Fifty-two"You're really here..." hinaplos ko ang mukha niya habang titig na titig na nakatingin sa kanya. Hinawakan niya ang kamay kong nasa pisngi niya at hinalikan ito kasabay ng paghila niya palapit sa akin upang yakapin akong muli."Love, I ain't dreaming right?" I asked staring at him intently. He kissed my forehead and wipe away my tears. "Uhm. Stop crying. I'm here, Love. Hindi kita iiwan," mahinahong turan niya. Sobrang lakas ng kabog ng puso ko na tila kakawala ito sa akin. Simula ng dumating siya ay hindi siya nag tanong sa akin, ngunit na sa tabi ko lang siya at inaalo ako sa tuwing makikita niya akong napapaiyak na lang. Natatakot ako na baka alam na niya... I can't bear it anymore. Ayokong dumagdag sa problema niya. I don't wanna stress him up more. "Oww. My Love looks like lost weight. Namiss mo ba ako ng sobra sobra kaya hindi ka makakain ng maayos? Nandito na ako," pagbibiro niya Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya, pinagmamasdang maigi ang mukha niya. His eyes are deep
Fifty-three"Chaster...." Something inside me sting. Napahawak ako ng mahigpit sa kanya. I feel like any seconds I'll break down. I started to breathe hard as if there's someone choking me. I closed my eyes intently as tears continously falling. I'm hardly breathing. Ramdam ko ang panginginig ng kamay ko at pagpawis nito. "You knew it all along and pretended that you don't. You knew it all along that my family is the reason why you're in crisis right now, but you remained silent and endure it all alone. Why didn't you tell me? Bakit hindi mo sinasabi sa akin na nahihirapan ka? Bakit iniinda mo mag isa?" tuloy tuloy na turan ko. Hindi siya umimik malamig ang tingin na ibinaling niya sa akin. Nakakapanlambot at nakakapanghina, I never imagined that he'll going to be treat me like this. It's harsh, yet painful. With his cold eyes and stare, I know... my nightmare is about to come. I'm afraid. "That's why you're acting like this. That's why you keep treating me like this. That's why..
Fifty-four"I will no longer calling you Tito, because you finally and officially became my Dad tonight. Thank you po for introducing us your family. Akala ko, hanggang sa dulo magtatago pa rin kami bilang isang sampid sa pamilya, pero ngayon po... maraming maraming salamat Daddy."Halos masuka ako dahil sa naririnig ko. It's so creepy and nerve-racking. So ewys. Hence, I think her drama was perfectly made. She's now getting a sympathy. Tahimik lang akong nakikinig waiting for my time to show them the real deal. "Kahit na minsan iniisip ko na hindi kami nababagay sa mundo niyo, pero hindi niyo po pinaramdam sa amin na iba kami. Mga pasko, birthdays, at ano mang okasyon na patago nating cine-celebrate dahil natatakot kayo na malaman ng iba ang lahat, hindi dahil kinakahiya niyo kami kundi dahil prinoprotektahan niyo kami. "I sneered. "Protect? Did I heard it right? So, while he's busy protecting you my mom is suffering secretly. What a piece of trashes," I bluntly said. "Protecting m
Fifty-fiveChapter 52"What are you trying to do? You're such a mess," pagalit na sabi niya. I started to tear up. My heart is badly in pain. For a second... akala ko... Titig na titig ako sa kanya habang pinagmamasdan ang hindi niya maipintang mukha. Niyakap niya ako ng mahigpit kasabay ng pagbaon ko ng mukha ko sa dibdib niya. I started to cry. "Stop crying. I'm here," bulong niya habang tinatapik ang likod ko. Why do I need to feel this way? It's so unfair."I'm tired," I said between my sobs.Mas humigpit ang yakap niya sa akin."I thought.. I'm fine. I thought.. I can forget everything.. I'm trying to live, just like before noong hindi ko pa siya nakikilala... but I couldn't, I don't think I can bear this pain."Tahimik lang siya habang yakap yakap ako ng mahigpit."You have me," bulong niya.Things that we promised to each other. Our future together. Our plan. Everything is a lie. And what pissed me more is that... I still love him. It's so unfair. Habang siya doing what he
Fifty-six3 years later"So what the freaking freak you're trying to say?" I hissed as I'm trying to calm myself. Hinilot ko ang aking sentido dahil biglang sumakit ito. This is freakingly stressing me out. "We're going to lost billions if this freakingly will go down the drain! I freakingly told you to stay focus on this project?! Are you freakingly that dumb to let this things happened?! Didn't I told you to settle this right? The freaking freak!" O freakingly geez! I intently closed my eyes as I heaved a deep sigh while massaging the bridge of my pointed nose."I'm sorry Miss Dashelle. I'll fix this-" "I'm sorry?! Are you nuts? Does your sorry will gonna fix these damn whole things? How and what the freaking freak you're going to do to fix this mess? What if Groupon Con will will freakingly release a statement before you could find their change?" I groaned in angerThinking about it is stressing me more. Like! O freakingly geez. This is a mess! Lots of investors already invest
Fifty-sevenHindi ko talaga alam ang takbo ng isip ni Ella, her own reason why she chose to stay with me instead staying with her family. Since that day when Dad introduced them, everything has changed. I'm still in the process of accepting them as a real one, because it's not easy. Ci is leaving today because of some circumstances. Nag usap na kami kanina, at this time, I guess, he's now on the plane. I'm gonna miss him for sure. Hindi niya sinabi sa akin kung kailan siya babakik, but for sure it'll take long. "Ella, I'm gonna eat outside. Join me," I said through my intercom. Tumayo ako at kinuha ang bag ko. I don't need to check myself na, kasi alam ko namang sobrang ganda ko pa rin. "Saan tayo kakain, ate?" tanong niya ng kakaming dalawa na lang, pero hindi ko na inabala pa na sagutin ang tanong niya hanggang sa napagod na lang din siyang magsalita. As soon as we arrived at the resto nag umpisa na naman siyang magsalita. "How did you find this place, ate? Ang tagal ko na rit
Fifty-eight"Welcome home Moon Dashelle!"Hindi pa man kami nakakababa sa eroplano ay halos isiksik ko na ang sarili ko sa kinauupuan ko ng mabasa ang malaking placard na hawak hawak ng mga pinsan ko sa labas nang sumilip ako sa salamin. Nakakuha agad sila ng atensyon. Napatampal na lang ako ng noo. "Ate okay ka lang-." Hindi na niya natuloy ang sasabihin niya ng mapatingin siya sa labas. Namilog ang mga mata niya at tila tuwang-tuwa sa kanyang nakikita. Nag umpisa ng magbabaan ang mga pasahero, while I just stay at my seat unbothered. Pansin ko si Ella na patingin tingin sa akin, nag iisip ata kung magsasalita siya o tatayo. "Tell the pilot that I'll coming back to NY, right now!" I said impatiently as I closed my eyes and massage my temple. Narinig ko lang ang mahina niyang tawa at naramdaman siyang tumayo sa tabi ko. Nanatili pa rin akong nakapikit, iniisip kung paano ako baba sa kabali ng kahihiyang ginagawa ng mga pinsan ko. "Ate, let's go. They're waiting," ani Ella na bah
Fifty-nineHindi ako iniwan ni Ci noong mga panahong pinaka kailangan ko nang tulong. Siya ang naging sandalan ko sa lahat, nagsilbing iyakan ko, takbuhan sa tuwing pakiramdam ko wala akong kakampi at kasama sa lahat ng lungkot at iyak ko. Hindi niya ako iniwan kahit na pinili ko siyang talikuran at iwan noon. He stayed by my side even though I'm hurting him continuously with my presence."Ci, aren't you busy?" basag ko sa katahimikan. Sinulyapan niya lang ako saglit bago muling tinuon ang atensyon sa daan. "I am, but I can buy time for you," he said without breaking off the sweet smile pasted on his face. Nilahad niya ang kamay niya sa akin, nakangiti ko naman itong tinanggap. I intertwined our fingers as I took a quick photo of it. "Can I post this?" He chuckled. I smiled when he kiss my hand. "Yes baby." Akala ko hindi ko na masasagip at mahahanap ang sarili ko, but I'm wrong, because of him I found myself again. Nang makarating ako sa company ay agad sumalubong sa akin an
EpilogueThings I didn't expect to happen. People I didn't expect that will come into my life, love I didn't expect to receive, and a woman I didn't expect that I will going to spend my whole life with. Unexpected things really do happen, na dati ay hindi ako naniniwala, pero simula ng dumating siya sa buhay ko lahat nagawa kong paniwalaan, lahat ng imposible ay naging posible para sa akin. I met her at the right time, and at the perfect place. "Dude, sino yang tinitingnan mo?" tanong ni Hans na lumapit sa akin at inabutan ako ng yosi. "Yung pinsan ni Clay," sagot ko ng hindi tinatanggal ang pagkakatingin sa kanya. I fell in love at first sight. I admit it. "Dude, punta ako sa bahay niyo mamaya," paalala ko kay Clay. "Sige dude."I got chance to finally meet her. Mas maganda pala siya sa malapitan. "Apakaarte," nakangising sabi ko habang nakatingin sa kanya. Umirap naman siya sa akin agad. "Apakaattitude."She makes face. I chuckled. She's cute. Finally, I got her attention.
Sixty-nineHave you ever dealt with something you can't handle? Dealing with it, until you realize something won't be the same again. Maybe that's how it really works, that you can't hold everything, that there are things that you need to let go for you to hold yourself from falling apart. "Ate, you're drinking again?" Ella asked as soon as she saw me at the veranda. "I'm not drinking, I'm just unwinding," I plainly answered as I drink in one shot the beer in can I'm holding. I heaved a deep sigh as I stared blankly at the sky above us. Even the sky is freakingly not on my side, there's no stars, even the moon is hiding from me. It's been a week since I decided to get back. As soon as the gallery finished, I immediately booked a flight. Wala na akong rason pa para mag stay sa Pilipinas. Yes, I do have my family there and friends, but I don't think it's enough for me to stay. "New York is still the same," I muttered to myself as I pursed my lips and closed my eyes intently when a
Sixty-eightI successfully park the car outside the Korean restaurant. Nauna akong lumabas sa kanya at naglakad papasok sa resto. I can't breathe with him by my side. His giving me feelings I tried to forget. Every time I stared at his eyes, akala ko okay na ako, but everything just turned upside down. My efforts just got wasted all of a sudden. Yes, I still like him... no, I still love him, but I freakingly know that we can't be together anymore. He already have Angel-eech. He turned his back at me again, while I'm still waiting for him to get me back. Sumuko na naman siya dahil lang sinabi ko sa kanya na everything is a mistake that night. Hindi ako maghahabol, dahil hindi iyon gawin ng magaganda. The foods I ordered just came, napatingin ako sa labas dahil hindi pa rin dumarating si Chaster. O freaking come on.Mariin kong naipikit ang mga mata ko. Tatayo na sana ako para puntahan siya ng bigla siyang pumasok. Pinanood ko siya habang nililibot ang mga mata niya sa kabuuan ng rest
Sixty-seven"Ate, problem," bungad agad ni Ella sa akin pagkapasok na pagkapasok niya sa office ko. By the expression of her face and on how she reacts, I might say that it's really a problem. I put down the folder I'm holding, and took off my Bone Prone Optical Glasses of Chrome Hearts as I raised a brow at her."What?"She heaved a deep sigh as she place the folder she's holding to my table. My brows immediately furrowed when I saw what's in the folder. "I contacted the owner of the photo-art the other day, remember the owner of 'Sweet Dull Memories' na kasali sa exhibit next week. I did reached her —" "So? What's the catch? I told you to settle those arts rights?" "She suddenly said that she doesn't want her work to be displayed." I stared at her, trying to process what she just said. "A collector just contacted me and saw our pamphlet to our website, and she want that certain photo-arts personally."I massage my temple out of frustration all of a sudden. O freaking come on,
Sixty-sixI've never been good of leaving things behind, because I'm always be the one who is being left behind, but despite of that I learned so many things, like finding out who's there for me, and never left when I needed someone the most. I learned to face everything without fear. I learned to forgive but I know I'll never forger everything. "Will you still keep someone that hurt you and cause you so much pain?" Pare-pareho nila akong nilingon ng magsalita ako"Oo naman," sagot agad ni Sunny na wala man lang pagdadalawang isip"No," firmed na sagot ni Vivi"Why not?" taas kilay na sagot ni Shantelle "What for?" simpeng sagot ni MilleThey have different point of views and thoughts. Maybe because, we have different experiences. We tend to still accept someone despite of hurting us, not because they're being martyr, but because they sitll love that someone. On the contrary, some people doesn't want to try it again, not because they're coward, but because they are too afraid to be
Sixty-five"Chaster and I, are dating," she happily announced at the middle of the dinner. Napuno ng tanungan ang hapag kainan habang ako ay patuloy pa ring kumakain. Ramdam ko ang tingin sa akin ng mga pinsan ko pero hindi ko na lang ito pinansin. "What? You and Kuya Chaster are dating?" hindi makapaniwalang tanong ni Ella. "Actually po, I didn't expect din po that he'll asked me out, kasi I'm still rooting him with Dashelle."I sneered. I couldn't stop myself to glare at her. Is she for real? O freaking come on. "Ya. Being hypocrite doesn't have cure," I mocked as I sip onto my wine. "If you really dating him, you freakingly don't need to drag my name out. Halatang nagpapabida ka na naman," dagdag ko. I don't know what's her deal. O freaking come on. So they're dating? Humigpit ang hawak ko sa kutsarang hawak ko. "I'm just saying lang naman," she fake a smile. My brows furrowed. "So? Do I need to care with your relationship?"What's wrong with this bitch? O geez. So she wante
Sixty-four Last day na namin ngayon, maagang natapos ang convention dahil magkakaroon ng party mamayang gabi. Ella and I just spend our free time sleeping. Chaster is so persistent, he really never failed to annoys me. Ugh. Nagising ako ng tumunog ang phone ko. Half-sleep, I answered the call. "What?" tamad na tamad na tanong ko. Halos hindi ko pa maibukas ang mata ko dahil sa antok. (I love you—) Mas mabilis pa kay flash na inend ko ang call ng marinig ko kung sino ang tumawag. Binato ko sa kung saan ang phone ko. Narinig ko itong tumunog pero hinayaan ko na lang ito.Another way to pester me. He really knows his ways. "Saan ka pupunta, Ate? Akala ko ba hindi ka a-attend sa party?" tanong ni Ella na busy pa rin sa pag aayos niya para sa party. She'll going to attend the party. "Do I need to ask permission or report to you everything I do?" I asked with my brow archedHumaba naman agad ang nguso niya. Kinuha niya ang coat niya na nakapatong sa kama niya at sinuot ito. We hav
Sixty-three"Ate," tawag pansin sa akin ni Ella ng dinantay ko ang ulo ko sa balikat niya. "I'm so sleepy. The presentation is so boring," I said yawning. My eyes unintentionally closed, because I freakingly am so sleepy. I woke up early in the morning just to hear some boring presentations? O freaking come on. "Just wake me up when it's done," tamad na tamad na turan ko. Kinawit ko ang braso ko sa braso niya para mas maging komportable ako sa paghilig sa kanya. Hindi naman na siya nagreklamo. "Just go back to your hotel room if you're just going to sleep here."Nagpantig ang tenga ko dahil sa narinig ko, at tila nawala ang pagkakaantok ko. Taas kilay kong tinignan ang nagsalita, it's Chaster na nakaupo sa likuran ko, straight face at emotionless lang ang tingin niya sa akin na tumagal ng ilang segundo bago siya nag iwas nang tingin at tinuon ang atensyon sa harapan. "Conceited pathetic idiotic moronic sleazy freaking creature," sambit ko. Muli niya akong nilingon, ngayon ay ma
Sixty-two "What do you want to talk about?" I asked with my brow furrowed as soon as I saw him sitting comfortably at the couch near the glass window of the restaurant. He smiled and wave his hand when he saw me. I just rolled my eyes. I placed my bag at the table and sat comfortably in front of him with my cross legs and arms. "Let’s eat first," he said instead answering my question. I flipped my hair beautifully with class. He started eating na as soon I sat down while me still busy showing my hates to him."Huwag mo kong masyadong titigan, baka mafall ka ulit sa akin." I chuckled sarcastically as I flipped my hair elegantly. "Excuse me? I'm not staring at you, it just happened that you're in front of me," I stated fiercely, baka isipin niya tinititigan ko talaga siya. "Fall my ass," I added. Doh? There's no hell way I do that. He chuckled as if he was so amaze on what I've said. "I'm just joking you don't need to be guilty." Agad nag salubong ang kilay ko dahil sa sinabi