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CHAPTER 44
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Teach Me CHAPTER 45
"John?" I aksed nervously."You came back?" He asked with shaky voice. I was surprised he called so I was left speechless, I had no words."Umm... Yea..." I tried to talk normal, I tried to mumble, still not knowing how to react on this call. I haven't heard his voice since forever! I felt frustration and tingling sensation throughout my whole body. I couldn't believe I was so shook by his call."Are you free tonight?" He asked barely audible, and his voice was shaking almost visibly."I am now." I said quickly. Too quickly, I think. I closed my eyes, trying to mind-slap my forehead. How can I be so stupid! I was shaking my head and Hannah looked at me nervously. Until I sat there waiting for John's responce, I whispered his name to her. She opened her eyes widely and George covered his mouth in surprise. I nodded weakly, still confused by his call like George and Hannah were."That coffee shop across your apartment? In 10 minutes?" He finally spoke. "Sure." I said too quickly again
Teach Me CHAPTER 46
"So, how it went?" Hannah asked me as we were driving to hospital. It was my first day of work here and I am both excited and scared I will mess something up. Knowing me, I will. I was quiet. I wasn't going to answer Hannah's question because her question is refering to last night. My meeting with John. After the most awkward coffee I ever had, I came home so confused, looking exhausted as hell just like I always look like when meeting John. Why? After meeting him, my past and my present, even my future depends on what is he going to say. I never thought I will be so weak in front of someone who hurted me so much!"You know, eventually, you will have to speak you know?" Hannah said sarcastically. I let the biggest sigh out, letting all air out of my lungs and closed my eyes."I don't want to..." I almost started crying as I felt tears in my eyes. "I am at the very start like I was when I left Seattle. I though everything will be so... Different you know?" I said sadly. "Mike was lyin
Teach Me CHAPTER 47
"Dr.Miller?" I heard my name as I came out of my official office. It was nice in change of a small tent back in Africa."Yes?" I said, turning around myself until I find out who's calling me. I will have to get used to the fact that people here will call me dr.Miller. It sounded funny in my head, and not at all real! "Here, dr.Miller." Older girl's voice spoke to me again. I turned around one more time to see an old lady in her nurse uniform sitting by the desk. I assumed she is the main nurse here, judging by her wrinkles and the way she was standing by that desk, like she's been here a very long time."Yes?" I repeated my question as I tried to look less like it was my first day. She smiled politely, realising I am new here."Someone asked for you." She said as she started going throughout some files."Me?" I asked confusingly. Did she remember doctors name right?I couldn't figure it out who would already look for me. I'm working like 3 hours maybe. Until now, I have one patient
Teach Me CHAPTER 48
"UGH!" I yelled to myself out loud. I was watching little Ada's files and I've been researched every site and every book in hope to find something that could save that little angel's life. There has to be something! "Hannah!" I said out loud again as I started searching my phone to call her. She was at work too but she is at the opposite side of this hospital so it would be easier to just call her. And I was lazy to get up and go find her so... Call it is."Hey Hannas I..." I started talking as soon I heard she picked up her phone but I heard sobbing so I stopped. First thing that popped in my head was that her day isn't going great either and she is having a meltdown."Jess?" Hannah said lightly and barely audible."Look, Hannah, whatever happend you-" I tried to give her my best prep talk but she interrupted me."You heard?" She asked weakly, still sobbing. I shook my head not realizing what is she talking about."Heard what?" I asked as my heart started beating hard and my breath
Teach Me CHAPTER 49
"Miss, you need to move." I heard someone's voice beside me but I couldn't move my body. I was too weak to lift myself up. I was still crying over John's body and I never lose myself that hard.I know I am basically on work now so I was not supposed to be here but I didn't cared. It was John who layed here so I couldn't think of work now. Who could?"Jess please. Stand up." Then I heard a familiar voice and as I lifted my face, I saw Hannah standing in front of me. She was still having red eyes from crying but the older doctor who was standing beside her had looked at both of us confusingly."There." He said quietly as I finally took enough strength to stand up. "Wife?" He asked weakly, trying to understand why am I acting like that.I slowly shook my head, looking at a floor. "I... Work here..." I somehow managed to say."I assumed, based on your uniform Dr.-" He paused as his eyes looked for my name tag. "Miller." He finally said. "Is he-" I started but I couldn't force myself to
Teach Me CHAPTER 50
I don't know for how long have I been laying here by John's bed. It might been around 8 pm because it was already dark outside. I haven't looked at my phone, maybe someone called me, maybe not. I haven't felt nor pain, hunger, nothing. I was numb. I don't care. All I can care now is that John will be ok. He has to wake up.Don't get me wrong, I have feelings for Mike. We are still together, I think. I don't know to be honest. Maybe it was stupid of me or cliché to expect maybe a nice and warm welcome from my boyfriend after all those years we haven't seen each other. Maybe I was stupid to expect he will be waiting for me at an airport or in my apartment. Maybe I was stupid to think he misses me, he wants to be with me. Maybe."Fucked up." I said angrily wipping my tears off my face. I don't know how long I've been crying. Maybe my expectations were too high.Maybe Hannah was right. I can't expect people's feeling won't get changed after I leave. It wasn't months. It was years. But wha
Teach Me CHAPTER 51
"Will you come visit him with me tomorrow?" I asked Mike still laying my head on his shoulder. He's been comforting me for about an hour now and I was still confused about it. I was just waiting for old Mike to appear, leaving me helpless with his mood changes like he always do."Jessica..." He started, not continuing. I backed off from his hug slowly, looking for his reaction. His face expression was almost like he's angry but he doesn't want to show me.Please, not yet. I need this Mike, I thought trying to read his mind. I would do anything to be able to read his mind, just once. To find out what in the hell is happening in there."So, that's no?" I asked suspiciously. He just lowered his look so I figured it out on my own. "I tried." I said mostly to myself as I smiled sarcasticaly. I reached my limit of good Mike today, I thought. It was weird he was hugging me after crying over John, but to agree to come to visit him? How could I even be so silly?Lower that sarcasm.My inner v
Teach Me CHAPTER 52
"Where have you been?" I asked Delia when she came into my apartment.Delia left John when he was little. I never understood how can a mother leave her own child. Abandon your own blood. What reason should be justified by doing such a horrible thing?"Jessica, it was hard..." Delia said after a few moments of silence. Hard? She looks like a model now, remembering her face when I was little, she doesn't look like someone who had a rough life! She is well dressed, her body is in perfect shape, she looks great!"Hard for who? Your husband died! You didn't even came to his funeral!" I raised my voice remembering that horrible funeral and I instantly got a quick flashback to what happened in Detroit that day. I shook those images off. I really can't go back now..."I coudn't come. Believe me, I wanted to but..." She started but her voice trailed off. I rolled my eyes in disapproval. What can be more important then your own family?"Spare me Delia." I said smirking sarcasticaly. Truth is, I
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Teach Me CHAPTER 83
"What the hell?" Hannah repeated herself because we ignored her the first time."What are you doing here?" I asked him, narrowing my eyes, still ignoring Hannah."Well, since you're not answering me, I came to make sure my girlfriend is still alive." Mike said coldly, clenching his jaw."As you see, I am so..." Filled with anger, I rolled my eyes."Can we talk?" He asked, slowly yet strongly grabbing my arm. I flinched, feeling pain. Hannah was just standing there, confused as she can be."Not a place or time Mike." I said firmly but I was visibly scared and that annoyed me. I shouldn't be afraid of him, I don't have a reason for that. Right?"Something happened?" He asked me, now looking genuinely concerned and confused. Then it hit me. He doesn't have a clue that I overheard his conversation. How could I be so stupid and let my emotions get the best of me?"We will talk later okay?" I said as my face softened. He looked at me, one eyebrow up, still mad. He growled under his voice an
Teach Me CHAPTER 82
"Sleepyhead..." I heard a soft voice near me. Air smelled like our toothpaste and mix of herbs from Hannah's shampoo. Although I smiled lightly, knowing it was her, I still didn't want to wake up."Nooo..." I whined and turned on the other side. Hannah smiled and leaned on me, sighing deeply."When did you even got home last night?" She asked, still on my body. I moaned, not happy with that. "I know what will make you got up." She said, slowly getting up. I moaned again, feeling lighter and relieved that I can just roll over on the other side of my bed, completely ignoring her. Realizing it wasn't the smartest move as she grabbed my legs and started pulling me out, I started laughing."Stoooop, leave me in peace!" I managed to mumble as she continued to pull me up. I tried to budge but I couldn't. How the hell is she so strong?!"I got engaged!" Hannah exclaimed, finally letting me go."What?!" I lifted my head so rapidly, the whole room started spinning! She was screaming and jumping
Teach Me CHAPTER 81
My head was at the verge of blowing up like the ones in cartoons. There was too much information I needed to cope, too deafening sounds, everything was spinning. Me, the room, everything! I felt numb and over-touched, cranky, mad, all feelings you could think of and none of them in the same time. I didn't even knew until now that that's possible.My shift ended vaguely, honestly I'm happy I didn't kill anybody! All I could think is how I will eventually go home and tell Hannah everything what was heavy on my crazy noggin.Darla didn't say anything for the rest of our shift. I could only imagine what's in her head now, poor girl...I got a text from Hannah asking if I'm ready for our date night. I was more then ready but I wanted to do one more thing before I head home."Hi you..." John's head lifted up when he saw me entering his room. "Did I woke you up?" I asked, carefully closing the door. I stood by them as my legs wouldn't let me come closer to him for some reason."I won't bite
Teach Me CHAPTER 80
"What the hell is going on?!" I yelled a little bit louder than I expected. Few doctors that was passing by with patients looked at me concerned. I brushed it off. Soon enough, my mom will hear about this, but I can't deal with this now."Dr.Miller." Veronica called my name in so calming voice, my anger vanished in thin air. I slowly turned around. She looked at me, smiling acidly, slightly tilting her head."I'm sorry." I said to her. She didn't say anything, she just shrugged her shoulders and smiled. I felt bad for not knowing how to control. "Let's continue this in my office, shall we?" I asked, faking a smile and politeness so we don't draw any more attention. I felt eyes all over me as patients and hospital staff were suddenly walking slowly, trying to catch a glimpse of our conversation. Miller's daughter causing the drama. Big news. Darla and Delia both started walking behind me as I tried to go into my office as soon as possible. My head was spinning really fast and I felt l
Teach Me CHAPTER 79
"She is fine!" Mr.Bhat said after he stopped hugging us. "She is fine thanks to you doctor Miller and you doctor Care." He said, closing his palms and bowing to us. Ann's surname is Care? Why does that sounds familiar? I quickly brushed off that for now, I can't be dealing with that too. I smiled politely to Mr.Bhat, bowing to him, as he did to us."You don't have to thank us for that Mr.Bhat, we did our best." I said firmly. I was so proud of myself, so fulfilled, so good about myself! We saved that girl's life! "She is sleeping now." Mr.Bhat said, approaching Ada's bed. He slowly and gently caressed her hair and smiled. He looked peaceful. "You don't need to wake her up, we will just do a little checkup." I said as I grabbed a pen out of my uniform. I checked her temperature, it was 36.6 Celsius which is quite normal. Excellent."She may feel dizzy or groggy as she come around from general anaesthetic." I said to him, caressing her hand. "We will check her blood pressure regularly.
Teach Me CHAPTER 78
"I'm sorry I'm late." Darla quickly came beside me after Dr.Stepford and me started walking towards Nina's room. I rolled my eyes when I looked at her but I didn't want to say anything."Dr.Miller?" Dr.Stepford raised his glasses while we walked and looked me dead serious. "Are you going to let your intern be late?" He smirked. "I want 20 pages on AIDS research. By tomorrow morning." I stated seriously. Dr.Stepford chuckle a bit, sounding like a teenage girl. I bet he was amused by this as he probably remembered some of my mom's situation again and how much I do look like her. I smiled to myself and I was proud how I quickly got an idea for Darla's punishment but I put on my straight face instantly. Darla didn't say anything, she was probably too scared.I promise I won't be so hard on her once she toughen up a bit. She can't be soft, not on Pediatric, let alone Pediatric surgery. In Africa, I had a resident who was so strict, my hair would go up when I remember her. But she was fair
Teach Me CHAPTER 77
We kept walking until she stopped us in front of the door, right next to John's room. What is her plan? We will easdrop? I hope not! Hannah looked at both directions and slowly opened the door in front of us. I was confused."What are you doing?" I whispered to Hannah, hoping she will hear me. She just smiled and continue with her plan. We entered a patient's room, an old lady seemed to be sleeping. I looked puzzled as I was looking around her room, trying to figure out Hannah's thoughts. Hannah turned over to me and rolled her eyes."This is Elenore. She is in a coma. Come." She said that bluntly, like we do that on our daily basis, like this, whatever this is is normal."Hannah." I exclaimed quietly, yet strongly enough for her to stop. She looked at me again, now confused like I'm the one who's crazy. I couldn't help but smile."She won't hear us, what?!" She asked, opening her arms towards me in isn't-it-obvious way. I shook my head and smiled. I might just let go all my question
Teach Me CHAPTER 76
I went to the park. I managed to stay calm and cool long enough so I can walk and sit ona n empty bench. I felt exhausted. I felt really worned out for some reason like all my energy went somewhere else. I started feeling nauseated. Why? I don't even know what I heard! Did Mike and his Gorilla killed someone? At least tried to?! I shook my head in disbelief because I just knew, all of this sounds so ridiculous and unreal. I tried to comprehend all of that information. That can't be right, I heard something wrong and I made some scenario in my head, I surely misheard."You are being stupid, Jess." I said barely audible to myself. I was looking around me as I tried to calm my nerves. There was just a few people in the park but the weather was nice. Small, sweet breeze was calmly blowing making leaves do a little song of their own. That calmed my mind a little. I noticed small children and I heard their giggles while they run towards their parents. That made me smile! I started feeling
Teach Me CHAPTER 75
I did it again. I gave in. I have managed to disappoint me one more time. How can I be so weak, just how many times I have to hurt myself with what is so wrong yet it feels so damn good?"Sex isn't supposed to be an answer." I said after I buttoned up the last button on my shirt. He was already done."I know." He simply said, repairing his Rolex."So why are we doing that?" I asked, sitting down. "Do what? I want you. Isn't that enough?" He looked at me puzzled. I was stunned by the fact that he doesn't seem to see the real problem is. "No, Mike. Sometimes it's not." I said standing up. Why am I suddenly feel angry? I am to blame here, I let him manipulate me one more time. He just used that so well! "What is your problem Jessica?" He exclaimed. I backed off a little. "What do you want?" He raised his voice. I narrowed my eyes and sighed deeply. To be honest, I don't know what I want. "I want you. But not just sex. I want the whole package! Conversation, going on a trip, go to par
