pinoy humor jokes

(Sebastian Rocc's Story) Inakusahan si Neshara na itinulak niya ang ina ni Sebastian na nauwi sa pagka-comatose nito. Kinamuhian siya ng lalaki at nahuli na may kahalikang iba. She was pregnant and told him about it as her last resort. Subalit, pinagbantaan lamang siya ni Sebastian na kapag hindi niya pinalaglag ang bata ay sasakalin nito ang anak niya. Young, pregnant, and broken, she seeks comfort from her family. But to her dismay, her father kicked her out of the house, mercilessly. Wala siyang nagawa kundi umalis at palakihin mag-isa ang kanyang anak. Six years later, she’s already living in peace with her genius kid—Sevi. Matagal na niyang tanggap na sila na lang ni Sevi ang magkasama sa buhay at gusto niya ang ideyang iyon. Subalit, wala nga naman permanente sa mundo. Kung kailan tahimik na ang buhay niya, saka naman isa-isang nagsibalikan ang mga taong nanakit sa kanya. Sebastian who happened to be her boss, was asking about their child. Hated him a lot, Neshara Fil lied: she aborted the baby!

"Love me or hate me, either way I'm already on your mind. I win. You lose."***As the Alpha King of all werewolves and lycans, Aero needed to be fair to all. He ruled with an iron fist, a steady head and a balanced emotion. He was perfect in everything except for one. He had issues with the opposite sex. Since a child, he hated women. He never liked them and always avoided them. However, what if a woman suddenly materialized on his bed just as he was about to sleep? How could he avoid her then?***Genre: Werewolf Romance, Fantasy, Mystery, Adventure***Status: Complete***All Rights Reserved***JMFelic Books 2020***Official Published Book Cover

“Just...I have one question before this,” I pretend to not see his hurtful look, keeping my eyes on his chest, “...Please.” Would it change anything if I’m pregnant? I want to ask, I don’t know how. Taking a deep breath, I look up, just to catch him rolling his eyes with a sigh: “I don’t have time for your games, Scar.” Home? I laugh bitterly. We don’t have a home anymore, Sebastian. I built one for us, and you broke it.

Steal the CEO's Black Card or his cold heart? "Please... Please sir I'm begging you, I didn't steal the card. Please believe me" Belle hopelessly begged, tears welling her already messy face. "You deserve to be in prison...fraud!" the store manager exclaimed in pure disdain, glaring as he snickered. Belle was an orphan from a young age, struggling for her dream. A dream of becoming a great doctor. A dream she weaved together with her late parents. For several years, a tiny room in a dilapidated building served her humble home, living at the mercy of others. Most of the time she has empty pockets and an empty stomach. She endured the ridicule from wearing worn-out clothes and torn shoes for medical school. Life is a struggle for her but never did she think of stealing, especially the BLACK CARD of the famous and cold CEO, Ethan DelValle.

The story of a young woman named Melissa Brooks who has been through enough problems in her life to last her a lifetime. She applies for a job as a personal assistant but she was offered a job as nanny to the billionaire’s daughter instead. Javier Edwards was in desperate need of a nanny for his nine month old daughter, Lucy who has proven to be a handful. Fortunately for him Melissa happened to be there when his daughter was throwing one of her tantrums and she was able to calm her down when nobody else was able to. He made her an offer he knew she wouldn’t be able to refuse.What happens when they start having uncontrollable desires and feelings for each other? Will Javier be able to look past all her flaws and past?Trigger Warning: This story contains abuse.

Sinalo na yata ni Elizabeth ang lahat ng kamalasan sa mundo nang malaman na ‘matandang makunat’ pala ang papakasalan niya para maisalba ang kompanya ng taong nagpalaki sa kanya. Kaparehong rason kung bakit ipinagpalit siya ng kanyang boyfriend. Galit sa lahat at gustong maghiganti, niyaya ni Elizabeth ang taong nakabangga niya palabas—si Wulfric, na kunin ang kanyang virginity. Wulfric, the gray-eyed sexy beast gave her the experience she wouldn’t forget. Lalo na’t pinabaunan siya nito ng kambal sa kanyang sinapupunan. Secrets, betrayal…she doesn’t have a choice but to seek help from the father of her twins. But only to realize, that Wulf was the man she was running from. Hell, hindi matandang makunat ang pinakasalan niya!******* “A-Are you single, Sir?” Elizabeth asked in a shaky voice. He angled his head and his lips became firmer than it was.“Pop my virginity. I’m giving you my piece of hymen.”“You look fragile. Your eyes are sad.” “M-My boyfriend cheats on me.” Muling nagkumpol ang mga luha sa gilid ng kanyang mga mata. That was when Liz saw death in his ash-gray eyes. ——Wulf stared at the twins. “He is our daddy!” they said in unison. Naistatwa siya nang mabilis na tumakbo ang dalawa at yumakap sa kanyang mga binti. Labas ang gilagid na ngiting-ngiti ang batang babae. Nagningning ang mga mata nito nang tumingala sa kanya. “Daddy, we found you!”

The dominant, ruthless billionaire and a bold yet innocent girl, the opposite poles, are forced into a contract marriage of 1 year. There is only one mutual feeling between them i.e HATRED.What happens when these incompatible souls have to pretend to the outer world that they deeply love each other? Whether the love bloom or the hatred will take its toll? Whether they will realize that they are made for each other or just walk away after the contract ends? That's for you to find out :-) ---------Blurb--------- "If you want me to stay away from other men then you also have to stay away from other girls" the girl declares trying to set herself free from his iron grip. "Ok" she was a little taken aback by his agreement "But" the side of his lip twitched a bit "you have to fulfill all the duties of a wife" She gasps which catch his attention. The hand that was holding her throat moves up and his thumb starts stroking her lips, gently. "BE MINE" he avowed "Completely and dutifully" His words held power and firmness which tremble the girl lying under him, under his mercy. "Every night I want someone to f**k. If not other women then for the coming year, it is going to be you" there was no tint of humor in his voice "Shall we start from tonight? Wifey!" ---------------------------- (Story features Mature)

Alec - My life has been nothing but pain. I gave up not just looking for my mate but in general a long time ago. My pack, my friends, not even my children can bring me out of this endless nightmare. My wolf runs things. But when I see Crista's face, I see an end to my misery. I'll stay silent no more. She is the light, and I'll do anything to protect her. Crista - One night of terror has sent my peaceful life into turmoil. My pack is gone, and so are my parents. I was only able to save my little sisters. But when we're found unknowingly crossing the border into the Incubi Pack, it feels more like out of the frying pan and into the fire. The alpha of the Incubi Pack is known across the world as ruthless. The Moon Goddess must have a sense of humor as my wolf whimpers mate' as his yellow eyes meet mine. This book is a spinoff series from the Bloodmoon Series. Characters and events in this book may overlap with Beta's Surprise Mate. The Incubi Pack Series: Book 1 - Alpha of Nightmares Book 2 - The Hybrid Alpha Book 3 - Dream Mate Anthology Short Story - Chosen Mate Anthology Bonus Story - Sicilian Holiday Anthology Short Story - The Quiet Giant's Mate Book 4 - Beta's Innocent Mate

The Alpha's Girl will now contain Book 1 and Book 2, The Warrior's Woman.As a little girl, Olivia was convinced that supernatural creatures were real. After all, she had met a werewolf in her own backyard. Unfortunately, no one believed her. She lost all of her friends at school for being the weird girl, and her parents were convinced that she was insane. A decade of research and searching went by until she finally found him again. Her mate. The Alpha. When her family hears that she is talking about the existence of supernatural creatures again, they decide that enough is enough. Since going to doctors and therapists didn't work, they decided to send her away to the only place that could help her, and protect their other daughter from Olivia's instability and hallucinations. An asylum. Alpha Gabriel is livid and wants his mate back. When he finds out the love of his life was taken away, he prepares his army to do anything that it would take to get her back. Little does he know that the enemy to his kind runs the facility, feeding off of the patients and keeping them locked up for eternity.

Warning: Mature Content Ahead. Can’t decide what trope you want to read next? Well, look no further because Fractured has it all. If you're ready to dive into a world where passion meets peril, where dominance intertwines with desire, and where one fierce female leads the charge, then this book is for you. On her first day at university, Josie’s life takes a dramatic turn. Expecting nothing more than the typical college experience, she instead finds herself thrust into a realm of supernatural intrigue. Her guide into this new world is none other than her enigmatic and irresistibly attractive headmaster. As Josie navigates her new reality, she encounters five breathtakingly hot males, each with their own secrets and powers. These men are not just eye candy; they play pivotal roles in a dangerous game of power and attraction. Josie must learn to harness her strength, confront hidden enemies, and balance the intense chemistry with the dominant males who surround her. Her journey is one of self-discovery, resilience, and undeniable passion. This book is a thrilling blend of romance, suspense, and supernatural elements, perfect for readers who crave a story that's as hot as it is heart-pounding. Prepare for mature themes and explicit scenes that will leave you breathless. Join Josie as she embarks on an adventure that will challenge her, change her, and ignite a flame within her that burns brighter than she ever imagined. This story contains explicit group scenes including some bxb.