"What bullshit?"
"Allison bullshit." She says, as if it's supposed to give me any information. "Do you want to go home? We can sleep at Adrik's place."
"Why not at your hotel?" Isabella asks, indirectly agreeing to my idea.
"I think Raisa's brother is there."
Isabella nods. "Call an Uber. I'll wait here."
I set out on a mission to find our coats, call an Uber, and also inform Adrik of our decision. I find him on the balcony, smoking a cigarette with Matteo, Marco, and Allison.
"I'm leaving. Give me your key?"
Adrik makes a face but starts looking through his pockets nonetheless.
"You going alone?" he asks, switching to Russian.
"No, I'm going with Isabella. I'll leave the door open."
"I'll sleep here." Adrik announces and I shoot him a weird look.
"Since when?"
Adrik shrugs. "Since now?"
"Fine."
I hold out the hand to him and he places his apartment keys in it.
"The address is on the family groupchat." He adds in English.
"Yeah, thanks."
I wait by the bar for a couple of minutes until a driver accepts my ride then go to find Isabella when he's five minutes away.
The apartment is on the twentieth floor so getting downstairs in front of the building from the inside of the apartment takes just about five minutes.
"Do you have your phone?" I check with Isabella while we wait for the elevator. "Yes." She smiles, not opening her eyes.
When we get inside the elevator, she leans against the mirror, exhaling.
"In case you're wondering what my problem with Allison is." She starts, keeping her eyes closed. "She made anything she wanted out of Matteo's life for four years. Was jealous over my friendship with him and filled his head with lies. She's not a nice person. And I thought Matteo was over it, I mean, it's been over a year. But she's here, and if they start again I'm going to lose my shit. He deserves better."
I smile. "You love him?"
"Of course, I do. That's why I want what's best for him."
I nod, just as the elevator comes to a halt and the double doors open to reveal an empty lobby, save for the one night-shift receptionist. The car is already outside, so I help Isabella climb inside and lean against the other window.
"I'm not going to sit by and watch him be a doormat anymore." She drunkenly says out of nowhere, before she dozes off against the window for the rest of the twenty-five-minute car ride.
***
I wake up around two in the afternoon the next day, well-rested but with a puffy face and a weird taste in my mouth. Isabella is still sleeping next to me in Adrik's bed, so I grab my phone from the nightstand and quietly walk out of the room.
I open one of the kitchen windows and light a cigarette as I pull up my texts with Adrik. Valentina: where are you?
While I wait for an answer, I choose the cappuccino option on the coffee machine and look at the photos taped to the fridge.
There's one of our family this year in August for Adrik's eighteenth birthday, smiling from ear to ear because we went to Sardinia for the occasion. There's another one of him and his teammates at an ice hockey game championship they ended up winning last year. There's several more of him and his friends from school, at parties, and in aesthetic places.
I've never even seen these photos because he only posts on I*******m three times a year and doesn't really share his life with me or my parents. At least, not as much as I'm starting to.
My eyes fall on a photo buried under three other photos in the down right corner of the fridge. I crouch down and take it off the fridge. It's of Adrik on the beach, kissing a girl's temple. She has blonde hair curled at the ends and is turned with her back to the camera, hugging Adrik's waist. I recognize the beach. It's in Capo d'Orlando, where we would sometimes go at night to eat dinner by the sea.
The phone buzzes on the counter so I put the photo back and go to check my messages.
Adrik: on the way back now
Adrik: u?
Valentina: your place
I lean against the open window with my coffee and another cigarette. Who's that girl in the photo?
Fifteen minutes later, the intercom rings and I let Adrik in the building. "You look well." I sarcastically say when I see his disheveled hair and dark circles. "Spare me." he replies, dropping down on a chair in the kitchen.
"Do you want some coffee?" I ask, even though the actual thing I want to talk about is that girl in the photo.
"Yes, please."
We listen to the coffee machine getting to work, neither of us saying anything. "Are you hanging out with Marco Giudice now?" I ask.
"Yes."
"Since when?"
He rolls his eyes at me. "Since last year."
"You have any girlfriends?" I continue, realizing that I sound exactly like mom. "You sound like mom." Adrik says, running a hand through his hair.
"I saw a photo on your fridge with a girl." I say, cutting straight to the point. He raises his eyebrows and leans back in the chair.
"And?"
"Who's that?"
"I can't tell you."
"Oh, come on."
He shakes his head. "She asked me not to tell. Plus, that's over now."
I purse my lips, not satisfied with the answer at all, but knowing it was the most I'm going to get for now.
"Do I know her?"
"Valentina." He sternly says, crossing his arms.
"So I do." I smirk, then put the coffee in front of him.
"Don't start snooping, I mean it." he says, pointing his finger at me. "Just find something to do, I swear."
"Ouch."
"I'm serious, Valentina. I promised her nobody would find out."
I laugh. "Seriously?"
"Yes. We ended it when school started."
"Fine."
I watch him drink his coffee. "Are you okay though?"
He nods, looking genuine.
"Fine. Then I'll stay out of it."
Adrik squints at me. "I don't believe you. You can't let stuff go."
I feel offended for a moment, so I sit down at the table across from him so he can look me in the eye.
"I can let stuff go, and I have. I won't bother you about it. I just want to know you. We haven't talked in months."
He shrugs. "I've been busy with school, and you're in university now. I'm fine, I just don't share that much."
I sigh, but then I get an idea.
"Oh no, no." Adrik says, shaking his head.
"What?"
"You've got that look on your face when you're about to suggest we play a game. And if I lose, I have to share something with you."
I pout. "No I wasn't about to do that." Lie.
Adrik looks me straight in the eyes. "Valentina. I used to love those games when we were younger, but right now things are more serious and we both have responsibilities."
"Right." I snort, remembering how my senior year was mostly me going out and not having any responsibilities. And up until now, my first year of university is looking pretty much the same.
Adrik stands up from the table. "I'm going to go take a shower."
"What if we played on your Xbox?" I try, following him into the living room. "Haha, you wouldn't last a second."
I raise my eyebrows at him. "Try me."
"Fine. But we're playing Fifa, and you're not allowed to use overhead controls."
We shake on it, and five minutes later I've picked my Spanish team and he's gone with his favorite team.
The game is boring, and by halftime it's 5-0 for him, but I've missed doing anything with him. Before I even get the chance to tell him that, the second half of the game starts and I end up losing 8-1.
"You did put up a fight at the end, I'll give you that." He says, watching the screen go black. "I missed playing with you." I tell him, and he stops by the door.
"I missed playing with you too." He smiles, then disappears down the hall. "But these constant games you keep wanting to play will be the death of you."
---
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MatteoPalermo, Sicily, Italy 2019/2020 – winterWaking up on Christmas Eve in Palermo always makes Matteo feel nostalgic. The smell of cheesecake coming from downstairs mixed with the cigar smoke coming out of his father's lounge as he has guests over, his mother cooking downstairs while also trying to teach Aurora something, and the never-ending Christmas lights flashing outside his window. That's how he's been waking up every December 24th since he was born.When he was younger, he would go outside and play with Marco until it was time for dinner before they got into bed and slept thinking of Santa. As he got older, he started going out with his friends and coming back after curfew just to fall right asleep. And for the
"License and registration?""Is there a problem?" Matteo asks as he looks through the glovebox on the passenger's side for the registration and insurance."Is this your
There's a special smoking room inside the restaurant but there's always someone there so they go outside, a far enough away from the security guy until they're sure he's out of earshot. No one says a word until they've both lit their cigarettes and are completely focused on each other."Did you know before?" Vinnie asks."Knowwhat? Explain."
On New Year's Eve they meet at Vinnie's house around 8pm to get the last few details in order before the party starts. Isabella and Vinnie mainly took care of the organization and inviting people, but Matteo promised he would take care of the drugs. Paulo and his wife Diana chose to go to Capo d'Orlando last minute, sothey stayed in Palermo. About sixty people were invited either from their school, friends they've made abroad and all over Italy, as well as 'plus-one's' as Isabella called them. Well, she called Sophia and Allison plus one's because, in her words, she 'didn't consider them friends and they didn't
ValentinaMoscow, Russia, 2019/2020 – winterIsabella:do you want to party in Italy for new years?Adrik taps me on the shoulder and I look up at him, coming back to reality. It's Christmas Eve and we're at a Christmas dinner. The room is filled with relatives and my father's business associates, at one of the hotels he's decided on investing in.It's the first time we have ever held the family Christmas dinner outside of our house in Moscow, but my father explained that his associates have also been considered family for years now and that he would like to try out something new.'Something new' meant inviting everyone who usually came to the famil
The party is at a townhouse in what most people call "The Golden Mile" area of the city which is close to the Kremlin. It's very well known for the fact that it houses Moscow's richest and most influential people: billionaires, politicians, businessmen, and celebrities.When I was younger, I would stare at the buildings as I walked by, wishing I'd live in one of those townhouses one day. But ever since we've moved out of the city to a gated community in Zhukovka on the outskirts of Moscow, I don't regret it one bit. Nothing beats waking up on Christmas morning in my own room with a view of our gardens covered in sno
"He's coming over here, I'm dying." Raisa says and I shush her as we both watch Isaac making his way over to us."You look familiar." He tells me and I exchange glances with Raisa."We used to go to the same middle school."
"This summer in Taormina, or at Matteo's apartment. It's so cute how he gets all fidgety around you.""I haven't noticed." I say, trying to remember the last time I talked to Marco and whether there were any cues. I don't like Raisa putting things in my head because I know she likes to gossip and may make things up just so she could have something to talk about. "And I'm not interested in anyone anyway right now. I want to focus on myself for a while.""Valentina, it seems like you've been doing that your whole life.""That's not fair. I was with Jamie for years.""Yes, and you spent all of your time with him and began ignoring your friends." I frown. "Not on purpose though.""Yes, I know. But I'm just saying, it's okay to have
“Paulo thought it ended after she ratted him out at your New Year’s Eve party.”The way he uses the verb ‘ratted’ makes Matteo feel sick.“So? He likes her, I guess.”“Has he tried to contact her?”“I think so.”“And did she answer?”“Shouldn’t you already know this is you have a cell tower? Vinnie is right next door.”Matteo suddenly realizes that his father can also probably see everything on his phone.“Don’t worry, we don’t track the phones of our family. Nor the Barone family. I am asking you sincerely.”“I don’t think she replied, no.”“So, it’s obvious she won’t be coming back to him. Get him to stop trying.”“I can’t tell him what to do, and I also don’t want to tell him what to do.”His father looks at his face, as if to check whether Matteo means it or not. He does.“How do you know who Sofia is? And why isn’t Paulo talking to me directly like he usually does?” Matteo asks.“I know her because Paulo told me what happened. And I told you.”“Fine.”“So you’ll talk to Vinnie?”
“Not really.”Matteo can’t lie and tell him that the description matches no one ever. He thinks about that time after Vinnie’s birthday, when he stayed up until the next evening with Valentina.Just because they enjoyed being around each other. When he didn’t have to check his phone or thinks of ways to entertain himself to avoid awkwardness.She was interesting and she talked about things he’s never talked about with anyone else before. He could be himself around her, and sex wasn’t even on his mind that night, nor on that day when he ended up in bed with Ariana.But she’s also insanely attractive. Not only hot, but beautiful too. And smart.Sure, he’d like to have sex with her, it would probably be enjoyable. And if it never happened, fine. Maybe.“Are you even listening?”“Not really.”“Are you high?”“Aren’t you?”Vinnie laughs at that.Matteo still doesn’t know how to bring up Valentina. They always talk about everything they do, especially when it comes to girls.“Is something g
Chapter 17Where it all beginsMatteoCapo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 22ndAs soon as Vinnie and the rest of Valentina’s guests arrive, the atmosphere around Matteo changes. He’s not as relaxed anymore, and he feels like he has to take care of five things at once before he can actually enjoy himself.First, there’s Ariana, who has been texting him more than usual since he woke up this morning. Then there’s Vinnie, who keeps asking him if he’s okay and if he’s having fun, which forces Matteo to smile and assure him that he’s okay.The third reason is the photo he saw in Valentina’s brother’s room, which he now knows he’s seen it before. In Aurora’s room, above her desk. Valentina is also somewhere in the mix, because he’s also consciously aware of her presence now.Ariana is telling him something about her past two days, but all Matteo can focus on now is that Isabella and Valentina are talking about him.“I’ll be right back.” He says to Ariana before walking over to the two of them.“Wh
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 23rd, 2020Everyone sings happy birthday to me at midnight, even though it’s more symbolic that factually accurate, and it makes me uncomfortable but happy.We did some shots after, then Isaac tried to flirt with me for what seemed like forever, before Isabella finally saved me and brought me out by the pool half an hour later.Matteo and Vinnie are in their own world, talking on the other side of the pool.“What do you think they’re talking about?”We’ve been people watching for the past twenty minutes since we sat down.“I don’t know, what do boys even talk about all day?”“No clue. And I have a brother at home.”“They seem to have a very interesting discussion. Matteo looks serious, like he’s scared even.”“How can you even tell?”
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 23rd, 2020 Everyone sings happy birthday to me at midnight, even though it’s more symbolic that factually accurate, and it makes me uncomfortable but happy. We did some shots after, then Isaac tried to flirt with me for what seemed like forever, before Isabella finally saved me and brought me out by the pool half an hour later. Matteo and Vinnie are in their own world, talking on the other side of the pool. “What do you think they’re talking about?” We’ve been people watching for the past twenty minutes since we sat down. “I don’t know, what do boys even talk about all day?” “No clue. And I have a brother at home.” “They seem to have a very interesting discussion. Matteo looks serious, like he’s scared even.” “How can you even tell?” “I know him.” He turns his head, as if he already knew we were talking about him. We make eye contact before he turns back to Vinnie. “Something’s off with him.” Isabella notices. “You think?” “He’s hiding somet
“Are you even listening to me?”“Sorry, I’m not.”“Are you checking out Isaac?”I look to where she’s pointing, realizing that Isaac and Vinnie are sharing a joint right behind where Matteo and Ariana are.“Uh, maybe.”“Is something wrong? Do you not feel comfortable?”I shake my head. “No, it’s not that.”“You’ve barely drunk anything. Usually, you’re already four drinks in and have had a line or something.”“I’m fine. I just feel like…I don’t know. Like I want to do something. My energy is all over the place.”“Do something? Like what?”“I don’t know.”“Or maybe do someone?”She wiggles her eyebrows, and I know she’s referring to Isaac.“With Isaac? I don’t know.”“You’ve already done it and it was fine. Plus, he wouldn’t have come all the way from Russia for no reason.”“I don’t know if I like him or not.”“You said the sex was great. And he’s an easy choice if you feel horny.”“Hmm, maybe. I don’t know. I guess I want something new.”“What about Matteo?”I panic inside for a secon
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 21st, 2020Isabella and I spend the rest of the day by the pool, until the sun starts to set on the horizon, and it gets too cold to just chill in a bathing suit.“I want to order pizza.”I look up from my book to where Matteo is sitting by the edge of the pool, his legs in the water.“Yes, please.” Isabella groans. “I’m so hungry I could die. Where are you ordering from?”“I know a place.”Matteo and I make eye contact for a moment, before his eyes drift back to the screen. A few seconds later he starts talking to someone in Italian, so I zone out and try to focus back on my book.The pizzas arrive twenty minutes later and we sit down at one of the tables on the terrace.“What time are people arriving tomorrow?” he asks me then with his mouth half full.“I don’t know, I guess around seven or eight? Might be sooner.”We eat our pizzas in peace after that, and then decide to watch a movie before going to bed. We’re all tired from sitting in the sound all d
The way she kisses is incredible; it’s deep and dirty, like she’s enjoying it, and it’s exactly what Matteo likes. It’s turning him on so much it’s almost ridiculous, and his brain suddenly thinks of her saying she’s never had sex in the sea. The thought excites him even more, so he tangles one of his hands in the back of her head, softly pulling at her roots. She moans, and unlike before, it’s an outright moan that points to pleasure. “Fuck, don’t do that.” She says into his mouth. He smiles then. “Why?” “It turns me on.” Her blunt answer makes the inside of his brain collapse, but she continues kissing him, grinding herself against him. Matteo could swear his knees just went weak, so he tries to compose himself. Suddenly, she pulls her face away and untangles her legs from his waist. “Shit.” Matteo turns his head to where she’s looking, and they see Isabella appearing from behind the bushes, focused on carrying three
Taormina, Sicily – July 20th 2020His father leaves the next day, saying that he has some business to take care of in New York with Paulo, but not without telling him to be in Taormina at the beginning of August.Matteo finds himself alone in the house when he wakes up, so he gets some coffee from the kitchen and goes to sit on the upper terrace overlooking the sea.His mind takes him back to what Valentina said about never being sad if she were to live at sea. He isn’t sad, but he’s definitely bored, so he texts Vinnie, Ariana, and Isabella, asking each of them what they’re doing.Vinnie’s text comes first.Vinnie: going to Sofia’s todayMatteo rolls his eyes and doesn’t even bother replying. He’s over the whole thing already.His phone vibrates again just as he lights his second cigarette.Ariana: bored in Milan