"He's coming over here, I'm dying." Raisa says and I shush her as we both watch Isaac making his way over to us.
"You look familiar." He tells me and I exchange glances with Raisa.
"We used to go to the same middle school."
"What's your name again?"
"I never told you my name." I tell him, not falling for his little trick. "Valentina."
"I saw you at the club in Manhattan a few months ago, that's why you seem familiar." He says, snapping his fingers and smiling.
"Maybe." I smile at him. He's still attractive and he's got that sort of baby face with the jawline that I like when it comes to guys.
"You know Matteo Giudice?"
I shrug. "I guess."
"I know him." Raisa interjects. "Why?"
"He's a friend of mine, I think it was his party."
"How do you know him?" Raisa asks.
"We were classmates for two years in high school after I moved to New York."
"How come I never saw you?" Raisa asks, leaning forwards and taking over the conversation.
"Uh...I didn't really attend school." Isaac says, not taking his eyes off me. I pretend to look down at my drink to let them talk, even though I can feel him watching me.
"And what do you study now?" Raisa asks, even if we both know the answer.
"World Economics at NYU."
The conversation drifts off after that and I pretend not to notice that Isaac is going out of his way to make conversation with me while Raisa obviously wants his attention. Two hours after midnight I get bored and decide it's time to go home. Raise decides to stay and keep partying with Isaac, but my entire body is telling me to just go home and go to sleep, so I listen to it.
I get home around 3am and the house is dead silent. My parents usually have a few friends over on New Year's, but it looks like that has already ended. I know Adrik is with some friends, so I don't even bother checking if he's awake as I make my way to my room.
"What are you going to do about the situation?" I hear my mother's voice down the hall. It's coming from my father's office. There's light coming from under the door, and I take off my boots so I can walk closer without being heard.
"I don't know. I don't want to repeat history again."
"Was it a misunderstanding?"
I don't hear what my father replies, so I step even closer, only a few steps away from the door now.
"They're saying we instigated it." My father says and I squint, making up a scenario in my head so I can have the slightest idea what he means.
"Did you?"
"Not as far as I know. We didn't send any men out to Europe during the holidays." "What did you tell their families?"
"We told them that they got lost at sea."
So, someone did die.
"Does it have the potential to become dangerous?" my mother asks, I can tell by her tone she's getting worried.
"I think we'll sort it out soon enough. I'll reason with them."
The conversation drifts to small talk, which means they're going to finish soon, so I turn around and tiptoe back into my room. I fall asleep wondering who died and why my parents were talking about it.
***
We fly back to New York three days later on Saturday the 4th with the company private plane, which always takes us from the private airport outside Moscow to the private landing strip near Albany, where a car would be waiting for us to take us to Hamilton College.
Adrik takes the seat in the corner closest to the door and puts his headphones on before we even take off. It was a nine-hour flight, and even though we left at seven in the evening, we would be arriving in our dorms around eleven pm local time. I'm trying to be smart about jet lag and not sleep until I get to my room.
Raisa chooses to sit across from me in the left corner and Aleksi takes the space across the aisle from us, busying himself on his laptop. As soon as the plane is off the ground I busy myself with a new book by Paulo Coehlo, but Raisa gets bored scrolling on her phone soon enough so she starts up a conversation.
"Did you hear about what happened in Sicily?" she asks, crossing her legs and leaning back in her chair, ready to talk.
I close my book, already knowing that it won't be a short conversation if it involves Matteo. But as long as it was distracting me from thinking about a hundred different scenarios of my parents being involved in a crime, I didn't mind.
"No, what?"
"So apparently someone called the police on the party saying there were drugs involved and everyone got busted. Matteo, Vinnie, Eddie and Marco were taken into custody with like half a kilogram of cocaine and weed."
"Oh shit." I say, genuinely feeling worried about Vinnie, especially. "Where are they now? What happened?"
"A friend told me that they took them down to the station and let them go thirty minutes later."
My mouth falls open. "What? What about the drugs?"
Raisa shrugs. "I don't know. I think the police kept it."
"Are they under investigation?"
"Not as far as I know." She says, looking at Aleksi, who also seems interested in the conversation. "What do you know?"
"Just that they're fine. Nobody pressed charges."
Raisa looks at me in a knowing way. "See? I told you they were mafia."
I roll my eyes but then I also see Aleksi nodding. "Wait, you believe that shit too?"
"I do."
I look at him incredulously.
"It's sounds made up but they are in the mafia." Aleksi states. "I've seen their bodyguards, I've heard stories."
"Plus, they own the police and that's why they never get into trouble."
I still seem reluctant, but Aleksi looks at me with a serious look. "Valentina, you have no idea how deep and dark these things can get."
What's that even supposed to mean?
"Anyway, I'm pretty sure he hooked up with Allison. She posted a photo the day after that from his house in Palermo, and I could see his cat."
Aleksi doesn't seem interested in the discussion anymore, probably because he doesn't want to hear his sister talking about some guy she's having sex with.
"How long have you been sleeping with him?" I ask.
"Uh...since Halloween?"
"And how often?"
"Every weekend, almost. Whenever we're in the same place we go to his place afterwards."
I nod. "Well, from what I hear, he just likes sleeping around and having fun. I don't think he's got anything serious going on with Allison. Or anyone, for that matter." I'm slightly hinting at the fact that she's one of those people.
"I know." She says with a hint of sadness in her voice. "But there's just something about him that makes me want to go back."
"Do you guys get along?"
"Yeah. He's funny, and he's smart. And very good in bed. I get tingles just thinking about it."
"If he gives you tingles down there, then you're definitely fucked." I tell her, not even trying to make a joke.
"I know, right?" she exclaims, excited that I'm sharing this with her. "So when did you last have sex? Have you ever had anyone else except Jamie?"
I shake my head. "It was last year and no...I haven't."
"Jesus, Valentina. I would've bet you have at least five by now!"
I shrug. "I don't know, I just-I don't know. I want it to be...spontaneous, you know? Like I want it to be exciting and I want someone to impress me- I don't know."
"You've never had a one night stand?"
I shake my head.
"So you've only ever seen one?!"
"No, I've done...stuff with other guys, but I haven't had sex sex." I explain, looking around to see if Aleksi or Adrik are listening. They're not, thank God.
"But if you had to choose one, who would you choose?"
"What? Out of who?"
"All the boys you know." She says, smirking.
I think about Vinnie first, because I've always thought he's cute and attractive, but I never really considered him as a real option because he also never seemed interested.
"I don't know, maybe Vinnie?" I say.
"Oh my God! I thought you would've said Marco."
"Adrik's friend?" I ask.
"He's friends with Adrik? He's Matteo's brother."
"Yeah. I've known him for a long time. Why would you say Marco?"
I look in Adrik's direction, but he looks like he's already asleep.
"Because he's obviously into you and you two seem cute."
"When did you even see us?"
----
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"This summer in Taormina, or at Matteo's apartment. It's so cute how he gets all fidgety around you.""I haven't noticed." I say, trying to remember the last time I talked to Marco and whether there were any cues. I don't like Raisa putting things in my head because I know she likes to gossip and may make things up just so she could have something to talk about. "And I'm not interested in anyone anyway right now. I want to focus on myself for a while.""Valentina, it seems like you've been doing that your whole life.""That's not fair. I was with Jamie for years.""Yes, and you spent all of your time with him and began ignoring your friends." I frown. "Not on purpose though.""Yes, I know. But I'm just saying, it's okay to have
MatteoManhattan, New York, United States 2020 – winter/springMatteo takes out a small silver box from the pocket by the door, then leans back into the seat. Valentina looks at his fingers, which are now holding a pre-rolled joint."Lucky how?" he asks, interested in entertaining this discussion.He can't figure out whether she's joking or being deadly serious, because she didn't even flinch nor ask questions when he told her the police let him go free for punishable offenses.Valentina watches him light up the joint. "Getting to go free when you get caught doing illegal stuff." She says, smirking at the irony of the situatio
He calls Vinnie on Thursday afternoon after he wakes up."Where are you?" Vinnie screams into the receiver to cover up the noise on his end."In bed. Where else?"
"Eddie!" Pia exclaims, crossing her arms and looking at Matteo for a second. It's hard for Matteo to think of her as Vinnie's twin. Even though she's about to turn 21 in April, he thinks of her like he thinks of Aurora: a younger sibling who needs to be protected. The fact that she usually keeps to herself and sometimes acts childish just enhances his image of her."Do you have a boyfriend?" Vinnie asks.Pia shakes her head, relaxing, and looks at Matteo again."Do you have a crush?" Isabella asks, turning to look at her."What? No!" she says, looking down at her phone."You do."Eddie screams at the TV when Matteo scores a goal, which takes the attenti
ValentinaNew York, United States 2020 – springThe club is packed when I get there a little before midnight, because Adrik took too long for once and not me. When I asked him who he was getting ready for, he told me to mind my own business.By now, the two girls at the entrance already know me and don't ask to see my ID. Instead, they place the VIP bracelet on my wrist and fake smile when they tell me to have fun. I find Isabella and Raisa talking next to one of the tables, and Adrik disappears around the time we start talking about boys."Isaac's here." Raisa informs me and points to the table next to us."So?" I drily ask. I've noticed that ever since we had those talks around New Year's, she's been much more open with me about...everything. About what she does with Matteo, how they get along, about what he's doing during the day or who he's with.Isabella steps closer. "You know Isaac?""We went to the same middle school in Moscow. He was a year older than me, and I had a crush on
An hour and a half later, Isaac and I are joined at the hip, chatting about literally anything that comes to our minds. I know my pupils are dilated to the point where my eyes are nearly black and that I'm talking way too much, but I'm having more fun with him than I thought I would. And heisfunny.I see Isabella plopped down on a couch looking lost, so I excuse myself and go over to her to see if she's okay.
"You didn't specify. And yes, we did. Molly."Matteo raises his eyebrows and looks at the boiling coffee. "Hm." He pauses. "I never would've thought he does drugs."I roll my eyes at him. "Everybody does drugs.""In theory, yes, but I think 'drugs are everywhere' would be more accurate. I just thought Isaac was always judgemental about this stuff because he plays football.""Looks like you're the judgemental one, hm?"I turn off the stove and push the pot away from the heated circle."Like you didn't judge him at first for being a football player."I blink at him with an innocent look on my face. "No, I didn't."
MatteoPalermo, Sicily, 2020 – (nearly) summerWhen Matteo decided to call Valentina and ask her to come take the exam together, he realized that begging would be his last option. When they were forced into lockdown in Italy, he didn't think about the fact that he would be spending more time with his father, and he could see first-hand how much work Matteo was putting into his studies.His father kept asking about exam dates and upcoming projects, and it all came down to Business Psychology, which was the only course where he didn't have someone who could help him pass.During the early hours of Thursday, May 28th, a private jet departed from their landing strip outside Palermo and set off towards Moscow, where it would pick up Valentina at 8am. By the time Matteo wakes up at 12:30, Valentina has already texted him that she's landing in 30 minutes.He jumps into the shower, already feeling pressured by tim. His parents have been out since yesterday and Matteo has no idea when t
“Paulo thought it ended after she ratted him out at your New Year’s Eve party.”The way he uses the verb ‘ratted’ makes Matteo feel sick.“So? He likes her, I guess.”“Has he tried to contact her?”“I think so.”“And did she answer?”“Shouldn’t you already know this is you have a cell tower? Vinnie is right next door.”Matteo suddenly realizes that his father can also probably see everything on his phone.“Don’t worry, we don’t track the phones of our family. Nor the Barone family. I am asking you sincerely.”“I don’t think she replied, no.”“So, it’s obvious she won’t be coming back to him. Get him to stop trying.”“I can’t tell him what to do, and I also don’t want to tell him what to do.”His father looks at his face, as if to check whether Matteo means it or not. He does.“How do you know who Sofia is? And why isn’t Paulo talking to me directly like he usually does?” Matteo asks.“I know her because Paulo told me what happened. And I told you.”“Fine.”“So you’ll talk to Vinnie?”
“Not really.”Matteo can’t lie and tell him that the description matches no one ever. He thinks about that time after Vinnie’s birthday, when he stayed up until the next evening with Valentina.Just because they enjoyed being around each other. When he didn’t have to check his phone or thinks of ways to entertain himself to avoid awkwardness.She was interesting and she talked about things he’s never talked about with anyone else before. He could be himself around her, and sex wasn’t even on his mind that night, nor on that day when he ended up in bed with Ariana.But she’s also insanely attractive. Not only hot, but beautiful too. And smart.Sure, he’d like to have sex with her, it would probably be enjoyable. And if it never happened, fine. Maybe.“Are you even listening?”“Not really.”“Are you high?”“Aren’t you?”Vinnie laughs at that.Matteo still doesn’t know how to bring up Valentina. They always talk about everything they do, especially when it comes to girls.“Is something g
Chapter 17Where it all beginsMatteoCapo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 22ndAs soon as Vinnie and the rest of Valentina’s guests arrive, the atmosphere around Matteo changes. He’s not as relaxed anymore, and he feels like he has to take care of five things at once before he can actually enjoy himself.First, there’s Ariana, who has been texting him more than usual since he woke up this morning. Then there’s Vinnie, who keeps asking him if he’s okay and if he’s having fun, which forces Matteo to smile and assure him that he’s okay.The third reason is the photo he saw in Valentina’s brother’s room, which he now knows he’s seen it before. In Aurora’s room, above her desk. Valentina is also somewhere in the mix, because he’s also consciously aware of her presence now.Ariana is telling him something about her past two days, but all Matteo can focus on now is that Isabella and Valentina are talking about him.“I’ll be right back.” He says to Ariana before walking over to the two of them.“Wh
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 23rd, 2020Everyone sings happy birthday to me at midnight, even though it’s more symbolic that factually accurate, and it makes me uncomfortable but happy.We did some shots after, then Isaac tried to flirt with me for what seemed like forever, before Isabella finally saved me and brought me out by the pool half an hour later.Matteo and Vinnie are in their own world, talking on the other side of the pool.“What do you think they’re talking about?”We’ve been people watching for the past twenty minutes since we sat down.“I don’t know, what do boys even talk about all day?”“No clue. And I have a brother at home.”“They seem to have a very interesting discussion. Matteo looks serious, like he’s scared even.”“How can you even tell?”
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 23rd, 2020 Everyone sings happy birthday to me at midnight, even though it’s more symbolic that factually accurate, and it makes me uncomfortable but happy. We did some shots after, then Isaac tried to flirt with me for what seemed like forever, before Isabella finally saved me and brought me out by the pool half an hour later. Matteo and Vinnie are in their own world, talking on the other side of the pool. “What do you think they’re talking about?” We’ve been people watching for the past twenty minutes since we sat down. “I don’t know, what do boys even talk about all day?” “No clue. And I have a brother at home.” “They seem to have a very interesting discussion. Matteo looks serious, like he’s scared even.” “How can you even tell?” “I know him.” He turns his head, as if he already knew we were talking about him. We make eye contact before he turns back to Vinnie. “Something’s off with him.” Isabella notices. “You think?” “He’s hiding somet
“Are you even listening to me?”“Sorry, I’m not.”“Are you checking out Isaac?”I look to where she’s pointing, realizing that Isaac and Vinnie are sharing a joint right behind where Matteo and Ariana are.“Uh, maybe.”“Is something wrong? Do you not feel comfortable?”I shake my head. “No, it’s not that.”“You’ve barely drunk anything. Usually, you’re already four drinks in and have had a line or something.”“I’m fine. I just feel like…I don’t know. Like I want to do something. My energy is all over the place.”“Do something? Like what?”“I don’t know.”“Or maybe do someone?”She wiggles her eyebrows, and I know she’s referring to Isaac.“With Isaac? I don’t know.”“You’ve already done it and it was fine. Plus, he wouldn’t have come all the way from Russia for no reason.”“I don’t know if I like him or not.”“You said the sex was great. And he’s an easy choice if you feel horny.”“Hmm, maybe. I don’t know. I guess I want something new.”“What about Matteo?”I panic inside for a secon
Capo d’Orlando, Sicily – July 21st, 2020Isabella and I spend the rest of the day by the pool, until the sun starts to set on the horizon, and it gets too cold to just chill in a bathing suit.“I want to order pizza.”I look up from my book to where Matteo is sitting by the edge of the pool, his legs in the water.“Yes, please.” Isabella groans. “I’m so hungry I could die. Where are you ordering from?”“I know a place.”Matteo and I make eye contact for a moment, before his eyes drift back to the screen. A few seconds later he starts talking to someone in Italian, so I zone out and try to focus back on my book.The pizzas arrive twenty minutes later and we sit down at one of the tables on the terrace.“What time are people arriving tomorrow?” he asks me then with his mouth half full.“I don’t know, I guess around seven or eight? Might be sooner.”We eat our pizzas in peace after that, and then decide to watch a movie before going to bed. We’re all tired from sitting in the sound all d
The way she kisses is incredible; it’s deep and dirty, like she’s enjoying it, and it’s exactly what Matteo likes. It’s turning him on so much it’s almost ridiculous, and his brain suddenly thinks of her saying she’s never had sex in the sea. The thought excites him even more, so he tangles one of his hands in the back of her head, softly pulling at her roots. She moans, and unlike before, it’s an outright moan that points to pleasure. “Fuck, don’t do that.” She says into his mouth. He smiles then. “Why?” “It turns me on.” Her blunt answer makes the inside of his brain collapse, but she continues kissing him, grinding herself against him. Matteo could swear his knees just went weak, so he tries to compose himself. Suddenly, she pulls her face away and untangles her legs from his waist. “Shit.” Matteo turns his head to where she’s looking, and they see Isabella appearing from behind the bushes, focused on carrying three
Taormina, Sicily – July 20th 2020His father leaves the next day, saying that he has some business to take care of in New York with Paulo, but not without telling him to be in Taormina at the beginning of August.Matteo finds himself alone in the house when he wakes up, so he gets some coffee from the kitchen and goes to sit on the upper terrace overlooking the sea.His mind takes him back to what Valentina said about never being sad if she were to live at sea. He isn’t sad, but he’s definitely bored, so he texts Vinnie, Ariana, and Isabella, asking each of them what they’re doing.Vinnie’s text comes first.Vinnie: going to Sofia’s todayMatteo rolls his eyes and doesn’t even bother replying. He’s over the whole thing already.His phone vibrates again just as he lights his second cigarette.Ariana: bored in Milan