The kit

“Shit!” Hannah yelled and caught the bottle before it reached the ground. I could not force a word of thanks to her, or peel my eyes away from her phone.

It wasn’t the caption that got to me. When you are famous, unwarranted rumors tend to spread, especially when you’re more secretive. I had seen posts shipping me and fellow cast members, him and other members of high society, a few deep founded allegations about our relationship…so the tagline was nothing new.

It wasn’t the headline that had me moving in a mindless gait to an empty folding chair, it was the picture…pictures! I discovered in horror, as I scrolled down the article.

It was her. Pierce’s first love was with him in every photo, a big smile on her face. She was back and in his arms. Pierce seemed to be supporting her weight with his body while she clung to him like every breath in her body was fueled by his presence.

I didn't need the caption to tell it's her because she looked like me. Or I should say, I looked like her. It almost looked like It was me in his arms from some certain angles.

But I could never be her. 

I was never the girl Pierce was glad and proud to show the world with.

The loud ringing in my ears left me dazed. She was supposed to be a ghost from the past, not here getting cozy in an embrace. I would rather have him holding a different woman than her. 

Hannah extended my flask to me and I grabbed at it, feeling extremely thirsty. So that was why he was in such a hurry to leave that morning. His emergency was arriving at the airport early enough to pick her up. Why didn’t he tell me she was coming back into his life? A laugh bubbled out of my mouth. Was she going to take her place in Pierce’s life again? More importantly, is that what he wanted?

I always knew from the bottom of my heart that my relationship with Pierce was not going to work out eventually despite my pathetic hope, but I didn't realize the end to come so abruptly either, catching me completely off guard.

Hannah called my name carefully. I likely looked like I was losing my mind. I needed to get my shit together. Every one of the cast members had seen the post, I was sure, and would be watching for my reaction.

On cue, Sarah waltzed in from whatever part of hell she had been hiding in since we left the set.

“I was going to give you the news of the century but judging from your face you have already seen it.” she said snidely, smirking at me

“Back off, snake.” Jace warned. Of all people to come to my defense, I thought of him last.

I must look terrible for him to be standing up for me.

“Mind your business minion, I’m just having a conversation with the star of the show.” She said sarcastically. “You know I would have mistaken her for you, the blonde hair, face-you’re basically her but taller. But then I realized that Blackwood would never be caught dead with his hands around you like that in public.”

I felt sick to my stomach, I’d been having these episodes more frequently but they had been because I was worried about this interview, now, I felt sick for a whole other reason. I took one look at Sarah and knew it wasn’t worth it to talk to her. I wasn’t even sure I could get a word out without my voice breaking from all the hurt that was building in my chest.

“I need to use the restroom.” I gritted out to Hannah, handing her my bottle and rising slowly from the chair.

Sarah laughed. “Oh come on Myra, you’re acting like you thought you’d be more than a good fuck for Pierce. Wait, did you think you had a chance with him. Were you imagining a white picket fence, three kids and a dog?” she mocked.

“That’s enough of that.” Hannah chided. “It’s a rumor that circulated a long time ago. Let it go.”

I had to say something, if I walked out without saying a word it would look like I was leaving with my head between my legs. I took in a deep steadying breath, schooling my features before I turned to face Sarah again. I planted my hand on my hip and cocked my head to the side. “For someone who spends most of her evenings fucking Lancaster to stay on this show, you certainly have a loud mouth.”

Jaws dropped to the ground, while Sarah turned red in the face.

“What the hell are you talking about?” she screamed in my face.

“Oh you know, rumors and all that, it doesn’t help that you smell like him when you come back to the studio.” My other cast members hid their faces behind their hands. “Word of advice though, If you want to be the main lead next time, you gotta move up. There’s only so much our director can do, try fucking the producer-or studio head but for now, do your best cope with the fucking fact that I earned this role and no amount of snide comments or bumping uglies you do will change that.”

Without waiting for her comeback I spun around and headed to the women’s room, the expression on her face lending me the strength that I needed.

Hannah was right behind me and locked the door to the room when she was sure we were the only ones present.

“That was a long time coming.” She said dryly. “Took you a while to bring out that inner fire I love so much.”

“There’s no use pretending to be a placid little doll anymore.” I shrugged and dropped onto the bench defeated. It had been all for Pierce. The easy smiles while with him and in the industry. Accepting offensive or dismissive words so I could fit into his image of me; the docile perfect girlfriend who never asked for more.

“So it’s safe to say that you’re really dating him.” she stated. “I understand your need to keep your relationship private, but why didn’t you tell me you were in this deep?”

“For one I’m not supposed to be deep in anything. It was a strict ‘friends with benefits’ situation, if you can even call us friends, more like strangers with benefits.” I choked back a sob, “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this.”

I replayed every minute I had spent with Pierce, the last few months in my head. We had been good together, I was sure I hadn’t imagined him loving me back… he loved her. When he looked at me he saw her, his first love.

I looked up at Hannah. “I’m such an idiot.”

“Oh don’t say that love. Pierce is wealthy, and the wet dream of every woman in Hollywood. You were bound to fall for him.”

“…and now, I’ll be losing him!” Fear clawed at my heart. In the two years I spent with him, separating had never been a thought in my mind. I understood that it would take him a while to realize he loved me but this??

”What if I’m wrong?” I said quickly. “There could be a perfectly reasonable explanation for him being with her at the airport. He could’ve been keeping it a secret because he wasn’t sure how I’d react.” That sounded sane. I nodded to myself, accepting my own explanation.

“Honey I’ve been in Hollywood longer than you, Those two were quite an item back in the day, if she’s back…”

“They can be friends.” I argued back.

Hannah raised her hands in surrender, “True. There could be a great explanation for this that he’ll tell you soon enough.”

“Yes.”

“…And there might be something else you’ll want to talk to him about.” My brows furrowed as she began rooting in her bag . “I know this is bad timing considering the news you just had, but I’ve been keeping this for over a week now and I think it’s about time you checked. If things are great then I could be wrong, if not…we’ll figure it out.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Gimme a sec.” frustrated at not finding what she was looking for, she dumped the content of her bag onto the floor.

“Aha!” she reached down and picked up a packet, which she proceeded to hand to me.

“What’s this?” I stared at the box with a blank face.

“It’s a pregnancy test kit. For you.”