tell me a filipino joke

In the shadows of Italy's underworld, one rule reigns: 'Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.' Alessandro Morano, a Mafia Godfather, walks a thin line between loyalty and deception. When Amelia Cooper enters his life, Alessandro must choose: Protect his empire or risk everything for love.

Nagpakasal si Celine ng wala sa tamang oras sa isang biyudong mayaman na may isang binatang anak na ang pangalan ay David Gonzalo kahit hindi niya ito mahal. Matapos ang kasal nilang dalawa ay dinala siya nito sa mansion kung saan nandoon ang anak nitong binata na hindi makapaniwala na ang daddy niya ay may bagong asawa na. Unang kita pa lang ni Celine kay David ay nasabi na niya sa sarili niya na gusto niya ito. Wala pa ngang isang linggo ay natagpuan na lang na wala nang buhay ang daddy ni David na pinakasalan nga niya. Galit na galit sa kanya si David sa nangyaring 'yon. Inaakusan siya nito na pumatay sa daddy niya ngunit tinatanggi naman niya 'yon. Pinapaalis na siya ni David sa mansion nila. Kahit mahal niya ito ay umalis siya sa mansion na 'yon. Makaraan ang ilang taon ay nagkita silang muli ni David. Bumaliktad ang takbo ng buhay nilang dalawa. Kung dati siya ay mahirap ngayon ay si David na ang naghihirap. Winaldas nito ang perang pinamana sa kanya ng daddy niya. Nawala ang lahat sa kanya. Gusto ni David na tulungan siya ni Celine. He knows that she became rich because of his dad's money. Tulungan kaya siya ni Celine? Mahal pa rin ni Celine si David ngunit sa tuwing makikita niya ito ay naalala niya ang masasakit na salitang binitawan nito sa kanya. Paano kung iparanas rin ni Celine ang naranasan dati sa kanya kahit may nararamdaman pa rin siya sa kanya?

Sa isang malupit na lugar kung saan walang puwang para sa kabiguan, dahil ang kabiguan ay nangangahulugan ng dugo at kamatayan. Simple lang ang hamon. Survive and escape the claws of your doom. The race against death's door begins once you enter the door...

I fucked the daughter of my best buddy. Now I have to safeguard her. Skye needs to learn how to swim in my infinity pool. That sounds like a great deal. And I know precisely what my malicious purpose is. Take her in the water with my hands on her curves. I know it's terrible, but she's as desperate as I am. Our affair will be our little secret. My former business partner, on the other hand, is out for vengeance. He's threatening to go public and reveal our identities. It'll wreck us both. So I'll be one step ahead of him. I'll protect her... even if it means marrying her.

Si William Styles, isang tipikal na cute na binatilyo ay namumuhay ng payapa at normal na buhay gaya ng iba hanggang sa isang insidente ang nagpasindak sa kanyang buong pagkatao. Sa hindi inaasahang pagbabagong ito sa kanyang buhay, nakahanap siya ng bagong tahanan, mga kaibigan, at isang usbong ng pag-ibig sa grupo ng mga taong lobo na may dilaw na mata. Pangil sa pangil at kuko sa kuko ay kung paano nila labanan ang kanilang mga kaaway, ang mga taong lobo na may pulang mata. Isang gabi, isang nakakatakot na pangyayari ang naganap. Umagos ang sariwang dugo sa bundok at nagkalat ang mga bangkay sa kagubatan. Magagawa ba nilang ipaghiganti at protektahan ang kanilang mga mahal sa buhay sa ilalim ng pulang buwan?

Fajar, pria yang memiliki perusahaan teknologi dihadapkan pada kenyataan jika dirinya memiliki kepribadian ganda. Mariska, kekasih Fajar tidak mengetahui apa yang terjadi pada dirinya, hanya satu orang yang mengetahuinya, Indira. Seringnya Fajar dan Indira bersama membuat mereka memiliki perasaan berbeda. Bukan hanya Fajar yang menyukai Indira, tapi 2 kepribadiannya yang lain juga menyukai Indira dibandingkan Mariska. Akankah Fajar sembuh dengan bantuan Indira? Bagaimana dengan percintaannya dengan Marissa? Siapa yang akan Fajar dan hatinya pilih?

He said I couldn’t do it, but he was wrong. An old professor at UCLA promised me that I would make nothing of myself, so I made sure I did. To the tune of billions. I’m only a little cocky about it. Yachts, parties, and one-night events pretty much spell out my life. And all of it works well until I run into a beauty I can’t get out of my head. But we’re keeping it friendly and casual until we aren’t. There’s just one problem. Her old man hates me. And for good reason. He was my UCLA professor. He’s dead set against me becoming anything important to his little girl, but the old man’s got it all backward. I’m not looking to make an example out of our passion or prove a point. This isn’t about hit it and quit it. His daughter is mine, and he might kick me out, but she’s letting me all the way in.

Your love made me a new person, and I felt as if I had wings. And, as every day goes by, I think more and more like myself again. And, every day, my heart burns for you. Such a fiery, consuming, profound passion happens once in life. Reece Harrow has finally met his match. He wants the gorgeous, sensual Amara Rafferty so badly, he'll do anything to have her... including taking her in after a car accident leaves her with short-term memory loss. And protecting her when he learns she's acquired a stalker. And harder still, keeping his hands off her until she can remember. Only, Reece hadn't counted on precious Amara making his job extremely difficult... Amara's world has been turned upside down. Her only constant is her sexy ‘fiancé’, Reece. And she wants him... badly and constantly. Only, all of a sudden, he's acting noble. But not for long. Because Amara's planning a seduction he'll never forget! Before long, Amara has Reece right where she wants him... in her bed and in her heart. If only Reece was the man Amara thought he was...

Kahit halos hindi na makatayo sa kalasingan ay agad na pumunta si Maya sa dance floor at doon ay parang wala sa sariling umindak sa tugtugin. Ito ang paborito nilang kanta ng ate niya. Napaluha siya, at napaupo sa sahig, hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin niya ito kayang kalimutan. Pakiramdam niya ay siya nalang ang nag iisang tao sa mundo. "Miss, are you okay?" boses ng isang lalaki Tumingala siya rito habang inaabot nito sa kanya ang isang panyo. "Ate Riza?" hilam sa luhang tawag niya rito.

When Emma Heather's marriage finally proven to have been worthless to her lying cheating ex runaway husband Zach, Heather found less will to live a appropriate life.Tobi Williams a young, rich, and heartbroken man who just found out his 7years relationship with the famous Anna Cole has been a lie, she's been sleeping with her so called manager and showed less remorse even when he found out.Nature accidentally brought Tobi and Emma together while both wasn't ready for what awaits them.Would two broken heart make I right?