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Kabanata 31.3 - Despidida
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2024-10-29 19:42:56"Joke 'yon, beh?" Grace sarcastically said, she even rolled her eyes at me.
Natawa lalo ako sa reaction nila. Tumayo pa si Grace at nag walk out, sa kitchen yata pumunta. Wait, is she serious?
"Sa tingin mo matutuwa kami knowing na aalis ka?" si Iris. Mukhang seryoso ito at galit na nakatingin sa'kin.
Natahimik ako dahil doon. Kakaibang despidida party yata ang napuntahan ko. Magsasalita na sana ako nang maunahan ako ni Mads.
"Aalis siya? Saan ka pupunta?" inosenteng tanong nito.
Napa-face palm ako, binatukan naman siya ni Kendall at si Grasya na nag-walk out ay tumawa ng malakas, rinig na rinig siya sa buong penthouse.
"Kahit kailan, panira ka talaga!" inis na sabi ni Adel at binatukan ulit si Mads, binawian naman siya nito.
Nagsitayuan na sila doon at iniwan mag-isa si Madison. Hinubad ni Kendall ang suot nitong black dress at naiwan lang siya sa bikini suit niyang red. So pool party ang ganap namin tonight? Akala ko pa naman buong gabi ay magmumukmok lang sila.
"Bobo mo Madison, prank gone wrong tuloy!" reklamo niya.
Isa isa na silang naghubad sa harap ko, panay naka bikini suit sila. May mga bikini suit din naman akong dala in case na magkayayaan sa NY na magbeach o magswimming kaso tinatamad akong buksan ang maleta ko para kunin 'yon. Mukhang alam ni Adel ang nasa isip ko kaya may kinuha siyang paper bag at nang tingnan ko ang loob no'n, bumungad sa'kin ang tatlong pares ng swimsuit, bagong bili lang ang mga ito.
"Naks, ang yaman talaga ni Mareng Adel, pautang naman dyan!" pagbibiro ni Grace kaya natawa nalang kami.
Sa huli, yung lavender bikini suit ang sinuot ko. Nasa pool area pala nakalagay ang mga pagkain. May cake din doon, plain back ito na may nakasulat sa gitnang 'Para sa Pangarap. Goodluck, Direk!'. Kulay puti ang kulay nung sulat. Ang plain nung cake pero ang ganda! I took a picture of it.
Nag picture muna kami bago kumain para hindi mukhang bloated sa picture. Si Grace ay nagvivideo, for memories daw. Kaunti lang ang alak at hindi masyadong hard dahil may flight pa 'ko bukas, ayoko namang magka hang over.
Nag open forum kami at nag balik tanaw sa mga nangyari sa'min noon. Ang dami na pala naming pinagdaanan pero hindi ibig sabihin no'n ay malapit na kami sa finish line, lahat kami ay nagsisimula palang. I finally took my right path now, nagpapasalamat ako dahil isa sila sa mga sumuporta sa'kin, isa sila sa mga taong piniling manatili sa tabi ko noong mga panahong pati sarili kong kakayahan, pinagdudahan ko. I will forever treasure them and our friendship.
Hapon na nang sinundo ako ni Rio dito sa penthouse ni Adel. Iniwan ko ang kotse ko at ibinilin nalang sakanila na iuwi 'yon sa'min. I hugged them for the last time before entering Rio's car. Sa likod ako umupo, kasama si Rio. Ipinagdrive kami ng driver nila pero bago kami tumungo sa airport, dumaan muna kami sa condo ni Isaiah. Iniwan ko sila sa parking lot dahil ayoko namang isama sila habang nag-uusap kami ni Isaiah. I know he's here because I told him I'll talk to him here.
Pagkabukas ko ng pinto ay hinanap ko agad siya. Natagpuan ko siya doon sa may balkonahe, nakatanaw sa papalubog na araw hudyat ng pagtatapos.
"Hey.." bati ko nang makalapit sakaniya.
Tumabi ako rito at ginaya ang ginagawa niya, pareho lang kaming nakatanaw sa papalubong na araw. Ang ganda, nakakabighani, pero kaakibat no'n ay ang lungkot, lungkot dahil isa na namang araw ang nagtapos. Ang papalubog na araw ang hudyat ng pagtatapos, hindi lang ng araw na ito, kung hindi pati ang pagtatapos ng relasyon namin.
If there's one thing that I hate the most, it is saying goodbye. I don't like the idea of it but he deserves to know everything so here I am, beside him. I am here standing next to the man who chose to love me despite of my imperfections. The man I chose to love and let go at the same time.
"I am here to tell you that.. I already forgive you and I'm not mad at you anymore. I know you did that because you care about my feelings, I'm sorry if I didn't understand that before. Nagalit lang ako dahil ang dami ko nang problema tapos.. tapos yung taong nagbibigay lakas sa'kin para lumaban, pinaglihiman din ako. But don't worry, I am fine now." I stopped to breathe some air. Kakapusin yata ako ng hininga. Bumibigat na rin ang paghinga ko at may nagbabadya na ring luha sa mata ko ngunit pinili kong huwag pagbigyan ang mga ito.
"And.. I'm also here to say goodbye." tumigil ako sandali para tingnan ang reaction niya. He swallowed hard, hindi pa rin makatingin sa'kin habang ako ay unti-unti nang lumuluha, hindi ko na napigilan.
"I'm here to say goodbye, aalis na 'ko at.. at doon na sa ibang bansa magpapatuloy. Magkakalayo na tayo.. mag-iiba na yung mundong gagalawan natin kaya sana.. sana pagbigyan mo itong gusto kong mangyari. Ayokong dumepende ka sa'kin, g-gusto kong mamuhay ka sa kung paano mo gustong mamuhay. Ayokong hadlangan ka sa mga gusto mong gawin kaya mas makakabuti siguro kung.. kung maghiwalay na tayo." I wiped away my tears.
I've been thinking about it the past few days. I cannot leave knowing that I will leave him behind kaya bago sana ako umalis, gusto kong tapusin ang lahat sa amin. I don't want him to depend on me, alam ko ang mga kaya niyang gawin para sa'kin at natatakot ako roon. Sa relasyon namin, parating siya ang umiintindi. He even risked his own health just to take care of me. He turned down big projects just because of me! Nagsisimula palang siya at alam kong mas lalo siyang makikilala sa field na tinahak niya sakaling maghiwalay kami. He should focus more on his career, I want him to be successful, I want him to explore, 'yon ang gusto ko para sakaniya. I want him to explore the whole world without me. By that, we will both grow. We will both be successful on our own. And if one day we crossed paths again, I promise I will love and fight for him, whatever it caused.
"You hurt me, you know that?" he smiled at me painfully.
And that made me cry.. that made me hate myself because I hurt the person I love the most.
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Behind the Scene Kabanata 31.3 - Despidida
"Joke 'yon, beh?" Grace sarcastically said, she even rolled her eyes at me.Natawa lalo ako sa reaction nila. Tumayo pa si Grace at nag walk out, sa kitchen yata pumunta. Wait, is she serious?"Sa tingin mo matutuwa kami knowing na aalis ka?" si Iris. Mukhang seryoso ito at galit na nakatingin sa'kin.Natahimik ako dahil doon. Kakaibang despidida party yata ang napuntahan ko. Magsasalita na sana ako nang maunahan ako ni Mads."Aalis siya? Saan ka pupunta?" inosenteng tanong nito.Napa-face palm ako, binatukan naman siya ni Kendall at si Grasya na nag-walk out ay tumawa ng malakas, rinig na rinig siya sa buong penthouse.
Behind the Scene Kabanata 31.2 - Camera and Album
Muntik na 'kong masamid dahil sa sinabi niya. They doesn't know about what happened to us, wala rin akong balak sabihin sa kahit na kanino. As much as possible, I want to keep our problems. Baka kasi mas lalo lang lumaki kapag pinagsabi namin sa iba, mas maraming nakakaalam, mas magulo.Lumipas ang mga araw, pinayagan nang umuwi si Papa dahil maayos na ang lagay nito ngunit hindi muna siya pwedeng pumasok sa trabaho dahil kailangan niya pang magpahinga ng ilang araw. Isaiah is always sending me a message, tuloy tuloy pa rin siya sa pagpapaalala sa'kin sa mga dapat kong gawin araw-araw. Minsan nga nakakalimutan ko nang kumain pero dahil sa message niya, bigla kong naaalala. Tinupad niya naman yung pakiusap ko na huwag muna siyang magpakita sa'kin at sa ilang araw na 'yon, nakapag-isip isip na 'ko.I already booked a ticket, bukas ng gabi na ang flight namin papunta sa New York, sabay kami ni Ri
Behind the Scene Kabanata 31.1 - Envelope
I couldn't contain it, I just want to cry and cry all day pero pinigilan ko dahil ayokong makita niyang umiiyak ako. Ayokong makita niyang mahina ako ngayon."You knew yet you didn't even told me? How dare you, Isaiah!" my voice thundered.Agad na napalitan ng pagkabahala ang itsura niya. Lumapit ito sa akin para pakalmahin ako pero bawat pagdampi ng kamay niya sa balat ko, siya namang pag-iwas ko. Panay ang paghampas ko rito, hindi ko na naisip kung nasasaktan ba siya kasi ako, sobrang nasasaktan ako!I told him everything, wala akong nilihim sakaniya. Alam niya kung gaano ko kagustong malaman ang dahilan kung bakit ayaw sa'kin ng pamilya ko, alam niya kung gaano ako katakot makagawa ng pagkakamali dahil baka tuluyan na nila akong hindi tanggapin. Alam niya rin kung gaano ako
Behind the Scene Kabanata 30.2 - Betrayed
Nagpasya akong umalis sa hospital noong araw na 'yon, I drive all the way to Isaiah. Sigurado akong nasa condo lang siya. He's sick, mag-isa lang siya roon kaya walang nag-aalaga sakaniya. I felt bad becase of it, I should be the one to take care of him, ni hindi niya sinabing may sakit pala siya. The hell, Treia, you're out of your fucking mind for the past days!Dumaan ako sa fastfood restaurant at pharmacy para bumili ng makakain at ng gamot. I have spare key kaya madali kong nabuksan ang room niya. I saw him on the couch nakahiga ito at hindi pa nagpalit ng damit, mukhang kagagaling lang sa trabaho. He looks tired and cold, nakayakap siya sa sarili niya at nanginginig pa.My baby's sick.Ibinaba ko ang mga binili ko at agad na nagtungo sakaniya. I held his cheeks, mainit ito. Bahagyang dumilat ang mata niya, kasunod no'n ang paghaplos niya sa kamay kong nakahawak sa pi
Behind the Scene Kabanata 30.1 - Unstable
Kararating lang namin sa ospital, my father is in the ICU, fighting for his life. Sumabay nalang ako kay Isaiah patungo rito, hindi ko kasi alam kung kaya ko bang mag drive knowing that one of the important person in my life is in danger. Iniwan namin ang kotse ko roon, he promised to take care of that. Isaiah never leave my side, my mother is also here with us, nakaupo lang kami sa labas ng ICU habang hinihintay na matapos ang operasyon. Si Ate naman hinatid daw pauwi si bunso pauwi. No one told me what happened to Papa, parang iwas silang lahat sa'kin nang dumating ako, even my mother.Napatayo kami nang makarinig ng ingay, patungo sa'min si Tita at mukhang galit na galit. Huminto siya sa harap ko, akmang sasampalin na 'ko ngunit naiwan sa ere ang kamay niya at dinuro-duro nalang ako nang makita kung sinong nasa tabi ko."You.. this is all your fault!" her voice thundered.
