Semua Bab The Bound Collection: Bab 111 - Bab 120

I'd cried since Dan left. I couldn't hold on to anything without killing it. Anything that depended on me would be sorely let down. He was a cat. I shouldn't be crushed, but it was almost as painful as losing Joshua. In some ways, I was like a recovering addict. They're not supposed to be in romantic relationships until they've completed a year of sobriety, and then programs suggest trying to keep a house plant alive for a year before embarking on a pet. I had done it all. I wasn't an addict, but I'd endured months of extensive counseling-I'd followed the rules. First Joshua, now my cat. It just didn't make sense except I was toxic to anything dependent upon me. The beating on my door scared the crap out of me. I was hesitant to go to the door at almost midnight. I approached quietly to see if I could see who was on the porch before I turned on the light."Lissa, baby, open the door." Dan's voice rang out in the night, booming against the door. It dawned on me he was kicking the doo

Annie and I had become fast friends. She had a small group of girlfriends, but they were currently on different paths. She was career driven, focused in a way most women never are because they're more interested in husbands and babies. I admired her and Brett for that matter. The more time we spent with them, the more I saw the intricate way their lives were woven with Dan's and just how easily they were bringing me into that fold. There was no longer a day that went by that I didn't receive messages from Annie; she wasn't big on talking on the phone, which suited me just fine. We met for lunch when she was out near the University and coffee after work. Having a girlfriend who wanted nothing more than to be my friend was priceless. She was pulling for Dan and me just as much as I was.The last time we'd met for coffee was the day I knew Annie valued our friendship as much as I did. Dan had told me for months she was a private person. Her past had been daunting, and she didn't share

It hadn't taken long to figure out how to find an attorney. My cell phone started ringing day in and day out with calls from people wanting to take my case. Oddly, they all wanted to do it pro-bono, which I thought was strange. Initially, I had taken names and phone numbers and tried to make notes about my conversation with each, but until I was formally charged by the District Attorney, I wasn't making a commitment to anyone. I had no idea why anyone would even be willing to represent me, much less want to, but I continued my list just the same. I had thought charges would come faster than they had. The case was cut and dry, I had killed Joshua. There was no way around that, and no jury would see that any differently. But as I prepared for his funeral, I still hadn't heard from anyone at the police station. Matt remained adamant about my not attending the memorial service or the graveside, but I'd refused. I loved Joshua as much as everyone else had, my mistake didn't change that,

Dan and I met Annie and Brett at our favorite pizza place downtown. It was still fairly early in the evening, and families scurried around with their children. Brett and Dan regaled us with stories of their youth and college days that didn't seem to fit either of their personalities now. Every detail of Dan's past piqued my curiosity; I soaked it up like a sponge. As we approached the one-year mark, I wondered if he was as serious about the relationship as I was. We weren't getting any younger, and in my opinion, either he knew I was it, or I wasn't. Annie and I had discussed it at length, but she didn't have any more insight into his plans than I did. She'd badgered Brett trying to get the scoop, but he'd been close-lipped about the whole thing knowing Annie would tell me whatever he told her. Now, we both waited. We had compared time frames, hoping Dan might mimic Annie and Brett's, but that still put me a couple of months out for any confirmed commitment.I watched as Annie's att

Our pictures had been featured in the arts section of the local paper the next morning. I'd stayed with Dan, and he'd gone out to get two physical copies, the online version wasn't good enough. I sat in his kitchen drinking coffee in his shirt that was far too big for me when he'd come back. It was cute. I watched as he got out the scissors, cut out his favorite shot, and then pulled two simple black frames from the Wal-Mart bag at his feet. Walking into my office, I held one of those two frames in my hand prepared to put it on my desk. Just as I'd found a permanent home for the picture, Rob walked in. I hadn't seen him much since I'd turned him down and outwardly said I was seeing someone. There hadn't been any coffee or muffins, no last-minute lunches, or even hellos. I hadn't seen him, and he hadn't stopped by. Until now."Saw the paper. Glad you got to go." The way he said the words didn't make me believe his sincerity, but I refused to come off this high."Rob, it was...it jus