All the Feels

All the Feels

last updateLast Updated : 2022-04-01
By:  hchladybug1218  Completed
Language: English
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Lily Green, a senior at Ashmore High school, is invisible. With no friends and romance novels to read during study hall, her life to her is perfect. However, Lily soon finds herself joining the student tutoring program. When she is sick the day partners are assigned, Lily tutors the detention reject, Jeremy Davis. However, when Lily discovers Jeremy is suicidal, she will choose between living her life and saving his.

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Chapter 1: Help!

Books are oxygen for the literate. For me, there's no other way to breathe. Breathing comes naturally to living organisms. For a nerd with a perfect attendance record and zero friends, air fills my lungs, and words fill my head. I like filling my head with facts, opinions, and fanfiction. There's nothing better than reading Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings fanfics on a Friday night. Most teenage girls enjoy friends, sleepovers, and boyfriends. I'm not like them. I'm preparing for the future, for college, and for myself. I don't have time to watch the world pass me by. And that's how it goes when you're at the top of your class. Being on top is lonely, but someone must be the strongest, best, and brightest. The summer has one more lousy weekend. I'm not a fan of summer. My parents work, and we don't go on vacation. The last time we w

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39 Chapters

Chapter 1: Help!

Books are oxygen for the literate. For me, there's no other way to breathe. Breathing comes naturally to living organisms. For a nerd with a perfect attendance record and zero friends, air fills my lungs, and words fill my head. I like filling my head with facts, opinions, and fanfiction. There's nothing better than reading Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings fanfics on a Friday night. Most teenage girls enjoy friends, sleepovers, and boyfriends. I'm not like them. I'm preparing for the future, for college, and for myself. I don't have time to watch the world pass me by. And that's how it goes when you're at the top of your class. Being on top is lonely, but someone must be the strongest, best, and brightest. The summer has one more lousy weekend. I'm not a fan of summer. My parents work, and we don't go on vacation. The last time we w
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Chapter 2: Lending Library

I crumple up the suicide note. Whether fake or serious, I need to find out who 'J. D' is. This person, whoever they are, is a mystery. The note feels warm as if it were just placed within the Lending Library. It must be my mind playing tricks on me. It couldn't have just been placed within the library. And why are all the books missing today? I can usually count on two books being on the shelf. I placed The History of Pirates novel on the library's shelf and shut the doors. The crumpled-up note finds its way into my pool bag. "Lily, you came back early. And you're soaking wet. We need to get you a bathing suit. Want to get one later this weekend." Mother, sweet Mother, how I wish you knew I had no friends and that I'm a freak. But you don't. There's no point in mentioning the KAT trio and their bullying. If I can't handle them this year, how the hell will I handle being on my own when college rolls around the corner next fall?
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Chapter 3: The Big Tree

The first day of school is always the worst. All the assholes wait outside for the fresh 'meat' they will hit on. Braces are a superpower to keep them both away. Unfortunately, I'm not very pretty, so this first last day will be a cakewalk. "Lily, are you ready for your last-first day of school?" Mom says, coming into my room with a camera. "Jesus...woman! Can't you knock? I'm still in my bra?" I push my mom out of the door. I don't need any more embarrassing photos for the family scrapbook. My parents are dinosaurs with their libraries and photo albums. I love my kindle and praise it like a living deity. "Sorry, honey. I'm so excited and sad for you." "What are you sad about?" Crap, why did I ask? It's because I'm leaving. "You're leaving the nest in a year, and I'm sad. Who's going to hang out with me next year and watch Friday night soap operas?" Mom sobs like a baby. "Mom, it's okay. And I never watched those shows. I just
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Chapter 4: Glad I Did!

Lunch is a place of status and friends. I don't possess either of those things. My sacked lunch is in my bag, and I pull it out. As I open it, I see a handwritten note from my mother. Lily-kins,Don't forget to take the trash out when you get home. Love,Mom I throw the entire lunch away. Mother's bus photo is enough to make me skip eating altogether. Screw eating a sacked lunch, I want real food and by real food I mean go to a restaurant. I walk out of the school building unnoticed. No one seems to care that I've skipped school this morning. God only knows what I missed on the first day of Environmental Science and British Literature. Since I read all the
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Chapter 5: Brit Lit

I block my mother on all social media platforms. My Instagram account has been deleted, all thanks to Jeremy. He deleted it for me at Sammy's Sub Cafe.Our friendship lasted for a day. One day of friendship, and now I miss it. Have I really deprived myself of human contact for no reason? Oh well, I will do better in college. It's only a year of loneliness, and then I will graduate at the top of my class.I wish I had a reputation to protect. But it's been destroyed by my lack of fashion and having the world's most embarrassing mother.The only friend I remember having was Maria Arby from Ashmore elementary school. Our friendship lasted for two years, from the fifth to the sixth grade. When middle school started, she got her period before I did. Her social status and popul
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Chapter 6: Sick Day

The peer tutoring program is starting up today. I'll need to look my best to teach the freshmen about being a model citizen. Being alone on top is hard. It would be nice to have someone to share my glories with. If Maria Arby didn't become a woman and move away, maybe we'd still be friends.Sweat rises to my pours like water gushing its way toward a waterfall. Everything aches from my head down to my toenails. As I take a deep breath, I feel the weight of mucus moving around like a motorboat. I sound like the broken wheezy toy from Toy Story 2.Mom steps into the room. With one look of concern, she declares me sick. I never get sick. I take all my vitamins and exercise as my doctor instructs me to do—only people who are stressed and worried become sick.It sucks tha
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Chapter 7: Mr. Chaucer

My fever breaks as the last sweat trickles down my brow. Bubbles form around my pours like crystallized beads. My palms drip with the remaining sweat from my skin.I twist the cap off my water bottle. It's hard to grab the top of the bottle when my hands are wet from my fever breaking. My mother rips the bottle from my hands and opens it. The water hits my mouth, tongue, and throat. Its refreshing coolness heals the rest of me.Mom and I don't speak to one another. I'm still embarrassed by her despite my fleeting illness. I have every right to be mad at her. She took my senior year away from me. The KAT trio will tear me to shreds when I return."Why did you block me from your social media? I didn't do anything wrong, did I?"Mom does
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Chapter 8: Return to School

Returning to Ashmore high school after a day of being sick is not fun. I miss two days of school, and the amount of homework I have is the equivalent of filling out two or three college applications.I miss summer. I want to read my favorite novels beside the pool. Sure, summer is boring, and I usually long for it to be over with. But after the strange, terrible start to this school year, I am ready to graduate and be on my way."Lily, welcome back. It's not like you to be sick. Are you feeling better?" Mr. Cronkwright says.I hold my textbooks on my desk. The lead in my pencil is missing. My pencil case has Harry Potter glasses stitched in a pattern on its exterior. It's proof that I am a proud nerd."Yes. I am a lot better. I will t
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Chapter 9: The Zoo

Blood continues to drip down his sleeves. Do I pretend I never saw it? Do I say something?"You've been hurt. Let me get a few band-aids from my bag. Then, you can help yourself."I hand Jeremy the band-aids. I pull out my book and begin reading. It's none of my business unless he makes it my business. Jeremy doesn't strike me as the sort to cry out for help. Even if he did want my help, would I be able to give it to him?"Do you want to go to the zoo with me," Jeremy asks?"The zoo? Are you serious? What does that have to do with anything?""You seem like you need some fun. And I work there.""You want me to come and watch you work
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Chapter 10: Flirting

Senior year is looking up, and I finally have a friend. So, I guess Sir Gawain and the Green Knight won't have to battle it out to the death after all. Instead, perhaps they will sign a treaty and form an alliance.Our time at the zoo ends, and I have made it through the first inner wall of Jeremy Davis. After that, he will be a maze to walk through. There will be obstacles in my way and hoops to jump through. I only hope that Jeremy is a kind soul with an entire life ahead of him."Would you like to help me at the zoo next week?" Jeremy asks sheepishly, like asking his new friend to hang out is a crime."Sure. Sounds great. But in return, you will need to study hard and work when I tell you to. That tutoring program is about graduating, and I am going to get you there."
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