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All Chapters of A Blissful Grief: Chapter 11 - Chapter 20

39 Chapters

Kabanata 11

Hindi ko alam kung paano ako nakarating sa harap ng condominium building na tinitirhan namin... ng wala sa sarili. It's already 2:00 in the afternoon. I sat on the wooden chair which is located at the small playground in front of the condominium.    I sighed and look at the sky above. Malungkot ang langit na tila sumasalamin sa nararamdaman ko ngayon. Bilang sa daliri ang masasayang araw sa buhay ko at nangingibabaw ang lungkot.    True happiness comes from within but for me...it comes from ignorance. Iyan ang paniniwala ko dahil nagiging masaya lang ako sa mga bagay na nagiging tanga ako.  Does loving someone who doesn't care about your feelings is bliss or ignorance? Maybe you will judge me if I will say it's bliss. Well, loving him makes me happy.     My phone rang the reason for breaking my reverie. I immediately get it from my bag.    Daddy calling...
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Kabanata 12

Is avoiding him was a wise decision? I think yes if it's for my own good. Falling in love is inevitable in life but falling for someone without assurance is something we should take seriously.    “Paano ka nakakauwi at nakakapasok nang hindi nagpapahatid kay manong?” bungad na tanong ni kuya Lucky sa paggising ko.   It's been a month since I've been avoiding Rius. Umikot ang buhay ko mula sa school at bahay lang nitong mga nakaraang linggo. Kuya Lucky was also gone for almost one month for his work abroad. Inaasikaso niya ang business nila sa Canada. Maybe our driver told him about it.    “Nagta-taxi, Kuya,” sagot ko. Kabado.   “Come on, Fortunate. We both know that you are not good at commuting.”   “I knew already! I even went home alone, last time,” pagmamalaki ko.   Tumaas ang kilay niya. “Dahil doon lang ang alam at kaya mo. How about in
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Kabanata 13

“Fortunate!”   I heard him call my name but I didn't looked back. Looking back at him will only cause pain in my heart. Mas binilisan ko ang lakad hanggang sa napadpad ako sa bakanteng silid. I'm about to step inside when he grabbed my wrist.    “Where are you going?”   Hindi ako sumagot. I get away from his hold and stared at his face. Salubong ang makakapal niyang kilay habang mariing nakatitig sa akin.   “Babalik sa room namin. Ikaw...why are you here?” mahinang tanong ko.   His forehead wrinkled. “Hindi rito ang room niyo.”   “I don't wanna see your face! Iyon ba ang gusto mong marinig?” asik ko.   He sighed. “I'm sorry.”   Natahimik ako. Hindi ko pa rin maalis sa isip ang kahihiyang natamo kanina. Buti nalang hindi ako lumapit sa kaniya.   I don't know how to react in front o
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Kabanata 14

“Are you ready?”   I nodded. “Yeah. Let's go?”   Rius opened the car door for me. Ilang araw na ang nakalipas pagkatapos nang madamdaming pag-uusap namin. He's still courting me. Everyday, he shows how determined and serious he is with me. Na-kuwento ko kay Hope ang tungkol dito and she was genuinely happy for me.    “Sunduin kita mamaya,” aniya nang makarating na kami sa harap ng room namin.    Tumango ako. “Sige.”   He stared at me with his serious face. Bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko at bahagyang nailang sa paninitig niya.    “You can go now. Baka ma-late ka.”    Lumapit ako sa kaniya at hinalikan siya sa pisngi. Napahawak siya sa baywang ko para alalayan pero agad akong lumayo at matamis siyang nginitian.    “Tsk. Pasaway,” he murmured with his serious tone but can't suppress his smi
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Kabanata 15

I didn't tell Rius what happened yesterday. I don't want this to be the reason for him to leave his work just because of what Cassidy did. Sa restaurant siya nila Cassidy nagtatrabaho at alam kong aalis siya roon sa oras na malaman niya ang nangyari. Nilagyan ko nalang ng band aid ang mga sugat na natamo ko mula kay Cassidy.   Tumunog ang cellphone ko. I saw his name on the screen.   Rius: How's your day with Winslet?   Napangiti ako sa tanong niya. See? Even his messages brought happiness in my heart.    I giggled and changed his name into 'bebu' on my contacts.    Me: It was fun! I enjoyed a lot.   Bebu: Hmm... let's date tomorrow?    Kumalabog ang puso ko sa mensahe niya. Napakagat labi ako habang nagtitipa.    Me: Is it okay? Baka may work ka pa.    Bebu: It's
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Kabanata 16

What's with the biglaang gala, Kuya? Busy me sa activities tapos sinama niyo pa me here,” busangot na sabi ni Hope. We're here at the fancy restaurant. Kuya Lucky planned this earlier. Pumayag naman ako because it's sunday.  “Accountancy pa, brat,” si Healy.  She's also here with us... kuya Lucky's idea. Ito na raw ang oras para magkasundo kaming lahat. Hope sneered at her. “You're nangingialam. Shut up, okay?!” Healy shrugged her shoulders, hindi na pinatulan si Hope.  Kuya cleared his throat. “It's been a long time since we have a bonding moment. I miss my girls.” “Ang corny mo, Kuya,” si Hope. He hissed. “Shut up, brat. I'm trying to be sweet here. Ako muna ang boyfriend niyo ngayon. One at a time. Who wants to be my first girlfriend? Any volunteer?” No one answered. Nagkunwaring may kausap si Hope sa Cellphone while Healy yawned before leaning on the table and put her chin on her palms
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Kabanata 17

Everyone's dream is to have someone who will accept them as who they are. Dati pinapangarap ko lang na mapansin ni Rius pero ngayon he's my boyfriend officially. Umaapaw sa galak ang puso ko na pakiramdam ko'y babawiin din kalaunan. “Why ka sad? You're happy dapat kasi he's your boyfriend na,” Si Hope. Sinusuklay niya ang kaniyang buhok habang naglalakad kami sa academic oval ng UP para magpahangin. This place was surrounded with trees that will surely make us breath fresh air. Nililipad ng hangin ang mahabang buhok ko kaya pilit ko itong hinahawakan gamit ang isang kamay. I sighed. “Hindi ko lang mapigilan. Sa sobrang sarap sa pakiramdam feeling ko kasalanan nang makaramdam ng kasiyahan.”Tumigil siya sa paglalakad kaya gano'n din ako. Humarap siya sa akin nang nakasimangot. “You're overthinking again. Syempre we can't pigil the sadness na dumating because not all the time masaya. Just enjoy your masa
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Kabanata 18

Why don't you want to see me, Rius? Is that how mad you are? Isang pagkakamali palang ang nagawa ko pero hindi mo na agad ako mapatawad. Ganiyan ba kababaw ang pagmamahal mo para sa akin? Wala sa sariling nagpunta ako sa bahay nila pagkatapos nang nasaksihan ko. I'm sure he's not yet there in their house because he has something to do regarding to their project with Agatha. Mabuti nalang natandaan ko kung paano pumunta sa kanila.I knocked on the wooden door of their house. I saw Tito Luca when the door opened. Surprise was written all over his face. I smiled awkwardly. “Good afternoon po, Tito.”“Ikaw pala, hija! Pasok ka,” saad niya nang makabawi. Pumasok ako at umupo sa sofa.“Pasensya na po sa biglaang pagdating. I just missed the kids po.”“They're playing at our neighbor's house. Kauuwi lang din galing sa school. Anong pala ang gusto mong meryenda? Ipaghahanda kita.&rdqu
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Kabanata 19

Warning: This chapter contains violence. Reader discretion is advised.  “Kahit anong pilit niyong itago, mabubunyag at mabubunyag pa rin ang totoong kalagayan niya,” mariing bigkas ng isang boses. “If you shut your mouth, hindi niya malalaman...walang makakaalam.”  I heard murmurings and I forced my eyes to open. Puting kisame ang unang bumungad sa aking paningin. I looked around and saw mommy and Kuya Lucky whispering to each other as if they were afraid that someone might hear what they're saying. “K-Kuya...” Their eyes shifted at me. Agad na lumapit si Kuya sa tabi ko habang si mommy ay umupo sa gilid.  My chest feels heavy. I tried to get up but Kuya Lucky stopped me from moving. “Wag ka munang bumangon,” he said gently. “W-Why, Kuya?” “You need to rest.” Naguguluhang tumingin ako sa kanilang dalawa. What's going on? Something feels odd. “Mommy... Kuya, ano bang meron?
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Kabanata 20

Warning: This chapter contains violence. Reader discretion is advised. I woke up feeling exhausted and tired. Madilim na ang paligid. I couldn't see Leanna so I crawled into the ground to find her. Hindi pa man ako tuluyang nakakagalaw ay may narinig akong yabag at kaluskos. The air turned black all around me. I felt my knees tremble when his icy fingers gripped my arm in the darkness. “What have you done?” he whispered firmly. I tried pulling my arms from his hold. I'm scared but I didn't show it in front of... him. I am brave as everyone knows I am. “I-I will explain. Let me go first, please.” I said with a horrified expression. I maintain my posture even my knees can no longer make it.  I stared at his face. I could see that he's livid. His soft features are now covered with darkness. This was not him. “Shit! Will you please stop pretending. Hawak mo ang baril
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