Chapter 2

#MTDC02: THE CONFRONTATION

Few weeks after that incident, I decided to continue living as if nothing happened. Thinking about it really frustrates me, so I always busy myself to forget about it. Malapit na ang eleksyon at abala na sina Mama at Papa sa pangangampanya. Because of that, sa akin muna ipinamahala ni Papa ang kumpanya kaya mas naging abala pa ako. My father’s term as the governor is about to end and he’s now running for the position of a congressman. I thought he’s done doing politics pero hindi pa pala. Hanggang ngayon ay hindi ko pa rin alam kung paano niya napapagsabay ang pulitika at ang kumpanya. Thinking that the company alone is draining me. Well, maybe there’s no word such as ‘tired’ to a person who craves for power.

Simula nung party ay hindi ko na ulit nakita si Red. I also avoided listening to their band’s music, as I always feel guilty about what happened, whenever I hear his voice. Ever since that day, I curse all the liquors on earth! Pinapangako kong hinding-hindi na talaga ako iinom pa ng alak!

Napahawak ako sa ulo ko nang biglang umikot na naman ang paningin ko.

“Miss Del Martin, ayos lang po ba kayo?” tanong ng empleyado na kasabay ko sa elevator.

“Oo, medyo nahihilo lang,” sagot ko at pilit na inaayos ang pagkakatayo.

Simula noong nakaraang araw ay lagi na lang akong nakakaramdam ng pagkahilo. It’s maybe because I always forget my meal for the reason that I am too busy managing this company. Naninibago ako sa responsibilidad na iniwan ni Papa sa ‘kin.

Pagkarating ko sa opisina ay agad akong binati ng sekretarya ko pero agad na kumunot ang noo ko nang malanghap ang amoy ng air freshener.

“Leila, hindi ba’t sinabi ko sa ‘yo kahapon na palitan mo ang air freshener dito? Nakakasuka ang amoy!” singhal ko at padabog na umupo sa swivel chair. Tinakpan ko ang ilong ko habang tinitingnan siya ng masama.

“Ma’am, sorry po. Magpapabili na po ako ng bago ngayon na.” Agad siyang lumabas ng opisina.

Inilabas ko ang perfume ko at halos ubusin ko na ito para lang mawala ang amoy ng air freshener. Pero habang ini-i-spray ko ito ay bigla na lang akong natigilan.

Kailan ko pa hindi nagustuhan ang lavender scent ng air freshener ko? It used to be my favorite scent. What’s wrong with me?

Kunot-noo kong tiningnan ang maliit na kalendaryo sa gilid ng mesa ko at naalalang hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa ako dinadatnan. I have irregular period kaya hindi na ako nagtakang hindi ako dinatnan noong nakaraang buwan. Pero patapos na ang March at hindi pa rin ako nireregla. Biglang gumapang ang kaba sa d****b ko nang maalala ang nangyari nung gabing ‘yun.

I gasped when I realized something.

“Oh my god!” My heart started beating erratically.

Dahil sa naisip ay nagmamadali akong bumaba at lumabas ng gusali at tinungo ang pinakamalapit na pharmacy. I bought five pregnancy test kits just to make sure that it won’t fail. Pagkatapos ay agad akong bumalik sa opisina. My secretary was telling something, but I was too anxious to entertain her. Dali-dali akong pumasok sa banyo at sabay-sabay na ginamit ang mga PTs.

While waiting, I am praying to God that these PTs will give me negative results. But minutes later, when I checked all of them, my breathing hitched when I saw the results. The five PTs that I use gave me the same results of two red lines. I feel like my world is about to end.

Goodness! What am I going to do now?

I almost lose my balance as the realization slowly sinks in to me.

I'm pregnant...

"N-no. No, Symp. These PTs were wrong. Mali ang resulta na nakita mo. Calm y-yourself down. P-please, calm down," pilit kong sinasabi sa sarili habang nakaharap sa salamin.

I should go to my OB para makasiguro. That is the best thing to do just to end this whole shit.

Napalingon ako sa nakasarang pinto nang marinig ko ang marahang katok ni Leila.

"Miss Symphony, pinapatawag na po kayo sa conference room. Magsisimula na raw po ang board meeting."

I cleared my throat, before I answered, "O-Oo. Just a minute!"

Dali-dali kong inilagay ang mga pregnancy tests sa supot na pinaglagyan nito at ilang beses akong nagpakawala ng malalim na paghinga para pakalmahin ang sarili.

My heart is still thumping vigorously, but I need to act like I'm fine. I should act like nothing happened. Haharap ako sa mga importanteng tao sa kompanya kaya kailangan kong ayusin ang sarili ko.

With one last glance in the mirror, I went outside and grabbed my handbag. Doon ko inilagay ang supot na laman ang mga PTs. I walk my way to the conference room with grace as if everything's fine. Our employees greeted me in the hallway and I gave them small smiles.

Pagpasok ko pa lang ay agad nang bumungad sa mga mata ko si Papa na ngayon ay nakaupo na sa pwesto niya. His mere presence made me froze. My heart doubled its speed, while I can feel my hands and knees are starting to tremble again.

Bakit siya nandito? Akala ko ba abala siya sa pangangampanya?

He smiled at me which brought me back to my senses.

'Oh, God! Symphony, don't be too paranoid! Wala namang may alam! Tsaka hindi pa naman talaga sigurado! Kumalma ka!' Ilang ulit kong sinasabi sa sarili at tuluyan nang naglakad papunta sa pwesto ko.

The meeting started and the representative from the marketing department proceeded on discussing in front.

Patuloy lang sila sa kanilang diskusyon pero wala akong maintindihan. Walang ni katiting sa pinag-uusapan nila ang pumasok sa utak ko.

"Miss Del Martin, here's your coffee," sabi ng sekretarya ko na tinanguan ko lang.

The board's discussion went on and still, I'm out of focus. It's actually a good thing that my father is here to do my job. When the meeting finally ended, sumabay sa 'kin palabas si Papa.

"What are your thoughts about Mr. Abarquez' suggestion, hija?"

"P-Po?" I am fidgeting my fingers, anxious that he might notice something about me.

"Kanina ko pang napapansin na wala ka sa focus. What’s wrong with you?" seryosong tanong niya.

"I-I'm sorry, Pa. May iniisip lang po ako." I gave him an apologetic smile.

Hanggang sa magtanghali na ay hindi pa rin ako mapakali. Things kept on bothering me. I asked Leila to cancel all my meeting this afternoon. Hindi na ako kumain ng tanghalian at dumiretso na sa ospital.

"What's with the sudden visit, Symphony?" Dr. Floresca asked me. She’s Soffi's mother and also my OB.

"Tita, I want to know the truth. It's really making me anxious," saad ko na nagpakunot sa noo niya.  "I need to know if I'm pregnant or not."

Pansin ko ang saglit na pagkagulat sa mga mata niya pero hindi rin nagtagal ay isinagawa niya na ang mga test sa 'kin para masagot ang katanungan ko. She's talking to me and asking me about morning sickness and other signs of pregnancy which I answered with whole honesty. Wala pa siyang ibang sinasabi o kinukumpirma kaya halos lumabas na ang puso ko dahil sa sobrang kaba.

Matapos ang halos tatlumpung minuto ng paghihintay ay nakumpirma na nga ang kinatatakutan ko.

"Symphony, hija, you're five weeks pregnant." Her words made me shattered. It echoes in my head again and again, and it’s continuously breaking me.

I wanted to cry, but I suppressed myself from shedding tears.

Hanggang sa makauwi ako ay ang kumpirmasyon lang na 'yun ang paulit-ulit na tumatakbo sa isip ko. I already told Dr. Floresca to not tell anyone about my pregnancy not even to my friend, Soffi. Good thing she agreed and promise that my secret is safe with her.

Nagkulong ako sa kwarto at doon ko ibinuhos lahat ng takot at pangamba ko. I cried and cried until I realized that I should inform Wesley about this. I immediately browsed my I*******m and sent him a message asking if we could talk in person. I waited for hours before I received his response.

WesleyB: I thought we made it clear to just forget about what happened between us?

SDMartin: We have a very important matter to talk to. Please, just cooperate.

WesleyB: Just go straight to the point, Symphony. May gusto ka ba sa ‘kin?

I almost threw my phone after reading his response. What the hell is this jerk talking about? Hindi ba siya kinikilabutan sa sinabi niya? Goodness!

SDMartin: Dream on!

Ilang minuto akong naghintay ng sunod niyang reply.

WesleyB: Meet me at Café Locca, 7pm sharp.

I rolled my eyes. He’s so bossy! Nakakainis!

Bumusangot ulit ako nang makitang lagpas alas sais na. Hindi na ako nag-abalang mag-reply at nagmamadali nang magbihis. I didn't even bothered covering my swollen eyes. He's not worth the preparation, though! Matapos kong mag-ayos ay agad ko nang pinuntahan ang lugar na sinabi niya.

Saglit na nawala ang pagkainis ko kay Wesley nang makitang sobrang ganda ng café na napili niya. It's not that huge, but it's cozy and it has a calming vibe. Well, I must admit that he has a good taste for picking such this place, but still, he's a jerk!

Napairap ako nang makita siyang prenteng nakaupo sa may 'di kalayuan. He's looking like a boss waiting for his servant. And the servant? Of course that wasn't me!

Ilang beses kong kinalma ang sarili bago tuluyang lumapit sa kaniya. He raised a brow the second he noticed my presence. Bakit ba sobrang init ng dugo ko sa lalaking 'to? Is this because of the thought that he got me pregnant? 

"What are we gonna talk about, Miss Symphony?" he bluntly asked, not even giving a damn if I'm already comfortable with my seat or not. Asshole!

"I'm pregnant," diretsahan ko ring saad.

Tumaas ulit ang kilay niya sa 'kin bago ko unti-unting narinig ang pinaka-nakakabwisit na tawang narinig ko sa buong buhay ko.

"Come again?" he asked with a mocking grin.

Nagpakawala ako ng malalim na hininga bago seryosong nagsalita, "Binuntis mo ako."

Ilang sandali niya akong tinitigan bago siya ulit tumawa ng nakaloloko.

"Do you think I will buy that shit of yours, Del Martin? Is it really me, or my cousin? Baka nagkakamali ka lang. Or maybe you slept with another random guy again and you’re just confused–" hindi ko na siya pinatapos at isinaboy sa mukha niya ang isang baso na puno ng malamig na tubig.

"Do you think I'm a whore? A slut? A pushover? Really, Wesley?" My voice is getting louder, but the hell I care! This devil in front of me is making me mad! "You know what? You're the worst person I've ever encountered in my whole life! You're a jerk! Bakit ba hindi ko naisip na hindi mo aangkinin ang pagkakamali mo? Ha! Talking to you was a very wrong move! Even thinking that I once slept with an asshole like you disgusts me!"

“Tone down your voice, Del Martin, kung ayaw mong mapahiya.”Agad kong inilibot ang paningin sa paligid at napagtanto na marami-rami na ang nakatingin sa amin. “Now, did I heard it right? Pagkakamali ko? Hindi ba’t ikaw ang biglang pumasok sa kwarto at ibinigay ang sarili sa ‘kin? Well, okay, let’s say that I am also at fault. Pero alam ko naman na nasarapan ka rin sa pagkakamali na ‘yun, ‘di ba?”

Umawang ang mga labi ko dahil sa narinig. “W-What? You’re impossible! How could you take this situation as if it was nothing serious, huh? Hindi mo ba naiisip na hindi lang tayo ang maaapektuhan sa problemang ‘to?”

Biglang sumeryoso ang titig niya sa ‘kin. For the first time today, I saw his bothered reaction. “Abort that child,” walang pakundangan niyang saad.

It took me almost a minute to process what he have said. His voice echoed in my head like a broken record until I got sick of listening to it. Naramdaman ko na lang pagkawala ng saganang luha sa mga mata ko habang walang kurap na nakatitig lang sa kaniya.

“I-I know this is a huge problem pero ni minsan ay wala sa pagpipilian ko ang patayin ang anak ko. Paano mo ‘yan nasasabi sa sarili mong anak? Y-You’re heartless. Are you even human?”

I let my tears flow while my heart is slowly breaking into pieces. Nasasaktan ako para sa batang nasa loob ko. His own father is telling me to kill him. But I can’t do that! Hindi kakayanin ng konsensya ko ang gusto niyang mangyari!

“Fine! Hindi ko ipipilit na angkinin mo ang batang dinadala ko. Simula pa noong una, alam ko nang walang magandang maidudulot ang kausapin ka. Ang tanga ko para isipin na kaya mong panindigan ang aksidenteng nabuo natin.”

I gave him glares full of disappointed and disgust. Padabog akong tumayo mula sa kinauupuan at walang paalam na tinalikuran siya. Pero nang sandaling mag-angat ako ng tingin, para akong tinakasan ng hangin sa katawan nang makita si Red sa harapan ko.

“Y-You’re pregnant?”

“Red… w-what are you doing here?” My heart is about to jump out from my chest. I’m having a hard time breathing. Lumingon ako kay Wesley na gulat rin ang ekspresyon.

“I-Is it Wesley?”

I gulped trying to get rid of the lump in my throat.

“I… I-I’m sorry…”

“Hey, can you continue walking outside?” sabi ni Wesley. I gasped when Red held my wrist then dragged me out off the cafe. Tsaka niya lang ako binitawan nung nasa parking lot na kami.

“Are you really pregnant?” A tear escaped from my eye when I nodded. “B-Bakit? Sa lahat ng tao, bakit pinsan ko pa?”

“I’m sorry, Red. Believe me, that was just an accident. Hindi namin sinasadya,” I sobbed. I saw the pain pass through his eyes.

“Alam mo ba kung bakit kita hiniwalayan noon? Because your father told me that I was not good enough for you. That I’m not worthy for you. Kaya simula noon, pilit kong inaangat ang sarili ko para kapag binalikan kita, masasabi na ng tatay mo na pwede na ako para sa ‘yo. Pero Symphony, ano ‘to? Bakit ganito?”

I fell on my knees. I kept on asking forgiveness.

“Akala ko kapag napatunayan ko na ang sarili ko sa tatay mo, pwede na tayo. Pero mukhang hindi na pala.”

I begged for him to stay, to listen to my explanation. But he didn’t. Nagpatuloy lang siya sa paglalakad palayo sa ‘kin habang patuloy pa rin sa pagbuhos ang mga luha ko.

“What a sad story.”

Binalingan ko ng tingin si Wesley na mukhang kanina pa palang nakikinig sa amin. Gamit ang natitira kong lakas, tumayo ako at binigyan siya ng malakas na sampal. His face tilted to the side. I know it hurts him enough, as my palm was starting to feel numb. His jaw flinched when he looked back at me.

“Carrying your child inside my womb disgusts the hell out of me. You want me to abort this? Fine! I wil give you what you want. I’ll kill this child.”