pinoy humor jokes

#mutual contain 18+only "you should go to the other room" he said She looked at him in shock its there first night. He was nervous and open his mouth to say something. After a while, he said "your father makes a deal with me that if I marry you he will give me half of his property. My company is in loss and I don't want to marry you coz I am not interested in you, you are not my type.i feel disturbed when you are around me!" It is all he said to her. She got up from bed and a hot tear escape from eye and she left his room. She did not said a word to him. *************************** Roya knight-she is good. Age=22 educated and shy in nature. She is rich but she is also black in color. She never wear something so revealing. Simple and always smile. And she is tall, slim, perfect body, and her eyes is most attractive. She has every good thing but only lack of personality is her color. Johnson Robin - He is handsome. Every girl dream about him. He has well built body. He has blue eyes and white men. He is men of his word. Age=27. He run huge business and he has so many girlfriend. Content and /or trigger warning :This story contains mature sexual content. Strong language ahead, adult jokes also. Which may trigger for some readers. You have been warned

TAGALOG STORY She is an Education graduate, pero ayaw niyang magturo dahil maiksi lang ang pasensya niya. Ngunit kailangan niya ng stable job para maging proud sa kaniya ang mga magulang niya at hindi isipin ng mga ito na grumadwayt lang siya para tumambay. Pero paano kung alukin siya ng malaking halaga para maging yaya ng anak ng crush niya? Pagiging yaya lang ang pinasok niya pero bakit wife at mommy na agad ang tawag sa kaniya ng mag-ama?

Hindi siya kagandahan alam niya. Minsan tinatawag pa siyang mukhang weirdo pero wala siyang pakialam. Siguradong-sigurado siya na mapapasakanya ang gwapong-gwapong si Clyde del Espania dahil umaasa siya sa gayuma na nakasulat sa libro ng lola niya. Paano naman kung ang lahat nang panggagayuma niya ay nauudlot dahil sa kinaiinisang kambal nito na si Kyle del Espania? Alam ng lalaki na patay na patay siya sa kambal nito kaya't tinutulungan siya ni Kyle kung paano siya mapapansin at magugustuhan ni Clyde. May sariling layunin din kasi ang lalaki. Gusto nitong mabawi ang babaeng mahal nito na si Claire na siya ngayong fiancee ng kambal. Pero paano pa niya ipagpapatuloy ang usapan nila kung siya mismo ang parang nagagayuma sa kambal ng lalaking kinababaliwan niya dati? Paano kung si Kyle na pala ang itinitibok ng puso niya? Makukuha niya rin kaya ito sa gayuma kahit alam niyang mahal na mahal pa rin nito ang ex nitong si Claire?

Billionaire Michael Valdemore got everything he wants including women. No one will dare to say no to this hunk and handsome bachelor—until the accident changed his life—forever. Mrs. Valdemore took an action and hired a private nurse to look after him. He was so proud and arrogant to accept his mother’s will, and none of those nurses stay with him within 24 hours. But everything changes when he met Thalia Colantes. His pig headed private nurse. He showed her his nasty and lordly manners, but the woman didn't scare him. In fact, Thalia was the reason why he pursued to be able to walk again. She made him comprehend how lucky and grateful he was as she made him realized that living alone without her by his sides will be the end of the world. He fell in love with her witty, sense of humor and the beauty she had in and out. He thought everything was doing fine between the both of them, but all of sudden Thalia left him. But through his power and money he found her and make it up with her. They thought everything would be all right. But Thalia received an unregistered phone call from an unknown caller. Her twin sister, Vanesa was missing and Kristina Montalban—Michael’s ex–girlfriend and Victor Pangilinan— who was responsible of Michael’s car accident six months ago in Europe, were both responsible for her twin sister’s abduction. In order to save her twin sister Vanesa, she has to exchange herself. Victor wants revenge against Michael as for Kristina, she had no plan of letting them both escaped. The woman wants her die along with her sister, but all of sudden Michael and his friends, Leon Miguel and Enrique came to rescue them.

Anya loves weddings. Everything about it is just so...magical. When her brother Ansel decided to get engaged to the love of his life, she knew his wedding day would be perfect. And when the day came, no one was more overjoyed than Anya. There was only one obstacle that could ruin the seemingly perfect day. Connor Williams, an arrogant nightmare who may be after the bride and Anya needs to stop him no matter what! *This is a spinoff of My Boss is Clueless, but can be read as a standalone.*

Stacy seems like a lost soul that night. that is why she did something she never thought she could do in her life. She spent a night with a dancer she met at a gay bar. But what would happen if one day they met again by an unexpected chance? How will they treat each other?

Benhail Gunther, a billionaire who owned one of the biggest wineries in Texas had lived a normal life until he got the news that was going to change his life forever. Now, he needed to act fast, and produce an heir to own all his assets. Emery, a young woman who schlepped the weight of the world on her shoulders, lived with her ailing twin sister who was on the verge of losing her life. She was her only family and she had to do all she could to save her. - - When Emery met Benhail in the passageway that led to the exit of the clubhouse, she summoned the courage to approach him and ask what he wanted. If they had the same interest, maybe they could strike a deal. She offered him prices but was surprised when he offered her a ridiculous amount of money that could change her life forever. She knew well that the money didn't come just for him to get her pussy screwed, there was more to it. She had to pay a price to be in his life for a year. The deal was signed, and rules were broken. Benhail was holding back, he was afraid he'd love her too much and leave her broken. But Emery was willing to get hurt, she wanted to know more, submit to his every will and be more than what and who he wanted her to be if only he'd let her in.

Jade Parker is an average girl from Tennessee who is head over heels for Chris Bellamy AKA Mr honey brown eyes. Suddenly, he takes interest in her and they begin to date, but Jade finds out about a secret that shatters their relationship. In order to be happy again, she gets a rebound that takes a very drastic turn. After finally finding true love, she is faced with another problem-A stalker.

Sky Isabelle Honralez Bustamante, a beautiful and intelligent heiress. She is every woman’s envy. But behind that glamorous exterior is a very lonely princess who lived her life just to please her father. She even gave up her own dreams para lang makuha ang attention nito. And then one day, she fell from grace, hard. But Sky had enough. She got fed up fighting and decided to run away. With no destination in mind, she packed her bags and left everything behind. Miguel dela Cruz: komikero, matikas, at higit sa lahat, ubod nang gwapo. Actually, he could pass as a Calvin Klein/Armani model. Idagdag na rin natin na pang toothpaste commercial pa ang ngiti nito. Ang isang kagaya nito ay nababagay sa mga cover magazines at runway fashion shows. May mga pa-english-english pa kuno itong nalalaman. Ngunit sa likod nang magagandang katangiang tinataglay nito nagtatago ang misteryong bumabalot sa buo nitong pagkatao. The beautiful heiress and the handsome country bumpkin. One is trying to run away from her past while the other is being chased by his future. These two are in for a serious turmoil of emotions. Sky is trying to keep her distance. She builds up walls around her dahil alam niyang masasaktan lang siya and she doesn’t know if she can handle it. And Miguel, the man who’s a push and pull, but is always there to catch her when she feels like she’s falling. They are like magnets being drawn together, hanggang sa wala na silang takas. But just when everything is about to fall into place perfectly, saka naman sila naisipang paglaruan nang tadhana. Their past and future caught up to them at sa isang iglap nagbago ang lahat. Mahanap pa kaya nila ang daan pabalik sa isa’t isa?

She thought arranged marriages are just for Chinese. Pero nagkamali siya nang siya mismo ang ipinagkasundo ng sariling pamilya sa nag-iisang apong lalaki ng kaibigan ng Lolo niya. Ngunit hindi naging madali ang lahat dahil ang lalaking pakakasalan niya ay isang mayabang, arogante at masama ang ugali na walang ibang ginawa kundi inisin siya kapag nagtatagpo ang landas nila at ginagawa nito ang lahat ng paraan para lang mapaatras siya sa kasunduan. Will their hate for each other eventually turn into love or will the hate gets worst that may cause war between the two families?