43. How I Died

I had found a Guardian. After all this time, I had finally found a Guardian. Alex had finally agreed, and now he was staying at the Guardian's Mansion, at least that's what I like to call it, but, there was still a huge problem.

Alex was still a pain in the ass.

I had told him that I would show him to his room, which he had agreed to- at first, but once we had reached the above floor, Alex decided that it was time he returned back to his sassy attitude.

So when I showed him the room I chose for him, which was beside my own room, he had declined.

Why? Don't ask. I had no idea either.

The room I had chosen for him was just like mine, too huge to be called a house itself. I wanted him to have that room despite his terrible attitude was because he was the first Guardian I ever found. It was just like my room, with a different color choice.

But of course he didn't take it. I had a feeling that he didn't choose it because I was going to be his neighbour in this whole huge house. He regected it just when I mentioned I was in the next door.

Seriously, did he hate me so much?

At long last, he chose a room on the third floor, on top of me. Trust me when I say, it took him a whole hour to choose a room and another hour to tour the whole house. I wouldn't care, it's just that I had to tag along, just in case the guy got lost.

Thankfully, he never did.

Dawn had already started to peak out, a thin thread of sunlight glistening from the blankets of clouds. I was dead tired, and needed to sleep. I'm sure Jason and Julia were already asleep. But Alex? I had no idea. Had to check on the guy.

I dried my hairs before changing into black silk pajamas and tying my hairs up in a messy bun. Looking at myself in the mirror, I looked like an illusion. My hairs had gotten darker and lips even more red. My eyes had a little tint of orange in the dark pool of red. I was guessing it was from the fire of Hell, that was slowly consuming me. My skin looked paler than before.

I turned away from the mirror, making my way towards the door before Tan came to stand in front of me.

"What is it Tan?" I asked softly, scratching his chin. Tan purred in response, pointing his paw towards the door before looking at me with doe eyes.

"You want to go out too?" Tan closed his eyes for a brief second before opening them again as if to say yes.

I smiled slyly, tilting my head to the side. "Are you that eager to meet the new Guardian?"

Tan's eyes twinkled with excitement, making me laugh.

"Alright. You can come with me. But mind you, the boy can be really disturbing. Don't whine to me later."

Tan didn't take much from my threat, instead he jogged his way to the third floor once I opened our chamber doors.

Imagine a tiger jogging.

The lamps and torches were now alluminated in the third floor, considering that it was inhabitated by someone now. Royal blue carpets lined the whole passage with golden borders on the edges. This whole mansion screamed royalty. The ground floor is draped in emerald velvet, the first in ruby velvet, the second, which happens to be mine, in violet and now the third, royal blue. I didn't bother to remember what the other floors were like.

Tan had already reached Alex's door by the time I was half way there. He sniffed the door, trying to get a single sniff of Alex. All I could do was laugh.

I didn't know why he was so excited to see him.

"There there, don't do that once you enter. Your kind are really feared by humans. It will freak him out."

Tan did seem to take my word seriously once again, wagging his tail like a dog. But he didn't sniff anymore. His eyes turned cold and his body stilled. I knew that posture. Tan was trying to put on his serious face, the one he does at formal meetings, the one he had when we first met.

All I wanted to do was just coo at a tiger's cuteness. He was just too adorable!

I stiffled a laugh before swinging the door open. Alex's room was smaller than mine, but still huge, like the rooms you can expect in a mansion. Instead of velvet, grey silk adorned the room with black in places of curtains and cusions. The bed was black oak wood, with black silk bedsheets and pillows and silver blankets and cool pillows. The whole room screamed royalty, just like the house.

"Alex?" I called out, but no response. He wasn't in bed, which meant he wasn't sleeping. Just when I was about to call him again, the bathroom door swung open, revealing a half naked Alex, with just a towel tied around the waist. He didn't see me yet, or he wouldn't have been so composed and rubbing his wet purple hairs in a towel.

I turned my face away, trying my best to stop my face from getting flushed.

"Put on some cloths if you don't want to catch a cold." I said calmly, inspecting the draperies where as Alex had released girlish yelp and was shooting daggers at me.

"What the frack are you doing in my room?" Alex screamed, not making any move to put on some cloths. I however remained calm.

"If your wardrobe choise is too difficult than I guess I should do the choosing. I don't need a sick guardian." I didn't bother answering Alex's question, after all, this was likely my house now, he didn't do the questioning.

Alex fumed, but reluctently went to put on some cloths that Jonghyun had bought when we were touring. Once he was dressed in silk blue pajamas, I finally faced him.

"How does Jason know my size so well? It fits perfectly." Alex said before jumping on his fluffy bed and lying there sprawled, as if I wasn't even in the room. I didn't complain, but just walked around the room with my hands folden behind me.

"I'm glad you are liking it." My face showed no hint that I was actually glad. But Alex didn't even notice it. Instead, he sighed.

"Damn! This feels like royalty!! It feels so good to take a shower and wear cloths after so long!! I would have died earlier if I knew I would get a life like this!" Alex exclaimed and I had a huge urge to punch him for taking everything for granted.

"Not every death promises this luxury. And besides, you have to pay a prize for that." I said darkly, not bothering to not sound rude at all.

"Prize? What kind?" Alex asked with his eyebrows knitted together.

"You will see...soon enough." Was all I said.

Alex's immortal transformation had started and unlike mine, it was taking longer than expected. I was condemed by a Grim Reaper which must have sped the proccess, but a Guardian condemning another Guardian takes it's time. Like right now.

Alex could feel things again, He could shower or sleep as well. But his eating disorders still remained. It will be a while until they all return to normal.

But unlike me, Alex had another advantage. Unlike Heathens, Sav7 would know about him, talk to him, see him if he wanted to be seen. The only thing that remained same was that no one else in this world would see him as long as he didn't want to. And yes, the world would forgot him too.

Alex didn't seem bothered by that at all, as if getting wiped out of existence was something that happens to you every time. The boy was just so weird. I couldn't understand him.

Alex frowned from his bed before shrugging off the matter and deciding to go to sleep. But that didn't happen. Just when he lied down again, Tan emerged from behind the silk draperies, staring intently at Alex who released another girlish skriek, pulling his knees over his chest and shielding himself with a pillow.

"What the fuck is that!?"

"A tiger."

"Why is there a fucking tiger in my fucking room!?"

"Could you stop with the F word?"

"Is this place haunted?!"

"Yes, and you are the ghost."

"WHAT?"

Alex kept screaming as if he just realized he was dead. I walked forward until I was standing in front of Tan, scratching his large furry head who was standing beside Alex's bed, trying to get a sniff of Alex. Alex only squirmed far away, trying to shoo Tan away with a pillow.

"Hurt him and I will make sure you never see the light of the day again. I'm sure you don't want that." I said coldly as Alex tossed the pillow at Tan. With a swing of my hands, the pillow went backwards before it even touched Tan and smacked right into Alex. "Make me angry, and it will fuel his anger. And if he;s angry, he will bite your head off."

Alex looked at me in disbelieve, as if I just said the unbelievable. Well kinda.

"Wh-what's that supposed to mean? Why would y-your anger fuel-"

"He's my avatar."

"He's your what?!" Alex screamed once again bringing my urge to punch him for screaming so much.

"You heard me." Was all I said.

Alex didn't say anything for a long time, just staring at Tan before his face softened. Not like really softened, just got calm. Slowly, he regained his compsure, all the while Tan stared at him with doe eyes and Alex did the same.

Not with doe eyes of course.

"Can I...pat him?"

"Go ahead."

Alex reached out for Tan's fluffy head, his fingers slowly graising the top of Tan's head. Tan purred, bringing more confidence in Alex to start a slight patting. Eventually, I had to withdraw my hand away, for Alex was enjoying himself a lot, slowly becoming comfortable around me. Animals really do the trick.

"Now I wish I had an Avatar."

We stayed silent for a long time, watching as Tan slowly fell asleep on the rug, Alex finally dropping his hand.

"So what is this mission of yours?" Alex asked, slowly getting comfortable in his bed, before patting a spot in the edge of the bed for me to sit.

So far, that was the only thing Alex had done to welcome me in his life matters, So I complied, taking a seat.

"I already told you, you will know when we find more like us."

Alex didn't seem satisfied with the answer, bit didn't force either, instead, he chose another question.

"Okay? At least you will tell me which band you guard?"

That...I can't say either.

So I changed the topic.

"Will you tell me why you were so eager to be wiped out of existence? If I didn't know better, I would say you are trying to run from a murder you commited and now you are free because no one knows you."

Alex grimaced as if disgusted by my words but I didn't show any hint of sarcasm to let him know I was joking, for I actually wasn't.

"No Ms. Cilia Carpenter, I'm not a murderer or any such thing. It just doesn't matter to me if I remain as a once upon a time human of this world. My death is better in this world- at least that's what I think."

Wow. This guy is super crazy. He must hate mortals.

"What about your family? Your parents? Won't you miss them?" I wasn't someone to be asking that question considering how my own family disowned me the day I died. But then again, not all families are like mine right?

"No." Was Alex's curt reply. I could literally feel the coldness seeping from his words and into me.

But I didn't let go.

"Why? Don't you care about your parents? Come on, you aren't that selfish to not care for your parents atleast. As long as they are..."

I trailed off, unable to finish the sentence as the realization hit me. I couldn't bring myself to even look at him. All I could do was keep my face void of emotions as if to show I wasn't the least bothered with my own cold words.

I thought we would remain silent for the rest of the day, until Alex finally spoke up.

"I don't have parents. My memories are only that of an orphanage. I stayed there until I was fifteen, until I couldn't bear the loneliness and unfriendlyness, so I ran away and became a trainee at SilverSpoon Ent."

Oh my God.

All that coldness, that attitude, that ego and selfishness, was because of how he was shunned from the world, never excepted by anyone, not even his parents. Unless they weren't alive.

"My parents were-are still alive. The orphanage was very delighted to let me know that my parents knew of my existence but didn't want me. No one wanted me. So I decided to become the person I am today, like Julia so kindly put it, an asshole."

No you are not.

I wanted to say that, but couldn't bring the strength to. Alex's whole life had been a disaster, maybe worst than mine and I couldn't recognize someone who went through the same pain as me.

All I wanted him to know was that even if the world didn't want him, I wanted him, and I would protect him. But I could not utter a single word, So Alex continued.

"Sav7 was-is my only comfort. They were the only ones who were there for me, and even right now, they are all I have. And I'm happy to be there Guardian."

Alex's words seemed so forced as if he was in pain, but I understood that. It wasn't easy for a guy like Alex to open up to someone he just met when he had been shunned by the world all his life. I wanted to comfort him, tell him everything will be alright from now on, but I couldn't.

Not because I was displaying my cold self, but because I was being selfish.

I was dragging him to a suicide mission, and he didn't even know what it was about. And I still couldn't bring the courage to tell him about it.

Nothing was going to be alright.

So I changed the topic.

"Then h-how did you...die?" I hated it that I was stuttering, but every single word felt like swallowing lead, so it was harder to speak.

Alex frowned, looking up at the ceiling before he finally spoke.

"There was an elevator crash at Silverspoon headquaters. I was on my way to the CEO's office to explain him of a misunderstanding between us trainees, but I died before I could ever do that. The elevator fell from the eigth floor, taking eleven people with it. Me as well."

I wanted to breath, I wanted to at least gasp, but I couldn't. It felt like the air from my lungs was knocked out, as if I was experiencing Alex's death myself. My own death flashed before my eyes.

How unjustly had we both died?

"I died at the age of seventeen, the very year Sav7 debut. After I died."

I wanted to nod, but even that was not possible. Alex really looked like an idol with his purple hairs and smooth milky skin. He also wore those chain earrings that every idol wears, but nothing new in that, I wear earrings too.

But what was surprising was, we were both the same age, although I already had a feeling about that. But he died the year after my death. I died when I was sixteen.

Alex yawned, alerting me that the boy was sleepy. His whole life was a disaster, the only place were he ever found any solace was the very place he died. He deserved a comfortable sleep if not any comfortable words from me.

"Sleep." I said as I stood up. Tan stood up along with me, watching as Alex pulled the blankets over him before snuggling into sleep.

"We have a lot to do tomorrow. Take as much rest as you want."

So saying I walked to the door, opening it wider for Tan to follow out before looking back at the sleeping boy.

"I'm sorry. I will make things better for you. I promise."

And with that, I shut the door behind me.