KABANATA 1

TEN YEARS AGO

It was a typical day when I decided to come out for a jog. Crystal was in the backyard—watering the plants when I stepped out of the door.

"I’ll jog lang muna. Gusto mo ba ng pandesal?" tanong ko at huminto sa harap niya.

Pandesal is a bread that we usually eat every morning. It's already five-thirty AM, sumisikat na rin ang araw. She looked and nodded at me.

"Just five pieces. Nakapag luto na rin ako ng fried rice, bacon, and hotdogs for breakfast. Uuwi sila Mommy at Daddy ngayong umaga kaya dapat na maraming pagkain mamaya," she said as she watered her plants.

"Copy!" I answered and adjusted my earphone habang naghahanap ng music na ipapatugtog. I locked the gate and bid goodbye to my sister.

"Dustin! Dito!"

My head automatically turns to the woman living a few blocks away from our house. They are probably new in this neighborhood.

The woman is in her forties, and she's petite. Her hair is short, and she has chinky eyes like mine.

I am familiar with our neighbors since we moved to Cavite during grade school, and I know that these people are new to me. My eyes narrowed at the man who was holding a big box. One thing I noticed was that he's freaking tall. He has broad shoulders. His biceps showed as he lifted that huge box he carried inside the house. He didn't even notice me.

"Oh, hi!" the woman showed herself again at the front door—greeted me with a smile. Now that she saw me, I decided to approach her habang pinause ko ang music sa aking cellphone.

"Hello! Nakatira po ako doon kasama ang parents ko and sister ko," I pointed at our house, where my sister was already out—carrying the black trash bag. Sinundan niya iyon ng tingin at tumango. This woman has a friendly aura. Every time she smiles, it reflects in her eyes.

"Well, nice to meet you! I'm Wendy," She chuckled and extended her hand for a handshake.

"Cassiedy, Maam," I smiled and shook hands with her.

"Oh, wait! Dustin! Pasuyo naman ako ng biko, please?" She shouted while peeking inside her house and looking back at me again. "I'll give you some. It's my specialty," She giggled.

Paborito nang Mommy ang biko I know she would get excited to have that for a snack.

"This?"

My eyes slowly darted at him. Oh, boy! He's a good-looking guy. But unfortunately, he looks mature. I bet he's years older than me. I am just sixteen!

Dustin's eyes were dark brown, refined nose, thick eyebrows, prominent jaw, thin lips, and stubble.

I immediately looked down at the plastic tub he was holding nang maramdaman kong titingin na siya sa akin.

"Yes, I'll give this to Cassiedy. Kapitbahay ko. Cassiedy, this is my nephew, Dustin," said Miss Wendy—taking the tub from his nephew.

I smiled when she introduced me to him. He didn't say anything but gave me a forced smile and turned his back on me. I was a bit shocked. I didn't expect that he would be such a snobbish person. Akala ko pa naman mabait.

Hindi nga yata napansin ni Miss Wendy iyong behavior ng pamangkin niya. She handed me the tub.

"Here."

"Thank you po! I'll give you some of my baked cookies next time. Specialty ko po yon." I giggled.

"Oh, sure!" she chuckled.

Instead of going for a jog, nagpasya akong bumalik para iiwan iyong plastic tub sa lamesa.

Crystal's brows furrowed when she saw the tub in my hand.

"We have a new neighbor, binigay niya sa ‘kin ‘to. I'll leave this on the table."

Umalis ako sa bahay at nag-jogging sa buong village. I did it for forty minutes bago bumili ng pandesal at umuwi.

My eyes narrowed when I saw Crystal with our neighbor’s nephew—Dustin giving her a food tray. Natagpuan ko ‘yong sarili ko na tumakbo na rin palapit sa kanila.

"No problem," Dustin's voice was rough and deep.

It gives me a shiver down my spine hearing his voice. I don't know what's going on with me and why this guy had this effect on me.

He was looking intently at my sister—intimidating her. But Crystal couldn't look at him directly as she was freaking nervous, and it was obvious!

My sister noticed me. Her face lit up as if I had saved her from an awkward situation. She raised her hand a bit, holding the food tray to show it.

"Her aunt gave this to us again," sabi nito at itinaas ang food tray para ipakita sa akin.

I tried to look at Dustin para bigyan siya ng pala-kaibigan na ngiti, but he just gave a timid smile and then looked back at my sister.

What the hell is wrong with this guy?

"Oh, thank you!" I replied.

He just nodded and glanced at me.

"I got to go."

Tumango lang kami, and when Dustin turned his back on us. My sister held my hand and squeezed it tightly.

"What?" I mouthed.

Hinila niya ako papasok sa bahay at nagsimulang magtititili.

"What the—Crystal!" My eyes widened in shock as I covered her mouth.

"Huy, ano ka ba! Marinig ka niya!"

She smiled, and her face was a bit red nang pakawalan ko. She walked towards our kitchen to put the food tray on the table.

"He was freaking handsome! That's my ideal guy! He's so tall... so, manly! His voice... Cassy! Narinig mo ba kung gaano kalalim ang boses niya? It's like he's a radio DJ!" Crystal couldn't stop praising the guy living with his aunt.

She's shy and a silent type of person, but she is very vocal with her feelings when I am with her. I am not only her sister but her best friend—a partner in crime. We share our secrets too.

"I can see it. Paulit-ulit mo nang pinupuri, and you're blushing while talking to him kanina," I chuckled.

That’s how it started. I never imagined I would make friends with him. Not just friends but best friends! I really thought that Dustin would be like that with my twin sister—Crystal. The way he looks at her, he seems interested, and it's different from how he approaches me. He's cold and distant. Crystal is also into him. It's just that she's too shy to tell him.

Bumibisita si Dustin sa tita niya every summer. Tapos lagi siyang inuutusan ni Tita Wendy na dalhan lagi kami ng pagkain. At dahil lagi akong nasa living area, ako lagi ang nagbubukas ng pinto para sa kanya. Her aunt is really a kind and generous person, so I got used to her always handing out snacks for our family.

Until one day, my parents and sister went out to attend a charity event, and I was left at home because I was sick. I got the flu and fever. Dustin saved me when I fainted when I opened the door for him. Hindi ako iniwan ni Dustin at ni Tita Wendy no’ng araw na ‘yon. They took care of me until my family arrived. My mom and dad are grateful for their help.

After that, Dustin and I started to talk with each other every summer. Sometimes, he would visit on weekends to play basketball with his new friends. Until I felt something for him, na-develop dahil kapag nandito siya sa Cavite ay nagkakasama kaming dalawa. I started to like him more than a friend. It's getting deeper every time we're together. I felt a little guilty for making close friends with Dustin kasi alam kong gusto siya ng kapatid ko.

"Try to talk to Dustin. I'm gonna tell him you'll come with me. Stop being silent the whole time he's around."

I don't know about Dustin's feelings about my sister. He didn't mention anything to me. Close na nga kami ni Tita Wendy at Dustin. Ganoon din si Mommy sa kanila. Tuwing sabado nasa kila Tita Wendy ako.

"Nahihiya ako makipag-usap, Cassy. I'm trying! My mind keeps saying so many things, but my mouth can't cooperate with what my brain tells me."

I sighed while she looked at me.

"Don't tell him I like him. That's so embarrassing."

Tumango na lang ako sa kanya. Crystal reminds me of it again. I am exerting effort to make my sister get close to him. I admit I like Dustin, but I never told anyone about it since my sister does like him. Crystal is fragile. May sakit siya.

She had heart disease last year. The Doctors reminded us to take good extra care of her and avoid her getting physically, emotionally, and mentally hurt.

Nang sumunod na araw ay pumunta kami ni Crystal sa bahay nila Tita Wendy. Talagang sinama ko na siya. Balak kasi namin ni Dustin maglaro ng video games. Ito na nga ang nagbukas ng pinto para sa amin. I have witnessed how Dustin and my sister looked at each other. There's a spark in their eyes which I know they only need one push to admit their feelings for each other. Dustin is just in denial, while my sister is too shy.

I felt a pang in my chest, which I ignored. I have no time for this, and it's just a puppy love I have for Dustin. I believe it will die down as time goes by. There are a lot of guys out there—someone who will look at me the way Dustin looks at my sister.

Hindi ko nga ma-gets kasi mukha namang babaero si Dustin pero nahihiya sa kapatid ko.

That's the first time I witnessed how my sister exerted her effort to talk to Dustin. She's an introvert, so showing her feelings and talking to others makes her uncomfortable. Hanggang sa nasundan iyong pagpunta naming dalawa doon at na-realize ko na lang din isang araw na si Crystal na lang mag-isa ang nagpupunta kila Tita Wendy.

"Nandoon siya kila Wendy kasi sabi ni Dustin pumunta siya," Mom said.

I nodded. I didn't know about that.

They didn't tell me. Tingin ko ay hindi na ako kailangan ni Crystal. She can come to Ms. Wendy's house whenever she wants, and she has a conversation with Dustin without me knowing. Medyo nalungkot ako pero tingin ko ay okay na rin iyon. I want to make my sister happy.

I am done with secretly loving Dustin. I started supporting their friendship too. Mas close si Dustin kaysa sa akin pero okay lang iyon. I will still be with them whenever they want to play video games or if kakain kaming tatlo sa labas. Siguro hindi palagi pero and that is to prevent myself from hurting.

Dustin lives in Makati, but would go to Cavite para lang mabisita ang tita niya, but now, it's because of my sister.

Nalaman ko na lang na umalis si Crystal at Dustin dahil kila Mommy.

"He said they will come home tonight," Dad said.

Ngayon naman ay umalis ulit sila at nag-mall, and it repeatedly happened every month. Dustin would ask my sister out, and I witnessed how happy my sister was. Binaling ko sa pag-aaral an I entertain some suitors to divert my attention.

"He admits he likes me! Akala ko kaibigan lang. Just like you and him before I get close to Dustin. Last night, he confessed and wanted to court me," she explained while hugging her pillow. She keeps on giggling every time she tells what happened last night.

I smiled. I am happy to see she’s happy too.

"What did you say?" I whispered—hiding the pain in my heart from hearing her story.

"And I said yes! I like him, Cassy, and you know that. I will accept his love on his birthday," she giggled.

She continued to talk about it, and I was there... listening. Secretly hurting from her stories.

"Andiyan ba si Crystal?" Dustin asked when I opened the door one day. He was holding a bouquet of roses that was obviously for my sister.

I nodded. My body stiffened as Dustin hugged me as a sign of greeting. I tapped his shoulder while smiling and opened the door more so he could get in.

"I'll call her," I said and jogged on the stairs to call my sister.

Nagbabasa si Crystal nang maabutan ko sa kwarto nito.

"Nasa baba si Dustin. Do you have plans with him today?" I asked, and she shook her head, but her eyes twinkled with happiness.

"Really?!" she beamed.

"Oh, baka surprise?" I giggled. Crystal immediately stood up and left her room to see her suitor.