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Reliving The Nightmare
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Hush, Baby The Truth In The Lie
“What do you mean that this has nothing to do with me?” I stand in the corner as I watch myself put on a token of a fight, I saw the anger and the hurt in my eyes, it was evident, but my words and my voice weren’t as angry, as if I was holding back.“It doesn’t, Nat, you know I cannot publicly be with you, we have already talked about this!” he answers me with a tired expression, and I see he is trying to choose his words as well, something about this conversation doesn’t feel quite right, as if we both have something to lose.“That doesn’t mean you are free to date her, so openly and publicly, I never protested on our relationship being a secret but only because it was also exclusive, but this?” oh…so this is the infamous fight, I think as I smile bitterly, another piece falling into the puzzle.“Being public with her is the main point of being with her, I need the PR, and I need her father’s connections, this is not about feelings.” Nate tried to reason with me, but what he doesn’t
Hush, Baby Drained Out Of Resistance
Up, and down, then up, and down again, then swallow, and then put another spoon filled with what tastes like ash into your mouth and repeat the process. I force myself to eat, not because I care about the way my insides feel whenever I don’t eat for a long period of time, in fact, I would welcome this feeling and allow it to consume me from the inside until I perish, but because I know he would take it as an act of disobedience and come up with a new way to punish me, the last time I refused to eat he destroyed my asshole, and that wasn’t the worse part, no, it was the fact that he invited two of his equally despicable friends to watch as he did so.I thought that after this time, after all those punishment where he violated every hole in my body, I became immune to it, but he always came with new ways to hurt me, when I became numb to physical pain, he opted to humiliation instead, exposing me to other monsters, a shiver runs down my spine as I remember how he prevented me from usin
Hush, Baby Prologue
Why did this happen to us? right when I thought everything was finally going to be okay?Who is the one to blame?Is it us? Is it life?Can we blame it on life? Or was this entirely our own doing?But why us? And why you?The unanswered questions don’t linger for long, they fade away slowly into oblivion as if they never existed, and that scares me because they leave void and emptiness behind.The questions were painful, true, but I want them back, this void is much worse, it doesn’t cause me any pain, just numbness, random nihilism, nothing!I lift my heavy head and search the room I am in with my eyes, everything around me is either black or grey, I feel like I know this place but don’t know it in the same time, it is familiar in a way but completely new in another, I try to pinpoint the change that made me feel this way about this place, but I can’t, it feels as if I am looking at it with new eyes. I hear something in the back, it is noisy and disturbing but I can’t figure it out,
Hush, Baby Black Room
Where am I? I ask myself as I open my eyes in this strange…room, if I may call it that!A tomb would be a more befitting word thanks to these black walls, but unlike a tomb, this place is neither tight nor suffocating, it is quite spacious actually, the only flaw in it, besides the strange choice of color, is the roof, it is not only black but also low, lower than average that is, not to the point where I can’t stand tall on my feet though, it just feels closer I guess.The ground under me is black as well, as if made of perfectly sculpted obsidian, it is neither cold nor hot, and surprisingly not hard on my body, it feels as if I am laying on a mattress instead, not the fanciest but one which is decent enough to not give me sore muscles, what catches my attention though are the small little pattern engraved on the floor, they are beautiful, small, and unique, but above all, familiar, I don’t really recall where I have seen them before, nevertheless, they are really beautiful and I li
Hush, Baby Abused
“Calm down, Natalia! Focus on my voice!” I look at the doctor who came to stand in front of me, her blue eyes staring at me with concern, and in her glasses, I see the reflection of another woman!Scooting away from her, I back away using my hands until my back hits the wall, it is not the doctor who made me this scared though, it is the reflection I saw on her glasses, and the realization that came with it.That woman! With the black messy hair and a dead pale face was me! I was looking at myself and yet I didn’t recognize me! Seeing my state, the doctor returns to her earlier spot next to me and starts patting my back again, I want to thank her, to tell her how much I am grateful for this small gesture of hers, and that I don’t want to be left alone in this state I am in, but I don’t, I can’t, and I am in no state to care about my good manners while surrounded with these questions and ambiguity.“It is okay, Natalia, you are safe now!” it is not okay! How can she say that it is okay
Hush, Baby Traumatized
I place my hand on my knee, trying to force that annoying tremble to subside, it looks as if I am trying to dig a hole in the closed courtroom’s floor and I doubt anyone would be happy if I ruined the expensive-looking tiles.I try and take deep breaths, hoping it might calm me down but it is of no use whatsoever, I feel like I am about to faint, these last few days have been nothing but a tormenting vortex of questions and revelations that only lead to more questions.Seeing my uneasiness, Maisie, the nice doctor takes my hand in hers and offers me an encouraging smile which barely provides me with any encouragement, I return it nevertheless, out of gratitude toward her kindness and for being here for me today.Out of all the people in this city, Maisie happened to be my best friend and my ex-roommate, we even worked together in the same hospital, only that I was a nurse, it explains how good she has been treating me so far, she knows me better than anyone else, and therefore answered
Hush, Baby Drained
“Shall we continue?” the representative asks once I am back with Maisie and Emma to the room, I feel a little better now after the little stroll we have taken in the court's park, the air wasn't exactly fresh but it helped me relax a little ad gather my thoughts, I am not as panicked and shocked as I was when I heard what Dr. Jones said earlier, not as bad at least.Taking my seat, I nod at the representative and my senior, telling them that i am feeling better and ready to continue this hearing. However, I avoid looking at that Williams' guy at all costs, I feel his eyes on me though, his lawyers are talking among themselves in a very serious manner while he is just sitting quietly as if this matter doesn’t concern him , all he does is look at me with undecipherable eyes and I refuse to look back at him, I need to keep it together for the rest of this hearing, I need to know what happened to me and I need to figure out my next move once I do.Seeing that I was feeling better, Dr. Jone
Hush, Baby Suspicious
Fuck, why can’t I stop these tears?I try to wipe them away but they keep on falling like waterfalls, I try to calm down, take few breaths, squeeze all the tears out, but nothing seems to work.I give up on my attempts and look at that Williams guy with an angry face, drenched with tears and snot, yeah I really don't care right now, I am not bothered with my looks, I am bothered with the way he is looking at me! why in the hell is he looking at me like that? With those sad and pitiful eyes of his, I don’t want his pity, I want to know what he did to me.“We are still waiting for your answer, Mr. Williams, if you haven’t done anything to her, then why did she end up like this? And why did we find her in that state at your house?” Emma asked with a raised brow, a defiant look on her face, at first I am happy with her aggressive tone, it is so satisfying for my ears, however, I can't help but notice the way they are looking at each other, I don't know why but I feel like this isn't the fi
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