tell me a filipino joke

Jeffrey Karenzio adalah manusia yang kehadiran nya tidak pernah di harapkan. Dia lahir dari rahim seorang pelacur, sehingga tidak ada yang mau mengakuinya sebagai anak, sekalipun dengan bukti tes DNA. Hidup Jeffrey tidak berjalan mulus sesuai dengan apa yang dia rencanakan. Kebanyakan, dia pasrah menerima apapun yang sudah di takdirkan. Hingga suatu hari dia bertemu dengan gadis ceroboh menyusahkan yang kemudian memenuhi hari-hari nya. Rinji Kamila Averaya, dialah gadis itu. Sosok perempuan pekerja keras tetapi ceroboh ketika fokus nya teralihkan. Selain itu, dia juga gadis yang rumit tetapi selalu menikmati hari-hari yang dia jalani, sampai Jeffrey di buat penasaran. Suatu waktu, mereka memiliki kesempatan untuk mengutarakan beban satu sama lain. Dan semenjak itu, kedekatan mereka mulai tercipta. Mereka jadi sering berbagi tentang perasaan yang sebenarnya, tentang hidup yang susah, tentang hari-hari yang terasa berat, dan semua hal yang mengganggu di hati dan kepala. Karena sejatinya, mereka memang butuh telinga satu sama lain untuk mendengarkan apa yang ingin diutarakan.

Business tycoon Kieran Kingsley swears that he will never marry. That is, until one day, a young wife is forced upon him. From that day on, Mr. Kingsley's life takes on a new chapter!"Mr. Kieran, Ms. Valerie just wrecked the Chesters' home.""Is she happy yet?""No …""Get a few more of our men to help her out.""Mr. Kieran, Ms. Valerie got into a fight with someone. The other party has just been admitted into the hospital.""Is she happy yet?""No …"Kieran carries on with his work. "Let her continue."One day, Kieran finds out that Valerie Wood got herself into a fight again. "Valerie Wood, do you need me to teach you a lesson?""Honey, you were never like this before," Valerie whines.Kieran points at her tummy. "Were you pregnant before?"At seven months pregnant, Valerie still gets herself into a fight? She succeeds in scaring the other party off and gets Kieran so scared that he nearly loses his mind. But she is elated that she won without doing anything!

Tuwang-tuwa si Pauline matapos na malaman na nakapasa siya sa entrance exam ng isang kilalang pamantasan sa Maynila ngunit kaagad na napalitan 'yon ng lungkot nang ma-realize niya na hindi niya sigurado kung makakapag-aral nga talaga siya sa kolehiyo dahil sa hirap ng buhay nila. Tanging pagtatanim lang ng mga gulay at prutas ang hanap-buhay ng mga magulang niya na talaga naman na hindi sapat sa kanila lalo na lima silang magkakapatid. Gusto niya na makapagtapos ng pag-aaral para matulungan ang pamilya niya na makaahon sa hirap kaya hindi na niya pinakawalan pa ang pagkakataon na makapag-aral siya kahit alam niya na mahihirapan siya lalo na wala silang pera. Gagawa na lang siya ng paraan para matugunan ang pag-aaral niya. Naghanap kaagad siya ng puwedeng mapagtrabauhan para may pang-tuition siya ngunit hindi 'yon ang kanyang nahanap kundi nakilala niya ang isang guwapo at hot na football coach na si Matthew. Sinabi ni Pauline ang nais niya dito kaya inalok kaagad siya ni Matthew kung gusto niya na maging sugar daddy niya ito. He will give everything to her. Wala na siyang kailangan na problemahin pa. Hindi na niya kailangan na maghanap ng trabaho para may pang-tuition siya sa pag-aaral hanggang sa makatapos siya. All she needs to do is to say yes to him. Papayag kaya si Pauline na maging sugar daddy si Matthew? Is she going to refuse him to be his hot sugar daddy until she fulfill her dream—finishing her studies?

All I ever wanted was to get off this damned territory and escape my abusive family. On top of that, I would have done anything to be free from him, but his icy eyes aren’t the only thing that would hold me captive. Being in love with a high-ranked soldier is already tortuous enough, but as soon as I sign the contract he is offering me, I will be officially his possession. And officially screwed. ⚠️ TW: explicit and foul language, steamy and explicit sex scenes, abuse, violence, SA ⚠️

What happens when you find your mate only for him to tell you he wants his girlfriend. Feeling rejected hurts worse than death. So you run away to be free, but your heart is broken, and you can't stop crying. Will the hurting ever stop? Will it get better, or will you run again?

"I want you to be mine." Davon purrs into my ear while his hand snakes up to my neck. "I want to be yours, too..." "Good. Then I shall fuck you till you forget your own name, little flower." His hand tightens against my throat.

"Take Me Back, Love..."Breaking up with his long time boyfriend was the biggest mistake of her life. Samantha Reese was the dumbest woman in earth, when she came back after five years. She was hoping for another shot of love with her ex-boyfriend, Alvin. She was now ready to sacrifice everything just to win him back.Little did she know, the sweet and caring man she once loved was completely gone and turned into a cold-hearted man yet she keep loving him more. Will she be forgiven after what she had done? Or is he going to pay her back for breaking his heart?

Mia Anderson was known for her nonstop drinking addiction. With a strong will to make a life-changing diction that gave her the determination to be a successful businesswoman. With only small part-time jobs, Mia was able to earn a little money. With her mindset on a more Exclusive job, Mia signed up for an accounting position But unfortunately, with her terrifying background, which meant she has been rejected that opportunity evolved with her going back to her old habits that later turned into a terrifying experience she never thought would happen.

Warning: This book contains, violence, explicit and disturbing scenes- — My seemingly perfect marriage was torn apart on my third wedding anniversary. After getting married to Alpha Hades of the Silvermist pack, my fated mate and the man I vowed to love till eternity. I was met with thorns in my marital home. When I thought our formidable marriage would never sever, my husband's first love returned, and despite being his wife, I couldn't help but feel like a third wheel, caught between the two of them. Now, I want a divorce, but my husband is unyielding and refuses to let me go.

Upang matakasan ang isang arrange marriage, ginawa ni Zea ang lahat para lamang hindi maipakasal sa taong ni sa hinagap ay hindi niya nakilala at mas lalong hindi niya mahal. Nang magawang makatakas ay nag tungo siya sa hindi pamilyar na lugar na sa tingin niya ay hindi siya mahahanap ng kanyang lolo. Natagpuan niya ang isang napakalaking gate kung saan sa malayuan ay ang mala-haciendang tahanan. Dala ng kakuryosohan ay sinubukan niyang pumasok at lumibot sa lugar na pinagsisihan niya dahil sa lalaking walang habas na hinila siya papasok ng hacienda at basta na lamang siyang ginawang katulong. Dahil walang sapat na pera at bahay na matitirhan ay wala siyang magagawa kung hindi sapilitang tanggapin ang naging kapalaran. Ang dating magarang buhay niya ay magbabago. Ayos lang kung ang kapalit naman nito ay makatakas siya sa bagay na ayaw niya. Akala niya ay nagawa na niyang makatakas kahit pansamantala ngunit hindi naman niya inakala na yun pa pala ang maglalapit sa kanya sa isang bagay na pilit niyang iniiwasan.