Chapter 3: The Accident

IYA COULDN’T COUNT how many days she chose to imprison herself in the four corners of her room. Her bed becomes her companion as if it carries all the burden inside her heart that she felt. Her pillow becomes her silent listener while catching all the tears she cried for the man who does not deserve her love.

She truly loves him. She wouldn't be under this drama if not. No one can question her love for him because she gives all the things that she could give; time, love, or even material things just enough for her to look like a sugar mommy even if Miko has more money compared to her. 

Now, she’s questioning herself if there’s something wrong with her just enough for her to experience this betrayal. No matter how much she asked herself, she couldn’t find the answer to her question. She still doesn't know what’s lacking that he made her stupid like this.

“I’m not an idiot but you made me one…” she said to herself while her eyes were puffy because of crying too much. “If he doesn’t like me anymore, I can easily talk to him. I’m not that idiot not to understand. It’s no excuse to be imprisoned in this relationship just because we had a daughter…”

Miko didn’t say anything to her. He even made a call before the wedding that’s why she assumed that everything was okay. She even believes his flowery words and promises. She felt too secure just enough for her to get blind like this.

“Do you treat me as one of your toys?” She asked the blank space of her ceiling like crazy. “If not, you wouldn’t waste all the memories that we have together. Is it hard for me to tell the truth?”

“Thanks to my trauma I didn’t give you myself again,” from crying, she ended up smirking. “If I give you the last thing that I have, my sanity will disappear too.”

She felt so alone. She couldn’t go to someone and make a call to anyone. Iya doesn’t want to admit to her friends that she made a mistake when she chose him. That all along, they are right. She ended up being blind because of love. 

“For a long time, those around me told me that his father has full control over his boyfriend’s life and I choose to be deaf even if I heard them loud and clear…” She wants to scold herself more but she can't be a masochist that will beat her heart enough.

For a long time, those around her told her that her father was running her boyfriend's life. That Miko has no decision of his own. “They are right…” 

If possible, she wants to shut down for a moment so she will have a break from this unbearable pain—but she can't do that. It will be impossible for the life that she has. She’s not just a superstar, the brightest star of her generation, she's also a mom. So many people depend on her. They are always looking forward to the decision that she will make. If something happens to her, it will be the end of everything.

Before any bad thoughts enter her mind, Iya hears a nonstop doorbell outside of her room. If possible, she doesn’t want to stand up from her bed but it’s not possible. She needs to go on. Her life must continue.

Without thinking twice, she opened the door and automatically regretted it. 

“You still have the guts to show up like nothing happened,” she said with a cold voice. “What do you want—”

“Don’t leave me, Iya!” Miko said with a pleading face. “I know you love me and I feel the same about you. Our relationship will not change. You’re still the only woman that I love—”

Miko couldn’t continue what he was going to say when Iya slapped his face so hard.

“Are you out of your mind? Did you even hear yourself?” she exclaimed loudly. “How can you be so sure that I will allow myself to be your mistress? You, jackass!”

“Y-you’re really breaking up with me?”

She looks at him with a straight face. “What do you think? I will not allow my daughter to see a father who doesn’t have the balls to fight for her!” She quickly closes the door even though she knows that he’s blocking the way. “We’re over—”

“No!” Miko protested loudly. “You will not do this to me, Iya! The public will know that we have a secret daughter the moment that you leave me—”

This time, she didn’t just slap his face but also kicked his stomach which caused him to writhe excessively in pain.

“Now, you will use her as a bribe…” Iya’s face went cold. “I didn’t choose to introduce her to the world even if I wanted to because I know what’s the showbiz world. She’s too innocent to be put on different social media and publications—but you! Her own father can do this to her?”

“I–I’m sorry—”

“No, Miko,” she stares at him like she’s killing him inside her mind. “Don't force me to report your nonsense to your father. I wouldn’t think twice to do everything for her! Do you want me to introduce her to him? You know that I can be crazy for my daughter! Remember, I am not a mistress. My best friend, who is a snake, knows the truth! Do you want me, huh? This is exciting!”

“I–I don’t have a choice!”

Iya sighs heavily. She wanted to calm down but this man reached the limit of her patience.

“I still can’t believe that no matter what your dad tells you to do, you wouldn’t think twice but say yes. That’s our future, Miko. The future of your daughter! Yet…you destroy it easily like garbage!”

Miko couldn’t look straight into her eyes. He knows that this is his fault.

Miko is the type of man who doesn’t have the guts to say no to his parents. He is also a materialistic person. He has a lot of luxury items, especially cars which is a big red flag but maybe she’s too color blind. 

“I’m too focused on the word love,” she couldn’t help but mock herself. “I’m too idiot to let myself get destroyed like this.”

“What are you saying, Iya—”

“This is the last time that you will use my daughter as bait. You know that I can do everything for her so her name won’t get dragged into my mess,” she firmly said. “Goodbye, Miko! We’re over.”

“No, Iya—”

Iya pushed the door so hard when Miko stopped her that’s why she succeeded in closing it. 

The moment that she locks it, her traitor tears suddenly fall as if she’s weeping tears for a deserving person. 

For the first time, Iya opens her windows again…

Because she was absent-minded all day, she didn't notice that it was night already. Iya found a bottle of liquor which had not yet been drunk. She gets the bottle after picking up Melody—her cat. 

Iya closed her eyes while trying to feel the night breeze near the sea. She also quietly listened to the moderate force of the waves hitting the seashore. She mindlessly drinks the bottle of liquor after she opens the cover then looks at the vast ocean that seems endless that she just wants to end. 

She let out a weak laugh. She is in a luxurious place but she is unable to appreciate the paradise that her eyes can see because her brain and heart are both messed up. Her manager and secretary kept calling because they couldn't find her after she left the pending jobs that should have been done. She just told them that she needed rest and chose not to tell the location of her place. 

As much as possible, she wanted to avoid anyone because she didn’t know how to explain what was going on with her. It’s unprofessional to say that she was just experiencing heartbreak.

“What a life that I have!” there’s a mockery in her voice. “It’s always those men!”

She doesn’t know what she has done with her past to end up like this. Whenever she establishes her life and she’s happy, the men in her life easily destroy her happiness. She always ends up crying because of them. 

“M-my daughter… what would I tell her?” just thinking about her little one, she couldn’t help but cry again. 

Her daughter is always her weakness and strength. She will do everything just to shield her from the world even if it includes hiding her.

Iya continues drinking the remaining liquor in her bottle while walking towards the direction of the speedboat she rented and forgot to return before chaos happened to her life. She boarded the speedboat after consuming the remaining contents of the liquor bottle. 

Iya grinds when she finds out that the key to the speedboat is still there after putting down Melody. 

Iya drove recklessly and got wasted. 

She operates the speedboat so fast that she immediately reaches the middle of the vast ocean. She chose to stay there while looking at the sky where she could see the shining stars. Because of the peace and tranquility she felt, Iya gradually fell asleep. She didn't even notice that she was able to run the speedboat while she was asleep and ended it far from nowhere.

The speedboat had been running for a long time until it finally stopped after running out of fuel. It was only then that Iya woke up because of the noise that Melody was making over and over again. 

Iya turned her eyes everywhere to find her cat but she was not inside the speedboat.

“Melody! Where are you?” She asked but couldn’t find her because it was too dark. “Melody!”

While searching for her cat, Iya’s headache became much worse as if someone was drilling her head. Because she’s slightly sober, she even managed to put on a life jacket placed on the floor of the speedboat before moving in another direction just to look for Melody.

“Melody!” she shouted again while her heart was pounding because of so much worry. She even blames herself because she’s not careful and chooses to drive in the middle of the ocean while drunk. 

Her cat is the last memory of her mom. She gave Melody to her as a present before she died. Just the thought that she couldn't see her again was a nightmare for Iya. She’s not ready to handle another loss to her life. 

“Melody!” she shouted again. “Melod—” her eyes widened after she finally saw her fighting for her life in the water. 

Without having a second thought, Iya jumps into the water just to save her cat. At that moment, she couldn’t imagine that she could swim fast and could use what she remembered in her swimming lessons. 

“Melody!” She called her again but this time it was because of relief. “Thank God, you’re safe!”

Iya had only been swimming away a little bit when a strong wave hit her body so hard. That big wave is just enough for her to lose consciousness…