Chapter 20

Xander's POV

Maybe I should not stare at Allison Carter this way. She's smiling so brightly and in such an unguarded way that it somehow feels like cheating to watch her like this. But she's right here beside me, acting so delighted about something as small as a car ride around the city. Her eyes are closed, her head thrown back and her sun-kissed blonde hair dancing around her face. With this sight filling my senses, the most ridiculous thought blooms in my mind.

Damn, I think, Allison Carter is beautiful.

I've always known that Allison is beautiful, even if she kept it hidden under the shabby fashion and her meek manner. But here, it feels like she has tossed everything that held her down aside. She looks so unburdened, so free.

So beautiful. 

It's like she's radiating some sort of light. 

I've never seen her like this before. She looks younger and fresher.

Suddenly she opens her eyes and looks at me, clearly confused to have found me staring.

"Mr. Black?" she says.

I blink, turning away from her. I can't believe I let her see me staring like that. I can only imagine what my expression looked like as I stared at her. What is it about this woman that has been making me do strange things today? It hardly makes sense, and yet I know there is a lot more I would do just to watch her face light up, to watch that pure joy fill her expression.

"Rides make you really happy, don't they?" I say.

She beams, as if I've just given her a Christmas present.

"Yes," she replies happily, "they really do."

That smile is like a drug. Now that I've done it once, I want to make her smile again and again. It's a strange feeling, yet I know that I've never wanted anything else more.

"Then," I say before I can stop myself, "let's do this more often."

Allison stares at me, stunned. She has been doing this all day, as if she can't understand how anybody could possibly care about her happiness. Or, more likely, how I could possibly care about her happiness. Not that I blame her. I haven't exactly been her biggest cheerleader.

Usually, she doesn't look at my face, not even when she's speaking to me. But right now she's surprised enough to look, and her eyes search my face for whatever could prove that I'm playing a prank on her.

I'm guessing she doesn't find any, because she drops her gaze and speaks in a low voice.

"Thank you, Mr. Black."

And there, unfortunately, is the Allison I have to see every day. The one that keeps trying to make herself small enough to disappear. I don't have any idea how to get through to her when she withdraws into herself like this. On impulse, I say:

"You could call me Xander."

Allison's eyes widen and she gapes at me as if I'm pulling her legs. I don't think she remembers that she has already called me that once. When that lowlife tried to take her away back at the noodle shop, she had called out my name. I had only stepped out for a bit, only to come back and meet that scene, and I can't explain the rage that had bubbled to life within me in that moment. I had wanted to rip that man apart for daring to lay his filthy hands on her. But ripping people up doesn't exactly seem like the sort of thing that should be done during a date, I suppose.

"Mr. Black," Allison is saying, "you're my boss, and my Alpha. I can't… it's not proper—"

"Of course it's not proper," I reply. "I'm not expecting you to drop all honorifics while addressing me."

I haven't lost my mind to that extent yet, I think.

"Just while we're alone together," I continue. "It doesn't feel much like a date when you keep addressing me like that."

"I don't mind," she says, shaking her head.

"I do," I reply.

I didn't realize it before, but now I know that I want her to have a dating experience as real as possible. This won't be our last date, and taking her out would be pointless if she can't even relax around me. 

"Try it," I urge.

Allison stares at me for a moment longer, then gulps.

"Xan…" she begins, her lips silently shaping my name first.

The effort seems to be taking her all her strength. She wasn't this nervous when she had to debug the system.

She bites her lip, and I have to look away.

It's either that or wrap my arms around her and seal those plump lips with mine.

"Xander," she whispers.

I can't explain the shiver of pleasure that goes through me when I hear her say my name in that soft voice.

It's official, I think with a sigh, I'm in dire need of mental help.

It takes me a few seconds to regain control of my expression, and I turn to her with a faint smile.

"You see?" I say. "It wasn't that hard, was it?"

Her only response is a slight nod. She looks like she's going to say something else, but something outside catches her attention, and soon her face is practically pressed to the glass. I look over to see what has her so fascinated, and it turns out to be a fountain in the middle of a park.

I can't help the huff of laughter that escapes my lips.

A fountain. Of course she would stare at one like it's the moon goddess that has appeared. This is Allison, after all.

A rush of fondness fills me at that thought.

"Do you want us to stop at that park?" I ask.

She quickly turns to me, her smile bright as sunlight, her eyes wide and sparkling.

"Really?" she asks.

"Of course," I reply.

"Yes, please!" she squeals.

She's out of the car the moment it rolls to a stop at the park, running towards the fountain. For the next half hour, I watch her stand before the fountain with her eyes closed and her face lifted towards the spray. The wind blows her silky hair back and makes the hem of her pink dress flutter around her calves.

I think I could have watched her forever.