46. I'm So Sorry

The night breeze was cool against my skin, which was getting cooler by every second as I flew the skies of New York city. I had no idea where Alex was and that was enough to send me to lose  myself.

Any time now, Alex would be done with his work, Lord only knows where and I won't be able to save him. I don't even know where he is to begin with.

All of this was my fault, bringing Alex in without proper background check. I should have been more careful. But what was done was done, there was no use crying over it now. All that mattered was that I find him and bring an end to his devilish plans. But that was the main issue here. How?

Jason had stayed behind at his work place, incase Sav7 actually ended up in there. Julia stayed behind at the mansion, keeping an eye out for any signs of Alex, incase he decided to show up. Which left me on my own device's, without any plan as to where I should begin.

"Look for Sav7 in SilverSpoon building." A very familiar female voice suggested in my head, making me feel foolish for not thinking about that sooner.

Of course, that was supposed to be the first place I should have searched, but my clouded mind had me wandering around the skies as if that could answer my unanswered questions.

"Don't blame yourself, Cilia. You are already in a lot. It's alright." Another female voice came, making me smile despite myself, but I forced no reply. Instead, I flew towards the direction of SilverSpoon Ent.

Not long after, I was face to face with the eight story building, most of the lights glistening brightly in contrast with the dark night sky. I landed gracefully on the roof top, only to find it empty.

With the remaining hope that I had left, I flew downwards before reaching the dorms of Sav7. Still, nothing. Until I had searched the whole building and had yet returned empty handed.

"They are not here." I said out loud in the air, but I knew someone was listening, at least in my head. I was starting to lose myself, starting to feel my control slipping away. I was fearing I would never find Alex and stop him in time. And he would become a Demon because of me.

"Have you checked the lower level? The parking lot? The water system? Gas system?" Came a third female voice. I looked up, my eyes going wide once again at my foolishness.

What's wrong with me? Have I been hit in the head?

Without another thought, I flew lower, deeper, until I had finally reached the basement area, which was actually the parking lot.

"Well?" Said another female voice, making me look around. Somehow, I could feel Alex here. No, I could smell him, as much as perverted that sounds.

The smell of burning wood and cinnamon wafted around, making my senses more alert. He was here, I knew that for sure. But where, that was still a mystery. All I had to do was follow the scent.

Following the scent wasn't hard, for just after rounding a corner, I saw him in the gas system area. And like expected, he wasn't alone. Tied to individual cylinders were each of the seven members of Sav7.

I had been expecting something like that, but that didn't mean I wasn't shocked. The boys were scared out of their wits, watching as a dead vengeful spirit had them under his control, little did they know that the vengful spirit was actually their former member whom they had betrayed. I wanted to speak, I wanted to at least make a noice, but my voice had disappeared. I could no longer find my voice as if it had died the moment my eyes landed on Alex.

He didn't look anything like him. Sure enough, his hairs were still silver from the time I froze them, his irises purple, his skin the same pale white. He looked the same, and yet he did not look the same.

Can you believe what I'm saying? Am I even making any sense anymore?

What I mean to say is, Alex was Alex, but the hidden monster in him was now on the surface. His normal purple eyes had that raging fire in it, his normal pale skin was slowly starting to dot with blue veins. And his normal pink lips were twisted into a disgusted snarl as he glared at the seven tied boys in front of him.

Alex raised his hand, purple fog emitting from the tip of his fingers, just when one of the boys released a loud cry, his eyes bulging as he tried to look at his shoulder which was being twisted in an odd angle.

"Alex!" I finally screamed, getting my voice back. But Alex didn't seem to hear me, or at least he pretended not to. So I charged forward, preparing  myself as two small tornados swirled in my palms. Slowly, the tornados grew, until they were big enough to charge. With as much as force I could muster, I pushed the tornados at Alex, expecting him to be taken aback or pushed off, but instead, the oddest thing happened.

The Tornados came to an abrupt halt as if something was blocking them. Without any warning, they turned around in full speed and charged right towards me. Before I can protect myself, the tornadoes hit me with a huge impact, my own powers backfiring on me and throwing me across the parking lot.

This was the second time Alex had thrown me in the air, only this time, I didn't steady myself. My back hit the concrete floor with a huge thud, causing me to groan despite the fact that the pain was already easing away.

"Cilia!" Four voices screamed in unison, almost bursting my eardrums. "I'm fine." I said through gritted teeth, slowly sitting up and staring at Alex, who had his full attention now on me.

"Thought I wouldn't sense your arrival didn't you?" He said with venom dripping from every word he uttered, but I could see the faint look of guilt and pain in his eyes as if it hurt him to do what he just did to me. I didn't know what so say as I stood up and walked forward, examining the protective shield Alex had put over in order to keep me out.

"I could smell you from miles away. I knew you were coming."

Smell...me? He can smell me too? We can smell each other?

I turned my attention back to Alex, my face a blank sheet, yet a thousand thoughts ran around in my head. "Alex. You don't want to do this." I said slowly.

"You don't know what I want to do."

It was true. I didn't. But that didn't mean I wasn't going to try to not stall him. The protective shield could have been powerful enough to keep away any other Guardians or Grim Reaper's or Deitys. But not me. I had made that shield myself many times before. I knew it like I knew the back of my hand.

But that didn't mean I could save Sav7 just by removing the shield. I might be powerful, but Alex was cleverer and smarter. He would just need to snap his his fingers and seven hearts would stop beating. The power he possessed was dangerous. I couldn't take my chances.

"You are right. I don't. We barely know each other. How would I know? But if there's one thing I know about you Alex, is that you are not a killer."

"YOU ARE WRONG!" Alex roared but I remained unfazed.

"Am I? Alex you lied to me! You lied to me about almost everything! But you told me you were abandoned by your parents! Was that a lie too?"

Alex removed the shield, only to throw a dagger made out of purple fog at me which evaporated before even touching my coat. But Alex had forgotten to place the shield back.

Good.

"I know what they did to you was wrong. I know that you didn't deserve it, not after all you have gone through, only to be betrayed again by the only people you thought as family." I said slowly taking a step forward, Alex staring at the ground as he breathed heavily. He didn't make an attempt to stop me, so I continued.

"But do you think you are the only one? You think only you had a terrible life before dying! Alex I was murdered by my own mother! How do you think does that make me feel?"

A long silence prevailed as the words sunk in. Alex slowly looked up at me, his eyes large as balls as he realized what I just said. He wasn't expecting that at all. And now he looked as lost as I did when I first dicovered I was officially dead. He then looked at the tied boys but did not speak up yet.

"I have lost so much, so much in my life Alex... so much more than I can ever give. I was a lost soul, succumbing to my own darkness. I wanted more than anything to have my mother punished for what she did. I hated her so much that it drove me mad."

I thought back to those times when I first died, the memories coming back as fresh wounds, memories that I haven't thought about in over years. But here I was revealing them and succumbing to them to save a friend.

"You were done wrong, I get it. But doing this is not going to fix anything. Vengience isnt the answer, you know that Alex, I know you do."

I was just a few steps away from Alex, closer to the boys. The look in Alex face seemed like he was actually considering my words, the fire in his eyes slowly disappearing.

I took another step forward, reaching my hand out to touch him, but the sudden change in his behaviour and the new flame in his eyes had me stopping in mid track as his blazing eyes glared at the boys now behind me.

"Then what was the difference between me and them? What did I do wrong to die that they remained alive and able to fulfill their dreams!?"

"Alex... ca-" But before I can even finish my sentence, Alex released a battle cry before charging a full blast of energy not just at the boys behind me, but myself aswell.

"No!" I screamed but to late, the force came at full speed, so I did the only sensible thing I could find. I used any kind of energy to block the force, perhaps it was wind, because of which the force turned back and slammed straight into Alex, knocking him down a few feet away.

If you think I was sorry, I wasn't. Alex was one reckless Guardian, using his granted powers without thinking about how much energy he was using at one time. Not realizing how much it can drain a person. Perhaps he knew, but didn't care, thinking that he might never die, so why bother?

I lowered my hands, looking at the figure sprawled on the floor as it groaned and tried to sit up. Quickly, I turned back to Sav7 cutting away their binds with just a flick of my wrist.

They were so scared that they couldn't bring themselves to move, staring at me with horror.

"Go. Before I change my mind." I hissed but the boys couldn't find the energy to move. Their legs had gone jelly. One even had the guts to talk to me.

"Wh-what are...you? What is that...that th-thing?"

I turned my full attention to the boy who was actually the leader of Sav7, glaring him straight to the ground.

"You don't wanna know sweet heart. Why don't you be on your merry way, back to your silk beds and stages were you belong hmm? And pretend like all of this was a bad dream? Won't that be just wonderfull sweeties?" I said, my voice sickly sweet. The boys stared at me in more horror, whimpering at my change of voice, which was too sweet compared to my fiery look.

But the boys still made no attempt to move, instead their faces laced with new found fear.

Were they testing my patience? Did they want to know how far I was willing to go?

Before I can give them another snappy comment, one of them points behind me with a shaky finger, the words barely audible from his lips.

'Be-Bea...Bear...its a Bear.....'

Bear? What would a Bear be-

I turned around swiftly and sure enough, there was a Bear, just in front of Alex, crouching beside him and oggling at his face.

What the hell?

At first when Alex noticed it, his face contorted in fear, ready to scream bloody murder but the sound died in his voice. All the while, the Bear did nothing but stare at him, before dipping it head lower and nuzzling its big nose on Alex's face.

Alex shrank away in fear, but at the Bears second try, he did not recoil, rather embraced it. They both stayed like that for long time, Alex finding peace and solace in the warmth of the Bears thick coat of shiny chocolate brown fur.

I stared in disbelieve, completely baffled to see a Bear in the middle of a parking lot in New York city. Where had it come from? It was so huge, as huge as Tan-

Wait! Tan! Of course! Tan had come to me out of nowhere as well, when I was in danger. He was my avatar. Could this mean...this Bear is... Alex's avatar?

"Get out of here. Now!" I screamed at the boys behind me, who wimpered but finally found their solid legs and sprinted away, leaving me alone with the beast and its human master.

A growl echoed, makjng me turn only to find Alex's avatar barring its sharp teeth at me. I stared back at it, forcing myself not to shiver at its growls. Alex slowly stood up, his eyes dark with anger as he glowered at me.

"What. Have. YOU DONE!?" He shrieked and this time, I actually shivered but held my serious expression. I wouldn't let him see my fear.

"I let them go. What else does it look like?"

Without another word, Alex lunged at me. I braced myself for Alex's attack, but it never came. When I looked at him, my eyes turned wide with horror.

Oh lord. What on earth is he doing?

Bright purple electricity crackled all over Alex's body and his Bears. The Bear didn't look like it was affecting him, but the look in Alex's face said he was enduring massive pain. Teeth gritted, Alex's body shone like glitter as the purple electricity travelled all the way accross his veins, coloring him entirely. When he opened his eyes, they were no longer his normal purple shade or even the deep violet. They were a marshmallow purple, but in the most ugliest and deadly way.

Merciful Heavens! He was combining all his powers and that of his Avatars which could kill him once he releases it. A Guardian's magic makes them a Guardian. If he uses it all up in one go, there will be nothing left of him.

Except dark energy.

That's how he will become a demon.

My breath hitched as the realization sunk in. "Alex. What are you doing?" I asked, bracing myself as lightning crackled in my palms, but I didn't engage. Alex snarled before two words escaped his mouth in a raspy tone.

"Ending you."

Everything happened so fast after that. Alex released a battle cry, charging towards me, but I still didn't back away or engage. Alex meant to kill me, and I was doing nothing to stop it. A part of me was wishing for plan B to start, but another part of me told that it was too late.

Just when I thought it was all over, a voice screamed, halting us all in our tracks.

"Alex STOP!"

Alex did as told, suspended in mid way as his eyes grew wide with horror, recognizing the voice instantly. From the entrance emerged four girls, all panting frantically but their horror filled eyes locked on Alex.

"Stop!" Jenna said again. This time, Alex actually lowered his hands, much to my relief. Thank god plan B activated.

"Ho-how...what are...what are you guys doing here?" Alex asked, scanning the four girls for any signs of injury. "We came to stop you Alex. So stop." Laila replied directly, not bothering to beat around the bush.

Without Alex noticing, I placed an invisible shield between him and Fiction, in case he decided to go rogue and hurt them as well. If that happened,  the whole nation, no the whole world would go upside down.

"No. I won't. I shouldn't. She let them go. She let Sav7 go! When she knows what they did to me!! She means to hurt us!" Alex shrieked, pointing an accusive finger at me, making me feel more hurt than angry.

Clara shook her head disparately, tears now freely streamed down her cheeks as she said. "No Alex. You are wrong this time. She's with us. She wants to protect you. We want to protect you! Dont you see it? Killing her or Sav7 won't fix anything! It will only turn you into a demon and take you away from us for good! Do you want that?" The raw emotions in her voice was so intense that it had me looking away.

It was too much. All of this was too much. It was a reminder of the days when I was new to all this myself, and Heathens was my only guide to safety. How many times had I strayed? And how many times did Heathens bring me back? I can't count. All I know is that seeing this scene had brought me to tears, but I held them back, less the situation became too dramatic.

"She's right Alex." Cilia said,  stepping forward and making me remove the shield. "For our sake. If you love us the way we love you, don't do this. Vengeance isn't the answer. Killing them will not give you the peace you think you will get. Destiny will teach them their lesson, you don't have to do it. From now on, all you have to do, is stay with us. Care for us the way we plan to care for you. Won't that be wonderful?"

By now Cilia was face to face with Alex, her hand resting on his shoulder. Her words were as soothing like that of a mother, a mother which I never had. Which Alex never had. He had found the perfect companions to walk with, and he was realizing it now as the electricity disappeared, sucking back in him and his fluffy teddy.

Alex slumped his head down, not ready to look at anyone as silent tears rolled down his eyes, his shoulder vibrating. No one had to ask to know he was guilty, finally taking a lesson from his actions as one by one, starting with Cilia, then Jenna, then Clara and then Laila, to follow in a group hug, covering Alex in the middle.

All the while I stood aside, my tears now running freely as I imagined what it would feel like to be with Heathens again. To feel there warm embrace, to talk, to laugh and to joke with them. But those days weren't coming any time soon, and that only made me cry even harder, not noticing the group had broken the hug, Alex now looking directly at me.

"I'm sorry, Cilia. I'm so so sorry for everything."

The five of them looked at me as they held Alex, soft sad smiles in their faces as they gave me encouraging looks. I knew they had seen me cry, but their judgement was entirely for a different reason. I turned my face away, slightly nodding before saying two words.

"Let's go home."