to lean down?" I ask.
He looks up at me surprised, like I'd just given him an order or something, not moving an inch. I take the plate from his hand and ask Isabella to hold it. She shoots Matteo an annoyed look before she stands up and holds the plate for me.
"Here you go."
I look down at the line, then at Matteo, before I lean my head over the plate and inhale the line through the bill.
My nose burns for a split second as I place the bill on the plate, then it's over.
"Good shit, right?" Ariana asks me as she takes over the plate.
I shrug. My nose hasn't gone numb yet, so we'll see.
My update schedule will be 5-6 chapters a week, Tuesday through Sunday :D
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MatteoManhattan, New York, United States 2019 - autumnWhen he got into Hamilton College in New York, Matteo didn't even react. He wasn't aware that he had applied in the first place. His father had suggested America to him when he just turned fourteen in 2013, about to start his last year of middle school in Palermo."Why America?" Matteo asked. He liked his life in Italy. He had friends, activities, and nothing ever stressed him out. That was before he discovered the drug greenhouses in their backyard and saw his father pointing a gun at someone on Christmas that same year.
Around 9pm, Matteo's phone beeps in his pocket. He's just about to start a new game of Fifa alone (since his brother and Vinnie both spend time on campus on weekdays).Isabella Altieri:arriving in 2He turns off his PS4 and walks over to the desk. He takes a plate full of powder cocaine out of the drawer and quickly fixes himself a line. Sure enough, Isabella's laugh is heard from down the hall and the door opens. She comes in with numerous shopping bags and Valentina trailing behind her, also holding a vast number of bags."We're back!" Isabella sings and drops the load of bags on the floor in the corner by the mini bar."You didn't hold back
"Sophia ended up not going to Portugal for her Erasmus semester and is coming back. She texted me this morning asking if we want to meet for coffee tomorrow."Matteo tries to focus on both his friend's problems as well as fixing them with a bit of cocaine."Do you want to see her?"Vinnie shrugs. "I mean, I don't know. The last months we saw each other it was very toxic, and it ended up draining the life out of me. But I still care about her.""I mean...man. Look. She cheated on you and then blamed you for not being affectionate enough.""We weren't...dating."
ValentinaManhattan, New York, United States 2019 - autumnBuying cocaine from Aleksi is not how I planned my first day of November to go. But, in my defense, I nearly fell asleep in the club yesterday after driving for four hours down to New York as soon as we finished classes. Get to The Plaza, get dressed, get ready to drink, do it all night, and then be ready to do the same tomorrow. It's just not possible for a normal human being who has done a lot of self-care and going to sleep early for the past three months.Raisa had left with Matteo at some point during the night and Aleksi told me that he'd sleep in her bed. Before we went to sleep that early morning, I asked him if he could get me a gram of coke for tomorrow
"Happy birthday!" I say, hugging her from behind once I find her.She's excited to see me so we step away from the crowd to talk more privately. I hand her the gift bag and she happily takes out what I put in there. There are three books, all of them mentioned by her in the past few months, one of them being a book for our joint course in Business Psychology, which is hard to find."You're the best, oh my GOD!" she exclaims, hugging me again. Out of the corner of my eye I see Matteo looking at me while talking to Vinnie, and my instinct tells me he might be asking Vinnie about me.I've seen him around campus a couple of time since I started my first year, and after every time I forget that he exists it seems as though everyone around me knows him personally, has some history with him, or at least knowsofhim.
"So what should I do?" Vinnie asks, still not understanding what I'm trying to say.I shrug and watch Matteo do the first line. Before I can answer, Marco buts in. "Have sex with someone else. There are tons of girls who have a crush on you and I think you should have fun for a while. You've been with the same person for years now.""Plus, Austria in December." Matteo adds and holds out the phone and the rolled-up bill to me. I look down at the phone, wondering whether I should just take it out of his hand and bring it up closer to my nose or if I should just bend down awkwardly in my heels.Before I can decide though, the phone is brought closer, so I don't have to lift a finger. "Thank you." I tell Matteo and hand the bill over to Vinnie.The right side of my face goes numb a few minutes later and I tap it with my fingers. "Good shit, right?" Marco asks, nodding."Yeah." I smile. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Matteo nodding along.***Somehow around ten people end up going to M
"What bullshit?""Allison bullshit." She says, as if it's supposed to give me any information. "Do you want to go home? We can sleep at Adrik's place.""Why not at your hotel?" Isabella asks, indirectly agreeing to my idea.
MatteoPalermo, Sicily, Italy 2019/2020 – winterWaking up on Christmas Eve in Palermo always makes Matteo feel nostalgic. The smell of cheesecake coming from downstairs mixed with the cigar smoke coming out of his father's lounge as he has guests over, his mother cooking downstairs while also trying to teach Aurora something, and the never-ending Christmas lights flashing outside his window. That's how he's been waking up every December 24th since he was born.When he was younger, he would go outside and play with Marco until it was time for dinner before they got into bed and slept thinking of Santa. As he got older, he started going out with his friends and coming back after curfew just to fall right asleep. And for the
“Paulo thought it ended after she ratted him out at your New Year’s Eve party.”The way he uses the verb ‘ratted’ makes Matteo feel sick.“So? He likes her, I guess.”“Has he tried to contact her?”“I think so.”“And did she answer?”“Shouldn’t you already know this is you have a cell tower? Vinnie is right next door.”Matteo suddenly realizes that his father can also probably see everything on his phone.“Don’t worry, we don’t track the phones of our family. Nor the Barone family. I am asking you sincerely.”“I don’t think she replied, no.”“So, it’s obvious she won’t be coming back to him. Get him to stop trying.”“I can’t tell him what to do, and I also don’t want to tell him what to do.”His father looks at his face, as if to check whether Matteo means it or not. He does.“How do you know who Sofia is? And why isn’t Paulo talking to me directly like he usually does?” Matteo asks.“I know her because Paulo told me what happened. And I told you.”“Fine.”“So you’ll talk to Vinnie?”
“Not really.”Matteo can’t lie and tell him that the description matches no one ever. He thinks about that time after Vinnie’s birthday, when he stayed up until the next evening with Valentina.Just because they enjoyed being around each other. When he didn’t have to check his phone or thinks of ways to entertain himself to avoid awkwardness.She was interesting and she talked about things he’s never talked about with anyone else before. He could be himself around her, and sex wasn’t even on his mind that night, nor on that day when he ended up in bed with Ariana.But she’s also insanely attractive. Not only hot, but beautiful too. And smart.Sure, he’d like to have sex with her, it would probably be enjoyable. And if it never happened, fine. Maybe.“Are you even listening?”“Not really.”“Are you high?”“Aren’t you?”Vinnie laughs at that.Matteo still doesn’t know how to bring up Valentina. They always talk about everything they do, especially when it comes to girls.“Is something g
Chapter 17Where it all beginsMatteoCapo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 22ndAs soon as Vinnie and the rest of Valentina’s guests arrive, the atmosphere around Matteo changes. He’s not as relaxed anymore, and he feels like he has to take care of five things at once before he can actually enjoy himself.First, there’s Ariana, who has been texting him more than usual since he woke up this morning. Then there’s Vinnie, who keeps asking him if he’s okay and if he’s having fun, which forces Matteo to smile and assure him that he’s okay.The third reason is the photo he saw in Valentina’s brother’s room, which he now knows he’s seen it before. In Aurora’s room, above her desk. Valentina is also somewhere in the mix, because he’s also consciously aware of her presence now.Ariana is telling him something about her past two days, but all Matteo can focus on now is that Isabella and Valentina are talking about him.“I’ll be right back.” He says to Ariana before walking over to the two of them.“Wh
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 23rd, 2020Everyone sings happy birthday to me at midnight, even though it’s more symbolic that factually accurate, and it makes me uncomfortable but happy.We did some shots after, then Isaac tried to flirt with me for what seemed like forever, before Isabella finally saved me and brought me out by the pool half an hour later.Matteo and Vinnie are in their own world, talking on the other side of the pool.“What do you think they’re talking about?”We’ve been people watching for the past twenty minutes since we sat down.“I don’t know, what do boys even talk about all day?”“No clue. And I have a brother at home.”“They seem to have a very interesting discussion. Matteo looks serious, like he’s scared even.”“How can you even tell?”
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 23rd, 2020 Everyone sings happy birthday to me at midnight, even though it’s more symbolic that factually accurate, and it makes me uncomfortable but happy. We did some shots after, then Isaac tried to flirt with me for what seemed like forever, before Isabella finally saved me and brought me out by the pool half an hour later. Matteo and Vinnie are in their own world, talking on the other side of the pool. “What do you think they’re talking about?” We’ve been people watching for the past twenty minutes since we sat down. “I don’t know, what do boys even talk about all day?” “No clue. And I have a brother at home.” “They seem to have a very interesting discussion. Matteo looks serious, like he’s scared even.” “How can you even tell?” “I know him.” He turns his head, as if he already knew we were talking about him. We make eye contact before he turns back to Vinnie. “Something’s off with him.” Isabella notices. “You think?” “He’s hiding somet
“Are you even listening to me?”“Sorry, I’m not.”“Are you checking out Isaac?”I look to where she’s pointing, realizing that Isaac and Vinnie are sharing a joint right behind where Matteo and Ariana are.“Uh, maybe.”“Is something wrong? Do you not feel comfortable?”I shake my head. “No, it’s not that.”“You’ve barely drunk anything. Usually, you’re already four drinks in and have had a line or something.”“I’m fine. I just feel like…I don’t know. Like I want to do something. My energy is all over the place.”“Do something? Like what?”“I don’t know.”“Or maybe do someone?”She wiggles her eyebrows, and I know she’s referring to Isaac.“With Isaac? I don’t know.”“You’ve already done it and it was fine. Plus, he wouldn’t have come all the way from Russia for no reason.”“I don’t know if I like him or not.”“You said the sex was great. And he’s an easy choice if you feel horny.”“Hmm, maybe. I don’t know. I guess I want something new.”“What about Matteo?”I panic inside for a secon
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 21st, 2020Isabella and I spend the rest of the day by the pool, until the sun starts to set on the horizon, and it gets too cold to just chill in a bathing suit.“I want to order pizza.”I look up from my book to where Matteo is sitting by the edge of the pool, his legs in the water.“Yes, please.” Isabella groans. “I’m so hungry I could die. Where are you ordering from?”“I know a place.”Matteo and I make eye contact for a moment, before his eyes drift back to the screen. A few seconds later he starts talking to someone in Italian, so I zone out and try to focus back on my book.The pizzas arrive twenty minutes later and we sit down at one of the tables on the terrace.“What time are people arriving tomorrow?” he asks me then with his mouth half full.“I don’t know, I guess around seven or eight? Might be sooner.”We eat our pizzas in peace after that, and then decide to watch a movie before going to bed. We’re all tired from sitting in the sound all d
The way she kisses is incredible; it’s deep and dirty, like she’s enjoying it, and it’s exactly what Matteo likes. It’s turning him on so much it’s almost ridiculous, and his brain suddenly thinks of her saying she’s never had sex in the sea. The thought excites him even more, so he tangles one of his hands in the back of her head, softly pulling at her roots. She moans, and unlike before, it’s an outright moan that points to pleasure. “Fuck, don’t do that.” She says into his mouth. He smiles then. “Why?” “It turns me on.” Her blunt answer makes the inside of his brain collapse, but she continues kissing him, grinding herself against him. Matteo could swear his knees just went weak, so he tries to compose himself. Suddenly, she pulls her face away and untangles her legs from his waist. “Shit.” Matteo turns his head to where she’s looking, and they see Isabella appearing from behind the bushes, focused on carrying three
Taormina, Sicily – July 20th 2020His father leaves the next day, saying that he has some business to take care of in New York with Paulo, but not without telling him to be in Taormina at the beginning of August.Matteo finds himself alone in the house when he wakes up, so he gets some coffee from the kitchen and goes to sit on the upper terrace overlooking the sea.His mind takes him back to what Valentina said about never being sad if she were to live at sea. He isn’t sad, but he’s definitely bored, so he texts Vinnie, Ariana, and Isabella, asking each of them what they’re doing.Vinnie’s text comes first.Vinnie: going to Sofia’s todayMatteo rolls his eyes and doesn’t even bother replying. He’s over the whole thing already.His phone vibrates again just as he lights his second cigarette.Ariana: bored in Milan