CHAPTER 4

ELIZABETH’S POV

Medyo napatalon ako sa gulat nang mag-ring iyong phone ko. Napapikit ako, memories are still haunting me. It still feels like yesterday. Everything is still very clear. Umiling-iling ako. I picked my phone and answered the call. 

"How are you, Eliza? You are not replying to my messages. You’re still a brat!" Kuya Mike said, my cousin. He is Tita Leah’s son, kapatid ni Mommy. He's the only person that I can talk without any pretentions, besides my manager. Well, I am not pretending though.

"Kuya! I am here already. I'm nervous. It's normal, right? I mean, I'm good already and it's been six f*cking years. I should… be okay." 

I don't know kung sa kanya ko ba sinasabi or para iyon sa sarili ko. Bulls! It’s like I just want to back off or get sick all of a sudden. I am very nervous. I haven’t seen them for six years, what if bumalik lahat? Lahat nang pinaghirapan ko? Oh my god, Eliza! I thought you’re okay na? Come on, self! Get a grip. You are now controlled and reserved. 

"Hey? Did you drive, alone?” 

“Y─yeah. I am fine kuya. I got this, okay?”

“Do you want me to come? Or do you want me to fetch you? I can clear my schedule." I know he will do that. Tsk. Of course, ayokong maka-abala. I've been abala him for some long years. I refused and ended the call. Geez! Why am I even nervous? Acting is my profession! I'm Eliza Javier, the best actress for more than four years. Madali na lang ito.  

Tinignan ko ulit itsura ko sa salamin. Malayong-malayo sa Eli, six years ago. Hinawakan ko ang kwintas sa leeg ko. This helps me calm in every situation. I took my bag and got out of my car. Smile Elizabeth. You can do it! Maglalakad na sana ako nang mag-ring na naman phone ko. People, calm down! It's Jai! 

"Yes. I am already here. Can you fetch me here outside?" I heard her scream as well as the messy noisy background. After a minute, nakita ko rin siya. She’s wearing a bikini covered with a pareo wrapped around her waist and tied as a skirt. She's smiling widely. Lumapit ako sa kanya and gave her a kiss and hug. 

"Omg! Omg! You are really here! I missed you so much! The great actress Eliza Javier is here! Baka maraming magpa-autograph or magpa-picture sa iyo dyan ha!" She pulled me into her house. We went through their living area and there I saw the maids waiting, she gave them my stuff. 

“Pakilagay na lang po sa room ko manang. Thank you!” sabi niya sa maid nila. 

"Are you sure you're gonna be okay? Okay lang ba sa manager mo? The last time I checked, she was so strict!" Matagal na kasi niya akong ini-invite rito sa Pilipinas pero laging si Yna ang nakakausap niya and yeah, hindi pumapayag si Yna not until this time.

"I can manage. Don't worry." Ako na ang humila sa kanya papunta sa pool. Well, I just followed the noises around. The first thing I notice is the color of the pool which is blue and clean as crystal─ it is so soothing in the eyes. The place is busy and crowded with visitors. They all turned to me. Yes, when I say all, as in, all! I was a little lost but I just ignored it. I am so used of attention and crowd. Thanks to my profession. 

My freaking eyes noticed him immediately but I also avoided him immediately so that he would not notice. I smirk. Good for them. Tsk. There were those people who shouted and yelled my name. I just waved at some people I used to know. I get a drink from the waiter and I still notice their eyes on me, the others still can’t believe it. I saw a buffet so I went straight there, nagutom tuloy ako bigla! I don't hella care about them. 

I can’t choose between foods, everything is delicious! I am also not picky about food because I work out, part of my job, though. Sh*t! there's just many, I can't choose. I really can’t choose or maybe I just missed Filipino foods so much? My cousin, Kuya Mike also cooks for me but it’s really different when it is cooked professionally. Don’t get me wrong, Kuya Mike’s luto was good. Why am I so madaldal?!

"Welcome back.” I jumped a bit when someone spoke next to me. I did not even notice! I don’t know if I will answer him or even look around him but… fine! I don't want to be rude. 

"Thank you, Josh." I smiled at him. I just picked some chicken adobo na lang. I sip at my glass─it’s a watermelon-tequila cocktail. 

“Ayon oh! Atay ng manok. It’s your favorite, right?” He pointed out the atay ng manok. Nope, not anymore. It’s true, hindi na talaga ako kumakain ng atay ng manok. 

As most people say, people change.

“Thank you but I’m good,” I said politely. Hoping na sana hindi na siya magsalita or magtanong pa kasi it’s so awkward at baka mamaya or bukas nasa buong tabloid na mukha ko kasama itong lalaking ito. No way! I promised my manager not to do anything stupid. 

"You weren't busy?" Oh good Lord! Can he please stop talking to me? He is one of those people I don’t want to talk to. Hindi naman sa galit ako or something. Nahihiya lang ako. Hindi naman na ako galit sa kahit kanino. I moved on and forgive them and myself. I slowly turned to him. This is so awkward. Nginitian ko siya ng pilit na pilit. 

"Nope, sige. Upo na ako." At saka ko siya tinalikuran. That's really awkward! We weren't really that close, we were just talking back then casually. I don’t know, I used to feel like he was mad at me kasi para siyang laging iwas or something. Jai waves her hand to sit next to her. Since, she’s just the person I am most comfortable with right now. I started eating while some people’s eyes were still focused on me. I am not really sure kung walang paparazzi dito pero kung mayro’n man, good news Philippines! The great Eliza Javier is back! I arrived here in the Philippines privately, no paparazzis and reporters. Ugh, peace! 

"Hey Eli─Eliza! Aren't you gonna wear two piece sh*ts?" Jai asked. She's a bit tipsy na. Typical Jai. She was still easily drunk. Let me eat muna, please. I haven’t finished eating. 

"I will just finish this and change or remove this thing," sabi ko sabay turo sa suot ko. Napatango-tango siya. Mga ibang kasama namin dito sa table hindi maitago ang paghanga sa akin. Ngini-ngitian ko lang din sila at nakikitawa or nakikisama minsan sa usap nila. I cleared my schedule for today, for these. 

"You're really intimidating Eli. The famous Eliza Javier are here with us. Your last movie was good ha," sabi ng isang ka-table namin. Eli ha, I am not used with that name anymore.  Intimidating? Me? I don’t think so. My last movie was a love story and a little bit action. That was almost two months ago but still airing nationwide. 

"Thank you! And anyway, don’t be intimidated just enjoy the night!" sabi ko na lang. I smiled at them sweetly. I asked Jai where the comfort room was and thanked God she answered me directly and properly.

Nakapag-ayos na ako. I viewed myself in the mirror, retouching. Nang biglang may pumasok. I smiled at her in the mirror. I was about to leave when I felt her hold my hand. I slowly looked at our hand. 

"I missed you." I looked at her. I smiled and hug her. She seemed surprised at what I did and didn’t react right away. 

"I missed you too, Tine." I let go of the hug and went out first.  

Sure. I am the type of person that can easily forgive, but never forgets. Pero hindi naman na ako galit. I'm doing good. I'm happy. I'm fine. 

Ayon na naman ang mga tingin nila. I can easily describe their look. Besides of being an actress nagmo-model din ako ng mga magazines, two piece sh*ts and bikinis. 

I even saw him staring at me. I smiled at them at hinila ko si Jai sa akin.  

"Ay sh*t ang hot ng bestfriend ko!" sigaw ni Jai. Bestfriend, is it still? Anyways, hinayaan ko na lang. I don't want to sound bitter. I've been through a lot and ayoko ng mag-isip pa ng kung ano-ano.  

Iyong iba nakapag-adjust na yata sa presensiya ko or dahil tipsy and drunk lang sila? Either way, I'm glad about it. Nagiging wild na rin iyong iba. I am controlling my shots because I’m still going to drive home.

"Loosen up Eli! Dito ka matutulog. Duh! You owe me lot," sabi ni Jai na lasing na. Did she read my mind? Fine! Hindi na ako uuwi but I'll still control my drink. I need to take care of her. Geez!

I can still feel his stare. I smiled at him naman kanina. Tsk. Buti nga hindi kami inaasar or baka nasabihan sila, una pa lang? Or baka nandito ‘yong bago niya? Good for them. 

When I went up to the pool, Jai called me I mean, us, including Tine. She pulled us inside their house up to her room.

"Careful Jai." I was holding her hand because she was already falling a little while walking. She's really drunk! Tine is quiet and not talking, she also supports Jai on the other hand.  

Jai sat on her bed for a moment and then got up and entered another room, must be her closet. When she returned, she was already carrying two wrapped gifts.

"Oh para sa inyo iyan. I’ve done that, a long time ago, open it." She handed us the gift she was holding. She sat down on the bed again, lay down and got up again to go to her comfort room that was here inside her room. She is still very naughty when drunk. 

"Geez! Jai didn't change a bit. Weak pa rin sa alak tapos ang likot," I said as I opened the gift. Did I say that out loud? Well, I was talking to myself. 

I unwrapped it and saw a scrapbook. Entitled ‘For Keeps’. Sh*t. 

I heard a sob. I refused to look at her. No. I will not cry. I am so done with that. Naubos na. 

I opened the scrapbook and saw our pictures together. 

Smiling happily and sweetly.

We were the happiest.

"E─Eli, I’m so─sorry," she said between her sobs.

It's okay. I mean, it was not okay but it's done. I look at Tine. She's crying. Nakayuko siya at gumagalaw pa ang dalawang balikat niya. Dahan-dahan siyang tumingin sa akin. I smiled at her. I don’t feel anything right now maybe because I have forgiven her a long time ago. I was mad and hurt, of course! I am no saint… but eventually I accepted it and moved on. People make mistakes. People learn and people change. 

"I’m sorry Eli. I know this is six f*cking years late but I never had a day thinking about what I did, how sorry I am, until now. Ka─kaya naiintindihan ko kung gali─"

"I was mad. I was hurt. Yes, but I moved on. I forgave you already kahit ngayon ko pa lang maririnig iyang sorry mo. Tine, I don't need explanations anymore. It was done and I already accepted it. You're not perfect, we make mistakes. Hindi na ako galit." Yes. It's true. Hindi na ako galit. Actually, I don't even know anymore. 

One day, nagising na lang ako na okay na ako, na I have to live, I need to live even if it's barely living. Natanggap ko na lang lahat bigla. I needed to be strong to live. I smiled at her again. 

Pero I can't promise na ganoon parin tayo katulad ng dati.