PRESENT DAY
“The ice queen is going to attend the movie premier of hunted hearts even though she didn’t get the role. Tell me George, why you think she is going to attend.” One newscaster said as he turned to his co-anchor as they discussed my life on the show, trying to think why I am doing something that stars refuse to do, they are thinking too deeply into the actions what they don’t know is that the reason is staring at them right in the face.
“well Anthony I think she is going there to show the writer of the script that she was right about the movie, she could be going there to gloat” George replied.
“That’s not how stars gloat.” Anthony said looking at George not getting the logic behind George thinking obviously just like me too, he wasn’t the only one confused with George analogy.
“true but then again is the Ice Queen like every other normal star, she is will be going there and leave half way just to prove to everybody that the movie is boring and that is why she rejected the script.” George said as Anthony made a noise like a light bulb just went off in his head.
I turned off the to because I couldn’t stand it anymore, they all display me as a bitch and I know that I don’t have any right to complain since I did start the character and I didn’t discredit them when it started to grow into its own brand. The truth is that, this Ice Queen they are talking about isn’t really who I am underneath, the reason I rejected that script was because part of the storyline was too close to my own story with Noah and I couldn’t bear it, I am going to the premier to watch the movie because even though I couldn’t act it that doesn’t mean that the movie won’t be interesting. I will go to the premier and stay way after the movie because I have a feeling that I will end up crying or showing emotions and I need that time to compose myself and put my mask back on. That is the only successful way for me to deal with the world and survive.
My mask cannot go off in public, it will be the death of me. My phone rang and I picked it up just to see it was my manager calling me, I was tempted to not pick because I have a feeling he would want me to leave early so that the bitch personality which I am displaying will shine brightly. Still no matter how tempted I was not to pick I know that I have to pick. “What?” I demanded as soon as I answered the call.
“Are you in front of your to?” josh asked bypassing any form of greeting.
“Yeah, why?” I asked him cautiously, the only time josh is this way is when something big has happened.
“Go to channel seven, hurry.” He said instead and I quickly turn the TV back up and switched channels only to freeze when the new station was displaying my ex smiling face on the screen. I listened to the news as I paled even more, he got a new girlfriend and this time it appears serious … like he was serious with her, like he is finally over me, as I listened to the news, all half hopes I have about us reconciling went down the drain, he has moved on. It took him a long time but he did. I should too.
“Why are you showing me news about Noah and his current flame?” I asked josh who still ignored me.
“Do you recognize her name?” Josh asked instead
“No, why would I want to know his current girlfriend?” I gritted my molars, I am gradually not caring about what news he needs to tell me, I will hang up on him if he doesn’t say it within the next one minute.
“You should know her, you two are going to be in the same reality show.” Josh said patiently as if I am dense, I froze when I heard what he said.
“There is no way I will be in the same show was Noah girlfriend.” I said in an icy cool tone not caring what my company will say on the issue.
“We don’t want that too. That is why this is going to be problem and I called you to avoid it in a large scale, what should we do.”
“Get the car ready and pick me up in an hour, we are going to the reality show producer office.” I said as I hanged up not giving him the chance to tell me that my plan is wrong in various levels.
In an hour time, I wore my signature white fur coat which I have dozens of, it shows people that I am angry, I stepped into the car that was waiting for me outside my apartment building. As soon as I settled into the seat I said “drive” and the drive immediately took off.
Josh was beside me in the car with his glasses on as he perused a couple of papers.
“What is that?” I asked him.
“Your contract with them, I am trying to see what loophole gave them the right to pull something like this. They should know better than to try to get a rise out of you.” Josh answered me as I gritted my teeth. He was right, the reason why they are doing this is for no other reason other than to get me angry and for me to lash out which I don’t do.
“Is the loophole there?” I asked as I rested my head on the seat head rest.
“No, there isn’t one. Our lawyers already gone through this before they told us it was safe to sign.”
“In that case, let’s get there. They want a display. They will get one.”
“You can’t be serious” the producer said in a mini burst of anger while I calmly sipped my tea as if it is every day that I pull out of signed contracts.
“And please, do enlighten me, why can’t I be serious. The reality show is amazing, I am sure you can get another female to replace me… and do try to not to make her angry.” I told him so calmly that a tic went up near his brow.
“Be reasonable Tiffany, this show will make free publicity for you and a lot of people would like to watch you and her besides, you are over Noah right. It won’t matter.” The producer added as I was tempted to pour the reminder of my tea over him.
“So you want to sell a story on me and her and not pay us extra. You are a slime bag. I appreciate your offer but I decline.” I said with a touch of humor on my voice.
“Fine, I will increase your money.” The producer offered as I smile coldly at him and leaned in.
“You don’t get it do you. I don’t want your honesty, I want you groveling as you beg for me to reconsider and still even then I wouldn’t because you lost your chance. If you want to sue me for breaking the contract please do and I will see you in court while you explain yourself to the judge.” I said as I stood up and walked out of room with Josh at my heels
In the car on my way home to get ready for the premier, Josh started talking.
“That will teach him something, I can’t wait for him to post it on their Twitter handle that you are no longer doing the show, let your fans take care of attacking him for you.”
I rolled my eyes. “Stop deceiving yourself Josh, I don’t have those kind of Fans, now stop talking, I need to get into the right mind frame before the premier.”
“And speaking of the Premier, we want you to try and leave in the middle of it all.”
I sighed as I felt an upcoming headache, arguing with Josh always brings out the worst of them. “I am not leaving the theatre early just to try and prove that I am a bitch. I am going there because I want to, not for any other reason so don’t turn this into another work moment for me.”
“I am not trying to turn it into a work moment but when your actions are on the display and you are an actress, everything where you go in public turns into a work thing for you.” Josh said as I relaxed deeper into my seats.
“Josh, don’t make hate you.” With those words, I turned my face away from him as he sighed. He knew better than to try and talk to me now.
Maybe this acting career just wasn’t it for me. Yes I have the fame but I also have no privacy. Josh was pretty excited when this movie came in but once he saw the script, he knew I couldn’t do it. The only way I should be around that movie from the beginning to the end was at home, in my comfy blankets and a pint of ice cream in the fridge to make me feel better when my skin goes all red and hot for crying too much.
Sometimes though, I am just a sucker for pain.
PRESENT DAYMy tears keeps falling but I am trying my best to be quiet about it all. It wouldn’t be right if they saw the ice queen brawling her eyes out over a silly rom com. It wasn’t right that I was crying my eyes out over it but it is what happen when something reminds you that you lost the best thing ever that was ever yours, you don’t care for right or wrongs. Sometimes you just sit down and cry your eyes out.“You actually stayed until the end. I am so honored.” The Script writer said when she reached the place I was sitting down, a little bit separated from the others. I knew this was going to happen and still I let it happen.Why do I enjoy hurting myself?Maybe because I feel like I haven’t been punished enough for losing him.“There is nothing to be honored about.” I fused an annoyed tone into my words, I needed to make people believe that I did not give a care about wh
Five years agoI entered the complex where we were staying, Noah was doing his part time job and I was still getting tiny roles, they could pay the rent but we didn’t have enough money for anything else. That was why walking into a candlelit dinner brought tears to my eyes even though I knew it was a splurge.“Noah.” I breathed his name with barely concealed excitement. “You shouldn’t have.”“Why?” he asked as he lit the candles. “Until you forgot that I am a romantic guy, nah. I wouldn’t let that happen on my watch.”And still he did not come to where I was standing by the door. “I miss You.” I tell him and that was what took his ass to stand up and walked towards him. Still he did not stop when he was closed to him, he stopped when I had to tilt my head backwards to look at him.“I miss us.” Came his simple reply.“We might not have much now but we certainly will in the fu
NOAHEven when I am fighting with Lucy, I still think of Tiffany. Yes that is how badly that girl, my ex has dug herself into my skin, I don’t even bother trying to remove her again. I was done with that stage a long time ago, I just learnt how to live with her in my memories and stopped deceiving myself that some other girl will be able to take her place eventually.Lucy however, I thought was different. I didn’t get to think much about Tiffany when I was her so I used it to convince myself that I was finally getting over the ice queen but right now, it’s like I am back to where I was before I started dating Lucy, thinking of other girls fifty percent and Tiffany as the other fifty.Normally I would get mad at myself. I mean these girls did not break my heart for crying out loud, Tiffany did with her words, she has always being good with them and as if that was not enough, she just had to calve out the heart by cheating on me and
NoahI got to my apartment, tired and weary thoughts about writing new music and not just any kind of music but dope ones filled my head and when the door swing opened, I smiled while I realized that Lucy was probably here and possibly cooking.Maybe I will not remain angry with her. I rounded off to the kitchen where I can almost always guarantee to find her, there was always something about kitchens that Lucy loves.Getting closer, I started hearing voices, not like I was expecting her to be here with company but it will be a pleasant surprise if she is. Normally it was the guys who were relunant to introducing their friends to the girl they were dating but in me and Lucy relationship, it was the opposite. Probably because I didn’t have any friend here and Lucy wouldn’t be caught somewhere which is not in the map for something spectacular, even if I was hosting a show there. Now her case was different. She has the friends but she still just
Four years ago.NoahIt has been two weeks since I walked out of Tiffany with no hopes for reconciling ever again… in other words, it has been two weeks of utter hell. I have learnt the trick to getting some sleep, I have to exhaust my body to the point where all I wish for was a bed, that works like a dream because when I started to do that, my dreams were no longer haunted with dreams of Tiffany while she was being kissed and being thrust into. We were each other firsts. It might seem inconsequential now, especially with me wondering how many other guys she has been while she was with me and how many guys she has been with since I was gone.The paparazzi’s have been having a field day, we went from being nowhere to everywhere on gossip rags. I guess our actions did not help that. I was sleeping with everything in a skirt and she has been partying every night, sometimes taking a guy or two home.We both
NoahAfter carrying out my promise to Lucy by tweeting to my fans about my recent break up, I got drunk in the comfort of my home but when I woke up with my head banging, I had the itch to write something down. It was not my usual kind of writing but if it was worked well on, it could be charts topping.And so after finding a pen and paper, I started my scribbling. I was still scribbling hours later when I yawned, raising my head from the paper to see that my manager, Ernie, was in the room with me.“When did you get here?” I asked him, shocked at his appearance in my home, something which he doesn’t do too often anymore.“About two hours ago, you have been scribbling like a fiend, I am sure that your coke has not lost some of its coolness though. He tossed a drink at me.I snatched it out of the air. “Thanks man.” I opened the drink, took a sip and close my eyes.“Noah, this Brea
TiffanyHearing about the breakup of Lucy and Noah apparently made it okay for me to go on the show even though she was still going to be there. A lot of things were shaking in Hollywood currently and my company didn’t want to shake more.That didn’t mean that I didn’t keep my righteous anger about everything though. I was still very mad over their actions and the decision they made without involving me. Since Josh represented my company for me, he has been the one getting the blunt of my disapproval about what they did.I was backstage at a talk show, still not talking to Josh. “What do you want me to do? Clean your tears and apologize for something which I have no control over besides you are both his ex so I don’t see the reason why you should still hate the show. You were excited for the show before you knew who that particular housemate is…” When I raised an eyebrow he corrected himself. “Well as much as a woman of your
TiffanyTwo hours later, I had downloaded all of Noah’s song and I was listening to them while getting drunk, he bared himself out for the public to see. That was why he was loved. It was years ago but I could feel the words as he sang them, I could hear the emotions. I watched one of his stage performance for the only soft song on his first album released and when he got to the chorus for the last time and everything changed and became more emotional. He had tears in his eyes as he sang from the heart and that was when my tears started.I did that to him. He was singing of our past, he was singing about us and how I wrecked him. I was aware of the fact that I did ruin what we had but that stage performance made me realized how far the hurt went.“Tiffany, you should stop tormenting yourself with this.” Josh said unable to keep quiet anymore. Yes you might have fucked up then but you are human, humans make mistakes all the time.”
Six years agoTiffany.“Tell me that you are not going to wear that to our prom.” Noah said behind him as his hands settled on my waist. Yes, I could always recognize my boyfriend, even when he was not in his jeans and tee shirts but in a rented Tux for our prom.“Why?” I asked him. “Is it not okay?” I asked, already working myself up, I wanted this night to be perfect, it was going to be our firsts, I became certain that he was the one for me and so why would I wait any more, it would be a big disaster if this night started with some bad luck such as a bad gown.“Relax okay.” Noah laughter rang behind me as he took his hands from my waist. “You look out of this world, that is the only problem, you are going to outshine whoever the prom queen is.” He said as I breathed in relief.“Don’t worry, out prom will be magical I have already arranged it.” He added.“What a
Noah.When we saw Toby slap Tiffany, we were almost in position, I was with the officer which Tiffany referred to as Asshole, in the end, he was the one who came through bu=y choosing to remain with me while others searched different parts of the city, I decided to start from more logical places, Her place, Toby place. Our apartment where he raped her and according to what I heard, the next person who rented that place after us was Toby and that only took me to this place. The place where our journey began and surprise, surprise they were here. I almost lost my head when he slapped Tiffany but seeing the damaged done to him, I would say the girls gave him a hell of a time and then the bastard decided to kick Amy, Nobody told Miles A.K.A Asshole to shoot the dame gun. At least he didn’t kill Toby, just on his leg, damn waste if you ask me.I left Toby for Miles as I went to Tiffany, I scooped her up and carried her to where Amy was lying down
Noah.Tiffany and Amy was missing. Toby was not seen at home and Ainsley did not know where he was. Figures. This was the night he choose to make his final move, why couldn’t he wait until tomorrow, I was back in California but that was a lot of place to cover. None of Ashton guys saw anything but they were the first to alert Ashton who in turn alerted me, Due to Ashton pull, we go the police force worrying with us but it was not enough, I fear that we probably not reach them in time.Dear God, please let her be safe, let them be unharmed when we get to them.*************TiffanyI woke up slowly, the bed under me was hard and the air smelled stale, like granite and construction. That was weird, was that a new air fragrance with Amy tried to try, she is always trying new things, I haven’t complained after all it was her house but this was the first time she was trying to mess with the air.&n
Tiffany.The after party hosted for the wrapping up of the acting of the movie was amazing but I couldn’t put up with the smiling, passive bitch face anymore, I was tired and my nerves were frayed. I needed to go and be out of the spotlight, who knew that acting would be so hard when it is the last thing that you wanted to do.On getting to Amy’s home, I realized that I would need to return to my own house soon, my welcome might not be overstayed based on the fact that I had been busy so I was not really around much in Amy’s place but that is going to change, now that I would be staying inside every day, I had no other movie lined up yet and the acting of this movie actually ended before time, it was supposed to end next week but when you have created false news about you dating your costar and you can show that you can act very well with him.For example to the rest of the world, my chemistry with Jason was off the charts and that
NoahIt has been two weeks since I left for tour, Two weeks where I felt real heartbreak. I didn’t have any hope with Tiffany, she had moved on and I couldn’t stop beating myself up about it. I was mourning during the day and every night, I was putting on a smile and greeting fans. Io was meeting with girls who would do anything to have me in their bed and their lives and still none of that attracted me, they never did.I was a glutton for punishment, that was the only way why I would torture myself with imaginations of Tiffany following me around on my tours as either my girlfriend or wife with zero to no chance of that being possible in reality.“You are still stuck in your head Noah.” Ernie said concerned as he placed a glass of milk in front of me.“I stopped strumming my guitar as I raised my head at him. “What is this?”“Milk.” He replied like that solved the golden question.
NoahCody was my next stop and I was on his trail, I tracked him down to his apartment which he stays in the city.“Hello Noah. What an unexpected surprise?” He said, as he stood on the doorway of his place when he opened the door, his eyes darted back into the house and he looked at me like he didn’t want me to see what was in there. ‘From my experience that means that he was hiding something which he didn’t want people to see and I was curious to see what it was.“Can I come in?” I asked him out of politeness.“Now is not really a good time.” He said, gripping the door tighter. What excuse could he have? Toby was in the middle of fucking a girl when he came to answer me.“Too bad, I can’t really come back later. Cody, can I come in?” I enunciated each word separately so he could get that the question I was asking was not really a question.
Noah.“When you said, you were coming today, I had actually thought you would come in the afternoon or something.” Toby said cleaning his sweat on a towel, he was in a bath robe when he opened the door to me and from the way the girl who slipped out when I was entering glared at me, I knew what he was in the middle of even if I didn’t want to know.I really wish I can wipe that image from my mind.“Why would I come in the afternoon?” I asked him.“You know, sleeping off a hangover.” He said and when I just looked at him. “You are selling your image as the perfect guy or what not but don’t tell me that you don’t party and live that lifestyle, hell bro. that lifestyle is invented for guys with the pretty little tag of Rock star and that is what you are.”“I hate to disappoint you bro.” I said after a while. “I don’t drink to get to that extent.”“Damn, you really are perf
Noah.Hell. That is what I have been in since I walked out of my home, leaving Tiffany to get her things while calling Amy to help her. That hell is not easier as the days roll by, instead. It gets harder.The only way in which I have been keeping my sanity is to look for the bastard responsible for everything, Finding him has become my purpose and mission in life. He said he would not torture her but he never said he would not kidnap her, that is almost inevitable. I don’t know exactly what he was waiting for but I was not going to stand around waiting for him to kidnap her before I would do anything about it.And that was why I was trying to exhaust myself with finding this mystery person. I even went out on a date with Tracy just to ask her some questions of who she suspects coming to the girls’ wings when they were sleeping. I discovered that she had a little case of insomnia after the show and as luck would have it, her
Tiffany.“You want me to do what?” I asked Amy, pretty sure that maybe someone hit her and she has concussion or something as horrible as that.“Rebound with Jason.” She repeated with ease as if I was not in danger of strangling her.“I am sorry but are you insane?” I tried to say in a rational voice but everything rational left me the moment she started trying to play the arranged match maker. Believe me it didn’t just start this way, she started with asking tiny weird questions like, isn’t Jason cute in a teddy bear sort of way? Do I know that he was single and he kind of fancies me? Like we would be perfect for each other and so on and so forth, now those questions although it seems weird are okay to ask because she is my friend and cares for my best interest at heart but this. Hell no!“Now, calm down Tiffany and hear me out.” Amy started but no, I was not going to do that either.“Why? S