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CHAPTER 68
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Teach Me CHAPTER 69
"Is he okay?" I heard a soft voice behind me. Delia. John's mom."What?" I reflexively said, not even listening to her. I was still in some kind of shock. My chest hurt and my stomach was swirlling. My mind and my head was full, as I was trying to cope with this new situation I'm in. That John's in."Is he okay?" Delia repeated her question. Dr.Johnson called me and said John had another seizure." She said as her voice cracked. I sniffed and leaned on my knees. I was sitting outside John's room because I couldn't get a grip out of myself. "Umm, yes." I managed to say. "He is stable now." I said quietly, barely audible."Why is this happening?" Delia asked, sitting beside me. I backed off a bit, reflexively."We are trying to figure it out." I simply said. I was really not in the mood for her. She remained quiet. I was too.We were sitting there, outside of John's room and just waited I guess. For a few minutes that felt like days, one of us finally spoked. "Do you think they will ca
Teach Me CHAPTER 70
Since forever, I tend to please people. I think that's why I always get into problems. I tend to let people do what they want with me. No matter how they act, I always have need to apologize, to try and try all over again just so they don't have, which always ends up in me being hurt by the same things and people.Which led us to Mike. He done it all. Besides cheating, as far as I know. He hurt me in the way no one else did. Not even John. Either way, those are men who hurt me and I still come back to them either way! Why is it that something always pull you towards your ex. Is it a habit? Very bad habit."Ada will be ready in half an hour." Veronica came to my office. A knock on the door didn't woke me up from my daydreaming so she entered in by herself. I've been here since 5 am. I couldn't sleep at home by myself, Hannah was here dealing with her night shift and I just couldn't cope with anxiety and not knowing how John is going to be. Summary of today's day is that I had approxim
Teach Me CHAPTER 71
I couldn't get myself together. Why is this so hard? Why is talking to your own mother so fucking hard? It isn't supposed to be that way. Nevertheless, I got what I needed from her. Pro bono surgery.When I came down to Peeds again, Darla was standing with Veronica by her front desk. They were talking. When Darla noticed me, she slowly backed off a little like she was talking with Veronica something I mustn't know. Either they were talking about Mike and me or about my mother. I tried to shook that off. "Where is Mr.Bhat?" I asked her when I came closer. I turned my head to Veronica, she smiled lightly. I think she noticed my pale face and swollen eyes, although she didn't say anything. "In Ada's room." She said quietly. "Come. We have great news to tell them." I said, smiling. Darla's eyes instantly got bigger and there was a big spark in them. That made me genuinely happy. I smiled to her again and nodded my head."Really?!" Darla squeeked like a Tweety bird. I laughed."Really
Teach Me CHAPTER 72
What is happening?! Why is her heart stopping? Did Dr.Johnson do everything alright? Is she going to die? "Doctor, her BP is dropping." Nurse said. Dr.Johnson was elbow deep in her brain."Suction!" He exclaimed. My heart was beating loudly as I listened to her flat line. Nurse quickly suctioned and he made sharp dissection over the olfactory bulb to disconnect the bulb and expose the anterior extradural extension of the tumor. I watched with such pride and fear! "Her BP is not going up doctor." Nurse said a little louder because it seemed like he's so focused on Ada's tumor that he doesn't realize that she's dying. "Dr.Johnson!" I intervened. I couldn't hold it in any longer, he is going to kill her! He raised his head and I saw anger in his eyes as he narrowed them. I blinked quickly, trying to get a grip of myself.I just yelled at the main surgeon during the surgery."Ventricular fibrillation!" Anesthesiologist said to Dr.Johnson. He sighed deeply. "Dr.Miller." He turned to m
Teach Me CHAPTER 73
My hands was still shaking 20 minutes after Ada's surgery. My first 12 hours long surgery was successful. This was a huge thing! I wanted to call Mike but it was 4 am, he was probably sleeping. He didn't even send me a simple text after our fight and that was childish from him but I don't have time to deal with that anymore. I am close to breaking things between us to be honest. I think I came to some kind of border. I will either stay with him forever or I will leave him. When I think about that more, the more I want to end this off and on-going relationship. If I would ever write on a paper 'pro and con' style, there would be a lot of bad things. He is jealous, controlling and he is always hiding something. And always something hideous. He thinks that with his money he can buy love and everything that he misses the most. I have good memories with him too, I would lie if I say differently! But that was like a gram of salt in the ocean. He can be very charming and persuading when it'
Teach Me CHAPTER 74
"Oh thank God...." Was my first sentence after my body dropped on my bed. Oh, the feeling like I float on the clouds, just unspeakably good. That was the longest shift ever and the longest day that existed. Thank God it's over.I thought I died and came back when my phone went off. With my eyes still closed I tried to reach it on my nightstand as I assumed it's my alarm. I sensed I pushed a few buttons but it just kept ringing. When I opened my eyes, I realized it was a phone call. "Hi baby." Mike."Hmm?" I asked still halfly sleeping."Are you sleeping?" He said what I could sensed, through smile. I caughed a little, trying to get a grip of myself. I still couldn't move or get up."Yes. I was until you called me." I said quietly, rolling my eyes. He didn't say anything on that, he just smiled. "When do you have to be on work today?" He asked me. "I thought maybe you could come in my office and see me... I want to talk to you." He said quietly. I sighed deeply, remembering our fig
Teach Me CHAPTER 75
I did it again. I gave in. I have managed to disappoint me one more time. How can I be so weak, just how many times I have to hurt myself with what is so wrong yet it feels so damn good?"Sex isn't supposed to be an answer." I said after I buttoned up the last button on my shirt. He was already done."I know." He simply said, repairing his Rolex."So why are we doing that?" I asked, sitting down. "Do what? I want you. Isn't that enough?" He looked at me puzzled. I was stunned by the fact that he doesn't seem to see the real problem is. "No, Mike. Sometimes it's not." I said standing up. Why am I suddenly feel angry? I am to blame here, I let him manipulate me one more time. He just used that so well! "What is your problem Jessica?" He exclaimed. I backed off a little. "What do you want?" He raised his voice. I narrowed my eyes and sighed deeply. To be honest, I don't know what I want. "I want you. But not just sex. I want the whole package! Conversation, going on a trip, go to par
Teach Me CHAPTER 76
I went to the park. I managed to stay calm and cool long enough so I can walk and sit ona n empty bench. I felt exhausted. I felt really worned out for some reason like all my energy went somewhere else. I started feeling nauseated. Why? I don't even know what I heard! Did Mike and his Gorilla killed someone? At least tried to?! I shook my head in disbelief because I just knew, all of this sounds so ridiculous and unreal. I tried to comprehend all of that information. That can't be right, I heard something wrong and I made some scenario in my head, I surely misheard."You are being stupid, Jess." I said barely audible to myself. I was looking around me as I tried to calm my nerves. There was just a few people in the park but the weather was nice. Small, sweet breeze was calmly blowing making leaves do a little song of their own. That calmed my mind a little. I noticed small children and I heard their giggles while they run towards their parents. That made me smile! I started feeling
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Teach Me CHAPTER 83
"What the hell?" Hannah repeated herself because we ignored her the first time."What are you doing here?" I asked him, narrowing my eyes, still ignoring Hannah."Well, since you're not answering me, I came to make sure my girlfriend is still alive." Mike said coldly, clenching his jaw."As you see, I am so..." Filled with anger, I rolled my eyes."Can we talk?" He asked, slowly yet strongly grabbing my arm. I flinched, feeling pain. Hannah was just standing there, confused as she can be."Not a place or time Mike." I said firmly but I was visibly scared and that annoyed me. I shouldn't be afraid of him, I don't have a reason for that. Right?"Something happened?" He asked me, now looking genuinely concerned and confused. Then it hit me. He doesn't have a clue that I overheard his conversation. How could I be so stupid and let my emotions get the best of me?"We will talk later okay?" I said as my face softened. He looked at me, one eyebrow up, still mad. He growled under his voice an
Teach Me CHAPTER 82
"Sleepyhead..." I heard a soft voice near me. Air smelled like our toothpaste and mix of herbs from Hannah's shampoo. Although I smiled lightly, knowing it was her, I still didn't want to wake up."Nooo..." I whined and turned on the other side. Hannah smiled and leaned on me, sighing deeply."When did you even got home last night?" She asked, still on my body. I moaned, not happy with that. "I know what will make you got up." She said, slowly getting up. I moaned again, feeling lighter and relieved that I can just roll over on the other side of my bed, completely ignoring her. Realizing it wasn't the smartest move as she grabbed my legs and started pulling me out, I started laughing."Stoooop, leave me in peace!" I managed to mumble as she continued to pull me up. I tried to budge but I couldn't. How the hell is she so strong?!"I got engaged!" Hannah exclaimed, finally letting me go."What?!" I lifted my head so rapidly, the whole room started spinning! She was screaming and jumping
Teach Me CHAPTER 81
My head was at the verge of blowing up like the ones in cartoons. There was too much information I needed to cope, too deafening sounds, everything was spinning. Me, the room, everything! I felt numb and over-touched, cranky, mad, all feelings you could think of and none of them in the same time. I didn't even knew until now that that's possible.My shift ended vaguely, honestly I'm happy I didn't kill anybody! All I could think is how I will eventually go home and tell Hannah everything what was heavy on my crazy noggin.Darla didn't say anything for the rest of our shift. I could only imagine what's in her head now, poor girl...I got a text from Hannah asking if I'm ready for our date night. I was more then ready but I wanted to do one more thing before I head home."Hi you..." John's head lifted up when he saw me entering his room. "Did I woke you up?" I asked, carefully closing the door. I stood by them as my legs wouldn't let me come closer to him for some reason."I won't bite
Teach Me CHAPTER 80
"What the hell is going on?!" I yelled a little bit louder than I expected. Few doctors that was passing by with patients looked at me concerned. I brushed it off. Soon enough, my mom will hear about this, but I can't deal with this now."Dr.Miller." Veronica called my name in so calming voice, my anger vanished in thin air. I slowly turned around. She looked at me, smiling acidly, slightly tilting her head."I'm sorry." I said to her. She didn't say anything, she just shrugged her shoulders and smiled. I felt bad for not knowing how to control. "Let's continue this in my office, shall we?" I asked, faking a smile and politeness so we don't draw any more attention. I felt eyes all over me as patients and hospital staff were suddenly walking slowly, trying to catch a glimpse of our conversation. Miller's daughter causing the drama. Big news. Darla and Delia both started walking behind me as I tried to go into my office as soon as possible. My head was spinning really fast and I felt l
Teach Me CHAPTER 79
"She is fine!" Mr.Bhat said after he stopped hugging us. "She is fine thanks to you doctor Miller and you doctor Care." He said, closing his palms and bowing to us. Ann's surname is Care? Why does that sounds familiar? I quickly brushed off that for now, I can't be dealing with that too. I smiled politely to Mr.Bhat, bowing to him, as he did to us."You don't have to thank us for that Mr.Bhat, we did our best." I said firmly. I was so proud of myself, so fulfilled, so good about myself! We saved that girl's life! "She is sleeping now." Mr.Bhat said, approaching Ada's bed. He slowly and gently caressed her hair and smiled. He looked peaceful. "You don't need to wake her up, we will just do a little checkup." I said as I grabbed a pen out of my uniform. I checked her temperature, it was 36.6 Celsius which is quite normal. Excellent."She may feel dizzy or groggy as she come around from general anaesthetic." I said to him, caressing her hand. "We will check her blood pressure regularly.
Teach Me CHAPTER 78
"I'm sorry I'm late." Darla quickly came beside me after Dr.Stepford and me started walking towards Nina's room. I rolled my eyes when I looked at her but I didn't want to say anything."Dr.Miller?" Dr.Stepford raised his glasses while we walked and looked me dead serious. "Are you going to let your intern be late?" He smirked. "I want 20 pages on AIDS research. By tomorrow morning." I stated seriously. Dr.Stepford chuckle a bit, sounding like a teenage girl. I bet he was amused by this as he probably remembered some of my mom's situation again and how much I do look like her. I smiled to myself and I was proud how I quickly got an idea for Darla's punishment but I put on my straight face instantly. Darla didn't say anything, she was probably too scared.I promise I won't be so hard on her once she toughen up a bit. She can't be soft, not on Pediatric, let alone Pediatric surgery. In Africa, I had a resident who was so strict, my hair would go up when I remember her. But she was fair
Teach Me CHAPTER 77
We kept walking until she stopped us in front of the door, right next to John's room. What is her plan? We will easdrop? I hope not! Hannah looked at both directions and slowly opened the door in front of us. I was confused."What are you doing?" I whispered to Hannah, hoping she will hear me. She just smiled and continue with her plan. We entered a patient's room, an old lady seemed to be sleeping. I looked puzzled as I was looking around her room, trying to figure out Hannah's thoughts. Hannah turned over to me and rolled her eyes."This is Elenore. She is in a coma. Come." She said that bluntly, like we do that on our daily basis, like this, whatever this is is normal."Hannah." I exclaimed quietly, yet strongly enough for her to stop. She looked at me again, now confused like I'm the one who's crazy. I couldn't help but smile."She won't hear us, what?!" She asked, opening her arms towards me in isn't-it-obvious way. I shook my head and smiled. I might just let go all my question
Teach Me CHAPTER 76
I went to the park. I managed to stay calm and cool long enough so I can walk and sit ona n empty bench. I felt exhausted. I felt really worned out for some reason like all my energy went somewhere else. I started feeling nauseated. Why? I don't even know what I heard! Did Mike and his Gorilla killed someone? At least tried to?! I shook my head in disbelief because I just knew, all of this sounds so ridiculous and unreal. I tried to comprehend all of that information. That can't be right, I heard something wrong and I made some scenario in my head, I surely misheard."You are being stupid, Jess." I said barely audible to myself. I was looking around me as I tried to calm my nerves. There was just a few people in the park but the weather was nice. Small, sweet breeze was calmly blowing making leaves do a little song of their own. That calmed my mind a little. I noticed small children and I heard their giggles while they run towards their parents. That made me smile! I started feeling
Teach Me CHAPTER 75
I did it again. I gave in. I have managed to disappoint me one more time. How can I be so weak, just how many times I have to hurt myself with what is so wrong yet it feels so damn good?"Sex isn't supposed to be an answer." I said after I buttoned up the last button on my shirt. He was already done."I know." He simply said, repairing his Rolex."So why are we doing that?" I asked, sitting down. "Do what? I want you. Isn't that enough?" He looked at me puzzled. I was stunned by the fact that he doesn't seem to see the real problem is. "No, Mike. Sometimes it's not." I said standing up. Why am I suddenly feel angry? I am to blame here, I let him manipulate me one more time. He just used that so well! "What is your problem Jessica?" He exclaimed. I backed off a little. "What do you want?" He raised his voice. I narrowed my eyes and sighed deeply. To be honest, I don't know what I want. "I want you. But not just sex. I want the whole package! Conversation, going on a trip, go to par
