tell me a filipino joke

"Saya tanya, kamu yakin kita cuma terbawa suasana?" Enggaklah! Azalea menjerit dalam hati. Mana ada terbawa suasana yang sampai beronde-ronde, sialan. One-night stand biasanya bermula dengan alkohol. Setidaknya pada saat itu alkohol bisa menjadi alasan. Tapi tidak dengan kasus Azalea pagi ini. Azalea yakin semalam ia sadar se-sadar-sadarnya. Hanya kopi yang ia minum, bukannya whiskey. Selama 28 tahun hidup, Azalea tahu benar kalau kopi itu hanya mengandung caffeine bukan alkohol. Padahal kemarin terang-terangan Azalea menolak keras usaha ibunya yang ingin menjodohkan dirinya dengan Anselio. Azalea juga sudah mengatakannya di depan Anselio terang-terangan. Kenapa sekarang malah tidur bersama di ranjangnya?! "Informasi aja kalau kamu enggak ingat. Semalam saya enggak pakai pengaman. Kapan terakhir kali kamu datang bulan?" Duar! Azalea kehilangan pikirannya.

I was still holding moma in my hand, I was clouded with tears and was soaked in a pool of blood. Suddenly one man walked in and saw the pool of blood on the ground while I was crying. "W..what have you done?" I looked up to meet his gaze "n..no I didn't do anything" "You killed her!!!" "You evil child!!" He screamed and suddenly other men troop in "What!!!!? They all chorused to the occurrence, I stood trying to defend myself but they didn't believe and conspired to kill me " No, I am innocent" I cried, but they don't believe me and teamed up against me as they have always done. I was dragged out to the street like an animal to be killed "Leave me alone!" "Somebody help me..." I cried out "Evil child!!" "Witch!!" "Bastard" they all screamed at my face "No please, I am innocent I didn't kill her" i said "Go away, is that how you could repay someone who has to help you all through your life? You must pay for what you have done" he smirk "Somebody help me" I cried out. But to no avail, I was dragged on the ground like a nobody, I was bleeding, bruised and weak from the tortures, i lay helplessly waiting for my death. Just through the crowed I saw a ray of a light from a car then I mount up a small energy I ran away from the crowed but they followed me. As I screamed the accelerated car came in halt in front of me, but my vision was blurry and I could only see a glimpse of a man Find out what happened to Lisa when she wakes up in a house of a stranger

When Beautiful Bright Leah Monroe was faced with an arrangement that could change her life, she is forced to figure out if her family's legacy is more important than her heart. ***** After Leah Monroe lost her mother, her life turned upside down. The fate of France's most popular wine producers was in one hand and an engagement she couldn't get out of in the next. She was always in touch with her wild side; but also lived by the rules of her domineering father, thinking the actual love was off limits. That was until she met Xander Hayes, the new driver on her father's Vineyard. Despite his efforts to not fall for his boss' daughter, Xander couldn't hide his burning passion for her. So maybe he could have a chance at love..... That's if his secret and her father didn't ruin it.

Tahimik na naninirahan sa probensya si Alexa habang pinamamahalan niya ang kanilang negosy sa lungsod. Nakatira lamang siya sa isang simpleng bahay kasama ang kanyang dalawang kapatid. Isa lamang siyang simpleng babae at walang kaartihan sa kanyang sarili. Ibang iba sa kanyang kakambal na Si Alexis. Alexis are brat, she gets everything she wants. She always wear a sexy dress and clothes, and all man looking at her they like her.

Tidak menarik, tidak punya pengalaman percintaan, miskin; adalah tiga hal yang menggambarkan seorang Kanaya. Tidak punya pekerjaan tetap dan tidak mampu membayar kos membuat Kanaya berada dalam kondisi genting. Nasib Kanaya yang sudah pasrah dan hampir putus asa berubah drastis dalam hitungan jam karena seekor kucing. Semua itu terjadi karena dia bertemu dengan seorang pria tampan nan menyebalkan yang membutuhkan bantuan Kanaya untuk merawat majikannya yang manja dan berkaki empat… alias seekor kucing! Seekor kucing juga akhirnya membuat Kanaya dekat dengan seorang pattisier ganteng dan baik hati. Lalu bagaimanakah ritme hidup Kanaya setelah berbagai hal tak terduga terjadi dalam hidupnya? Apakah hidupnya masih tetap sesuram sebelum dia mengenal dua pria yang sangat bertolak belakang itu?

Miracle Addison is the only daughter of the well known great agents. She was 10 years old back then when Don Alejandro Salvador and his armed men attacked their safe house. Her parents died, Don Alejandro command Alfredo–(one of his armed man) to also kill Miracle but Alfredo didn't do it. Alfredo on the other hand adopted Miracle. He trained her well cause he know that someday, Miracle will find Don Alejandro to get revenge. When Miracle finally turned 21 her plan already started. She enter the University where Zack Salvador–(Grandchild of Don Alejandro Salvador) are currently studying. She needs to get Zack's attention and trust no matter what, in order to know the information about Don Alejandro. As she get closer to Zack, she didn't know that she's already falling. Will she forget her feelings towards the grandchild of an enemy and stick to the real plan or will she choose to love Zack instead and forget her anger?

A year ago, Aveline Young found a man with amnesia on the side of the road and brought him home. This man was strikingly handsome, with broad shoulders, long legs, and a face that could easily earn a fortune in modeling. Aveline felt an embarrassing flutter in her heart and on a whim, they quickly got married. However, once the man recovered his memory, his first action was to divorce her, claiming he needed to go back and take over his family's business. Aveline was stunned but accepted the divorce, thinking that money was more important and that she shouldn't be tied to one man when there were plenty of younger options available. On the day they finalized their divorce, Aveline shocked everyone in Cloudflare City with a bold statement in the divorce papers: "He’s no good, so I got bored." Post-divorce, Aveline was never short of attention from young, attractive men. At one social event, a friend inquired whether she would ever consider reconciling. Aveline scoffed. "The one who brings up getting back together is a dog!" Late one night, her phone rang. "Who's this?" "Woof!"

Ashton Carter is a man that every woman wants. Handsome️ Body️ Money ️ Fame️ Girls️ Billions️ Sexy️ Houses️ Cars️ Connection ️ He's life is perfect but he still feel empty Why? Read to find out......... ******************************* Arabella had her first heart broken on her teenage. She became the bet of the school popular boys 5 years later! Until they meet again... Will she forgive him? Will she still love him? Read to find out........

Jessica has been married to Zander for three years, but their marriage has gone from sweet to cold. Jessica decides to do something to save their love. However, she catches Zander cheating on her with his secretary, Serena. Heartbroken, she files for divorce. However, this invites even more violent retaliation. It turns out that Zander married her only for revenge. He cupped her chin and said coldly, "Your father owes me that." Completely disillusioned, Jessica finds her real father and recovers her original identity. It turns out that she's the billionaire mafia boss's daughter. Zander panics and begs Jessica to come back......

TRAVIS MONTIERO- Walang hinangad kung ‘di ang makaganti sa babaeng kinasusuklaman at sinisisi niya sa trahedyang nangyari sa kanyang nag-iisang kapatid. Katulad sa mga plano niya ay nakalapit siya kay Catherine. And his almost there,  upang maisakatuparan ang kanyang mga plano.  Ngunit paano kung siya rin mismo ang mahuhulog sa sarili niyang patibong?  Paano kung matutuklasan niya ang katotohanan sa likod na nangyaring aksidente sa kapatid niya?  Subalit paano kung huli na ang lahat para sa kanila ni Catherine? Hindi kasama sa plano niya ang mainlove… CATHERINE HUMPAY- Na love at first sight,  unang kita niya pa lang kay Travis ay naging malakas na ang pagtibok ng kanyang puso. Naging roller coaster ang mga pangyayari sa pagitan nila ng binata.  Naikasal siya sa binata na walang kahirap-hirap.  She's dream of na mala fairy tale ang kanilang pagsasama bilang mag-asawa. Ngunit kabaligtaran ang nangyayari.  Hanggang sa isang bagay ang kanyang naisip…