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35. Finn
Last Updated:
2024-10-29 19:42:56
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Resisting the Beta 36. Naomi
It was unsettling without Leona. Remembering that everyone around me didn’t have an automatic sense of how I was feeling. Guiding my women into position, their arrows, and lighter fuel ready to go, I could easily imagine my sister. Face furrowed in concentration. Double checking her equipment. Betting with me on the likelihood the enemy would refer to us as bitches.. She would be magnificent. All those times we defended Cragstone together. Now I'm forced to inhale, stand proud, and give Diane Jackson a wry smile. Although, to her credit, she hasn’t mentioned kissing, laying her hands on, or sleeping with Finn once since the night I returned. /Good. She’d be no use after we’d finished with her/ Impes growled possessively. Our long lines of dynamite exploded, Alpha Nikolai and Zeke sprinted with their men through the shattered minefield. "NOW!" I cry, our flaming arrows soaring overhead like hellfire. Finn’s idea looks to have worked perfectly. In the smoke and confusion, the
Resisting the Beta 37. Finn
The fire seized me. Beyond anything I could control. All the muscles are attached to none of the brain. Those burning buildings took me back to a place I never wish to visit again. Clutching a lifeless Naomi. then Rami in my arms, wondering if the sacrifice needed was my own life. I leapt out of that top window fully willing to offer it. Adamo took care of me that night. After a few seconds 6 panic, I felt my gentle, kind wolf nudging me to look towards the western side of Bridgend. Had my wolf cursed and belittled me, I might have never moved again. Instead, we looked to the non-burning areas. Clearing my throat and pointing, I tried to sound authoritative. “We’ll go this way. Around the far edge of the city. Catch them off guard. They’ll all be running towards the fire, the explosions. Might be prepping traps, gathering weapons back there." “Are we not meant to join the fight straight away?” Dash asked, his freckled face screwed in confusion. “No you’re meant to follow
Resisting the Beta 38. Naomi
We could smell Nikolai even before Finn charged through the arched stone doorway. It was a heartbreaking sight. For such a tall, powerful man to be helplessly splayed out, resembling a butcher's discarded cut of meat. Zeke’s hands and arms were raw from trying to lift away the weighted, criss-crossed silver laced netting. Covering his hands just saw Zeke’s arms and even his face branded with silver burns, such was the panic to release Nikolai from his trap. It took waiting for Cillian to arrive to provide the lift and strength to get it away as cleanly as possible. Savages. /All those traps need destroying before we leave here./ /Absolutely. Good idea/ Finn agreed silently. But right now, Nikoali was naked. Seared from head to toe in grisly black lines, angry red boils already erupting around the flesh. “Get me home! Just get me home to Genevieve,” he screamed before his eyes rolled into the back of his head. “I need Vee.” Across our bond flowed sorrow and heartache. If I
Resisting the Beta 1. Phoebe
/Phoebe. Phoebe come on!/ The frustrated voice of Sawyer jump into my brain. Shit, he must be getting closer. I thought I’d done a good job this time. /Please just leave me alone. Lie for once?/ /You know I can’t do that. It’s not just your Mama now, Cillian is concerned too./ /Cillian has absolutely zero reason to be concerned about me/ I reply back sarcastically. I’m a nobody. He's only trying to shut up my mothers nagging. /Phoebe!/ Sawyer growls once more before the mind link finally cuts off. /He’ll find us. He always does./ Huli complained, her tinny, grating voice loud and clear in my head. No Sawyer will give up soon. He made it clear last time he’s sick of chasing us around. Hugging my legs and sitting a little lower in the field. Hiding from everything. Sawyer will soon find something better to do than stare at me with that immovable look of pure annoyance. /He's just pure, cold ice inside/ Huli says with a low growl. Being scrunched down low whilst the
Resisting the Beta 1. Phoebe (Continued)
Naomi jumps out, grinning at me, and I can’t help running even harder towards her. Does she even know how badass she makes black look? It’s just sportswear, but the way she carries it, how do you ever have that much self-belief? “Naomi! I didn't think you'd come back! I’m dodging Sawyer, Mama is always sending him to fetch me back to Cragstone.” “Why are you always getting away? Is there something wrong?” she asks, and I don’t even know where to begin. It's shameful not to get along with your wolf. To admit you're lonely and the only person you talk to regularly is hired to bother finding you. I need her to stay around long enough. Maybe I could even ask her for advice about Huli. her wolf might be a handful, too, for all I know. I open my mouth to try and string something together except for my other sister. “Hey! What are you doing this far out!” Leona interrupts, shouting out of the truck window. She can piss off, always treating me like a baby. Naomi is the one staring at m
Resisting the Beta 2. Sawyer
Climbing on top of the truck cabin, I got a view of a thick rising column of smoke over a mile away. /Anyone close?/ I link out to my fellow Beta Warriors. /Half an hour south of Cragstone?/ Beta Riley answers separately /Is it that black smoke in the distance?/ /We should check it out. Meet you there?/ Then Phoebe’s voice bounced into my head. Deceptively sweet and gentle for someone who hurled a rock at me the last time I tried to get her to come home. /Sawyer, are you there?/ Goddess help me. Of course she’s finally found herself in some real trouble. No doubt the cause of that fire, I bet. I didn’t panic until the link went quiet. The trembling fear in her voice hit me hard. Almost like the air had been sucked out of my lungs. No mocking. Just a plea. For me. That’s a first. She’s called me every curse word under the sun over the past few months. Mostly amusing, sometimes seriously fucking annoying. More annoying is the blue-eyed, fussing Penelope. Like a vul
Resisting the Beta 2. Sawyer (Continued)
“I don’t need babysitting Sawyer,” Phoebe complains. Of course. As always. “It’s not babysitting. It’s guarding. It’s also not an option. Now go inside,” I bark. She slams the door in my face, muttering expletives before gentle, sobbing noises eke out from under the wooden door. Half an hour later, Eleanor reopens it and whispers, “Thank you Sawyer. You’re a good friend to us.” “Just following orders,” I lie again. It’s just responsibility to the pack. I’d do the same for anyone else. We’re not even friends. I’m fairly certain I’m her nemesis. Well in a few weeks she’ll be chasing full moon dances like the rest of them. Probably mated to someone easily bossed around like Dash or Theo. Phoebe Kharkov coming of age. Bizarre, considering she sometimes has the temperament of a five year old. I imagine when she isn’t scowling, cursing or running away, she could be considered a beauty. She's clever too when doesn’t shrink in on herself or resort to childish insults. Comi
Resisting the Beta 3. Phoebe
The orange dress Mama picked out was only one of the reasons I had to get out of the house. The sobbing takes me straight back to losing my father. I head over to Finn’s cottage for the first time in my life and find Naomi slumped on the floor bawling, the same position as I left my Mama. We don’t talk about that. We don’t talk about Finn either. Finn was exasperated when we crossed paths. Maybe that’s why he gave me the crap advice to suggest Rami is trying to fight like Naomi. He isn’t. Rami is just a whirling lump of chubby fists. So I received yet another withering look from Naomi. It’s like Leona is still here. Identical ire and exasperation. Nothing I want to say comes up during my brief time at the cottage. Like, what were all the books? Why were they coming back so soon? What were they rowing about before Naomi jumped out? Naomi refuses to wear the dress. I hate my orange, itchy monstrosity, so why did I agree? /Because you’re the baby Kharkov/ Huli sneers. Wh
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Resisting the Beta Epilogue Four
Naomi (Continued) “I meant to ask you something,” Finn murmurs sleepily as we watch yet another shooting star go by. “Did it bother you that we never had a ceremony?” “No…no it just never felt the right time, then we had been together so long it almost didn’t matter?” “It’s a shame. Your sisters had all promised to walk together.” “We did it for Matilda. If things had gone differently, we would have walked for Eleanor and Rhett, but it all broke apart. I'm just glad we all found happiness, even if it wasn't in the same town square.” “Did Sia give you an address for Eleanor?” “Yes but I left it alone in the end. She knows where we are. She’s made a choice a long time ago,” I whisper sadly, clutching my King’s hand tightly. I know every wrinkle and line in his muscular frame. I could make his replica out of clay in every pose. The feel of his body is a memory I constantly revisit. “I found my memory box the other day when we were packing,” I add. “I didn’t know you had o
Resisting the Beta Epilogue Three
Naomi It’s been fifty years since we took over as Alpha and Luna this full moon. Fifty years. Time has the cruellest ability to just vanish from underneath your feet. I swear I was a feisty, opinionated, quad-bike obsessed woman in her twenties just the other day. Now, creeping upon me like a riptide, I'm a content, slow-moving little fossil. I’m his girl, his Queen. He is my King. Now and forever. The quad-bike-revving beast of a man who only ever cares for us. I love the fact I’m still his girl even as time eats away at our vitality. My hair is no longer fiery red. I’ve conceded to grey. He insists it only makes my brown eyes all the prettier. I’d blush, except I love every word he says. I still find any opportunity to stand above him and bring my face to his, marvelling at the lack of wrinkles on his relaxed, still-boyish features. We’re currently down on the very south of the Shadowlands coast, in Finn’s old family home, left to him by his parents. I wonder if all o
Resisting the Beta Epilogue Two
*** SEVEN MONTHS LATER*** PHOEBE It is strange when the life you thought you always wanted lands in your lap. Except they don’t feed your soul. I lecture students on human and shifter history. An expert in my bitterly-learned field. The contrasting versions of events. The dangers of automatically believing the only side of the story you have access to. The fact history is always told from the side of the winner. I stride the corridors, my wedding band and bumblebee pendant permanently part of me. But it’s not enough. Jane and Wren are so incredibly kind. The hours I've spent talking through Huli and those momths with them have been cathartic. Even so, they know Rising Star isn’t what I want. Not without Sawyer. Of course, it would have been ungrateful to protest at Alpha Finn’s decision. Two people voted for me to die. Including my own sister. Alpha Finn saved me whilst yanking Sawyer away. It’s been seven months, yet every night, I lie awake. I think of the same mom
Resisting the Beta Epilogue One
*** 7 MONTHS LATER *** ALPHA FINN “Alpha!” That fake-serious, minx of a voice forces me to pause. Not ideal when halfway across the Jackson’s roof, retrieving Rami’s misplaced arrow. Again. Considering he is meant to be an archery prodigy, he seems to fire it up into that thatched cottage’s eaves with annoying regularity. “This is your fault, Luna!” I shout back, fully aware of her laughing from the packhouse. When she sends a bolt of seriously dirty thoughts across our bond, I almost put my foot into the chimney. Thankfully, Diane is with Beta Tucker again, straightening out his boredom-driven drinking via pure seduction. "IT WAS ME!” Rami adds with glee. Naomi innocently claims the practice targets Rami uses simply must face the Jackson’s cottage. I don’t argue. Not when my girl slinks around in dark bodysuits that leave my hands twitching to wrap around her waist. I have no arguments, only desires. Any argument she has formulating just vanishes away at the soun
Resisting the Beta 45. Phoebe
My mouth drops open, but there is nothing to say. Nikolai doesn’t suffer the same issue. “Now just fuck off a minute-” but Cillian doesn’t even flinch. Zeke and Freya step forward, their eyes wide with surprise. "You haven't discussed this with us?" “Look, my father was never born an Alpha. He rose. He proved himself. Calm in danger, braver than any of his peers. Any Shadowlands Alpha should follow the same route. I haven't. I've made it this far by the skin of my teeth. So I want you all to endorse and support and give your backing to Finn. Alpha Finn Penkov and his Luna, Naomi Kharkov of the Shadowlands.” The only person to make a sound is Rami, who starts clapping wildly and shouting “KING FINN! King Finn and Prince Rami! Haha, I'm in charge!!” He doesn’t seem to realise everyone else is in complete shock. He’s just thrilled his favourite person in the world is getting a promotion. And by default, in his eyes anyway, himself. “Do you accept?” Cillian says, not really givin
Resisting the Beta 44. Phoebe
The truck ride certainly gave me time to think. For one, I am eternally grateful Huli was no longer with me. I don’t miss having a wolf. The agony she would have been putting me through had she still held residence in my consciousness made me instinctively reach for my wrist. The only sign of that former life, one that could be years ago instead of just a few months, is a faint, grey scar on my wrist. It used to be so red and angry. Now, it has settled down to almost nothing. Genevieve picked up on it whilst she came to say goodbye. “I know you’re scared.” “I am. But only because it’s what I deserve.” “Well, if it helps, Nikolai and I are attending this meeting too. Cillian has asked for Rising Star as well.” "Oh." That absolutely does not help in any way. It only means Matilda will have even less influence. It makes me think Cillian is preparing to make an example of me. Genevieve has been kind enough to lend me a cornflower blue and white gown. Its swirling blue remi
Resisting the Beta 43. Sawyer
Nikolai explained, in a much more brutal and dickish way than was necessary, that we only got one night's stay at White Forest Castle. After all, he has sworn to help Alpha Cillian and Zeke, the pair of them bound in a trio of voting and veto. I don't care. We have each other right now. Every day seems to be swinging us to the extremes, and now we are just waiting for the biggest and hopefully final one to go our way. “I think we need to switch our brains off for a while,” Phoebe sighed, our brown dust-covered bodies flopping onto the bed of our small little room. “I can’t keep thinking about next week. It will drive me insane.” “Cillian could just exile us. Or maybe be so taken up in making Heath pay that we are nothing to him. Matilda will have an influence.” “I killed my mother and put him, Naomi and Finn into a trance. I stole a child…” “Not you. Your fucking wolf. You were just the vessel,” I sigh, too weary to go round the grisly roulette wheel. Phoebe rolls herself
Resisting the Beta 42. Phoebe
Clutching his silver goblet, our nameless, very-well rested hostage was almost chirpy, insisting he had a brother in law in the next town he could call on for a ride. But Sawyer shook his head when the time came to abandon him in the dark. “No…no it’s not right to take this. Can you drop us at the border? Keep the truck.” “From here, your nearest pack is Rising Star?” “That works just fine,” Sawyer replied. Walking through the night, keeping away from the towns and villages, Sawyer found us fresh water to drink, before killing and cooking a fish over a small fire. I’m probably endlessly naive, but to me, it was a perfect night. Because finally, there was not a single obstruction to just being with Sawyer. The man who patiently explained how you can catch a fish bare-handed. Explaining why he purposely ignored one section of the river, walking another mile upstream. I said nothing when he stripped to his underwear to stand in the shallows. I whooped and laughed instead when
Resisting the Beta 41. Sawyer
I felt Phoebe’s fear rise at the sight of Cillian. I saw a chance. Our opportunity to finally put things right. I just need him to listen to me instead of immediately heading to decapitation. His wolf's eyes were entirely golden, burning anger at the forefront of his intent. Cillian didn't even attempt diplomacy. No Shadowland envoys to King Heath, not even a personal visit to Bridgend to ask if there was truth in any rumours. He’s ended up straight here, shifted into wolf form, and shredded his way through at least twenty human men. What if this isn't the first prison he's tried? What will be the fallout from the Alpha's desperation? I couldn’t get Matilda’s cell unlocked in time. The heavy collection of black and silver keys was impossible to gauge. With the gag still in her mouth, Matilda wasn’t coming to our aid anytime soon. Plus, I know how it feels to be obliterated by wolfsbane. Sluggish, dopey. She might not even believe this is even real if they’ve really pum
