Chapter 3

 “Sino ang kasama mo, kung ganoon?” inis na tanong ko.

Natigilan siya bago tumingin sa akin nang maayos. Damien looks so innocent that it breaks my heart whenever I remember that he cheated on me.

“She's Architect Tanya Renales. Inihatid ko lang sa bahay nila dahil lasing na lasing,” aniya.

I just nodded and acted as if I believe him. Hatid lang ba talaga, Damien?

“Walang nangyari sa inyo?”

“Wala, Sandra! Maniwala ka sa akin.”

I nodded at his lies. I am sure that he just did it with her, or with someone else. Dahil sa pag-uusap namin sa telepono kahapon, alam ko ang ginagawa niya!

“I believe you,” I lied.

He hugged me tight. Gumanti rin ako ng yakap sa kaniya. Mas mahigpit na para bang pakakawalan ko na siya.

“Sandra? Pwede ba akong manligaw?” tanong ni Damien.

“M-Manligaw? Sa akin?” tanong ko.

Bahagya siyang tumawa at saka tumango.

“Kung papayag ka?”

“Bakit?”

“Huh?”

“I mean, there are prettier girls out there. Bakit ako ang liligawan mo?Why would you... settle for someone like me?”

“Stop saying that, Sandra. Ikaw ang gusto ko,” he said.

Nagtagal ang maghapong iyon nang kami ang magkasama. We watched a movie inside his condo while cuddling and when lunch came, we just bought food and decided to just cook it in his condo unit.

“Love, pwedeng ipagluto mo ako ngayon? Gusto ko iyong adobo na may laurel.” Niyakap nya ako mula sa likod at hinalikan ang aking pisngi habang sinasabi iyon.

“Sige, maglalaro ka ba?” nakangiting tanong ko sa kaniya.

“No, I'll help you cook. I missed you so much,” he said excitedly.

Humalumbaba siya sa harap ko. Habang tinititigan ko siya ay mas lalo akong nasasaktan dahil mas lalo ko lamang naaalala iyon.

Realizing what he did and what I'll do after this day to correct ourselves makes me tremble and wanted to break down.

“So, what will I do?” he asked. Isinuot niya pa sa akin ang apron na kagaya ng sa kaniya para daw pareho kami.

Nakangiti kong ninamnam ang saya ng pag-aalaga niya sa akin. Hinding hindi ko makakalimutan ito.

His love for me is evident every time we're together. It made me question things more. If he really loves me this much, why is he cheating?

“Hmm, you can slice the ingredients,”  I said.

“Sure! Kapag kinasal tayo, kahit paghiwain mo pa ako ng sibuyas araw-araw,” nakangising aniya.

I laughed a bit at his joke. Pinabayaan ko lang siya sa ginagawa at nagpatuloy sa aking inaasikaso.

After lunch, we played video games and watched a movie like what he wanted to. Subalit nakatulog din kami nang mag-hapon na. Nagising na lang nang alas sais ng hapon para maghapunan.

“Saang bar kayo pupunta?” I asked him while we're eating.

Hindi ko alam kung guni-guni ko lang ba iyon pero nakita ko ang bakas ng gulat at kaba sa kaniyang mga mata.

“Ah... sa... Royal Nightclub lang.”

“Oh? Paano ka uuwi?”

“I won't drink much. Uuwi rin ako agad.”

“Sige, dito na lang kaya muna ako?” I asked him.

I saw the hint of shock in his eyes again before I saw him smile widely.

I really don't plan to stay here, but I just have to say it and hope that he'll believe me.

“Sure! Mas mabuti iyon, Love! Uuwi ako agad dahil narito ka, I promise,” nakangiting aniya.

I smiled at him and I nodded. He believed that I'll stay here and wait for him, but the truth is that I won't.

I will never wait for him ever again. I will never believe him anymore. I gave him chances that I forgot to love myself and see my worth.

When he left the condo, I looked at him as I looked back to our memories for the last time.

After thirty minutes, I tried calling Jeanne as I went down to the parking. Gladly, she answered it immediately.

“What? I'm asleep!” inis na sabi niya pagkasagot ng tawag.

“Get up, I'll pick you up,” I said neutrally.

“Why? Anong meron?”

“Let's go on a bar?” anyaya ko na parag wala akong problema at gusto lamang magparty.

“What the hell? Are you serious, Sandra? Bar sa ganitong oras?”

“Of course! Kailan ka ba nagpupunta sa bar? Sa umaga?” I sarcastically asked.

She groaned at it. “Why did you suddenly want to go to a bar? Is there a miracle or something?”

“I'll explain later. Magbihis ka na at papunta na ako,” I said as I opened my car.

Narinig ko pa siyang magmura bago ko ibaba ang tawag.

On my way there, I realized why I wasn't crying anymore. Why I'm not confronting him, why I'm here, bravely standing like it didn't hurt me.

It did hurt me a lot, he did it so many times that I was blinded with pain, and numbness covered my personality.

Nakakasawa din pala ang paulit-ulit na masaktan sa iisang dahilan.

I won’t lie, Damien was sweet. Iyong ipinararamdam niya sa iyo na mahal na mahal ka niya sa tuwing magkasama kayo. Sa tuwing hindi naman... hindi ko alam.

I've caught him cheating for about four times already. Pero hindi ko tinawag ang sarili kong tanga sa pagpapatawad ko sa kaniya.

Nang makarating ako sa apartment ni Jeanne ay bumusina na ako. Lumabas siya kaagad suot ang isang napaka sexy na dress.

Sadly, we are not going to party. We are going to catch a cheater.

“Ganyan ang suot mo? You should look sexier! Teka, kasama ba si Damien?” tanong niya.

“We're following him to the club,” I said.

Nalaglag ang panga niya sa sinabi ko at inihinarap niya ako sa kaniya. “What? Saan?”

“Sa Royal Club. Tara, gamitin natin ang kotse mo,” sabi ko at kinuha na ang susi niya para magmaneho.

“Wait, are you serious, Sandra?” tanong niya sa akin.

Bumuntonghininga ako at tinanguan siya. Humalukipkip siya at problemado akong hinarap.

“Sandra, gusto ko man na maghiwalay kayo, pero ayokong masaktan ka ng harap-harapan ng gagong iyon—” she said, but I cut her off.

“Even if he's not cheating tonight, hihiwalayan ko na siya,” asik ko.

“S-Sandra,” gulat niyang sambit.

I smiled and wiped my tears off.

“Ayaw ko na, Jeanne. Nakakasawa nang masaktan.”

Narinig ko ang pagbuntonghininga niya at saka siya tumango.

“I'm here for you, sasamahan kita. If that asshole did something wrong tonight, we're going to beat him,” she said before she went inside of the car.

I smiled and went inside to drive. It wasn't a long trip, and we reached there immediately.

I walked straight and confidently, almost like I'm ready for a battle. However, the bouncers didn't let me in.

“No hoodies and sweaters allowed, Ma'am,” pagpuna ng doormen sa suot ko.

“I told you, Sandra,” Jeanne Said.

I nodded. Tumabi ako sa gilid, sa may walang ilaw at sumunod sa akin si Jeanne.

“What are you going to wear? Damn it, Sandra,” aniya.

I held the tip of my sweater at akmang itataas iyon nang makita ko ang doorman na nakatingin sa akin.

“Hi, kindly look away, please?” I asked politely kaya kaagad umiwas ng tingin ang doorman.

“Are you seriously gonna—”

Naputol ang sasabihin niya nang maghubad ako. I am now wearing a bralette and a fitted jean with high heels.

I tied my sweater in my waist before I went to the doormen again.

“Reservation for Alexandria Aviana Alcantara,” I said.

A staff led us the way to a couch. I can see Damien with his friends from afar, malayong malayo sa aming table.

Naupo kami sa couch. Jeanne called for a waiter and ordered.

“Gin and tonic,” I said.

“Sa akin Jack Coke,” ani Jeanne. “Anong plano mo?” She asked me.

“I'll come near their table. You can dance. I'll just call you.”

“You're telling me to party while you're spying?”

“Yes, Jeanne.  Kung pareho tayong nakamasid ay mahahalata tayo. If you'll see something, tell me,” I said.

Napairap naman siya at saka tumango.

“Alright.”

Later on, the waiter served our drinks. I took it before I went to the table near Damien's. Magulo at maingay ang mga nagsasayawan sa gitna.

I started acting as if I am dancing, but honestly, I am listening to their conversation.

“Damien, I am telling you, that girl can fulfill your desires. Damn, kita mo ba? Napakaganda!”

“Pass ako pare, nahuli ako ng kapatid ng fiancee ko kagabi,” Damien said.

Napangisi ako at hindi na nagulat nang marinig na totoo nga ang nalaman ko.

“What? Damn, dapat kasi maingat ka!”

“Stop tolerating him. Engaged ka na pala, bakit naghahanap ka pa?” a man said. As far as I know, he is Chester Del Fuego.

“Don't get me wrong. I love my fiancee, it's just that...”

Bahagya akong tumigil sa pagsasayaw. I want to hear his reasons. But whatever his reasons are, cheating is still cheating.

“Damn, bakit ba ako nag-eexplain sa inyo? I'll just go to the bathroom,” rinig kong sabi ni Damien.

I continued dancing as I texted Jeanne to go near the exit.

Habang patuloy na nagsasayaw at nagmamasid ay may nakita ako mula sa malayo. My brows furrowed when I realized that it was my sister. She was walking so fast. Parang may taong hinahabol.

Napapikit ako ng mariin nang sumakit ang ulo dahil sa dami ng iniisip at sa ingay ng mga tao. The crowd was intoxicating , and I have to get out of it. Kailanman ay hindi nakatulong ang ingay at party sa problema ko.

A few minutes later, I realized that Damien wasn’t back yet. I opened my phone and saw Jeanne's text!

Jeanne:

Sandra, Damien is with someone. May kahalikan siya rito sa may tapat ng banyo.

My lips parted as I felt my heart thumped. I knew it. I definitely knew it!

Ang kapal ng mukha niya. He thinks that I'm at his condo, and then he said that he loves me. Pero ngayon, narito siya sa isang bar at nakikipaghalikan sa ibang babae!

Ako:

I'll go to him. Text na lang ulit kita.

Instead of going to where Jeanne said, I went outside the parking lot and looked for his car. Alam kong hindi niyan kakayanin na halik lang. Malibog yan eh!

Sumandal ako sa sasakyan niya, iniisip kung paano kaya kung magmakaawa akong wag na siyang mambabae at makuntento na lang sakin?

What if I beg him to marry me already and stop these shits?  Besides, he said he loves me!

But I won't. I will never beg for his love anymore.

If love is self-destruction, then why would I choose it? Love is never meant for that way.

Nanginig ang kalamnan ko nang makita silang papalapit. The girl kissed him again habang nakasubsob siya kay Damien. I have a blurry vision, and I can't see the girl properly.

“Sa condo mo na lang tayo,” the girl said.

“Naroon si Sandra,”

“I can book a hotel room for the two of you,” I said while smiling.

Gulat silang tumingin sa akin. Bahagya pang napaatras si Damien.

Binitawan niya ang babae at saka lumapit sa akin. But before he could come near me, I slapped him already.

Nilingon ko ang babaeng kasama niya na gulat ring nakatingin sa akin. My jaw dropped as I realized who she is.

“A- Ate,” she called me.

“What the fuck? You traitors!” I shouted at them.

Itinulak ko si Damien gamit ang nanginginig kong mga kamay. Halos hindi ko na kaya ang nangyayari. Akala ko ay sanay na ako, akala ko ay hindi na ako nasasaktan at namanhid na ako.

“Love, please listen to me.”

“Fuck you, Damien! Fuck you! Ang makita kitang nambababae nang paulit-ulit ay kinakaya ko pa! Pero ang makita kitang kasama ang kapatid ko? Sa tingin mo ba talaga ay papakasalan pa kita?”