WARNING: THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS VIOLENCE
....
ELIAS
A part of me told me to stop, to just walk away, and prevent this, but....but...I didn't listen, and reminded myself of how shitty it was for him to play with my feelings, so I do the unthinkable, and something that was so foolish, cause I felt like it would hurt him, and crush his dreams of ever becoming my friend
"Be my new partner, but your old partner that you are abandoning would be his"
I told the devil, the same one who broke me, and made my life this miserable, to be my partner, and I knew it was the most stupidest thing I could ever do, but I couldn't help it, cause I wanted Lucas to feel pain, and know how it feels like to get your hopes up, only to crush it into pieces.
I wanted him to regret ever being undecisive about me, and as wicked as it might sound, I wanted to see him bleed, even though it meant I dance with that bastard, Eliot, the one I hated the most. So at first, I didn't regretted when I said that and walked away, but when Eliot that fool, chased after me, I realized my actions were pure shit!
"Thanks for making that British guy know his place"
Eliot, that bastard, said to me, and beamed happily immediately he finally caught up with me, but it made me so mad, cause I didn't wanted anything to do with him, after all he had done to me, and I thought his damn head would have told him that I only said I wanted to be his partner, just to piss off Lucas...
"He is not British guy, he has a name!"
I snapped back, and glared at Eliot right in the eyes in a rude way, hoping that he would just buzz off away from me, but hell no, he didn't let me be, and fucking didn't get the point into that damn useless head of it
"Why on earth are you angry I called him British, huh?"
He dared me, he really did by moving closer to me, and poked my forehead when he was close enough
"Stop it"
I whispered out coldly, and looked away from his face, cause if I didn't, the more I would remember everything, every single shitty thing, and how I could be so stupid to let my first kiss be with an asshole like him, an asshole that didn't even felt guilty for selling me off to those damn useless bullies, the asshole that didn't even felt guilty for putting me in this pathetic condition
Remembering all this, I tried to shift away from him, but he grabbed unto my hands, lifted them above my head, and moved closer to me...He was fucking assaulting me!
"Are you trying to get away from me, huh?"
He held my hands tightly to the wall with one of his hands, and used his other fucking one to hold unto my chin, in order to prevent me from looking away from him, and...and it made my eyes....it made my eyes teary, cause I hated it, I hated it so so much, I hated his violence, but I hated myself more for accepting to be his fucking partner, when Lucas was far far better than him, even though he didn't like me more than a friend, but this shut didn't care if I hated his guts, but what he wanted to say to my face
"Tell me, do you like that British?"
I heard his voice again, it is cold, deep, but not jealous, but mocking me, cause why on earth would he be ever jealous of me, when he didn't fucking care
"Let...me...go"
I looked into that fucker eyes, and tried to speak, to tell him how much I hated his guts, and would never forgive him for breaking me. I looked into his eyes, spat out, and tried to get away from him, so that I could tell him how much it wasn't his shitty business, if I liked a dog or a cat, but immediately he heard my voice, he scoff out, and it made my blood boil, and it wasn't because of the fact that he scoffed, but because of the fact that I was always this pathetic when I was around him.
Somehow, he always manages to bring out that helpless side of me, and I hated it, I hated it so fucking much
"You can't like him, Eli"
He shorten my name as if we were still fucking dating, and tells me, no...he commanded me to my teary angry red face, but I don't want to listen, so I tried to fight him again, but he doesn't let go, cause he was the devil himself, not me. I was rather an helpless slave to him.
"Why..."
The tears finally flew down my eyes, but I wasn't crying because I was sad, but because I hated him up to this point, and the tears were mixed with my rage
"Have you forgotten that you don't fucking own me anymore"
My voice grew louder, and I spat out to him, in hope he would finally let me go, and realize that I wasn't his freaking pet anymore, but instead...instead he does the opposite, and laughed out as he held tighter unto my hands that where above my head, and it made me groan in pain, cause it hurts, it hurts so so much. I could even barely feel any of them, but he still didn't cared in the slightest
"I know you are not my pet, but I just don't like it when your fucking little ass tries to find a replacement for me"
He sang out, it was outrageous, but he said it to my face either way, and poked me on my forehead again, and again
"So get that into here, okay"
He poked me harder, and smiled out, but I wasn't just staring at him, no... more tears left my eyes, and flew down my cheeks, and yet again, I hated it, I hated letting him feel satisfied with himself for making me feel useless again, I hated the fact that he was still alive, cause he didn't deserve it
"Oh, don't cry"
He used two of his damn finger, and wiped the tears away from my cheeks, even though I tried to look away from him, and stop him
"Stay still dear"
He commanded, and it made my spine shiver, but I don't obey him, so I shook my head the more, but in the end, I wish I didn't, cause immediately I did, he crashed his lips on mine, and it instantly made my body frozen as more tears left my eyes, but he licked them all up, when it flowed down to my lips
"Fu...fuck...off"
I tried to speak, to stop him, to yell out, but he bites my lower lip violently to tell me I was disobeying him, and kissed me with my blood, until I lacked of air. He only kissed me and did that, so that he could punish me, nothing else
"You fucking maniac!"
I wiped my lips, and tried to punch his face hard, when he finally freed me, but my hand failed me, made me lose balance, and fall to the ground, they failed me, cause he had held them above my head for far too long
Damnit!
I cried out when I landed on the hard ground after I missed his face, but felt much worst, so much worst when I heard him laugh at me again
"You really think you can be tough, and punch me, huh?"
He laughed out, I hated him more for that, but he didn't stop there, no he didn't....
He kicked my body, my stomach, and it hurts so much, and stinks me like insect bites, but I hated myself more cause I couldn't fight back, cause I was pathetic, helpless, I hated myself more because I was a guy, the guy whose life would forever be trash
I cried out as I thought to myself all this things, but he read my mind, and ruined me with his words
"Do you want to know the reason why I sold you off, huh?"
He sang out as he kicked my stomach some more, I wish I could just die, but I remained alive and listened to his shit...all of it
"I would tell you..."
He kicked me harder, and I felt as blood left my lips, but he doesn't still stop, why would he, when this is what he always loved
"It's because a weak guy like you doesn't fit to stand by my side"
"And it was embarrassing, so fucking embarrassing to walk with you, a guy who was the pet to bullies, so I sold your freaking ass off"
He finally confessed it, why he broke up with me, why he sold me off, he confessed every single shit, that a year ago I had wanted to know the reason, even though it was this pathetic, but now, now I don't feel much pain like how I would have felt, if he had said that a year ago, cause I don't love him anymore. To be frank, all I wanted was for him to kill me, so that he would be a murderer, my murderer, and perish in jail
"Kick me...ki...kick me some more"
I stammered out, but he heard me, and did so, he kicked me harder, and harder over and over again, but quickly stopped when he realized that was what I actually wanted
"I won't give it to you..."
I heard his fucking voice again, he whispered angrily immediately he stopped, and backed away
"I won't kill you!"
He yelled out at me this time, but I didn't wanted him to leave, to get away not after he has already made my body this messy with bruises and blood, so I used the last strength I could gather, and brought myself, my stomach back to his feet, but he kicks me away from himself, and turned around
"You're so damn pathetic!"
I heard his voice, it's faint, cause my vision is blurry, and I feel like I want to pass out, but I tried to prevent myself, cause I don't want to be found like a loser, the loser on the ground the next morning, and mocked because of it, so I placed my arm on my bloody lips, and bite myself, so that I don't pass out, and I didn't....
I watched him leave, he walked away from me, I watched him with my blurry teary eyes, and wounded heart
I HATE YOU ELIOT, FUCK YOU!
I swore out as I let go of my arm that was stained with my blood, and looked up at the dull night sky, that was like my dead tired heart
SOPHIE"Sooo, we are a thing now, right?"I looked at the face of my nerd lover, and asked him, even though we had literally spent a whole year together, and it was kinda dumb to still ask that, but still...still..I wanted to hear those words from him, and in the end, he fulfilled my desire in the most cheesiest way possible"We are not a thing, but a couple obviously!"He told me, and it made my heart flutter, cause I wanted to hear those words for so long, but I didn't tell him that, instead I rolled my eyes at him, and parted my lips."Quit being Mr. smart pants already"I said, but I had this really big smile on my face when I did, cause I loved him for being such a big nerd, and immediately he heard me speak, he kissed me...it was passionate, and I loved it how he always makes me feel so special with it...Sorry, I loved how he always makes US feel so specialI touched my stomach, and looked back at his face"Do you think they would accept our baby?"I looked at his eyes, and aske
Tell me every terrible things you ever did, and let me love you either way...LUCASI had a few more lectures that day, after little miss lover girl Sophie ran away from me, and seriously, I was so lonely all by myself, but I literally really won the award of being the world most lonely man ever, when I returned back to the room.The room that haunted me....the room that was filled with his memories everywhere, and the room....the fucking room that reminded me of every single thing about him, even though I was literally trying to forget about him...God"Elias..."I mumbled out his name for the first time in three days, and felt like my heart shattered again...well it did, and it was probably because I had broke my promise to never utter his name again, so that I could heal, but how on fucking earth was I suppose to live this way, when the entire room was originally his, and I always fucking imagine him next to me when I sleep, so after much thinking, I frustratedly packed up my bags,
SOPHIEI ran away from him, even though I knew his words were right, but I was still scared, and I really still wanted to completely figure it out, and there was no rush in figuring things out, were they?..I thought to myself, and tried to calm down, but in the messed up end, the more I tried to calm down, the more I deceived myself, and got more stressed so I resulted to drinking, and to getting myself drunk, so that I would just forget everything for a while, cause alcohol was the best remedy, but this pathetic side character ended up getting another bomb drop that same night....I was drunk, so drunk that I couldn't even walk properly, and knew that I might just literally die in the freezing night if I didn't return back to that hellhole room of mine (Yes, such shitty life I had)I thought to myself as I staggered back, even though my vision was blurry, and I couldn't see properly, or even think at all. To be honest, and after walking maybe in circles or something, all I knew was
LUCASI told him I loved him, but he didn't say it back, and left me either way, sad huh?...I sighed out, and played with my pen as I told Sophie about every shit that happened two days ago. Yes, two days had flew by, and am literally barely alive, and No, I wasn't mad that I didn't ended the friendship with Sophie, because of what had happened that day...Nah, I would be too dramatic if I ended our friendship because of what she said to meTo be honest, I kinda even understood why, and I guess it was because she was literally at her limits then, it was obvious something was wrong with her, but all I did was blabber out all my worries to her, without even caring if she was fine or not, and to be really plain honest, I kinda feel bad about it...about always focused on myself, cause it's really shitty"I don't blame either of you, rather I blame damn life, it's shitty, and so dramatic, that you can't even be able to control any fucking thing that happens, ugh!"I heard her voice, it bro
"Don't want to hide the truth, don't want to murder you, but with the beast inside, there's no where I can hide..."....ELIAS"Happy!"I yelled out to my inner demons immediately I closed the door, and left him, left him alone broken, and ruined.God, I was such a heartless being, and am so sorry Lucas, for every single pain I made you pass through, but...but this was for the best, wasn't it?...I closed my eyes, I was about to cry, but I stopped myself when I saw the fucking housemaster, he was looking at me, giving me a look that I had no clue of, but hated it, hated it so fucking much, that it made me instantly mad"I know you are fucking happy with all of this as well"I spat out, and glared at him, and I swear I could have just left like that...I wanted to cause it would be foolish enough to associate myself with the trash, after what just happened in the room, but before I could, he grabbed me by the wrist...How he, the old damn man miraculously manage to come out of his offic
"Don't want to hide the truth, don't want to murder you, but with the beast inside, there's no where I can hide..."....ELIAS"Happy!"I yelled out to my inner demons immediately I closed the door, and left him, left him alone broken, and ruined.God, I was such a heartless being, and am so sorry Lucas, for every single pain I made you pass through, but...but this was for the best, wasn't it?...I closed my eyes, I was about to cry, but I stopped myself when I saw the fucking housemaster, he was looking at me, giving me a look that I had no clue of, but hated it, hated it so fucking much, that it made me instantly mad"I know you are fucking happy with all of this as well"I spat out, and glared at him, and I swear I could have just left like that...I wanted to cause it would be foolish enough to associate myself with the trash, after what just happened in the room, but before I could, he grabbed me by the wrist...How he, the old damn man miraculously manage to come out of his offic